How do you save a man made of steel?
by Kaimi Hoshi
Summary: SR Lois is drifting away from Richard. Could she really be falling for Clark Kent?Luthor's men attack Clark at work and Lois is the one that pays when she takes the bullets.Clark sits helplessly with guilt watching his loved ones suffer for his life Ch.41
1. Blue eyes

**Hello fellow Superman fans! Just a few quick notes: This is my first Superman fic and I have the worst possible grammar you could ever imagine. I apologize and am deeply sorry for any spelling or grammar related issues you may find in this fic. I have a bad writing program and sometimes when I edit my stories some of the grammar and punctuation don't always come up, they'll be missing. I've re-uploaded a few times just to make all grammar as proper as I can. I hope to become a much better writer one day so please deal with me as I practice my writing skills on simple fanfic's. I really hope you enjoy what's ahead of you, please no flames…they're just downright mean! Constructive criticism is fine though. **

**I hate the summary I had to put out here's a better one on what your about to read:**

_**SR Lois begins drifting away from Richard when she and Clark are sent to investigate another one of Luther's plots. She starts questioning all of her thoughts, could she really be falling for Clark Kent? She's put to the test when Luthor's men attack and try to kill him, she saves Clark's life by taking the bullets. Now Clark sits helplessly with guilt watching his loved ones suffer for his life. **_

**Anyway on with story!**

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_**Chapter 1: Blue eyes**_

Lois Lane stared down blankly at the yellow pasta curled around her fork. While her physical self sat at the dinner table, with warm presence of her family around her, Lois's mind was lost somewhere in the mist of thought.

This is how she had carried on for the past few weeks, like a zombie around the newsroom. Completely absorbed in her daydreams and reflections. Even in the comforts of her own home and family, she remained adrift in her sea of questions and contemplations. With her mind occupied in dream land, her family and co-workers took absolutely no notice to her strange behaviour, which was one of the many gifts of the talented Lois Lane. To fool the world when she was at her worst into thinking she was perhaps at the top of her game. Not only was it her famed ability, but her duty as a valuable reporter to the _Daily Planet_, and a much needed wife and mother at home.

And who did she blame for her programmed, robot like state? The same person that remained constantly on her mind 24 hours a day...

"Superman!" The excited little voice echoed through her mind, snapping her out of her trance. "He's on T.V again"

"When is he _not_?" Lois muttered quietly under her breath. The television across from the dinning room blared on about Superman's latest victory against the forces of evil….in other words, there was _another_ bank robbery.

"Anyway, Lois," Richard continued the conversation he'd been yakking on about for the past twenty minutes. Lois of course not having the slightest idea what he was talking about, only gave a few brief nods and sighs of response. "I realize these past couple of weeks have been a lot for you to deal with, now that Superman has…returned." He cleared his throat. Lois at least somewhat paying attention this time. "I have to say, I'm really…impressed. You've dealt with this very well, and that got me thinking, maybe you're really…_over_ him"

She shifted her eyes towards him. He clearly did not have the skill of mind reading, thank god actually. Or their relationship probably would have ended before it even began.

Lois sighed regretfully, "Yeah, maybe you're right, Richard. Maybe I've finally realized that that part of my life is over." Another lie to add to the list.

"Well now, since that's settled, perhaps you might have thought about…setting a date."

She dropped her utensil and looked up across the candle lit dinner table at her…fiancé. She could hardly even choke out the word anymore.

"Richard I…" She glanced over at the tiny midget staring up into his loving mother's gaze. She did _not_ want to do this now, especially not in front of Jason. "I don't think…why do we…" She knew she couldn't even get near the sensitive topic of marriage without Richard going out into a rage. But thankfully this time, he put a halt in the conversation before she could respond.

"Never mind, Lois." He said in a deep, disappointed voice.

"It's not that I don't want too, Richard. It's that I'm-"

"Still waiting for Superman to sweep you off your feet?" He excused himself from the table in a huff, not bothering to even give Jason a blink.

"Mommy," Jason said so innocently and full of concern. "Is Daddy… jealous of Superman? Because I _like_ Superman, but I'll always _love_ my Daddy."

Lois couldn't help but smile warmly at her son. He was so kind hearted, and he always somehow found a way to blame himself for their bickering.

"Don't worry munch-kin." She rubbed her hand through his fair hair. "Daddy knows you'll always love him."

* * *

"_Bzzz! Bzzz! Bzzz! Bzzz_!" The sound of the morning alarm clock rang painfully in Clark Kent's overly sensitive ears, just as he had pulled over the covers attempting to crawl into bed. 

The red digital lettering of 7:00am flashed on the screen as Clark sighed. It had been a long and busy night, and he was so looking forward to some mental rest and recuperation. Two burglaries, a fire, a flood and even a kidnapping. Now, just as he was about to retire from the long night, he was called upon once again to battle the forces of the evil newsroom reporters of the _Planet_.

A hero's work is never done.

* * *

"Oh g-good morning, Lois." Clark stuttered when he stumbled into Lois Lane, tripping over the scattered papers of the hectic newsroom. 

"Good morning, Clark," Lois couldn't help but permit herself a small chuckle at Clark's infamous clumsiness.

"KENT! LANE! OFFICE! NOW!" Perry White was man of little, but very loud words.

"Does he really have to blare across the room this early?" Lois yawned to herself. "We better find out what he wants..." Clark timidly treaded softly after Lois into Perry's solitude of an office.

"I'll get straight to the point," Perry began his typical lecture on their new project "Two words: Lex Luthor..."

Lois let out an ear disturbing groan.

"Problem, Miss Lane?" Perry raised his eyebrows at her lack of manners.

"Well, considering the fact he just tried to drown my entire family a few weeks ago, I'm just not exactly hyped up to hop aboard this story as fast as I got on that retched boat."

"A terrible mistake that was, Lois. But a story is a story. Clark, you're on board aren't you?"

"Uh-sure, whatever you need me for, Mr. White." Poor Clark wasn't in any place to argue.  
Partly because he was the one who gave the information to Perry that Luthor had escaped from the island he was confined to. And partly because he owed Perry about ten stories from the past few weeks of ditching his day job for his usual night part time.

Lois sighed; she might as well see what Perry had to say. "What is it that you want me to do?"

"Lex Luthor, has left the island. He's supposed to be cooking up some ultimate revenge plan for Superman downtown in an abandoned warehouse."

"And you want us to…_stop _him?" Lois gave Perry an awkward look.

"I want you to go down there and expose him! Get any information you can on the warehouse and the current whereabouts of Luthor!"

"This sounds more like a job for Sup-" She cut herself off. "The police."

"Think of it this way, Lois. If we can expose Luthor and chase him out of Metropolis, the entire staff of the _Planet_ will be a hero in the public's eye! We'll have Luthor running so fast out of town before you can even say _Superman_."

"Where did you get all this info anyway, Perry?"

"Anonymous tip."

Clark grunted and looked away shamefully. That 'anonymous tip' had actually come from Clark on a nearby payphone. His plan was to do just as Perry had said. Clark had hoped Perry would pick him for the job to get Luthor and his team out of Metropolis, without having to go all _Super_ on them. What would he have looked like if Luthor hadn't been in the warehouse after all and he just blew a building to pieces for no reason? The investigating was for the reporter in him. And he was desperately trying to avoid any reason to have confrontation with Luthor in such a public and open manner. Though he hadn't meant to drag poor Lois into his guilty plan. "Mr. White if Lois d-doesn't want to join me, I'd be more than able to do this alone-"

"Nonsense, Kent! You and Lois are the best two reporters we've got. And a brave soldier like you has to have back-up in case you get yourself caught up in a mess. Besides, you two are team, always have been! You and Lois used to-"

"Alright," Lois surrendered. She didn't need to go strolling down memory lane. "I'll get you the story," she turned her attention to the shy reporter in the corner "_With_ Clark."

Perry beamed with pride "Excellent, another story I can add for the_'Adventures of Lois and Clark! _file."

* * *

"We're in over our heads, Kent." Lois pounded on sharp, wooden, creaky door. "It's locked, how are we supposed to even get in?" 

"Well, let me have try at it." She didn't particularly want to waste time with Clark trying to break into the abandoned shack they'd been assigned to investigate. What were the chances a little guy like Clark Kent could open a tightly bolted-"Ops." Clark flinched as the door fell down at their feet with a thud. Lois stood wide eyed at Clark.

"Have you been working out or something, Kent?" She was amazed at Clark's sudden ability of strength.

"Uh well, the door was probably worn down the t-termites and your kicking..."

Lois took out a tissue from her purse and wiped off Clark's glasses from the dust that flew up into his face. She couldn't help but be entranced by his bright, sky blue eyes.  
"Thank…thank you, Lois. Shall we go in?" His eyes danced around nervously trying to doge her intense gaze.

"Oh-right." Back to the job and out of her fantasies.

She stepped carefully over the piles of termites and crawling inside the pitch black room.

"Gosh, it's awfully dark in here," Clark observed.

"Of course. It's the perfect atmosphere for an evil psycho-path." Her voice echoed, bouncing off the concrete walls. She sighed, "Come on, Clark. There's nothing here. Let's just…Clark?"

"Huh?" He seemed to be staring upward, literally scanning for something on the floor above them.

"Are you listening? Let's go."

"Wait, Lois. I think I hear something..."

She waited a moment and listened for herself what Clark was babbling on about. "I don't hear anything, Clark." She reported, losing her patience.

"Upstairs. I'll go check it out, you can stand watch." He moved swiftly past her and up the creaky stairs at the back of the tiny, isolated, bare room.

_Lois Lane stand watch?_ Since when had Clark Kent gone all macho, protective over her?

"I don't think so." She followed after him. If there was a story here, she was going to get it _with_ Clark.

She must have climbed four flights of stairs before Clark halted suddenly.

"Shh," He whispered gently to her as he pointed to the door next to them. She heard two very low, mumbled voices. Men's voices by the tone of them, but she could hardly catch every other word. How in the world could Clark have heard them four floors below?

"The little one----Lex needs----" It was no good for Lois, the sentences were too scrambled for her to make out. Clark seemed to be having no trouble though. He pressed himself right up against the door as his face flooded with fear.

"Clark?" She mouthed silently. "What is it?"

"Lex does work here…" He answered. "His men anyway..."

She attempted to listen in again. "Lo---ne. We get them and -----man will have no----Lex's orders. He knows where they live"

She had never seen Clark so terrified in her life. What could he hear that was so terrible?

He abruptly did something much unexpected, "We have to go, right now." He took her hand gently and dragged her behind him sprinting down the steps, no longer caring about the importance of stealth.

"Clark," She had to contain herself from shouting. "Wait, stop. I haven't even got a story yet-"

"_BANG_!" Lois covered her ears. _What was that? A gun shot_?

"They know that we're here. Lois, run please go!" He begged. There was just enough light to see his blue eyes. Clearly he knew something she didn't, and against all of her reporter's instincts, for the first time in her life, _she_ obeyed Clark.

"_BANG! BANG! BANG_!"

Lois raced down the stirs alone, but the light was just too insignificant for her to take any notice of the missing step that had rotten away.

She groaned as she fell flat of her face on the landing of the second flight of stairs. This was not a good day for heals. Her ankle twisted backwards as she cried out in pain.

"_BANG! BANG!" _The gunshots were getting closer. The cursing and shouting of voices became louder. Whatever Clark had attempted to do to distract them, had failed.

Adrenaline had taken over her body at this point, forcing herself to try and slide down the stairs on her hands and knees.

Footsteps rushed after her, she wanted to call out for help, _his_ help.

She wailed as one of the men had grabbed her wavy, brown hair forcing her to stop progressing towards the door.

"Tie her up in the car," One of the deep, growling voices had instructed to the other.

Lois tried to glance up at the appearances of her captors, but they were both dressed in night black clothing, blending in with the rest of the darkness. The only identification she got from either one of men was the green, glowing meteorite rocks they wore as rings on their fingers. All hope of Superman coming to her rescue drained out of her, as she gazed up in sadness at the Kryptonite.

"Clark!" She shouted desperately as she struggled and squirmed at the man trying to tie her hands together.

"_WHAM_!"

The firm grasp on her hair had suddenly been let go. Lois peered up the stairs. There was Clark, who had apparently hurled the man into the cement wall. He got up dizzily and dazed, but concentrated on Clark and struck a soft punch. It brought Clark down to the floor instantly. He whammed a few more kicks into Clark's side before she could watch no longer. She stopped squirming and let both men bind her wrists. She couldn't bear to let Clark take any more pain. He was just too innocent for that. She went along easily with what they wanted her to do. Maybe if they let them take her without any problems, Clark would get away to find help. They brought her to her feet and she was forced to limp across the floor losing both of her shoes.

"Clark!" She cried out again. Hoping that would get him on his feet and to the police.  
She let out a small sob of helplessness when one of the men struck her across the face. They forced her head down and inside a rusty blue car parked outside the warehouse, light from the afternoon sun flooded her eyes as they adjusted from the dark.

She sat quietly with her thoughts for a few moments, everything had happened so quickly. One minute she had been staring into Clark Kent's magical eyes, the next, the thought was passing through her mind that he might actually be…

No, not Clark. She couldn't think that way, not now. He was _fine_ and she needed to concentrate on getting herself out of the car. For her fiancé, for Jason…and if there was any hope in helping him, Clark.

She didn't have any explanation in her mind for what these men wanted with her. Perhaps just as a nosy reporter that had heard too much and needed to be dealt with accordingly. Or maybe, what panicked Clark in the warehouse had something to do with her. After all she and Luthor did have _history_. Thoughts of panic whizzed through her mind. If they could catch her with such ease, their next target would be Jason. She knew that this time she would have to save herself. Even if Superman did come to her rescue again, the glowing green Kryptonite rings they wore wouldn't even let him get near the car.

Tears of shock and fear pricked at her eyes, but she could show no sign of weakness now. Her blurred vision showed her the picture of the warehouse slowly moving further and further away. The two men jet into high gear and sped down the street. She wriggled her fingers, the only free parts of her hands.

"_SCCRREEECCHH_!"

The tires of the car came to a complete break. She felt her entire body jerking backwards and her head smashed off the back window. She held a tight grasp on her consciousness to make out what had stopped the zooming vehicle in its tracks.

"What the hell!?" The driver shouted in frustration as he opened the car door. And just as he did, he and the door flew off backwards and landed onto a parked car nearby. Setting off the security alarm.

A hint of joy spread into her heart, _The siren…the police…_

Her thought process was very mild from the jolt, making her weak and drowsy.

"Lois,"

Two warm arms of salvation wrapped around her body, lifting her safely out of the car.  
Her eyes fluttered open in a foggy haze, "Clark?" She muttered softly as she gazed up…into those familiar, kind and comforting...blue eyes.

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**Heheh, this is just the beginning of Lois's troubles. Wanna see what happens next? Please review! If not enough people review I won't have as much inspiration to make this story a success!**


	2. Three men, one girl

**Yay! Thank you all so much for all the inspiring reviews! Same warning about grammar errors in this chapter… but I hope you enjoy it anyway!  
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**_Chapter 2 Three men, one girl_**

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"Thanks Clark…" Lois spoke shakily and unsteady as Clark passed the hand- warming mug, carrying her favorite familiar scent, her fourth cup of coffee.

"I'm so sorry you got wrapped up in all this Lois," He apologized for the fifth time. " I--I didn't intend on anyone actually being up there, I thought it was just a rat or something…if I had known you would become so hurt..."

"It's alright Clark," She couldn't understand why he would even begin to blame himself. "It's not like it was your fault." She smiled to herself;_ He's so much like Jason._

"Are you sure you won't let me take you to the hospital Lois?"

"For what Clark? I'm a little bruised and beaten up, but I'll be okay."

"You hit your head pretty hard…"

She let his warm concerning feelings wash all over her cut and battered aching body. He'd offered to take her to the hospital as soon as he rescued her from car, but she refused to see a doctor, she didn't want to worry Jason or Richard over her 'minor injuries.'  
He'd been quick to grab a cab and carry her home, all afternoon he'd waited on her hand and foot, fluffing her pillow, running out to the store to buy Advil, he'd even offered to go pick up Jason. She tried to convince him to get home and take care of himself, but he insisted she not be alone and would stay until Richard got back.

His clothes were ripped and torn, and the right side of his spectacles had shattered, he had bruises all down his chest, which she could tell were causing him great pain.

"As long as I'm conscious, I'll be fine."

"Mommy," Jason's tiny voice peeped up from the kitchen. "Could you help me with my picture?"

She began to stand up off the couch where Clark had made sure she stay put to rest, "I'll help him Lois don't worry. You just stay put." He pointed at her playfully.  
He strolled along merrily into the kitchen where Lois could hear their delighted voices.

"Golly Jason, what's Superman doing in here with you?"

Jason laughed at Clark's teasing "Silly, it's just my drawing."

"Oh wow, it looks so much like him; I thought he'd flown straight into the kitchen!" Clark marveled over Jason's magnificent work of art.

Lois grinned to herself as she pulled over the woolly red blanket Clark had fetched from the attic. She had believed it to be lucky and was only to be used when she was sick, she remembered this was first blanket she had ever bought for Jason when she found out she was pregnant. It had kept her warm on so many lonely nights; she loved and embraced the color, for at the time she couldn't get enough of any big red blanket…

"You okay Lois?" Clark called from the kitchen, keeping an eye on her so she stay planted on the couch.

"Fine Clark…" She couldn't even remember the last time she'd been forced to take a rest; she was Lois Lane, always on the go, no time for a breather. Her family and job depended too much on her to stop halfway.  
She recalled the last time she'd caught a cold…

"The newsroom really needs you honey," Richard had said, trying to persuading her to force herself out of bed when even the doctor recommended she deserved a break.

"Can you suck it up for a few days?"

In the last five years Richard had never taken care of her like Clark Kent had done in a mere few hours. He treated Lois as if she was something more…valuable. However, she was _Lois Lane_, ace reporter and a Super-mom; she didn't need to be specially treated like a delicate queen, or…did she?

Everything had felt so… perfect since Clark had assisted her home. Like a twisted but longing dream hidden in the back of her subconscious mind that at had last come true.

The way Clark was accepted by Jason so quickly, the way he had rescued her out of the car, holding her gently like a golden piece of treasure, and the way his sparkling blue eyes made her feel so incredibly warm inside.

She shook her head violently, what was she thinking? Getting _another_ man involved in her life was the last thing she needed.

"Lois," Clark said quietly, thinking she had drifted into a slumber. "There's a call from Richard on your message machine, he said… uh, he'd be working very late tonight." Clark seemed uncomfortable delivering her this news,

"He sounded really worried about you Lois, since we disappeared from the 'Planet' this morning…maybe you should give him a call--"

"No," she replied quickly. She knew he would be upset that she refused to go to the hospital. Then he would fire up and start raging on about how undependable Superman was and how he wouldn't always be there for her every time she tripped. She had heard that speech from him a thousand times, and she didn't particularly feel like being hollered at with all her pain. _Clark_ wouldn't yell at her, he was too much of gentleman to even think of such a hostile act. She only wanted to hold on to this moment, the perfect family, the perfect son, and a man she had always dreamed of by her side, for a while longer.

"I mean," she regained her senses quickly. "If he has stay out so late he must have a lot of work to do, I don't want disturb him."

Clark nodded shyly and didn't press the subject.

"Clark," she called out hesitantly. "Would you do me a big favor?"

"Of course, anything you need Lois."

"I just want you to, not say anything about what happened today to Richard..."

He raised his eyebrows curiously at her. "I'm not sure if that's such a good idea--"

"Please Clark I just," she searched her emotions for the right words,

_  
I'm trying to avoid him because I'm afraid he won't understand? No.  
I'm afraid he won't even care about me and use this chance to gloat about how much of a better man he was compared to Superman? No.  
I'm afraid to lose this feeling of heavenly happiness I haven't felt since the day I met Superman? Definitely not._

"I don't want to him to be so concerned about me that it'll distract him from his work, and from Jason." _Bingo._

Clark looked at her disapprovingly, but realized she had her reasons.

"Alright Lois, I won't tell Richard." She breathed a sigh of relief, but her stomach ruined the peaceful moment by grumbling and echoing off the walls as she flushed rosy red with embarrassment.

Clark's eyes lit up with amusement "Hungry?"

* * *

"Clark, I was thinking a happy meal at McDonalds or something." She was astounded with Clark's generosity by treating both Lois and Jason to one of the most expensive restaurants in Metropolis.

"Oh--well you know, I just thought after everything that happened today, you deserved this."

"Wow, Mr. Clark you must be rich to be able to eat here every night!" Jason gazed around in wonder at all fancy lights and decorations hanging from the ceiling above.

Clark laughed uneasily "Unfortunately this kind of thing only happens to me about…once a year"

Jason's face lit up as he flipped through the menu, "Mommy look at all the cakes and ice cream! There must be a hundred different kinds."  
The entire meal was carried out joyously in Lois's opinion. It was one of those happy Kodak moments that could have been published with the heading 'perfect family.'

She couldn't even remember the last time Richard had taken them out to such an elaborate diners, let alone a co-worker.

"I've been meaning to ask you something all day," She said taking a sip of her wine.

"What was it you heard today?" She lowered her voice to blend in with all the chattering going on around other tables.

He cleared his throat. "Um, heard Lois?"

"You know, in the warehouse, it seemed to…I don't know 'spook' you."

He shifted uncomfortably in his chair "Oh well, not that much. Just uh…uh, a few things about how Lex was going to be disappointed if they didn't…acquire something."

She nodded intensely studding his nervous face, "Any details on what Lex wanted them to find?"  
"No, no, not really…then one of them said they heard our footsteps outside, that's pretty much all."

She left it alone, although she could not get over the panic she had seen in Clark's face while listening in…

"Clark, why don't we split the cheque?" She knew Clark was low on money; he was just able to find an affordable apartment a few weeks ago. Her eyes practically popped out her head when she saw the rather large number on the tiny piece of paper.

"N-no Lois, don't worry I've got it…" He began searching his dirty and worn clothes for his wallet, Lois had offered him a pair of Richard old jeans and shirts but he refused to change, afraid he was imposing.

"Clark really it's no trouble," Lois had suggested again after a few minutes of Clark digging through his pockets without luck.

"Lois," He said deeply "I can't find my wallet."

"Oh well, no problem Clark I'm sure you probably lost it when you were at our house. I'll just pay and help you look when we get back."

His face turned very dark, "Lois…I think I lost it when…we were at the investigating the warehouse."

Just hearing such an idea made her blood run cold. A wallet would have everything, identification, his address, his phone number, where he worked, his whole life could be found inside such a tiny case of leather.

"I'll pay Clark, let's go and have a look at my house." _And pray that it's suck just between the couch cushions…_

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**Uh-oh, now not only is Superman in danger, but so is Clark! I know you're all wondering when the big dramatizing moment is coming for Lois, but you'll have to wait until the next chapter for that! Please keep giving me reviews and telling me what you think ! They make me always want to write faster!  
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	3. It’s not fair

**Yay, Thank you for all the great reviews. Hope you enjoy the next chapter.  
Warning: Beware of intense grammar issues.**

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**_Chapter 3: It's not fair_**

"Clark!" The sound of his own name made him jump out of his chair.

"Wow, someone's on edge today." Jimmy Olsen stood with an amused grin on his face.

"Of course I would be too, after what happened to you and Lois yesterday."

"Uh, yeah…just a little tense." He stumbled out. "Well at least Lois seems cheerful this morning."

Yesterday had been a disaster in Clark's eyes. After his little panic attack at the restaurant, Lois took it upon herself to search the entire house seeking out his missing wallet, but her efforts were in vain. Clark went back to the warehouse that night to search for the wallet with his X-ray vision, but had no luck, _they_ could have all of "Clark Kent's" information right now. A dreading feeling crept over him as he thought about the tiny photo of Lois and Jason he thought would have been safe in his wallet. He would have to stay completely inconspicuous for the next while.

And if Luther did have his wallet, well… he preferred to put it bluntly, Clark was screwed.  
But one thing that day did play in Clark's favor; he recalled the speeding car yesterday where Lois had been taken. He remembered the seconds ticking by before they would reach Lex. Even with the lasting pain from the effects of the Kryptonite, Clark forced himself to get to his feet. The next second he remembered seizing the bumper yanking the car backwards to a complete stop. And even when he had hurled the door across street, Lois still hadn't asked any questions about her rescue. She hadn't bothered to investigate how exactly a stuttering news geek had been able to toss a two hundred pound man into the air and stop a speeding car.

But what was really nagging his mind was when he had overheard Luther's men discussing in the warehouse.The thought that chilled him the most was that they knew where his family lived. How?  
It stayed with him all through the night. He would have to keep a watchful eye on Lois now, Luther would attempt to try and kidnap her again, 'bait' was the word they had used for Superman. It was ridiculously low, even for Luther. What Clark wanted more than anything to do right now was to fly Lois, Jason and even Richard out of Metropolis. Or at least go beat the shit out of Luther.

But neither one would work, Lois being to stubborn to leave, and not having any idea where Luther was hiding now. It was without a doubt Luther would abandon the warehouse now that two nosey reporters had sniffed him out. His plan wouldn't work; he could expose Luther but then what? The police would be no help if even Superman didn't know where he had coward off too.  
And to make things worse, he had promised to stay with Lois until Richard had come home, but an earthquake had forced him to take his leave early.

Clark's life was slowly falling down hill, _everything_ had gone wrong.

"Why didn't you tell me you were going down there?" Clark's miserable trepidation's were interrupted by two hollering voices across the newsroom.

"You knew you were playing into Luther's hands!"

"Richard this is my job!"

"Your job is not worth your life Lois!"

"It's not like had meant for any of this to happen--"

"You are a reporter Lois, I would have figured you would have the sense to realize now that you can't just go put your life in danger and hope like hell _he_ comes to save your sorry ass!"

For the first time in years, the newsroom went dead silent. No typing keyboards, no endless phone ring tones, no Perry blaring about how the front page had a spelling error. Nothing…and all eyes gawked at Richard and Lois in the back corner.

"Enjoying the show?" Richard announced to all the gazing eyes.  
Lois said nothing; she refused to look up from ground shamefully as she walked briskly out of the room.

"Uh…Richard, in…my office…" Perry said with bewilderment as his tone.

Slowly but surely the volume level began to turn up, but only with whispering gossip and anxious looks.Clark was tempted to go after Lois, he wanted to help her. He wanted to see her smiling like last night, but she didn't want Clark Kent's help, she wanted _his._.

_Just a few minutes…just a few minutes with her on the roof couldn't hurt…_he decided.

He quietly crept out of the room and waited patently for the elevator where he would transform out of his nerdy masquerade.

"Clark…?" A sniffling voice called as the elevator doors unfastened.

"L-Lois," She had tears streaming down her blushing face. "Oh, I'm sorry I'll just wait for the next one."

"No, no, it's alright." She said wiping her face with her sleeve. "I was just heading up for some fresh air. Clark…would you um..."  
She crossed her arms on her chest and stared shyly at the floor. "Would you come with me?"

He was completely taken aback, it occurred to him that _Clark_ would be the last person she wanted to see right now.

"Uh…are you sure Lois?" He said apprehensively when he slowly stepped inside the elevator.

She nodded. Only a few awkward seconds of silence hung between them before Lois couldn't keep her sobs bottled up.

"Lois, I know it's not my place or anything to ask," He approached gently "But what happened in there?"

"Oh Clark,_ he_ happened."

"Oh..."

"Richard and I have fought like that every day since he came back. But we've _never_ let it interfere with our work before."

Clark was surprised how open she was towards him "I g-guess Richard found out about yesterday huh?"

It became clear to him now why she was so desperate wanted to keep it secrete.Clark would never dream of harassing Lois like that.

"Perry blabbed, but I don't blame him. It's not fair Clark; I should be able to tell everything to the one I love right?"

Clark wanted nothing more at that moment then to wrap his arms around her and say how she could tell _him _anything.  
"I'm sorry, I'm just ranting now. None of this not your problem. I'm sorry--"  
She staggered off the elevator as soon as the doors sprung open and headed out onto the roof.

"L-Lois," he stammered hurrying after her. She turned around with her red puffy eyes filled with hope.  
"You _should_ be able to tell the…the one you love everything. It's really…not fair."

And to his astonishment, she ran straight into his arms.

"Clark, he scared me. For the first time I really thought Richard was going to hurt me." She trembled with fright.

Clark was so mystified that she had took such comfort in his arms.

"Lois--you know that he would never…" He couldn't bring himself to tell another lie, truth be told for a brief moment, he didn't exactly know what Richard was going to do.

His stomach lurched with guilt, being with her like this. Her fiancé was waiting right downstairs, she wasn't his, she never did belong to him, and she never would. It was just _not fair._

"Clark your such a good friend to me. Last night when you were with Jason, he was so happy. Richard barely ever looks at Jason anymore. I think I might--" She shifted as she spoke. "Might have to break it off with Richard."

She looked up at Clark.

"But I-I need to know that at least you'll stick by me Clark. Perry will have my head, and Jason…how can I ever explain this to him? I need someone Clark. I need _someone_ to stay around."

She held him close; Clark was utterly lost for words.

"Yeah…don't worry Lois, _I'll_ always be around."

She didn't say anything else, she gently rubbed his shoulders with gratitude and dragged her feet back inside.

* * *

No one spoke to Lois as she took the walk of shame back to her desk. Clark sighed, Lois's life was falling apart beneath her feet. Richard had no idea what he was about to lose, Clark found himself actually afraid of how he could react. He could take it like a man and try to work things out, or he could take it our on Lois and Jason. 

"Clark Kent right?" An unfamiliar voice startled him, when he turned around he saw four male figures that were new to his eyes. They dressed intelligently like businessmen, Clark had assumed they were probably here to discuss something with Perry.

"Uh y-yes. That would be me, can I help you"

The first shortest man in front of him spoke cold but with a trace of innocence. "Actually yes, Clark dose this happen to belong to you?"  
He reached inside his pocket and pulled out what could have stopped Clark's heart.  
In his palm, lay a black leather wallet.

They knew, they knew _everything_. And they found him.  
He tried not to panic, but he had to alert Perry.

"Perry, would you come have a look at this, these men seem to have found a--"

"**BANG! BANG**!"

Screams of panic filled the room, everyone dropped down under desks, chairs anything for cover.  
The second man had pulled out a gun, and harmlessly shot the ceiling for attention.

"What the hell is going on?" Perry exploded out of his office.  
The third man reveled two more guns, one pointed at Perry and the other directly aimed at Clark.

"Lois…Lane." Clark's heart dropped, when the first gunman announced her name.  
He prayed silently she wouldn't show herself and remain safely hidden.

"LOIS LANE!" He walked towards Clark pressed the gun right up against Clark's chest.What could he do? His mind raced for a solution, he couldn't just walk away, he couldn't fight them, he couldn't do anything. For the first time in Clark's life, _he_ was the one who was helpless.

"Yes…" Lois peeped up.

_No._

One of the men grabbed her arm and dragged her up beside Clark.

"Don't hurt-" he began.

"Clark, you're a smart man. You are reporter, and probably a damn good one at that. But you're nosey, and the world has no need for men who can't mind their own business." The first one said as he paced around the room.

"But since you're so smart. You'll be able to figure out pretty easily that we really don't need you." He gestured towards Lois. "But we do need _her_."

Clark took in a breath as the men with the gun pointed so close to his chest backed two steps away.

"So then, we'll just do this now and get it over with."

Clark closed his eyes, this was it. His secrete would be out for the world.  
The next few seconds were a blur, everything had happened so fast. Clark didn't even remember hearing the sounds of the two bullet shots. However what he did remember seeing was the one person who he loved most die right in front of his eyes.

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**Life's not fair, not even for a Superhero :( Anyway, --bows down on hands and knees-- PLEASE Review!**


	4. Still not good enough

**Next chapter up and ready for reviewing! But first, I would like to clear up a few things. The reviews concerned me that perhaps I left too much of a cliffhanger at the end of the last chapter. With a few reviews regarding the supposable "death" of Lois Lane. But I guess that means I've done my job as a writer. Well here's to a surprise (I'm actually no where near evil enough to kill off such an important character…hopefully --just teasing--) This chapters a little shorter than usual, but as they say short but sweet.  
So if you proceed to read ahead the next chapter, I think your sprits will be somewhat uplifted. But then squashed again by the end…oh well. I wish you good luck on this emotional roller coaster I've created for you! Oh and beware of grammar errors, they tend to bite. O.o…**

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_Chapter 4: Still not good enough_**

She felt her chest slowly rising up and down as she gradually faded out of the depths of confusion when her consciousness began returning, like the sun clearing away fog after a rainstorm.

She basked in the _warmth_ that soothed her soul and body, from a heavenly presence hovering over her as a guardian angel.

"Clark…?" her voice was raspy and she coughed as she attempted to speak.

"Sorry to disappoint you." A deep, rich tone responded.

She leisurely flipped open her eyelids, the bright florescent lights burned her eyes as she stared figure suspended above her. To her relief it wasn't Richard who heard her guilty call, but it was _him_. Her lips formed a smile, she was too weak to move and not even a twitch could enter he body without a shock of fiery pain, but she had the _will_ and need to jump up into his arms.

"How did--" she choked on her words. "…you know I was here."

"I told you I was always around."

She scanned her surroundings, a hospital was never pleasant. Plain white, pasty walls, strange foreign machines attached to every angle of her body, and the vile unfashionable gown she was forced to dress in, against her every fashion instinct.Not to mention the scratchy, vomit reeking bed sheets she lay buried in.

But none of that mattered when she had _him_ by her side, the world could be ending outside her door and she couldn't have been less at peace.

"Clark Kent." She always felt awkward discussing him around her hero. "Is he safe?"

"The fellow with the glasses?…He's just fine."

She breathed a sigh a relief as pain seized through her chest and down her arms.

"Lois," She had been afraid this was coming. "Why…? Why did you risk everything for him?"

She swallowed and recollected the events that had led her to a hospital room.  
Clark standing there with that lost puppy dog look on his face, Lois couldn't imagine how anyone could hurt a person like him.  
She wouldn't stand for it; her heart wouldn't watch him lay in her position. Her soul made a decision at that moment, and at the very last second of time, she stepped in front of Clark.

"Clark's my friend, he doesn't deserve pain. He's too innocent."

He gently rubbed her hand. "You're a very brave woman Miss Lane and…" he dipped his head down not daring to look her straight in the eyes. "I'm so sorry…I can't even _begin_ to tell you how sorry I am."

Her eyes widened "No, no, no! None of this was your fault! This was _my_ choice, and I don't regret it."

He looked up at her as shadow of grief passed over his face while his eyes were swimming with agony.

"It…it's not like there was anything you could have done…" She said gently attempting to uplift his dreary mood.  
"The bullets, the doctors told me they were made of the meteorite rocks."

His head shot upwards. "Kryptonite?"

She nodded. "Luther's prepared. All his men are armed with Kryptonite"

He opened his mouth to respond but she cut him off.

"Don't do anything _stupid_."

He leaned closer and whispered in the most delicate voice she'd ever heard him speak.

"I just want to protect you."

She closed her eyes as she felt his warm soothing lips pressed up against hers. For what tranquil moment only lasted a few seconds before her heart quivered at the next sound to reach her ears.

"Mommy? Why are you kissing Superman?"

Superman backed away, and to her horror Richard and Jason stood in the doorway, Richard looking pale and his mouth gaping open.

"Get out." Richard shoved his son aside and marched towards Superman, looking at him directly in the eyes.

"Leave her alone. How dare you try and take advantage of Lois in her fragile condition! GET OUT!" Richard had lost it.

"Daddy, please don't yell at Superman--"

"Shut up Jason!"

Lois watched from afar while her son's face formed into despair.

"Richard don't…your just tired…please…" She was too weak to summon up another word.

Richard stared at her in disbelief, "After everything that's happened Lois, I would have thought by now you --"

He paused and turned towards her hero. "Why are you still standing here? Aren't there a million other people you could be with right now?"

"No don't--" Lois couldn't watch without tears clouding her vision.

"Lois! _I'm _your fiancé remember?"

Superman glanced at Lois, his eyes reassuring her that he'd be near by, and then took his leave out the moonlit window.  
Lois found herself nervous to be left alone with Richard, and her baby crying in the corner.

"You get kidnapped and shot all within forty-eight hours and you still can't see the completely unreliability in him! Why am I not good enough for you Lois? Is it because I don't save the world? I may not fly around in a red cape but I save your world Lois! _I_ provide you with a roof over your head, _I_ paid for that big cozy house you come home to every night, and _I_ even raised his soon for the past five years when _he_ abandoned you!"

He paused to catch his breath. "What has he ever done to support you Lois? He wasn't there when you were pregnant. _I_ was! What is it that he can do for you that _I_ can't?"

"Mr. White, I'm going to have to ask you to please leave!" An elderly nurse had come to her rescue escorting them both out of her room. Richard yanking Jason away from the tiny grasp on his mother's arm.

Lois desperately wanted to go after her baby, but she barley had the strength to breath.

After letting a few wet tears drip down her face, she turned over and let the lack of strength, and darkness of sleep consume her soul.

* * *

**XD Don't worry all, Lois is safe and sound…for now. Mwahahaha!…-ahem-  
I know most of you out there probably really favor Richards's character and I've read some very well done fan-fics where he plays the understanding type of guy. I have to admit, Richard really is a great guy. But we all know he doesn't measure up to Superman. So in this fic, I wanted to give the audience a new taste and glance at Richards's darker side. I mean, in real life, how would most guys react when they found out the last five years of their lives have been a waste and handed over to another man? Just wanted to announce my outlook on Richard, but I still think he's great. Anyway, --worships the readers-- Please review and feel free to tell me your out look on everything so far!**


	5. Wooly Red Blanket

**Here is the next chapter, it is very fluffy…**

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* * *

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**_Chapter 5: Wooly Red Blanket_**

"Thanks Miss." Clark said to the cashier as he took the bulging bouquet of red roses from the gift store stand.

If could afford it he would have bought ten truck loads of roses for Lois, but just to buy one bouquet would mean he would have to skip out on lunch for a week.

But not even a world of roses could ever fully apologize for what Clark had done.  
It was hard last night to face Lois as Superman, but to confront her as Clark would be even more difficult.

He had not been satisfied with the answer Lois had given him on why she had saved his life. After all he was an _office co-worker_, how common was it for a human to jump in front of a gun for a person they would occasionally walk by, or give a brief nod of existence towards?

Maybe he wasn't _just_ a co-worker anymore. Clark couldn't forget the astonishment he felt when Lois wanted his presence on the roof and not _his._

The way she fell into his arms, and talked so unrestrictedly towards him, that soft side of Lois was usually only to be unleashed in the company of Superman.

The suspicion rolled around in Clark's mind as he walked the path of doom to Lois's hospital room. He wasn't looking forward to this at all; his mind began to spin searching for the right words. You could only use the parse 'I'm sorry' so many times before it began to feel empty.

"You should have seen him Miss. Lane, he went crazy! It was like he was Hercules or something. All four of those guys went flying into the wall! Well… Perry wasn't too pleased with the damage but the whole office was amazed at Clark's sudden strength. It's too bad you blacked out, Clark was a real hero"

"A-hem…" Clark stood in the doorway listening to Jimmy Olsen refresh Lois's mind of the miracle strength he'd been able to show off yesterday.

Lois's face amused and taken aback turned towards his direction, and grinned.

"Ah, so the hero arrives with nothing more to give than a poorly wrapped bouquet of flowers." Jimmy chuckled.

_Drat, I was really hoping Lois wouldn't remember any of that…_

It was true, he had gone a bit 'crazy' as he watched his world crumble at his feet, but it was his impulse to save Lois that had took over. He had very mildly hurled all four of Luther's goons into the wall, and one even out the window…

He had reassured the curious reporters of the newsroom that his sudden ability of muscle was caused by nothing more than panic and fear for Lois. The police had arrived shortly after Clark had flown Lois to the hospital to be treated.

Watching her lay frail and fragile made his heart ache. And now having gained the knowledge that the bullets that had pierced Lois's precious body had actually been forged out of his one true weakness was almost too much for him to endure. This should have been _his_ fate, it should have been _him_ in the hospital bed, it should have been _him_ bearing the pain, not Lois.

"I…I-I, just wanted to make sure you were alright…" He stumbled timidly.

"Don't worry Clark, Lois is a tough camper. She was saying how she was going to get right back onto a new project after she gets better." Jimmy reassured.

"Come on in Clark." She motioned for him to step out of the doorway.

"Well, I better get going Miss. Lane. The office really misses you and hopes you get better real soon."

"Thanks Jimmy, tell Perry to save me a good story."

Jimmy nodded as he left the room leaving Clark and Lois gracelessly alone.

"Lois I-"

"Save it Clark, I've really had enough sympathetic's for one day."

He stared down at the white tiled floor, embarrassed as he set aside the flowers with the pile of get-well cards signed from various names at the office.

"I brought you something"

She laughed weakly. "If it's another 'get-well' or 'we miss you' card, you might as well shoot me again Clark."

His ears were massaged at the sound of her laugh and her good old reporter's sarcasm bubbling out of her misery.

"No, it's something a little more useful…" Clark revealed the 'good luck' red, wool blanket out from his briefcase, Lois gasped with delight.

"Clark…thank you. This really means a lot for you to bring this to me." She cuddled the blanket like a small child, he found her contentment comforting.

"I know you don't want to hear it Lois, but I _have_ to say it. _I'm so sorry_." Clark walked meekly over to Lois's bedside.

"…Just, why Lois?" His brain just couldn't comprehend that she would be willing to throw away everything just for Clark Kent to breath a little longer.

"There was no reason for you to--"

"No reason Clark?" She said sternly.

"Well I mean…you could have _died_ Lois. You would have left Jason…Richard--"

"Clark, I know what I was risking. But it was worth it, I couldn't--I _wouldn't_ let you die Clark. I would have regretted it for the rest of my life if you got hurt"

"But _why_?"

"Because Clark I lov--"She cupped her hand over her mouth and bit her tongue.

Clark found himself utterly dumbfounded and at the mercy of her words. The only thing his brain could mange to find out of the clutter was a simple "_What?_"

Lois lowered her gaze and sealed her face away within her curls and muttered quietly,

"You've always been there for me, more than Richard ever could be. You're more than a good friend to me. I can't lose you..."

Clark didn't react; he just stared dorkishly at her.

"Please say _something_ Clark."

He didn't know what to say. She'd _actually_ fallen for both sides of the ultimate man.

"But I thought you were in love with--"

"I am! And that's the worst part of it! I do love Superman, but I can't ever know him! I know you Clark, you've always been the same. Everything's always been so easy and simple between us. And I loved watching you with Jason, and I even love your ridiculously adorable "Golly and Gosh" farm boy talk!"

She found herself panting after her unleashing her hearts deepest desires.

"I…was going to say…Richard..."

Lois didn't reply, her face began to turn red and her body stated to shiver. Her chest rose up and down gasping for air.

"Lois? Are you alright?" Clark said as he automatically letting his overly protective senses take over.

"I…can't…" she struggled to breath.

"Lois?" Clark he rose to his feet to scan her body. "I'll get the doctor."

Her hand grabbed his wrist and her eyes begged him to stay.

"Lois I've got to get you help."

Clark's deeper voice commanded for attention as he called for a nurse.

"Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to leave immediately." One of the three doctors that had arrived said hastily.

"But-but I--"

"Sir please step out into the waiting room."

Clark looked at Lois and obeyed, he knew he would only be a distraction.  
There was nothing he could do now.

"Clark!" He looked away from his daze.

"Richard?" He said as he saw the frightened struck man running down the hall towards Lois's room.

"Wait, Lois is having some kind of…attack..."

Richard slammed the wall with his fists. "Great, that's all we need right now!"

"Richard," Clark said cautiously "What's wrong?"

"It's Jason…he's run away."

* * *

**So how did you like that? Another short chapter. I'll have the next up by Thursday or Friday. Sorry about cliffhanger…mwahaha. OH! Please please please please please please please please please please review!**


	6. The number five

**Hello! I have some saddening news. I'm going away for two weeks to Florida and this will be my last chapter until I come back on the 26th. Just in time before school starts. The good news is, we'll be driving for more than 12 hours, plus there is the three hour flight so I'll have lots of time to write this fanfic! I'll have so many chapters for you guys with so many new ideas for this fic! I absolutely can't wait, then when I come back all I'll have to do is type them all out for you. And it's right around the beginning of school so when you come home from a depressing day you'll at least have one lasting fanfic here. Lol. Oh well I'm just looking on the sunny side.  
Oh and another note: I'm going to warn you readers about Richards character in this, as I have said before, he's revealing a lot of his darker side. And in this chapter, he is very dark. So please don't flame me based on his character alone. (Believe me, it pains me to make him so evil.) But it was either this, or kill him off. And I believe that idea was already used in a few other fanfic. So, it's just a warning, but please give it a chance.**

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* * *

_Chapter six: The Number five _**

It took four doctors to hold back Lois's constant rage filled punches, kicking and squirming. It was the third time that night she had tried to escape from the hospital, and the third time the sedating needle was jabbed into her arm.

The hospital staff was furious at Richard for delivering such disturbing news of the disappearance of her son when she was in such a delicate state.

Every few hours the effects of the drug would wear off and she would wake up with a new plan of escape in her thoughts.

It was the rage that drove her. The rage, despair and loss of her only child. And the haunting thought of Jason's weeping face lost and alone in the depths of Metropolis. Her mind was dangerously close to snapping from the stress and misery of the week's dealings. The only thought concerning her now was to break free of her prison.

The waterworks hadn't stopped since Richard's visit. Not even when Superman had made a midnight appearance at her window.

"I swear to you Lois, I won't rest until I find Jason." He promised as her squeezed her hand giving her reassurance. The words echoed in her head, she had to trust and rely on him now more than ever.

But Richard's statement had left her unsettled throughout the night. _"You get kidnapped and shot all within forty-eight hours and you still can't see the complete unreliability in him!"_

No, Superman had never failed her before.

It had been her own stupid mistake the day she told Richard about her son's true father, things between them had never been the same since. He even began to avoid Jason and glare at his coloring pictures of the hero.

Nevertheless, he didn't leave. He suck by her, and still claimed to still love Jason.

The event with Clark that morning had been shoved to the back of Lois's mind. Although blurting out her dark and dirty desires _was_ playing with her heart.

She was informed that her loss of breath during the episode had been caused from the deep wound in her chest. She needed to remain calm or she could cause internal damage her lungs.

But being calm in her predicament would not be possible.

The doctors had even threatened her that if she didn't get the rest she needed she would be transported to the hospital in Smallville.

Now she had been forced to wait and let the hours creep by. Three days, had eventually inched away at the speed of a snail. Three days without Richard, Superman or even Clark.

They were all out looking for Jason of course, but they had left her for three days of confined solitude.

* * *

Another hopeless night. He'd searched the entire city and didn't _see_ or _hear_ any trace of Jason's existence.  
He'd been seeking him for three straight days and abandoning his job, but that was the least of Clark's concerns.

Lois was left in intense care, Lex Luther had sent a death party for Clark, his only son was missing, and the loving husband Lois claims Richard to be, has sworn revenge against Superman.

The very thought of her fiancé made him clench his fists as he recalled Richards suspicion.

"I think someone is with him." Richard has suggested to Clark before revealing the tragic news to Lois.

"You mean kidnapped Jason? Who?"

"Superman"

Clark fell silent.

"Jason wouldn't just leave by himself, someone must have tricked him into it. Who else would have any reason to kidnap him?"

Easy guess.

Clark was outraged that anyone could even suggest that he would kidnap his own son.  
He wasn't one of those angry fathers that would use his child to get back against the other parent. He wasn't a villain. He wasn't Lex Luther.

All signs around Clark told him to pack it in. Jason _couldn't_ be in Metropolis, Clark hadn't heard or seen any signs of Jason, Luther, or frankly any suspicious gangs anywhere near the area.

He decided to make a quick pit stop at his apartment. Maybe Luther had finally seen through the masquerade and was keeping Jason hostage. Any possibility or flicker of hope had to be explored.

He flew in the open window on the top floor of the cheap termite inhabited room, and cautiously gazed around as a shadow of shock revealed itself on Clark's face.

The entire room had been trashed.

Tables and chairs overturned, mirrors shattered, shards of glass scattered everywhere throughout the floor, furniture stuffing ripped open, they had completely bombarded Clark's apartment.

"_Crunch._" He shattered another piece of debris below his foot; he hesitantly bent down to pick up what had once been a happy memory for Clark. Now it lay in a broken frame and ripped down the middle. It revealed itself as a tiny school photo of Jason.

* * *

Good behavior, that was the key. Good behavior after wailing and cursing was what got Lois the ticket to her freedom. The staff realized if she had so much energy to knock out a two hundred pound male with a single punch, she'd be more than well enough to be released from the hospital a few days early.

Her eyes scanned the dirty unchild friendly city streets. Even with the police and her own guardian of the city investigating from the skies, she couldn't help it but join the search party for Jason herself.

The moment she lifted herself off that hospital bed, she was behind the wheel with Richard as her partner in crime.

Silence hung between the couple. Not even a sniffle or sigh was dared to be released. Lois's eyes darted outside the window while still trying to keep a glance on the road.

"Lois…I know I've been really short tempered with everything…" He expected her to give him the death stare of an agreement but didn't even give him a noticing glimpse that she was listening.

"And I don't have any excuses for my behavior. I just really hope you can…forgive me. Lois I really--"

"It's fine Richard. Let's just concentrate on finding Jason." She'd been trying to avoid any contact with Richard, but she really did need his help right now. And Jason would come before any sort of marital problems they could ever have.

After five painstaking hours of silence and no luck, Lois pulled over and dropped Richard off at the corner.

"I have to go into work for a minute."

"What? Lois this is not the time to worry about your work!"

"Richard I'm not going to actually _work_, just need to…pick up a few things."

She could have sworn he snarled at her as he slammed the car door before she took off.

* * *

"Clark?" Lois said in less than a whisper hopefully.

No reply.

"Anyone?" She stepped in the doorway of the newsroom and walked straight over to her desk. It was too late, almost four in the morning.

Why has she expected Clark to be here? Well, it was more of a hope than an expectation.

She sat still at her disorganized work space, her hands folded over her stomach listening to the peace and quiet. Tears pricked her eyes as she glanced across her desk at the family photos of the past five years of her life. Jason's first birthday, she and Richards first date on his prized sea plane and of course her favorite family photo. She didn't know if it was some sort of sign, but across her family photo a large crack had mysteriously appeared on the frame, dividing her and Richard. She laughed slightly at the irony for that was exactly what she planned to do.

She explored through the bottom doors, finding various coloring pictures hand drawn by her five year old. All of them of course of the same person in the red cape and blue tights.

A few drips of tears smudged the coloring on the 'S' as she looked over the pictures with sorrow. She would have done anything for her baby come bounding into the room yelling "Heya Mr. Clark!" as he usually would after school.

She faded out of her memories and got up slowly and walked over to Clark's desk. A smile emerged on her lips as she recalled him tripping over all the scattered papers amongst the floor knocking over his brand new computer bought by the office, Perry was furious but she found it amusing. Of course that memory was long forgotten by the rest of the world. It was over five years ago before he left for his trip.

Her life seemed to be revolved around the number five. It was the number years Richard and her had been engaged for, it was how old her son was, it was how long it took Superman to return back to earth, and it was the number of years she looked over to her right to find an empty unused desk, waiting for Clark to come home.

She had decided the number five would be her lucky number.

Come to think of it, Superman's return to Metropolis had been right around the time Clark had returned to his rightful place at the newspaper.

She mentally placed herself in both of their arms, what would she do without either one of them now? When they left it was if time had stood still for five years. There was Richard, and he truly was a good man. But not _her_ man. She'd always felt Richard's love was somewhat…empty.

Richard was someone who was there for her when she felt alone, but not when she felt unloved.

She drifted out of her thoughts when something caught her eye. Sitting at the corner of Clark's desk was his thick black glasses.

_Why would Clark leave his glasses here?_ _He's as blind as a bat without them…_

She hesitantly picked them up and held them up to the light as she peeked through the lenses, and gasped.

_Their fake! Clark Kent's glasses are fake!_

_

* * *

_  
"Hi honey."Richard said as she walked in the door and kicked off her high heels in frustration.

"Did you get what you were looking for?"

"Uh-huh…did the p--"

"No the police still haven't found anything Lois." He answered her burning question.

She didn't respond, she stared down at the carpet and walked over to the couch with Richard.

"Everything will be okay sweetheart." He placed his hand gently on her back and pressed his lips against her cheek.

"Jason is a--smart kid. And I don't think Superman will hurt him"

"What?" Lois said startled, her fiancé looked seriously at her.

"Superman, I think he has Jason."

"W-what?" Her brain didn't believe what her ears were telling her. "B-but you told me he ran away."

"Well, yes…I didn't want to worry you until I was a little more sure..."

"You saw Superman kidnap are son?"

"N-no. Not exactly. But honey it makes perfect sense doesn't it? Jason would never really run away, unless Superman told him it was okay right?"

"So…so…this is just an idea. You didn't see Superman and Jason fly away into the sky?"

He hesitated, almost like he was deciding on an answer.

"No I didn't but, it explains his disappearance."

He inched his way over and wrapped his arms around her body.

"But you see it now right? That Superman is a fraud. He's been fooling the world for years."

He put his hand on her face stared her in the eyes.

"I love you Lois, and I'll find Superman and we'll get our son back" He leaned closer and stared to kiss her, but she pulled away.

"What's wrong honey?""Jason is missing Richard. I don't feel like--"

"I just want to know if you love me Lois."

"What? Richard I've told you I love you and I mean it--"

"But do you still love Superman."

She looked away shamefully.

He was shocked. "Lois he kidnappers your only son and you still and love him?

"You don't know Superman took Jason! Your pulling this out of the air!"

"You don't believe me Lois?" He stood up and looked down on her as he shouted. "I knew it Lois, you are having an affair with Superman."

"Richard were not married--"

"And why is that Lois? Tell me that all this time you weren't just using me for an excuse for your pregnancy waiting for him to come back."

"No, no! I love you Richard but--not as--" Her stomach filled with butterflies as she mustered up the courage to tell him the truth. "More as a…friend." She said it, after ever all these years. She admitted it to herself and her fiancé.

He stood speechless and anger filled his eyes.

"A friend? You did! You used me! For and excuse! You never did love me! I was just some random guy who you thought would be a great place holder!"

"No Richard you're more than that--"

"I hate you Lois."

Lois felt her heart skip a beat, her blood stood still. _No, no, no, no._ She wanted to scream it but her throat had closed up.

"Bu-but n-no no y-y-ou doesn't me-an tha--"

"Oh don't stutter Lois, you sound like Clark Kent for God Sakes. Hold your tongue for once!"

Tears streamed down her cheeks like a waterfall, she hadn't been yelled at like this since she was five years old.

"Why did you do this to me Lois?" He grabbed her shoulders and shook her back and forth.

"I didn't mean to do anything to you! I want to love you I really do--"

The next thing she knew Richard had pushed her backwards and onto the carpet.

"I'm sick of you lying to me Lois! Tell me right now, I want you to look me right in eye and tell me how much you love _him_."

"Richard please stop--" She cried in terror as she looked up at the man she had loved for five years, the man she raised her son with, the man she could trust and rely on the man she _thought_ she was in love with.

"Damn it Lois!" He caught his breath. "Get up and face me! Tell me you're in love with Superman!"

Richard yanked her up off the ground and shook her as he blared "I don't want to hurt you Lois, just tell me right now you love him."

"Richard, let go of Lois…_now_."

She could have fainted with relief when she heard the familiar demanding voice sneak up behind her.

The grip on her shoulders was released as Richard yelled out, "_You_! I know you have Jason!"

"Richard your just angry, your not thinking clearly, just back away from Lois and--"

"Don't _you_ tell me what to do!"

Lois couldn't watch any longer and turned around and jumped into her hero's arms.

"SAY IT LOIS! THAT'S ALL I WANT! SAY YOU LOVE SUPERMAN"

"I do." She didn't hold it in any longer as she whispered. "I love you." She wrapped her arms around his neck, as they took off out the door leaving Richard yelling up out them as they flew into the distance.

* * *

Lois cried on Superman as they hovered around safetly in the sky.

"I don't know what would have happened if you hadn't shown up..."

His warm comforting arms slowed the beat of her racing heart back to normal. "Did he hurt you?"

"No…I'm fine. But I was…scared." She looked up into his sky blue eyes.

"I--I don't think he meant it Lois. He was just worried about…about Jason."

She shook her head. "It was more then that. He was upset because of…you…and me."

He remained silent, but what could he say?

"I…can't go back there. I can't go back to him, he'll--"

"He won't hurt you again. I promise, I'll protect you. Everything will be alright now."

_Everything will be alright_. The thought comforted her as they drifted off into the starry sky .

* * *

**So what do you guys think? Will you hold on for a couple of weeks until I get back? I tried not to leave off too much of a cliffhanger so I wouldn't be so evil. By the way, when she refers to the family photo it was supposed to be the picture from the movie when Clark snapped the frame In the middle.  
Once again --begs for mercy on the Richard thing-- PLEASE Review so I'll have some to read when I get back! I promise I will not forget this fic and have at least a few good chapters for you all to look forward too! Byeya!**


	7. Clarky

**Hello Hello Hello! I'm back! And I am sooooo sorry it took me this long to finally get up the next chapter! I hope I haven't lost any readers? It just took me so long from being back from my trip and starting school. Sigh Well the truth is I'm gluing myself to the computer for the next few weeks and am going to upload much more of my writings. Honestly that vacation really has done me some good as I have come back with TONS! And I mean Tons of new ideas for this fic. I couldn't believe it, they just popped out of the air and into my head! So, I can promise you this, as long as you are willing to review and keep reading this fic, you won't be disappointed for this could go on for awhile. Just don't forget about me XD.**

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**Chapter Seven : Clarky **

The last time Lois Lane woke up in a strange bed it was the morning after her twenty-first birthday, and her first horrible experience with alcohol. Her exact chosen words were the classic "_OH MY GOD WHAT HAVE I DONE!_"

After that little episode, she had sworn to never touch another spiked beverage again. Though this time waking up at five in the afternoon on a cloudy Friday, in an unfamiliar bed made her feel quite content.  
Mainly because this time she had been sober enough to remember who put her in that bed.  
She gazed lazily around the light-deprived room in which she had lay in a peaceful slumber, a relaxing end to a hectic week.

_TGIF…_

She decided that an entire work day wasted to unconsciousness in the depths of dreamland was enough to force her stiff bruised body out from underneath the wooly blanket she took haven under.  
She flipped on the light and her eyes were taken aback.  
It was a complete dump, and that was putting it lightly.  
Not a single possession had been speared by the mess tornado that had struck the innocent apartment.

_Where on earth did he bring me?_

Superman claimed she would be safe here, unless tripping over an endless sea of glass was his idea of safe.  
At the time, she took whatever she has given, her eyes had been so blurred she hadn't even been the slightest bit aware of the disaster that lay below her feet as she flopped right down into the bed.

She moseyed on out into the other room, and if possible found an even bigger land of chaos.  
Was this his apartment? Dose Superman even have an apartment? Why is it such a disaster? Her brain skimmed over these questions as she edged her way over to the window, assuming he had gone back out to find Jason.

_Jason._

Nope, she was not going to let her weary eyes suffer the painful tears again, so the determined Lois Lane would have to find a mission to keep her emotions from getting to her heart. She stared across the horror stricken room,

_Why not? Whoever dose live here would appreciate a clean up…_

Most goods were so battered that you could hardly tell what they were supposed to be anymore. Although through her investigation of the person's belongings, she didn't find anything to out of the ordinary.  
A radio, clothes (specifically a man's), books, (that no longer had any pages in them), photo's---

Photos.

Most of them were torn into shreds, the pieces like a treasure map scattered throughout the room. However, it was no use, she tried to piece them back together but they didn't seem to form anything. Expect one.  
It wasn't particularly damaged, the corner ripped off but still constructing a picture of an elderly woman smiling with pride at a young man.  
Both people were strange to her eyes; could one of them be the owner of this apartment? How did he know Superman? Maybe he doesn't? Who was the old woman? Questions, questions, questions…her life seemed to be based on unanswerable questions.

She put the picture aside and continued finishing up her work by tossing the last few pieces of glass into a green trash bag. The cleaning only took up a few hours.

So what was she left to do now?

The only thing she had managed to bring was her little black purse that contained a cell phone, some extra cash, a lighter and a half empty pack of cigarettes.  
She searched for some sort of entertainment to calm her nerves, but of course, the only electronic seemed to be a crushed radio. When she decided to scavenge for a simple snack, at this point she wasn't particularly surprised not even to find a fridge.

Therefore, that brought her back to square one. What was Lois Lane to do on a Friday night, her family in shambles and at least a hundred dollars in her wallet?  
As if on cue, her cell phone began to declare the familiar tune of Beethoven's fifth. She fumbled within her purse coming across an item that she didn't expect had survived the travel with her.

_Clark's glasses?_

She didn't have time to wonder, because the minute she answered the phone a panicky voice began squawking in her ear.

"Lois! I heard you were shot! I came down to Metropolis to see if you were alright--"

"Don't worry Lucy I'm fine." Lois reassured. Lucy was in town? An idea struck her.

"Sis," Lois requested. " Meet me at Johnny's bar downtown in twenty minutes."

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"Oh my God Lois! That's harassment he's done! Why haven't you gone to the police?"

Lois spilled. Everything. If she couldn't even trust her sister, who could she trust?

"Richard really could have hurt you Lois! Or worse! God, you're just lucky Superman came to your rescue…_again_."

Lois sipped down her third drink since entering the loud rambunctious bar with Lucy.

"I don't want to distract the police right now. I want them to focus on finding Jason"

She didn't particularly care about Richard at this point. She just wanted to hold her son again. Lois had hoped her sister would have an idea where Jason could have scurried off too.

"Sorry Lois," Was her reply. "I've only been in Metropolis for a few days. I don't have the slightest clue where he might be."

Lucy snapped her fingers demanding the bartender order up another round of drinks.

"Lucy I really shouldn't have anymore..."

"Nonsense Lois, besides you're a mess." Her sister had such a wonderful way with words. "This will help cheer you up."

Why _shouldn't_ she drink? If any woman had the right to it would be her. She was just plain angry and hurt. Richard had done a lot more than physical damage, but he'd tossed away a five-year relationship because of a little jealousy. The way his eyes burned when he announced his true hatred for her had been stuck in her mind.  
She could still feel the numbing sensation where his hands had squeezed her arms as he shook her back and forth.

But it was partly her fault too; she should have seen this coming in the past few weeks. When Lois had confessed to him about Jason's true biological father, he did an absolute three sixty flip of anger or her.  
That was the first time where Lois had ever seen him lose complete control over his temper. Then the continuous demand to know if she loved him repeatedly. And there was no doubt in her mind that he didn't love Jason the same way. He'd almost completely shut him out all together. Lois recalled the incident in the hospital where he had lost it, taking his rage out on innocent Jason. She shivered as she remembered the minute she came home Richard began accusing Superman of kidnapping Jason-- Lois put her thoughts to a halt.

No. Unacceptable. Not possible.

But the clues were beginning to add up. Lois told herself that even though she herself had never spoken to police about Jason, _Richard_ had taken care of it. Just as he said he did.

_Richard_ had become jealous over Superman over the last few weeks.

_Richard_ was losing love for Jason.

_Richard_ was the last person seen with Jason.

_Richard _accused Superman of Jason's disappearance. And perhaps _Richard_ had even lied to her about calling the police.

He heart was screaming No, no, NO! But her head logically kept repeating Yes, yes, yes…

"Lois, you okay?" A silence had remained in between the siblings while Lois had been putting pieces of the puzzle together. She quickly gulped down the last sip of her Margarita.

"Lucy, I think I'll be needing a few more of these…"

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Shock, utter shock. Like a lighting bolt had rattled through his body, Clark stared open mouthed at a spotless room. When he came back to check up on his sleeping beauty, the last thing he expected to find was this.

_She cleaned? Lois Lane cleaned my apartment…_

A flood of dread lurched up into his stomach, what exactly had Lois _found_ during her duties as a meter maid?  
Like every other human being, he did have a few personal items laying around…

Neatly pushed away into the corner of the room was a mound of black trash bags piled up to the ceiling. He scanned through them quickly, his eyes darting around like a bee. Nothing special, broken lamps, ripped clothes, a lot of glass--wait--the clothes. He swallowed thinking about what Lois's expression was when she found office suits and plaid shirt's hidden in the back of Superman's closet.  
Every possession he had owned was buried somewhere in those trash bags, thanks to Luther. The only thing that remained was his bed, a few blankets, and--damn.  
A picture.

Lois must have found it in the debris, for it had been placed gently on the unmade sheet less bed. It was a photo taken the day he left Smallville for the Metropolis "Planet." Taken quite a few years ago of his mother and him--no not of him--of Clark, on the farm. He was younger then, perhaps Lois didn't recognize him. But even so, she would defiantly have her suspicions.

Okay, so maybe taking Lois to his apartment wasn't the greatest idea he'd ever had. But to have his fair princess locked away in the depths of a cheap motel? He wouldn't dream of it! He figured Lois would be out like a lamp for a few hours, maybe even be able to stay out of trouble for awhile. He really should have known better than to test the limits of Lois Lane's ability to control her curiosity.

It wasn't hard to track her down; he would have recognized Lois's distinct laughter from Mars.  
What struck him most was _where_ he found Lois's laughter coming from.

_A bar? Lois drank?_

How much shock could come in one night?

Her familiar figure emerged from the alcoholic infested building; she was accompanied by another young woman.

"Lois, let me take you home--"

"Wah for? I'm havin' a party right here sis." Lois's words were slurred and jumbled. "'Sides, it's not like I have a 'home' to go home toooo…." Clark lingered high above building watching Lois tumble over into the middle of the street, the other woman trying to drag her back over to the abandoned sidewalk.

"Lois you really--"

"Chill Luce, I'm cooool. I unlike you have already called a--" _Hick!_ "…cab."

The woman looked doubtful "I'll wait with you--"

"Go _home_ Lucy!" Lois demanded as shed stopped her foot with impatience.

The woman who had claimed to be Lucy scanned Lois before whipping around and marching off down the street in a rage. She cussed and muttered dirty facts about her sister until Clark saw her disappear around the corner.

He made sure the streets were soul-less before tapping Lois on the shoulder.  
She jumped around with a shirk as his greeting.

"Oh golly you scared the bajezzers outta me!" Lois scolded him playfully.

"Lois, why are you at a bar? Who was that woman? Why did you clean that room? Why are you--"

"Wowowowowow…slow down Super-duper-man! Why do you get to ask all the questions? _I'm_ the reporter 'member?"

"Lois are you…" He might as well just ask it blunt and plainly. "Are you drunk?" She swayed from side to side, not seeming to be able to concentrate ahead of her.

"Me? Lois Lane drinking? Haha yeah right." She held her head high and stood straight up with dignity "…Now, do you have a garbage pail?"

"Why?" He said already dreading the answer. He had to admit it, this was a whole new side of Lois he'd never had the pleasure (or unpleasure) of meeting.

"Cause I'm gunna hurl..."

Lois spun around and bent down on her hands and knees and gagged out all over the sewer grate.

"Oh Lois," He laid a hand on her back and rubbed it gently. "Come on let's get you home."

"Home? I can't go home, I have a man waiting to beat me up at home."  
She barley chocked out the sentence before letting another barrel of alcohol slush out of her mouth.  
She was _afraid_, afraid of Richard.

"Lois I'll take you somewhere-- "

"Safe?" She muttered out as he helped her lift her off the ground.

"Okay," She responded like a small child that had been just asked to bed "But wai wai wait…I got a surprize for ya first."

"Lois--"

"Close your eyes."

"Please--"

"Close your eyes!" She repeated to the world. This wasn't going to get anywhere, so he sighed and obeyed.

"Their closed."

"Tight?"

He saw darkness. "Tight."

" 'K."

Clark stood for a moment before flipping open his eyelids in shock of what Lois had placed on the bridge of his nose.

"Hiya Clarky!"

His mouth dropped open when he realized he was staring down at Lois through a lens.He remained silent for a minute watching Lois grin back up at him, but with all the fiery questions boiling up inside him, he decided to play it cool.

"Lois, it's time to go now. That was a _very_ nice surprise." He spoke down her as if she were no older than Jason.

"Okay Clarky," _Hick! _ "...but first you gotta do something for me."

He gulped "Whatever you need Lois."

She blushed and looked down at her feet. "Kiss me."

He was slightly taken aback "What?"

"Clark has never kissed me before. I promise to come home if you do..."

Her smile lit up as he leaned over to give her a light gentleman kiss.

She patted him on the shoulder. "That's my Clarky."

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It was a painful night. Questions soared through his mind refusing to let him drift into sleep. How did Lois figure it out? How long had she known? Where had she gotten his glasses from? Did Jason know? Did Richard? Is that why she stepped in front of the gun at work?

Then of course there was the everlasting debate of emotions. Was this a bad thing? Should he try and erase her memory again? Was she safe knowing the truth?  
But he couldn't help feeling the slightest bit relived. A tiny spark of hope that he could finally have a real future with Lois had been created from the ashes of loss.

For that he felt guilty, he knew being as far away as possible from Lois would keep her safe. He rose with the dawn like his farm boy days and decided when Lois woke up, she would be needing that first cup of coffee.

But he being Superman, didn't stop there. He flew to one of the best restaurants in France to pick up a morning buffet.  
He chose to remain in his Super suit realizing that him suddenly transforming into Clark over night might be a bit too much even for a Saturday morning.

"Wow."

He whorled around to see Lois had quietly snuck up out of bed.

"Morning!" Clark grinned as she held rubbed her head.

"Gezz, the world is spinning. I haven't been on a hangover like this in ten years."

She looked down at the red and white plaid picnic blanket he had laid out of the carpet.

"I'm sorry this isn't exactly fine dining." She gazed down at the food longingly.

"It's smells sooo good. But I…can't stay for very long. I have to run into work for a moment."

"Lois you're really not in the condition to--"

"I won't be five minutes, I just need to speak with Clark."

The grin slid off his face "What?"

Her eyes danced around the room. "I didn't exactly get closure from the last time we talked. I really just need to see him for a minute."  
She breathed out a sigh of relief. "Thank God your still here you know. To tell you the truth I was so…out of it I really don't remember anything about last night."

"N-nothing…really?"

"I didn't do anything illegal did I?"

"N-no." His voice was growing softer and he was slowly degrading down into Clark mode. His heart had sank, he had whished so much that his double life could have been put to rest.

"My sister Lucy was on town, and with everything that happened…I guess I just had a few too many."

He avoided her apologetic gaze. "It's alright," He chocked out "I understand."

She suddenly took him by the hand and whispered. "But I do remember one thing."

His hopes lifted.

"Superman…I think I know where Jason is."

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**How did you like it? I just thought writing Lois drunk would be fun (and it was) anyway! PLEASE! Leave a review, I really need to know how many people are reading this so I can get an idea of weather I should continue this or not. And I really don't want to give up on it yet with so many new idea's being tossed at me so please spare a review! Oh and again, sorry about the spelling errors and type-os.  
**


	8. So yesterday

**Hello!**

**Sorry it took me so long to update, I was looking for a beta.  
But finally at last I have found one, give a big round of applause to_ LostSchizophrenic_! Yay!**

**Anyway on with the show...**

* * *

**_Chapter eight: So yesterday_**

He scanned the house, peering through the walls for any sort of movement. There was Richard, slumped on the couch flipping through the channels that gave off the only source of light in the gloomy bitter room.

As he x-rayed the rest of the house while hovering outside, he saw a tiny sight that made his heart jump.

Jason.

How could he have bee so blind? How could he been so stupid? He watched the blanket rise up and down signifying his son's deep breathing as he lay in a deep distant sleep safely tucked into bed.

At first he wasn't sure about Lois's theory, he believed that her subconscious mind and wounded heart had created a fictional hope that Jason was with Richard. But as she explained all the clues, Richard being the last one seen with him, Richard claiming Superman himself to have kidnapped Jason, Richard becoming so violent and aggressive in her time of need, it became clearer to Clark that it may be the unwanted truth. It was no wonder she was such an outstanding reporter.

Now Clark gawked at the reality, there had never been a claim to the police that Jason was missing because Jason never actually went missing; he was in Richard's care the entire time. After Lois had gone, the rest was simple, just stay quiet. Who would suspect a loving father like Richard? All he had to do was lay low around the house for a few days, and keep Jason silently asleep from Superman's super-hearing. Clark suspected Jason may be on some kind of drug by his pale face a raspy breathing, to keep him from waking up. A fire of rage flew through his body, how could a father hurt his only son like that?

Although it shouldn't have been so surprising, thousands of children went through the same unloving predicaments everyday because of careless parents. Jason was just one of the lucky ones that had other people that truly loved him. Some children would suffer for the rest of their lives, or even die because of people like Richard. And Clark was not about to let his son become one of those innocent children.

He was done with giving Richard the benefit of the doubt, he couldn't help it before. Clark had no business dropping into their family after five years, he knew Richard would have some concerning feelings, and even some anger to unleash on Lois, but bringing his son into the argument was the final straw.

He didn't wait for an invitation, he simply let himself interrupt Richard's quite evening at home by blowing the door across the house and into the window with quite the dramatic crash.

For only a split second, a shadow of shock crossed over Richard's face before he said "What took you so long?"

Clark wasn't in the mood for games; of course he'd been expected.

"What were you waiting for Richard? You just planned to sit around here until I came to stop you?" Clark asked, in a deeper firmer voice than he'd perhaps ever used before.

"Stop me from doing what?" Richard defended himself with feigned innocence. "What have I done to anger the mighty God of Metropolis?"

"I want Jason, _now_."

"Well, you'll have to come back for a play date later, Jason isn't feeling so well at the moment," Richard said coolly.

"Richard, I'll warn you now. I'll do whatever it takes to get my son back," Superman spoke with a tone he'd never used before, one that was far more intimidating than any other he'd used before.

"God, when the hell has he ever been your son?" He clearly wasn't scared so easily. "You take off for five years without a word and expect the world to throw you a welcome back party? I raised Jason, I replaced you in the screwed up life you started on earth. Jason is my son now, he always has been. You _abandoned_ him!"

"Why did you lie to Lois?" Clark demanded, dangerously close to losing his temper. "Why did you say he ran away?"

"To get her to see the real you! To show her what I've always known—that you're not human and you don't have dreams and emotions , that you can't love like normal people can! To show her how unhappy she would be with you," Richard spat.

Clark could feel the pure hatred in Richard's eyes as he revealed the green kryptonite ring placed on his finger. His recollections traced back through the weeks events, and remembered the warehouse. Luthor's men had the exact same accessory.

"It's been you all along…" His brain raced through his memories and he stared at Richard, horrified. How could this have happened? Richard said he loved Lois and Jason, how, then, could he do this? "I couldn't figure out how Luthor's men knew where Lois lived. But it was you. You've been betraying Lois to Luthor. You knew Lois was going to be the one who was shot…"

"No, that wouldn't be my doing. You can thank Clark Kent for that one," Richard said, eyes cold.

Wait. He halted his thoughts, Richard still hadn't figured out Clark's secret? That meant that the chances were Luthor didn't know either.

"Clark was supposed to be shot for screwing around in our business. I wouldn't hurt Lois like that---," Richard began to explain.

"You stole her son for your own personal gain, you betrayed her to Luthor, you got his men trying to kidnap her, you harassed her in her own house and you say you would never hurt her? Don't stand there and lie to me! Jason is her world. I know you could destroy everyone else on the planet, Clark Kent included and it would hurt her less than stealing her son," he hissed, the final threads holding his temper back, snapping.

"All of it was for her own good, to save her from you. Jason was caught in the middle of everything, so I used him. There's nothing I can do about him, he'll still grow up to be a monster like you--!"

Breaking point. Clark threw himself up against Richard forcing him up against the wall. "Luthor tried to kill all of you, why would you go to him?"

Before Clark could blink, Richard jabbed in the side with the Kryptonite ring.

"For this, I've got Kryptonite by the truck-load. You are going to leave this world. The sun still rose every morning even though Superman wasn't here. You aren't needed here anymore, and if you won't leave humans alone, I'll take care of you myself."

Clark could feel the familiar burning sensation emerging from Richard's pockets as he pulled out two large stones of solid green.

"You stole my wife, you stole my son, and you stole my entire life! You don't belong here, I do, and you can't ever have them. You're not human!"

Everything happened in a flash second, Richard first jabbed the rock of Kryptonite into Clark's chest and he fell down to his knees gasping in pain desperately searching for a solution.

"Stop hurting Superman!"

With his vision blurry from Richard chucking the second piece of green rock that collided with his head, Clark looked up to see a tiny worried face and a pair of hands clutching a very familiar red blanket.

"I'll be good. I promise, please don't hurt Superman!" The voice quivered gently and softly, but the sound of his son's voice soothed Clark's ears.

"Jason, quick. Go upstairs," Richard ordered.

Clark didn't have the strength to protest, he held his chest tightly trying to pull out the long stick of Kryptonite, but was powerless against Richards endless pounding with the ring.

"Daddy stop! Why are you hurting him? Did I do something bad? Was it because mommy kissed him?"

Now ignoring his Jason's plea, he continued to bash and strike Clark hammering the stone further and further into his wound.

"Stop it! Daddy stop now!"

Tears streamed down Jason's face as he stomped his foot demanding Richard cease.His hand was seized by a tiny grip as a last desperate warning came, "STOP NOW!"

From was Clark could tell, Richard's hand had been completely swallowed by a raging ball of fire crawling up his arm.

Finally Richard's beating came to a halt and was replaced by a scream of horror and a mad dash towards the bathroom to aid his flaming arm. Jason, now wide eyed with mouth gasping for breath, edged slightly over to the wall Clark had been forced up against. "Superman," His eyes darted down towards the sickening crystal of green wedged inside his hero.

"Jason-," Clark gasped. "Go, get out now."

Jason shook his head defiantly, "You're coming with me." He wrapped his two tiny hands around the stick of Kryptonite. "Its stingy…" he observed.

"Don't touch it," Clark barley whispered the order, before relief swept through his body as his son yanked the stick out of his chest and smashed it into the blaring television screen.

Jason stood frozen, looking in amazement at his hands.

"JASON!" Richards powerful voice made the little boy jump out of his trance.

"He's coming back, come on Superman, please get up!" Jason begged softly.

Clark struggled to his feet in a daze; he could already feel his chest begin to mend itself.  
Jason looked behind himself in the direction of the bathroom where Richard screamed and cursed.

"I did that, Superman…" His shaky voice made Clark's heart ache. "I made that fire…" He looked so afraid and ashamed—as if he'd done something unforgivable, which was not true.

Clark opened his arms as his son collapsed into his love.

He cried softly, sniffling a bit, "Daddy really hurt you…" he whispered.

"I'm just fine Jason, but your mother is very worried about you. Would you like to go see her now?" Clark assured him gently, wiping the tears away.

His mouth dropped open and gasped, "Daddy told me m-mommy died at the hospital!"

Clark could take no more of the lies that had been fed to his son. His jaw tightened as he held back his fury so as not to frighten the boy, "Mommy's not hurt anymore, but she's very sad and misses you. We have to go now--."

"Fly?" asked Jason, his eyes lighting up.

Clark wrapped his son up in the big red blanket Jason had clutched so tightly and carried him towards the space where the door had once been. He smiled, "Yes. Fly."

* * *

It was the waterworks all afternoon when Clark returned home with the little red bundle. Lois wouldn't let her son go, her relief almost tangible, while Clark watched proudly as his family was re-united. 

"Mommy I'm sorry…" Jason's voice was soft.

Lois tried to pull herself back together while whipping tears away from her face. "You haven't done anything wrong Jas-…"

"Yes I did! I did something very bad!" Jason protested.

She glanced up at Clark for an explanation. "Jason, what you have to understand is that it wasn't your fault," he murmured, placing a hand on his son's shoulder.

"Oh God, what happened?" Lois asked, expecting the worst.

"I made daddy's hand go on fire…" Jason whispered. She was silent, not sure how to respond, "I'm sorry!" he cried, panicking. "I got so angry, and my eyes went all hot. Daddy was hurting Superman and--!"

"Jason," Clark reassured, "it wasn't your fault. Okay? No one is angry with you...It wasn't your fault…Do you understand?"

"I don't understand why he wanted to hurt you!" Jason said, frowning.

"Jason," Lois jumped in now, "Your dad was very confused. He didn't know what he was doing."

Oh, he knew exactly what he was doing. But it was an edited version of the truth for a five year old. One step at a time, Jason would eventually discover the rest.

"Why don't you go take a nap in the other room Jason?" Lois suggested gently.

He trotted slowly off with the blanket wrapped around his shoulders. He paused and turned back a moment, "Mommy will you come tuck me in?"

Lois nodded, "In a minute...I'll be right there, sweetheart." As soon as Jason had closed the door behind him, Lois went into overdrive, "Alright tell me what happened. Everything. Don't you dare leave out a single detail. Where's Richard now? Did he hurt Jason? Did he have Kryptonite? Are you alright? Why is our son a pyromaniac--?"

"Easy Lois, slow down. I'll explain everything," Clark soothed.

* * *

Lois had now gained a new appreciation for her son's abilities. "If Jason hadn't burned Richard right then…" she swallowed hard as he squeezed her hand gently. 

"Richard has a large supply of Kryptonite. He got it from--," Clark began.

"Lex Luthor," she breathed as she read his mind.

"Lois, I'm sorry. I truly am."

"He just threw five years of his life away!" she said, bewildered, hurt, and furious.

"I--."

"Don't you dare try and blame yourself. For God's sake, it's not your fault," Lois felt her heart rate double in speed, thoughts about the future raced through her head. Where would they go? How would they live? What about her work? Where did Superman fit in with all this?

"You can do it too? Heat vision right? That's what he used?" she asked finally.

"Yes," he said carefully. She knew his abilities and was smart enough to realize the obvious—that Jason would have them too, most likely.

"Good, because somebody is going to have to explain to Jason why he lit his—Richard's arm on fire, and that somebody is not going to be me. I already have to cover why "daddy" hurt Superman, where we're going to live because he took our house, why his daddy tried to tell him I was dead and--!"

"Lois, maybe you should rest," he suggested gently.

"I don't need rest, I need answers!" she snapped.

"What do want to know?" his voice was soft and soothing. He'd answer a few of her questions if it would put her at ease enough to rest for a little while, because she really did need it.

She sighed, "Well first, I want to know where it is you've brought us."

His eyes didn't leave her face as he searched for a response that would answer her question without giving away too much, "I keep this apartment for emergencies…and, well, I _do_ need to sleep occasionally," he said with a faint smile.

She nodded, "So it is yours then?"

"Yes."

"Why do you own such a--," she frowned, gesturing to the dingy walls and stained carpeting, "I mean, why here? Why not somewhere a bit more…comfortable?"

"Luthor." That was all he needed to say before she got the picture.

She decided not to mention the photo just yet, and would keep that for her own little investigation. The less he knew she knew, the better. "What do I do now?" she asked, her voice trembling as she finally voiced the final question. "Richard is out of my life…But, he…He took everything. I have nothing…" her voice was soft. The things didn't matter, but it did matter that she have a place for her son.

Today was today.

"You have Jason. And you have me, we'll help you," he promised softly. His arms around her calmed her.

Superman was today.

"Why did all of this happen?" she asked, meaning his arms around her. The rest of it was past.

Yesterday was yesterday.

He whispered softly, "Because I love you."

And Richard was so yesterday.

* * *

**F.Y.I this chapter name was inspired by Hilary Duff's "So yesterday"**

**Once again give _BIG HUGE_ thanks to LostSchizophrenic and please please please review! Was it much better with a beta? I think so XD. Next chapter coming _really_ soon.**


	9. Guilt

**I'm back.  
Okay first off, I'm very sorry for the long delay bows down to forgiveness Actually my beta was on vacation and I wanted to wait for her to read over it first before giving it all to you. So to clear one thing up, no I have not abandoned this story. In fact, during that little break I've accomplished quite a lot and I am a few chapters ahead of you. So lots to look forward too. Just as long as you don't forget me ! I LOVE the reviews for this. All questions will be answered through the fic shortly.  
Once again give hugs to _LostSchizophrenic_ for the amazing beta!**

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**  
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**Chapter nine: Guilt**

Clark's definition of 'normal' was slowly coming back into his life.

After a few days of rest, both he and Lois returned to work. Jason hesitantly, was sent back to school and everyone's dreary moods seemed to be somewhat uplifted from one of the last sunny days that would be seen before winter would make its way into Metropolises.

"Excellent to have you back again Kent." Perry patted him on the back. "Good to know my team isn't afraid of a few… set backs."

Of course he was referring to the last time Clark had set foot into the newsroom, when Lois had been shot.

"Morning Clark!"

He turned his attention from Perry and had to literally bite down on his tongue to refrain from screaming when Richard briskly passed by.

"Jesus Richard, what in the world did you do it screw up your arm?" Perry was mystified at the bright white cast wrapped around Richards's right upper limb.

"Aw, cooking doesn't seem to be my specialty. Stove went up in flames." It was such an incredibly lame story, the entire newsroom seem to buy it.

"Anyway, I just wanted to say hi to Kent, quiet a shock we had a few days ago."

_A shock indeed. _

With recent discovery that Richard had been in behind the scenes of the plot with Luther, Clark was astounded Richard had the nerve to look him in the eye. It wasn't bad enough Lois was still caught up in his web of lies, but now just realizing that they both would have to work with Richard they would have to put on a face everyday to a man that kidnapped their son.

"Lois seems to be holding up, after all she's been through with Jason. Where was he f-found again?"

"At the park," Richard answered pathetically "he was a little frightened when he saw Lois in the hospital and ran off to the park to try and pick her some flowers. No worries though, police found him in no time."

The amount of this man's ability to lie was enough to make Perry choke up.

"You've raised a heck of a kid Richard. Are you really sure you and Lois won't be able to work it out?"

This immediately caught Clark's interest. Work what out? Had Lois already spoken to Richard?

"Unfortunately no, Lois's heart belongs to someone else now."

"But Jason--" Perry began to object.

"Will come and live with me,"

Clark couldn't help it, his mouth dropped open.

"Lois has agreed to sign the papers for the custody of Jason today."

"B-but you're not married…" Clark couldn't restrain himself from some matter of disapproving protest.

Richard straightened up, "That's true…but I am Jason's biological father. And Lois can't quite provide at the moment. I've got the necessities it takes to raise a child. Jason will be fine."

"I hope everything works out alright Richard," Perry gave one of his rare sympathetic smiles to his nephew.

"Thank you. Good to see you again Clark, I'd better be getting back to work."

As both men took their leave, Clark stood in the exact same spot for about ten minutes in bewilderment.

"Lois!"

The only thing able to wake him from his trace of astonishment was when Richard suddenly called out to Lois who had just entered the room hurrying towards her desk.

"What do you want Richard?" In this case Clark felt no guilt listening in on their private matter, both their back's turned to the room and they appeared to be chatting harmlessly. Their voices were barley above a whisper.

"Sign this." Richard shoved a few papers under her nose. As she skimmed them over quickly she asked darkly. "This is some sort of a joke right? God Richard you're just lucky you aren't not in prison right now-"

"Prison, for what?"

"Don't toy with me."

"Other than you and Super-ass know, I'm completely innocent to rest of the world."

"What's stopping me from going to the police right now Richard?"

"What have you got on me? Who's going to believe you? I could take you to court and get Jason's custody right now Lois. You're the one who cheated, who do you think the judge would believe?"

Lois didn't reply and sunk down lower into her chair.

"Let's save all that time and money, just sign the papers Lois. And you and I can both move on."  
It occurred to Clark that Lois hadn't been aware that Richard even dreamed about the idea of receiving custody of her son it was sprung on her just as it had Clark.

"I will not sign these papers Richard. You can't have Jason."

"Have it your way then," Richard slyly reached into his pocket and revealed a little tiny shard of green, thrusting it in Lois's face.

"What's that supposed to mean?" She said coldly.

"It mean's if you don't sign these papers Lois, I _will _kill him."

"You'd kill your son--"

"You know who I mean. He was only lucky enough to get away last time because Jason wasn't affected by this little mineral. But put this tiny shard in Superman for long enough, and he'll die."

For a moment the couple did nothing but stare into each other's hateful gaze, but Lois finally surrendered by pulling out her pen.

It was almost like a horrible nightmare come to life, Lois regretfully scribbled on the sheet in front of her.

Clark could stand and watch no more, it was now essential for him to intervene for the Jason's safety.

"Lois!" He darted away from the spot where he stood motionless and _gracefully_ bumped into Lois's desk spilling her morning coffee all over the document.

"Oh-oh, Lois I'm really s-sorry…" He said attempting to help them clean up the mess, as he bent over he was relieved not to find Lois's signature on the paper, but in big bold letters scrolled across the dotted line read '**Up yours**'

Clark smiled and scolded himself for doubting that Lois would ever give up her son.

"Oh, no problem Clark." Lois said cheerfully, her eyes screaming with gratitude.

Richard on the other hand didn't seem as pleased. "We'll finish up the rest of this later then Lois?"

She simply nodded brushing him off and turning towards Clark. "Can we talk?"

* * *

"It's gotten chillier up here..." Lois observed as she wrapped her arms around herself.

"Yes, are you sure you want to talk up here?" Clark quickly fallowed Lois out onto the familiar rooftop of _The Planet_,the only place she could ever escape the world from.

"Yes, it's a little more private…um Clark," She began not wanting to waste time and get the dreadful scene over with. "In the hospital, I was a bit…rude."

"Rude?" He blinked curiously.

"Yes, see I said some things that…I suppose I didn't really mean." Declaring love for Clark Kent was certainly something she hopefully didn't mean.

"Oh." His face fell. "_That._ Well it's really fine Lois, I understand. You were in the hospital and all…"

She stared up at his dancing eyes, not having the courage to look directly in her face.

"Really Lois, its fine."

He spoke so calmly and kind to her. He was someone normal, someone who was outside of all the craziness in her life, someone she could always talk to about anything.

"Your so lucky everything is so simple for you Clark…" She added with a small smile.

"Lois," He asked softly "Is something…wrong?"

She couldn't do it. She couldn't stand there and keep her crises secrete from her best friend. "He's taking him Clark!" Tears started to sting her eyes as she struggled to keep them back.

"Who's--"

"Richard! He's taking Jason! He's making me go to court, he's going to take my baby!"

At this point all of her dignity had been lost so she simply fallowed the tug in her heart to grant Clark with the most heartfelt hug possible.

He seemed to be a little overwhelmed but joined her in the moment.

"I--I'm going to lose him Clark…"

"No you won't." It was not a question, it wasn't even a statement, it was like a promise. In three little words she seemed to relax in his arms.

"What am I supposed to do? Richard has my house, he made most of the money…he's got everything. I can barley afford to go out to the grocery store. There's no way I can support Jason on my own-"

"Lois, stop. Take a deep breath."

She did he instructed and she let some oh her panic flow out gently.

"I'll help you, you won't lose Jason."

"But I'm the one who had the affair, I'm the one who screwed up! There's no obvious reason the judge should let me have custody of him." She couldn't add the fact that it was Richard who had kidnapped and drugged her son no matter how much she wanted to. She couldn't use any of that in court without giving away a hint of Jason's true paternity.

"Clark no matter what I do, Richard will always have the right to be involved in Jason's life. There's not--"

"But Richard isn't even his father!"

She chocked on her own air, and took a step back. It was the first time she'd ever seen Clark come anywhere near losing his temper.

She wouldn't play dumb, if he knew he knew "How…do you know that?" She was very cautious.

He stared down at her through his thick fake glasses. "It doesn't matter how I know--"

"Then how long? If you won't tell me how…then…" She was so lost in a hurricane of emotions she could barley keep a steady train of thought.

"Long enough. Jason is…different because of his father…"

"I don't understand, how did you know Clark? Dose anyone else know? Did Jason say something to you? Is that how you figured it out?"

"Wait, wait, wait, Lois you know I would never tell anyone."

She nodded looking away from her friend and asked herself, was this a good thing? Was she putting Clark's life in danger with this secrete? To her own amazement she seemed to be partially relieved that someone else, someone normal, could finally be let in.

"Why didn't….you tell me you knew that Jason is Superman's son?" Just saying it plain and simple made her feel much better.

"Because I was, well scared…" He said disgracefully.

"What? Scared Clark, why--"

"That you thought I would see you different, or Jason different. I thought I might wreck e-everything…"

She couldn't help it, she smiled. He always cared for her; she'd known it since forever. She'd known Clark forever. The fact that he was willing to keep such a enormous secrete just to keep up a friendly relationship with her, was heart melting.

"Were you ever going to tell me?"

"I don't know." At least he was honest.

She rubbed his arm gently "I'm glad."

"W-what?"

"You really don't know how happy you've made me Clark. I'm not alone anymore." But she broke the sentimental moment by adding "Of course you proudly think I'm a sluttish little--"

"Lois! Your not--" He began awkwardly "that…"

"Clark why are you so nice to me?" she spoke as she laughed at his inability to use such a dirty word.

"B-because, I…I want you to be happy a-and because I r-r-really…" He stumbled out the end of his heartfelt statement. "I c-care about you…"

The final look of timidity in his eyes was the spark of the fire; she came closer to him, too close now for her to back away now. And right then and there she awarded Clark Kent's lips one of those most gentle kisses in her life. Unfortunately she only just let the moment sink in before pulling back in bewilderment of what she had done.

If she hadn't had been so speechless, she would have giggled at his brilliantly bright red face.

"I'm sorry, I can't--" She sobbed and gazed at him regretfully for an instant before dashing back into the building. Leaving Clark lost for words.

* * *

Guilt, it dose strange things to humans. It's a force almost as powerful and as manipulating as love.

It takes over your brain; you lose all sense of good judgment and common sense. If you're not completely heartless you may just be dim-witted enough to confess you're frowned upon crime and spend a long period of time making emends to society and possibly writing a long sappy dragged out speech of apology.

Now, Lois Lane was not known for being able to recite all the elements of the periodic table from memory, but she was certainly considered to be bright woman among her co-works. However today, her soul being consumed by guilt, she choose to do the perhaps most dim-witted act she's ever performed in her life and began preparing her own apologiy speech for her confession.

Her hands were shaking violently; her knees felt soft and started to buckle as she walked slowly pacing back and forth fiddling with her hair, biting her nails, whistling to herself, anything to take her mind off the long painful waiting game.

A storm was brewing in the pit of her stomach; every breath she took in made her feel light headed and nauseous.

In conclusion these symptoms made it easy for her to diagnose the illness, guilt.

Any minute he could surprise her, it was _his_ apartment after all. Any moment he could fly through that window (as he didn't prefer the stairs) and what would she say? She couldn't lie to Superman of all people.

_I kissed Clark, I kissed Clark._

The same three letter phrase ran over and over again in her mind as she kept replaying the scene of his sweet, caring kiss trying to make sense of out the event. She tried to convince herself that it was all in the heat of the moment, but it felt like so much more.

The guilt came from betraying Superman; he'd done _so_ much for her now. And she could lose it all because of a stupid vulnerable moment. She couldn't help but try and compare him to Richard. Would he react in the same violent manner?

Then of course there was the dreaded cloud of darkness hovering over her head that her precious son would be taken away. There wasn't even the slightest glimmer of hope that she could win a trail for custody. She glanced around her pitiful surroundings, and doubted she would even have a case and that horrible welfare agency would find them first.

Over the past few days Superman had provided a new fridge, a new mattress, a small table with a few chairs, a couch, clothes and bathroom necessities and even a small television set. She didn't dare ask how or where he got all the provisions, but he simply explained. "You're my family, I'm going to take care of you both."

_Family. _The word made her stomach turn, she cheated on the father of her son.

She was going to lose her family to Richard and her adultery. Salty tears stung her eyes, but she swore she would try and keep herself together so she could talk it all out with Superman, he had a way with making things seems a lot less worse.

"Hello Lois."

Well there he was, his daily checkups on them were never put off. He stood so tall and strong above her in his suit, his eyes were filled with love as they scanned her slowly, capturing every moment like it would be their last. But while he stood tall and proud as a skyscraper she ended up shifting and shaking like an earthquake from the tremors of guilt.

"Hi." She greeted in one shot faint syllable.

"Superman!"

A wide grin spread across his face as Jason bolted into the room leaping up into his fathers arms with a big red blanket tied around his neck trailing behind.

"I brought you some more crayons Jason." Superman revealed a tiny pack of colourful Crayola's and Jason's eyes lit up. "I'll draw some more pictures of us flying together!" He marvelled over the precious gift from his father. "Superman if I have a cape, will I be able to fly like you?"

"Well maybe some day whe---"

"AHEM!" Lois coughed loudly suddenly as both men gave her their full attention.

"Jason, why don't you take your crayons and go draw Superman another picture?"

"Okay, this time I'll draw you and me with heat vision!" Jason scurried out into the other room making flying sound effects with his red cape fluttering behind.

Superman's grin was unmistakable, it was the same beaming with pride smile that used to come across Richard's face.

"I know you want to have a closer relationship with Jason. I understand that, I really do." Lois began quietly. "But at this point, I don't think it's the right time to tell him that he'll be flying someday."

Superman muscles seemed to tense at her disagreement.

"I have to tell him sometime Lois, I thought you wanted me to explain to him why he can use heat--"

"I know, I know I said that….but cretin events have played out that--" Her voice began to tremble "-that I don't know how much longer Jason will be in my care…"

"I won't let it happen," He answered sternly. "I promise you I will not let Richard take our son. I'm--sorry for eavesdropping on you today…"

His words were almost enough to want to let Lois fall into his arms and fly far away, but she couldn't. She had to look him straight in the eye and tell him the truth. Her whole body shook and her palms were sweaty but stammered out briefly and honestly. "I--I kissed him."

To her surprise, she didn't get the frightening reaction she expected only a simple curios look "Who, Richard?"

"No!" she cried in frustration. "Clark Kent, Clark Kent I _kissed him_."

Thick, deathly silence separated them as if they were miles apart. She thought any moment he would come at her with rage, but to her second astonishment he simply uttered "I…I wasn't excepting you to tell me this…" His voice was calm and cool yet higher than she was familiar with. "Why?"

"I…I…" She helplessly scrambled for answer. "I don't know…"

He took a step forward and she flinched back. Slightly nervous as he approached he said "I'm not Richard."

He was clearly sensing her fear from the last experience with her fiancé. At last she let down her guard and let him embrace her, arms protecting her like a shield.

"Lois," He swallowed bravely "Do you love him?"

Finally she sobbed "Yes."

But backfired with "But I don't know why! I know him, I've known him for a long time. Before all this happened he was just a co-worker, just barley a friend. But since _everything_ I've gotten so much closer to him. I don't know why but it feels like I've been drawn to him lately. There's just _something _about him…"

Not that didn't help that she knew he had a secrete of his own, faking his poor sense of vision.

She gazed up at him with sorrow "I'm just so, so, sorry."

Though for Lois her betrayal was tearing her apart inside, Superman just responded with a look.

It wasn't quite a smile but still not a frown, just a comforting gaze as if trying to send her a message with his eyes.

"I…I would have waited you know." Her mind traced back to before his departure.

"What?" He blinked.

"If you just would have told me, if you just would have said goodbye. If I knew you were going to come back…I would have waited for you."

"I--"

"Don't tell me it was too painful!" She flared unexpectedly. "It was pretty painful not having the slightest idea how I got pregnant either. I don't even really remember doing anything with you. Just Richard and--"

She gasped quietly and prayed he didn't hear the last word.

"A-and?" He said concerned. "Lois…was there someone _else_?"

She found it curious why he seemed so much more disturbed by another man that happened so many years ago and barely gave off a reaction to her current affair.

"It's not what you think." She ducked down her head disgracefully.

"Did you have someone else when we were together?"

"No I--"

"Lois why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"I just--"

"Do you remember who he is?"

"No but--"

"Lois did you _ever _love me?"

"I was _raped_!"

That shut him up, and was even enough to force him to slightly stagger backwards.

She breathed in deeply trying to look away from his pained expression.

"…When?" Was all he managed to whisper.

"A few days after you left." She gulped sharply, she had accepted what had happened to her a long time ago, it was simply part of her painful past. For him, it seemed to be a shock.

"When--when you first left, I thought it was because you didn't love me. But you weren't _anywhere_, you hadn't been seen saving anyone from anywhere in days." She cleared her throat dreading to tell him the rest. "I was out late one night, actually I was looking for you…and I didn't--see him. The streets were deserted so, it… it just happened." Finally she let the tears creep out of her eyes.

"And I screamed and I screamed for you! But _you didn't come_! And that's when I knew…you were gone."

She sniffed. "Because even if you didn't love me, I knew you would have _never_ let that happen."

She had been avoiding his eyes but finally looked up at him and her mouth fell open.

He was actually crying. A few tears trickled down his cheeks staring at her shamefully.

Lois Lane had brought the man of steel to tears. She hadn't _meant _to hurt him, just reassure him that her love was real.

"I'm sorry," he said lightly. "I wish I never left."

His expression was filled with indescribable grief and agony.

She took his hand and tried to free him from his misery by giving him a warm passionate kiss.

But then tore herself away when she heard the familiar ambulance siren outside the window.

"They need you, you have to go."

He'd probably heard the crises long before she heard the siren, but he shook his head. "No, I can't leave you now…"

"Go, the world needs you much more than I do."

"No…" It was almost as if he was pleading to stay.

"Please go! I won't forgive myself if someone gets hurt!"

By the distant look on his face, she could tell the matter was getting serious.

"GO!"

With a painful longing last glance, he fluttered out the window.

* * *

**Oooo, Lois has secretes too…How's Clark going to take this? You'll have to wait and see!  
What do you think? I'm really hoping to get reviews for this chapter, as it was one of my longer ones . Hope to update very shortly.**


	10. Everything you want

**Hello again. Particularly long chapter here, I hope I don't bore you. A few things have been explained in this chapter for those of you who were confused. Try to pay attention to what Jason says in this chapter….  
Once gain give amazing thanks to Lostschizophrenic for beta :)! **

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**Chapter ten: Everything you want**

Lois began to avoid Clark like the plague.

He was lucky if he was granted a simple 'hello' or 'goodnight.' But hadn't ever seemed to be blessed enough for Lois to stare him directly in the face. If she was forced to be anywhere near his presence, her eyes would cast downwards and ignored his apologetic glances.

The last few weeks remained the same. The bitter cold snow had finally arrived in Metropolis, every corner had a Santa Clause merrily ringing charity bells, the malls were busy with last minute Christmas shoppers trying to find 'the gift' on sale and every child was restless with excitement and of course on their best behaviour for the big man in the red suit to fulfill their Christmas list.

Although all this great joy was circling the world, Clark was left behind from the cheer wagon feeling downright dreary. The Holiday Spirit wasn't enough to take all his guilt, hurt, confusion and regret away.

He hadn't particularly had any confrontation with Lois, not even as Superman would he have the courage to speak to her again. His mind couldn't function right anymore, he just stayed focused on the night he'd found out about Lois's scaring past. He completely blamed himself, if only he'd waited a few more days before leaving he could have saved her, if only he'd said goodbye she never would have been out that night in the first place, if only he'd never left at all….

_If only, if only. _If only he could rewind the past five years and start again. But he couldn't change anything now, though the scene sent chills down his back. The mere thought that Lois had been raped as she screamed for him absolutely tortured his mind.

But she'd seem to have gotten over it now, five years is a long enough time to forget things. Forget things Superman, and forget Clark. She'd moved on and he wrecked it. And what did he have to show for it? He didn't even really have a friendly relationship with her as Clark anymore. She felt too ashamed for her actions on the rooftop to even speak to him. Then of course there was the moment he accidentally blurted out having the knowledge of Jason's true paternity. He worried most about how he was going to explain _why_ and _how_ he knew, but never got opportunity. Lois had never particularly gone into those subjects. She never said a word to him about his glasses, which he knew Lois was smart enough to realize they were phony, yet she hadn't questioned him. She hadn't asked how he was able to save her from Luther's goons at the warehouse; she didn't ask how he got her the hospital so fast when she was shot, she didn't ask about the strange picture she found while unintentionally snooping around in his apartment, she'd never even asked about how Luther knew where his apartment was in the first place. Leaving such mysteries unknown was completely out of character for her. There was a reason she was avoiding those questions. Maybe it was because she had so much on her mind recently and didn't want to bother with the obscurities of Clark Kent, maybe it was because if she questioned his lifestyle she would lose the only normal friend she'd ever had, or maybe it was because on some subconscious level…_she knew_.

With Christmas only a few days away, Clark was desperate to find a way to re-establish a relationship with Lois. Neither Clark Kent nor Superman had seen a Christmas in five years, and the best possible Christmas gift he could get, was to see Lois smile again.

"Kent!" Perry barked him out of his daydreams. "Do me a favour will you?"

A favour, for Perry? This couldn't be pleasant…

"S…sure Chief. What can I do?"

"Try some of this will you?" Perry held out a plastic water bottle of what seemed to some kind of liquid.

"What is it?"

"It's a new energy drink, my sister is helping to fund a company that's trying to develop a "Super drink."

"Super drink?"

" It's supposed to be some gimmick to get people to waste their good money on products inspired by the return of Superman. I think it's ridicules really., but she asked me to give it to a few people around work to see if they like it. Would you try?"

Clark shrugged, he couldn't help but find it amusing that merchandise was being created after his work. Actually he found it surprising that people didn't try to make money off him sooner.

"Sure, super drink eh?" He took the bottle from Perry and the very moment the liquid entered his mouth it began to burn.

"What to do you think? I hear the secrete is that they mix it around with all those meteorites." Before he could spit most of the fluid back up out all over his desk it slid down his throat leaving a fiery trail behind.

"K-kryptonite?" He wheezed stubbing over; he could feel the toxin mixing around in his stomach.

"Well yeah, if your Superman." Perry said doubtfully. "Was it really that bad?"

"I…I think I'm going to be sick…"

He whorled around clumsily towards the restroom and dipping his head down over the toilet he hurled, a mass of green and red slid out of his mouth. How could he have been so stupid? He simply thought the color made no difference, just food coloring. It figures, the drink would be inspired by Superman but if Superman actually drank the thing it would kill him.

"What's wrong with Clark?" Lois's concern was comforting, yet it seemed lost and small.

"He's in the--" Perry began.

"Oh no! Perry you didn't give him that drink did you? I told you it was disgusting!" She scolded him; it was refreshing to hear her temper flare again.

"It's not that bad--"

"It's all over his desk! Jesus, go see if he's alright Jimmy." She ordered.

He could hear Jimmy's footsteps outside, he didn't have a choice. He would have to pull himself together and survive the rest of the afternoon.

"You okay Clark?"

He could feel the bitter tasting burn of the kryptonite in his mouth, his stomach bubbled and churned.

"F-fine Jimmy. Just a little queasy, be…be right out."

The remainder of the afternoon was awful; he sat at his desk trying to concentrate on his work, but had absolutely no success because of the reoccurring trips to the rest room. Had really only consumed a small amount of the poison but it still seemed to give off strong effects in his system.

Lois, who often gave him small glances of worry, had still refused to speak to him. Perry, who was often to stubborn to perform such an act of courtesy, kept apologizing having no idea how his drink could have made him so sick with only a small mouthful.

And of course even when Jason arrived he had that suspicious look in his eye too.

"Mr. Clark, you don't look so good. Mommy says you're sick…"

"I-I'm okay Jason."

"Your voice sounds funny too. Is it sore? Why don't you just go home if you're sick?"

It wasn't as if he had somewhere to go, since Lois had occupied his apartment he spent most of his time at work our out scouting the skies. And even started _sleeping_ at the _Planet_…

_I could always go home. Go to Smallville…_

The possibility of spending Christmas with his mother in Smallville didn't seem like such a horrible idea, he rather be there then stuck in an office for Christmas.

Everyone had gone home to their families, only he and Lois remained at their desks putting in a few extra hours before the holidays. Jason was silently nodding off in the corner while Lois scurrile kept herself busy.

"Mommy can we go home _now_?" Jason begged, repeating for about the fifth time.

"Soon sweetheart, mommy just wants to get a few more things done…"

Clark turned his attention to the blank computer screen; he was supposed have a story finished for Perry

by tomorrow morning and barely had down a beginning sentence.

For the first time in a long time his body felt tired, his eyes were droopy and his head was spinning. He didn't know how much longer the drink would affect him, but the room just kept spinning causing him to feel dizzier and dizzier….

"Clark!"

His eyes shot open when he realized he was laying flat down on the floor with Lois hovering overhead of him.

"Clark, can you hear me? Are you alright?"

"Wh-what…?"

"You passed out." She said trying to assist him to his feet.

"Mr. Clark your sick you should be at home!" Jason scampered to his side and scolded him gently.

"I…I had to finish…" He said attempting to defend himself for his actions. He was woozy and found it hard to think straight, although he did find it pleasing that Lois had finally spoken to him again.

"Perry's story can wait! You should be resting, look…" She placed a warm hand on his forehead. "You're hot Clark."

"I'm w-what?"

"You're boiling up, come on I'll drive you home."

"Actually, I'm going to Smallville tonight."

"Well you certainly in no condition to drive, you can barley stand." He didn't notice how unbalanced he was until Lois secured him.

"You can go tomorrow if you're feeling better," She talked down in a motherly hushed voice. "I'll take you home now."

"I don't…" He swallowed shakily gaining up the courage to admit that he didn't exactly have a home.

"I don't have anywhere, right now…"

She raised her eyebrows at him. "You haven't got an apartment Clark?"

He shook his head shamefully. "Not exactly, I'm going to my mother's for the holidays--"

"Are you at a hotel?"

"No…" Truthfully he hadn't had the chance to gain a lot of money in the short time since his arrival, and the little amount that he did have was spent on Lois's care.

"Where have you been living all this time!?"

"A-around…here…"

"You mean the office?"

"You live at your work Mr. Clark?" Even Jason seemed to find his predicament abnormal.

"Really Clark if you needed somewhere to stay that badly why didn't you ask me?"

"Well you've been going through a lot--"

"That doesn't matter I can still help you. You--" She seemed hesitant to offer. "You can stay with me." But answered firmly. "I'm sure my… _landlord_, won't mind."

"I…I don't know." What was he doing? The woman of his dreams was asking him to spend the night with her and he actually had to think twice about it. At this point he didn't have much to lose.

"Come on Clark."

_One night couldn't hurt…_He thought trying to convince himself.

"…Alright." He caved at last.

He was unexpectedly given a smile. "Let's go then, come on Jason."

"But your work--"

"Can wait, _you _come first Clark." He couldn't help but feel heart warmed by her sentiment.

She gently assisted him towards the elevator with Jason trailing behind, scanning him carefully.

"Mr. Clark why are you sick?"

"Everybody gets a little sick sometimes hunny…" Lois answered.

But Jason shook his head doubtfully. "But not Mr. Clark…"

"Were you allergic to something inside that drink Perry gave you Clark?"

"Yeah." He answered simply.

"Agh, I told Perry not give you any of that. It tasted horrible, I bet Superman would be ashamed having something so grotesque 'inspired' by him."

"Probably…" He laughed somewhat uncomfortably as they stood side by side, Lois latched her arm in his keeping him steady.

"Erm…Clark." Oh no, here it came.

"I'm very, very sorry about how I've treated you the last little while." Her voice was barley in a whisper, partly wanting to keep Jason oblivious to grown up problems, and partly because she was embarrassed.

"What I did, wasn't…appropriate…I was very confused…and you were there…"

"L-Lois." He didn't want to go down that road again; he wanted everything to just feel good for a change.

"You don't have to apologize, or feel bad. I completely understand and I just really hope that we can still be friends."

Her smile seemed touched by his immediate understanding. "Good, because…. that's what I really want."

* * *

"I was starting to worry that you wouldn't come back." 

He didn't respond he just stared at her blankly.

"I've been meaning to talk to you." She sighed; it had been an exhausting night.

"I've been thinking everything over, and I was wondering if you think that we…we could ever make it."

"You mean…be together? I really don't know…" He answered regretfully.

She was relived when Superman came knocking on her window, she knew he hadn't exactly made the most glamorous exit the last time they spoke, but she was just grateful that he didn't leave again. Truthfully the possibility nagged at her mind that he may just take off again. She had to mentally and emotionally prepare herself for that situation in case was to leave. She refused to fall apart again, but her mind and heart suffered knowing she could never put her complete trust in him again.

"I have a lot of doubts," His eyes removed themselves from the floor as she spoke.

"I know it's not your fault, but you have an entire world to take care of. Your really an amazing person, you're a great dad to Jason, you've helped us out so much. I'll never be able to thank you enough, I know you care about me a-and I care about you too but--" She didn't quite know how to word it.

"Why are you saying these things?" She could tell by the expression on his face that he was preparing himself for something unpleasant.

"Because of a four year old girl."

"What are you--" His mind clicked when he found the answer. "Oh…"

"Oh? Is that really all you have to say?"

He straightened up. "You find out about these things awfully quickly." He smiled slightly.

"It's my job to know these things." She didn't like his playful approach; she had been heartbroken when she found out about Amanda.

"Amanda Wigs was only four years old. That's a year younger then my--_our_ son." She began firmly. "And it's my fault she is dead."

"It is not--"

"She died in a horrible car crash a few weeks ago." She refused to be interrupted until her point was across, and recited parts of the article she'd written on the incident.

"Her parents and fourteen year old brother were spared, because Superman was able to come to the rescue just in time to save them. However, Amanda was not so lucky. Because before Superman arrived she'd already very painfully left this world."

"Loi-"

"Do not interrupt me." She couldn't let his kindness seep into her heart when she knew that she about to break his fragile heart. "The car was mangled when it faced a head on collision with a drunk driver. The fire and ambulance department arrived shortly after and were forced to listen poor Amanda's screams of terror and pain, for she was still conscious for five terrifying moments in the car while the fire from the explosion melted off her skin." Her voice cracked slightly. "Amanda's funeral was last week, her body was nothing but charcoal."

She finished. And let her statement sink in to Superman as his face fell.

"The day it happened was the day you came to see Jason, it was the day I kissed Clark and it was the day for the first time you doubted my love for you."

After a moment of eerie silence she informed him "You can speak now."

"…What am I supposed to say?" He responded calmly. "I'm sorry."

"Well, it's not your fault. Do you know why Amanda is dead…Superman?" She didn't favour calling him that; she knew there was an anonymous name behind that shield.

He waited for her to answer the rhetorical question.

"She is dead because you couldn't get to her in time. And why couldn't you get there in time? Because of where you were. Now please answer where you were at the time Amanda's short term of life on this planet ended."

"Here…with you."

"Precisely. Now tell me…did you happen to hear Amanda's screams? And remember, you can't lie."

"…Yes. I did."

She nodded. "Now usually you being, well _you_, you would take off faster then a bullet at the slightest whimper for help. And when you heard this poor little girl's blood curdling screams, you didn't leave the spot you stood frozen in. But that wasn't your fault, you were distracted. What were you distracted by?"

He didn't answer.

"Or more of, _who_ were you distracted by?"

"Not you--"

"Yes me. It is because I was talking about my pain that some else suffered. Someone else died. If you hadn't been talking to me Amanda would be safely tucked away in her bed right now, and alive."

"Lois Lane you can not blame yourself for my…choice."

"Choice?"  
"It was my decision to stay with you when you needed it most. Lois I was too shocked to do anything when I heard about your…history."

"But she's dead…she's dead because I opened up to you. She's dead because I was talking about my problems to you when you were needed somewhere else. She's dead and I can't fix it. If we ever tried to make 'us' work, how many other people will die just so we can be together?"

She could see the hurt in his eyes. "I can't save everyone. No matter how much I want to, I can't. And I know that."

"No you can't, but you could save a lot more people without me standing in your way."

"You were not standing in my way. I had the opportunity to leave if I wanted. But I couldn't Lois, it wasn't your fault. It was because it hurt so much that you had to experience something that could have been easily prevented if I was there. I wasn't there, and I was so afraid if I left you again at that moment, something else could have happened."

"You heard her yelling and you still stayed!"

"I left you left you! I left you for far too long and I didn't want to leave you again!"

"Shh!" She disciplined sharply and whispered. "Jason and Clark are sleeping."

Poor Clark had had an awful night. She'd heard him get up several times to throw up in the washroom; his condition hadn't seemed to improve all night. He'd insisted he sleep in the very small second bedroom as not to disturbed Lois and Jason. At one point she got up and offered to take him to the hospital but he declined and said he'd probably feel better by morning. She couldn't help thinking about what exactly he'd been allergic to in Perry's drink. There wasn't anything totally unusual in it, just a normal power drink. Though he did mention it had been mixed with Kryptonite. People would do anything to make money, even use materials from another planet. Unfortunately Clark's reaction wasn't what disturbed her most; it was that he still refused to take off his glasses. She didn't want to say anything; it would be awfully rude after all. But it still swirled around at the back to her mind trying to come to a conclusion.

_Maybe he wore them when he was a child and his vision got better and simply didn't feel comfortable without his glasses? _

_Maybe those glasses have some sort of sentimental value, like a charm bracelet or necklace?_

_Maybe he has some terrible scar on his face he'd trying to hide?_

All possibilities seemed unlikely. However it didn't really concern her much anyway; she wasn't going to throw his friendship away over a pair of glasses. Everybody was entitled to a few secretes.

Right now he was sick and needed her help, that was all that mattered.

She turned her attention back to Superman.

"You know the worst part all of this is that she was in the same situation I was."

"What do you mean?"

"When I was raped I didn't give up hope for a second that you wouldn't come. I knew if I just kept screaming and screaming and held on just a little longer you would save me. That any minute you'd take me up into your arms and make everything go away." She began to explain. "Now Amanda and her family were in the same situation, while they were in such terror there was a part of their brain that was thinking about you. They'd probably heard of all your 'work' and were reassured that any minute Superman would drop in and everything would be okay. Amanda had probably seen you on T.V, she probably wanted to marry a great guy like you. Her brother probably admired you and secretly whished he and had Superman powers too. What every child in the world wants is to be you. And so when they were in danger they probably thought 'Superman is back! Were going to be okay! He'll save us!' They probably had complete faith in you, like I did." She paused, her next line would be the no going back point. She could just drop her rant now and spare his feelings, but he needed to hear this. "And the worst part is when you don't show. When their last thought is that you never came. Amanda's family is probably very angry at you. You go off saving all these other people yet you couldn't come in time to save their daughter. What makes them so different? Why couldn't you save her? Why did she have to die? Why not someone else who you tried to save? They believed so much in what you were doing and finally when they were in need you couldn't come through."

She was slowly shattering his heart piece by piece and she felt terrible for doing so.

"Listen I'm really not trying to make you feel bad. I'm trying to give you a perspective on how the world sees you. I'm just trying to say that you can't put me ahead of billions of other people."

She knew he'd be speechless at this point, surprisingly he didn't even try to say anything at all.

It was then when she realized Superman didn't' appear in his professional standing up straight manner as usual, he seemed weary and she noticed he couldn't stand perfectly still, that he somewhat swayed back and forth. His face was pale, and the usual warmth that his body generated seemed cooler.

"Are you…alight?"

"I…I don't know."

"Come on, come sit down." She helped him over to the small couch and seemed to relax.

"Are you saying we can…never?"

"No, I'm saying just…not anytime soon."

He stared directly at the floor in front of him "Did you say Clark was here?"

Damn. Like mentioning Clark was just a great way to make him feel better. "Yes…he's kind of sick. He didn't have anywhere to go so…I know this is your apartment and I really suppose I should have before inviting anyone."

"Do you love Clark more then me?" He said startlingly, completely ignoring her pathetic apology.

She selected her words very cautiously. "I know who Clark is. I know what to say to him, I've seen him at his shyest, and at his bravest. I like Clark…a lot. But you know I would love you just as much probably even more, but I don't know you."

"…If I told you who I was, do you think we would have a chance?"

She was taken aback. He actually seemed to be considering telling her! She'd whished and dreamed about this moment and hoped she wouldn't blow it.

"Well a lot more of a chance then we do now."

For a second he looked intently at her, examining her body as the idea seemed to be rolling around in his head, but shook his head regretfully.

"It's just not worth it. I won't see you or Jason get hurt over my carelessness."

Her heart fell, if it wasn't for his damn over protectiveness of them.

"I see…" She placed her hand on his and felt it tremble. "Your hand…were you exposed to any Kryptonite recently?"

"Uh…y-yeah." She found it quite startling to hear him stutter and talk with such timidity. "I have to go." She watched him stand up slowly and head for the window.

She nodded, "You'll be okay though right?"

"Yes. I'll be fine."

"And you will…come back?" She said needing the reassurance that he wouldn't desert his family again.

" I will. I promise."

* * *

"Mommy, mommy look at all the snow!" Jason excitedly bounced up and down with joy pointing outside the apartment window. 

"It certainly is quite a blizzard…"

"Were going to have the whitest Christmas ever!" Her son was proud to see a big fluffy white blanket of snow spread itself all over Metropolis Christmas eve.

"Yes, this Christmas will certainly be one to remember…"

First Christmas without. First Christmas without turkey dinner. First Christmas in five years without Richard. First Christmas ever, spent with Clark.

Her life was changing, and she knew it would never be the same again.

"Will Santa know to come to Superman's apartment?"

'Santa Clause' wasn't exactly going to be spending much of his schedule here delivering presents. Lois couldn't afford a tree, couldn't really afford dinner either, it would be Chinese take out. She spent virtually all her money on a few presets for Jason and her family. Who did she blame for money issues? When she went to the bank last week she learned that Richard had emptied all of her accounts and transferred the money to his. Richard schemed her again. Of course she had no access to them, he really had dealt with all the financial business when they were together. They were supposed to have been getting married after all; she'd just made the stupid mistake of trusting him. She would have to wait until next months payday until she could provide for Jason properly again. And perhaps rent a more _comfortable_ apartment.

"Yes Santa will know where to go, remember he knows everything."

"And he flies in a sled with reindeer right? Do you think he and Superman go flying sometimes?"

The thought of both the two most loved people in the world flying together made Lois chuckle.

"Well maybe. You can ask Superman that."

"Mr. Clark is staying with us too right?"

It's not like she was just going to through him out onto the streets. He hadn't wanted to impose on them and offered to go stay with his mother but she insisted that he stay. Though it was a few days later, Clark's condition had just begun to improve. Whatever effect Perry's drink imposed on him had lasted several days. Thankfully this morning when he said he needed to do some last minute Christmas shopping she'd seen his smile light up the room again. It was pleasing to see him up and his old klutz self again when he tripped while Lois walked him down the six flights of stairs.

She on the other hand had managed to finish up all her Christmas shopping yesterday, though the entire day was spent dragging Jason around the mall looking for only two gifts. One for Clark and one for Superman.

Clark's gift didn't take as long she knew he had almost virtually nothing but a few suits for work and a few jeans here and there. Only a few items were packed tightly into a simple suitcase that he'd kept hidden in the back room for the past few days.

For Clark she could buy everything.

Though Superman was quite the opposite, the mother challenge of all Christmas gift receivers.

What do you buy a Superman? What could Lois give him that nobody else could?

They searched for hours for the perfect gift, but were unsuccessful.

"Yeah."

"So Mr. Clark and daddy will be here? Oh boy this will be so fun!"

"No Jason…daddy won't be here for Christmas this year…" She tried as hard as she could to break it to him gently.

"What? Why not? Where's he going?"

"Nowhere, he's just…got a lot of work to do."

"I haven't seen daddy in a long time now. When is coming to visit?"

Prier to this, Lois had explained to her son that she and Richard weren't going to be living together anymore. He actually took that part pretty well, but didn't seem to like the idea of not spending time with his father on Christmas.

"Not for awhile hunny."

He frowned "I miss him a lot. Can I make him a picture?"

Lois nodded. "Sure, I think he'd like that."

"I'll draw you and me and--" He stopped to rethink. "I don't think daddy likes Superman."

"No." Was all she could say.

"Only bad guys don't like Superman…" Jason concluded miserably.

She tried to keep his mind off the topic of Richard. "Hey you know what, maybe Superman will come visit tomorrow?" After all, she didn't think he'd miss seeing his son's Christmas for the first time.

He shook his head in disagreement. "He can't, not if Mr. Clark is going to be here."

"Well Jason, Clark is a very good friend. And he knows that you like Superman a lot, he won't mind if--"

"No I mean he can't. He can't be in two places at once."

"Jason what are you talking about?" Lois said puzzled.

"I'm back." Came a weary voice from the door, she turned her attention from Jason and greeted a wet, snowy Clark.

"Gosh it's really snowing out there."

"Mr. Clark can we go to the park and make a snow man?" Jason leaped up off the couch at his brilliant idea.

"I would love to take you Jason, but I think I better get going--"

"It's really quite bad weather Clark…maybe you should just stay until tomorrow morning?" She had to muster up every ounce of courage to ask him to stay longer. "I mean…traffic might not be so bad in the morning. And Jason really enjoys your company…"

"Oh…well I suppose it couldn't hurt to leave tomorrow."

"Yay!" Jason bounded over and quickly whipped on his winter jacket. "Let's go to the park, Mr. Clark!"

* * *

"Wake up! Wake up Mr. Clark! Santa came!" 

"Jason shhhhh! Be quiet!" Lois scolded softly. "Come on let Clark sleep."

With a groan and cheery smile to greet them Clark sat up replied "It's alright Lois, I'm awake."

"I'm sorry, Jason is exited--"

"Come _on_ Mr. Clark! Get up Santa brought presents for you too!" For only a few moments Jason stopped bouncing up and down like a spring and asked inquisitively "You--sleep with your glasses on?"

"Oh, well I was reading last night…must have forgotten to take them off…"

"Oh…okay!" Thankfully five year olds didn't get as suspicious like adults.

Jason could wait no longer and bolted off into the living room with pure glee.

"Sorry again Clark…are you feeling alright this morning?" She hesitantly sat down beside him on the bed messaging his back gently.

"Oh--yuppers. Spirit of Christmas is the b-best medicine there can be."

"Will you…be heading up to your mothers today?" Lois asked carefully, hoping not to scare him off.

"Well I suppose so--"

"At least stay for the morning." She offered quickly. "Jason's is thrilled that you're going to be here for Christmas."

"Oh--okay, I guess I will stay…for Jason after all--"

"Great!" She sprang to her feet. "I'll make you some coffee."

"Wow! Mommy, mommy!" Jason beckoned "You've got to come see this!"

Lois strode out into the tiny living room and was stunned to see presents covering the entire floor and a giant glowing center piece.

"Clark, how did you do this?" Lois gaped at the massive green evergreen tree that touched the roof practically buried in dazzling sparkling decorations.

"Me? I didn't do it…"

"Maybe it was Santa and Superman!"

"Well whoever did, brought an amazing tree, it looks like it came straight out of a fairy tale."

"Wow mommy, look at all this food! And a whole box of candy canes!"

Turkey, cranberry sauce, chicken, potatoes an entire Christmas feast lay out on the table.

Lois would play along for now in front of Clark and Jason but she knew the truth, Superman came through again. Superman brought them Christmas.

She turned around to see Clark beaming with joy as he whispered quietly. "Merry Christmas Lois."

* * *

"Open this one next Mr. Clark, it's from me!" 

Lois hadn't seen Jason so thrilled and energetic for a long time.

The entire day was like a dream, everything was so perfect.

Lois had been watching, just watching her son and Clark together. Memories of Richard had flooded into her mind, it was never so peaceful like this with him. There was always something unsettling with him at Christmas time, actually last year Richard had taken a business trip to New York and spent Christmas there.

But Clark was so much different. He'd helped Lois cook supper, he'd helped Jason put together all his new "Lego" action sets, he'd told them both hilarious Christmas stories from his child hood and even bought Jason and Lois a few Christmas gifts.

It was everything she wanted. _He _was everything she wanted.

She watched as Clark carefully unwrapped Jason's masterpiece.

"Do you like it? I drew you without your glasses at first, but mommy said you looked funny so I put them on."

"Gosh Jason you're an excellent artist…" She watched him inspecting the tiny picture of Jason and Clark.

"I love it! You d-drew your mother very pretty."

Jason beamed proudly, but Lois crossed her arms curiously. This was the first time in weeks that Jason had drawn a picture without Superman in it. "No Superman this time Jason?"

"But I did draw Superman mommy, he's--"

"Lois, I think something's burning in the kitchen." Clark interrupted instantly.

She inhaled and the scent of smoke filled her nose. "Oh gezz your right Clark!" She rushed to the kitchen to attend to her cooking and forgot about Jason's silly picture.

Lois was never particularly gifted at cooking, even though the turkey was a little dry, and the chicken was…overcooked, as Clark had gently put it, Christmas dinner was wonderful.

Lois had convinced Clark to stay the rest of the evening because of the raging blizzard outside.

"It's really not safe to be driving in this weather."

"I was going to…fly."

"A plane? Surely all the flights will be cancelled in this weather. Come on Clark, it's really alright if you stay. Jason and I don't mind, we certainly can't eat all this by ourselves. You can phone your mother if you like."

"No it's not that, I just don't want to interrupt your family time…"

"Family? I've known you for years Clark, you practically are family--"

Oops. That didn't come out right. She'd been terrified she'd scared him away.

"Really?" He said, quite astonished.

"Of…course."

"Alright then," He paused. "As long as I'm no trouble for you--"

"Not at all."

So there they were, the perfect dinner, the perfect people, the perfect Christmas.

It was simply too good to be true.

'_Knock, knock_'

"I wanna get the door mommy!" Jason scurried off to the door while Lois quickly fallowed behind.

"…Who are you guys?"

Jason had already burst open the door. And to Lois's fear and confusion, she saw two policemen standing wet and cold with grim faces.

"Excuse me Miss, were looking for someone who goes by the name of Clark Kent, is he around?"

"Uh…yeah." At the call of his name Clark quickly came to investigate what was going on. "P-problem officers?" He seemed just as surprised as Lois.

With the next few words that came out of the Policeman's mouth had completely ruined the rest of her perfect Christmas.

"Clark Kent you are under arrest…for the murder of Lucy Lane."

* * *

**How's that for a Christmas ending?  
I want to say a few things. First, thank you so much for all the reviews and feedback! But a few of you brought up some good points that needed to be fixed. I hope this chapter has cleared a few things up. But when it comes to Richard fighting for custody of Jason, you will find out why Superman doesn't go to the police or have Richard take a DNA test in the next chapter :)  
Also this 'power drink' actually doesn't belong to me, a similar potion first appeared in season 4 episode 4 of 'Smallville', in case any of you were wondering.  
Chapter inspired by the song "Everything you want" By Vertical Horizon, gives a good feeling of both Lois and Clarks perspective on each other, I recommend it! **


	11. Who says you can’t go home…

**Chapter 11: Who says you can't go home…**

**_The kiddie years…_**

"_Lois! Give me back my doll!"_

"_No! You crashed my bike, Suzy is all mine now."_

"_Lllloooiisss! Okay, okay I'm sooo sorry! Please give me back my doll!"_

"_Only if you do my chores for a whole month and give me your bike."_

"_That's not fair it was an accident and I said sorry. Give me back my Suzy doll now!"_

"_Make me!"_

"_MOM!_

"_DAD!"_

**_The teenage years…_**

"_I got a new sweater today Lucy, you wanna see?"_

"_Yeah, give it here."_

"_You know I heard you and Bobby are going out."_

"_Who told you that?"_

"_Gezz Luce, it's just all around the entire school."_

"_You know, you should get a boyfriend, I hear Eric really likes you…"_

"_High school guys are way too immature for me."_

"_Come on, go out and have a little fun while you're still young! One day you are gonna wake up and have a kid and be married and be all wrinkly and old. Your life will be so over."_

"_That won't be for a long time Luce, plus I bet you'll be married before I will, you _always _get all the great guys…"_

"We're all grown up now sis_…_"

"_Hi Lucy!"_

"_Oh my gosh, Lois you look great!"_

"_Wow, I haven't seen you since Thanksgiving."_

"_Are you staying in town long?"_

"_No I've got to get back to Metropolis in a day or two."_

"_Still putting work before family time Lois? It's okay to take a break you know."_

"_You're too laid back Luce."_

"_So, are you still writing about Super-lover?"_

"_Umm….no, not exactly…"_

" _Are you just like not with him anymore? Did he dump you? Cause if he did I'll--"_

"_No, no….he sort of…disappeared."_

"_Like, left you?"_

"_No…never mind…can we just not talk about this anymore?"_

"_Lois you've got to open up and talk about this stuff once in awhile."_

"_Will you help me cook the Christmas dinner?"  
"Don't change the subject Lois, although yes, I want to make sure you don't burn the turkey this year."_

"_Oh yeah, mom ended up feeding the entire thing to the dog last year."_

"_You've got to let me come over and teach you to cook more than a microwave dinner. Find time in your busy schedule to spend time with your sis alright?"_

"_Yeah, yeah…"_

"_No, come on Lois. We only see each other like a few times a year. Promise this year will be different?"_

"_Okay, I promise."_

"_Lois, let me take you home-"_

"_Wah for? I'm havin' a party right here sis." Lois's words were slurred and jumbled. "'Sides, it's not like I have a 'home' to go home toooo…." _

"_Lois you really--"_

"_Chill Luce, I'm cooool. I unlike you have already called a--" Hick! "…cab."_

"_I'll wait with you--"_

"_Go _home _Lucy!" _

* * *

Hot tears trickled down Lois's cheeks as dozens of memories played a slideshow through her mind. She pressed a small stack of Kodak pictures against her chest; these precious photos were the last remainder of proof that she once had a sister. 

Her heart ached, she felt dark empty hole from the loss of her closest family member.

"_I'll wait with you--"_

"_Go home Lucy!"_

The last few words she would ever say to her sister. Lois was known for pushing people out of her life because of her selfish pride, but this time she pushed Lucy out of her life for good. She felt disgraceful for having such a blurry haze of memories of their last moments together from all the alcohol that night.

Lucy was _gone._

"You promised to teach me how to cook…" She whispered to herself weakly. The last few hours of Christmas were spent trying to comfort her hysterically crying son. Jason was devastated as he watched someone he'd grown so close to as a friend, be dragged away in hand cuffs for killing his favourite aunt, on Christmas day. Her life was turning into a dramatic and horrifying soap opera.

"Approximate time death, December 24th between 3:00 and 4:00pm." Was the report from the police she spent all evening on the phone to, getting details of Lucy's death. Apparently Lucy's neighbour heard screaming and banging coming from her apartment and called the police. When they arrived, all that remained was her trashed bedroom and butchered body.

Out of all the pain she'd been put through these last few hours, the very idea that Clark would have anything to do with her sister's death was the most agonizing thought of all.

But Lucy's time of death had determined Clark's verdict. Lois let a shower of relief sooth her battered heart, it was about one o'clock Christmas eve when Clark, Jason and herself headed off to the park and didn't come home until about four. They spent the entire day together playing with Jason in the snow and even saw a movie afterwards, she recalled it was Clark's first trip he'd taken to a cinema in five years and she found it amusing that through all his travels he never bothered to catch flick.

Lois specifically remembered the time because she usually gave Jason his inhaler at about one o'clock, but Jason hadn't recently been giving off the symptoms of asthma so she decided he wouldn't need it.

But it rattled her brain, the exact moment that Lucy was being ruthlessly murdered, they were out building a snowman…

The point was, she could now prove Clark's innocence because he was with her the entire time, and he had a full alibi. She could bail him out, with the assistance of her father, and testify in court later. It was that stupid wallet of his; Lois blamed everything on that annoying wallet he'd lost at the warehouse. That felt such a long time ago now, though that mischievous case of brown leather seemed to be constantly coming back to haunt them.

It was found near Lucy's body and was more than enough evidence to take him in.

He'd been framed, possibly by Luther…but that didn't really make sense. Why would Luther want to have Clark Kent put away? Why would Luther want Lucy dead?

"God Luce…you didn't dragged into this big mess did you?"

She understood him now. She understood why Superman had tried so hard to keep her out of danger, tried so hard to keep his life a secret, tried so hard to protect her. A person she cared about was dead. The connection from Luther, to Richard, to her, to Superman. Yet innocent people like her sister, Clark and even Jason would always be put in danger because of connections. She understood his desperate need for overprotection now, for she felt the same way trying to protect her own family.

So now what? Her parents and family had just received the tragic news of Lucy's loss, and right now during the holidays it would be virtually impossible to get in contact with the right people to get to the bottom of Lucy's death. So what was her main mission now? Get Clark out of jail. She reluctantly flipped open her cell phone and punched a familiar memorized number.

"Dad? It's me…I have a little favour to ask…."

* * *

"Hey, buddy, wanna cigarette?" 

"I don't smoke." Clark replied sternly and turned back around to lean on the cold, steel bars that separated him from the rest of the world.

"You sure?" The fat, bald thug pressed on.

"I got some other stuff too, you can try it for free. I know a guy that can get you the really good stuff for a great price--"

"I do _not_ want drugs either." He said not even bothering to disguise his voice to the rebel.

"Fine, suit yourself, but just in case you change your mind I'll--"

"NO!" It had almost been forty-two long painful hours of torture, trapped in this tiny room with a cellmate that turned out to be a bothersome druggie.

Actually, Clark recognized the tough tattooed gang member from a mugging a few weeks back. He watched the thug finely give up and stretch his massive body out across the bench of the cell and tried to focus his thoughts on coming up with a plan to get himself out of jail, and fast. But the last few hours had proved to be unsuccessful; he couldn't concentrate on anything except the last hateful glance he'd seen from Lois before finding his fate in a metal cage.

"_No, no, no! You can't take Mr. Clark! No, no it's Christmas! Mr. Clark please don't go!"_

Jason pleading voice echoed of the walls of his mind. The second he'd been arrested tears streamed down Lois's face at the realization of her sister's death. Clark couldn't figure out how or why he was being accused, the police wouldn't give him any details. But he did know whatever happened next had to happen fast so he could set everything right with Lois again.

_It would be so easy…._Temptation's voice whispered in his ears. He could snap the metal bars like toothpicks, but he didn't have that ability right now, he wasn't Superman now, as far as the guard that sat at his desk humming Christmas carols knew, he was just bumbling, geeky Clark Kent wanted for murder.

"Right this way Miss…"

Clark suddenly heard the familiar clicking of heels scrape across the tiled floor as another police officer came around the corner and glared at both the two men in the cell as he counted a set of keys and jammed one into the lock in front of Clark.

"You can go."

"Hey alright, is my probation officer finally here?" The thug cried out hopefully.

"Not you Bernie." The officer corrected, obviously 'Bernie' had earned himself a reputation against the law.

"Mr. Kent, you can go." The door swung squeakily open.

"Me?" He wondered. "How? Who did--"

"Are you okay?" His eyes darted towards a red puffy face trying to strain back a salty lake of tears.

"Lois--"

He barley had time to express his surprise before she wrapped two arms around his waist and wept.

"Are you okay…?" She repeated, her voice was muffled as she buried her face in his chest and sniffed.

"Hey…who's the hot broad? Hey sweetie you can cry on me. Bernie will make ya feel better."

Lois didn't remove her face but tightened her grip around his waist as Clark looked over at Bernie and gave him a cold deathly stare.

"I'm just fine…" He answered softly. "Did you…pay bail?"

She nodded. "Just half of it though…_she_ wouldn't let me pay all of it…and I'm sorry I couldn't get you out sooner. I had to wait for her flight to come in."

"She? Who else--"

"Clark?" He looked up in automatic obedience.

"…Mom? Lois, you called my _mother_?"

* * *

"More toast, Jason, dear?" 

Jason wiped his mouth on his sleeve smudging blueberry pancake remains on his lips. "Yes please!" He clapped his hands delightfully.

"Anymore coffee Lois?"

She looked up startled. "No…" She answered timidly. "I'm good…"

Lois watched her son marvel over the table covered with delicious breakfast options. Pancakes, toast, eggs, bacon, cereal, pie and even a little leftover turkey super. She had been surprised at Mrs. Kent's astounding culinary skills.

"Don't get shy on me Lois, Clark tells me you're quite the wild fire in the newsroom."

She looked down twiddling and fiddling with her thumbs. "I'm sort of tired this morning…"

Mrs. Kent smiled sympathetically and nodded. "I understand dear, I'm very sorry to hear about sister. How Clark got involved though, I just don't understand."

"Mrs. Kent, I don't think--I _know_," She corrected. "Clark had nothing to do with Lucy's death."

"Ma! I'm finished fixing the tractor, anything else you need me to do?"

The door whipped open with a frosty, cold winter breeze filling the kitchen as a snowy white Clark walked inside. A small smile tugged at the corner of Lois's face when she saw Clark's glasses had completely fogged over geekishly.

"No, no that'll be fine. Come sit and join us." Replied Martha as she motioned her son to close the door.

When Clark offered for Lois and Jason to visit the farm for the remainder of the holidays, she just could not refuse.

"Good morning Lois." Clark greeted cheerful attempting to lighten up her dreary mood.

She simply gave him a nod of response, she felt small, timid and awkward around his childhood home. Even though she knew the truth, she couldn't help but feel somewhat uncomfortable at the fact that he was wanted for her sister's murder.

However, her environment was quite peaceful, a small radio playing last minute Christmas songs filled the air with a cheery melody, a blazing fireplace by snowy window gave off a pleasing sight to the eyes, Jason, Clark even Mrs. Kent felt like a comforting family. This is what Christmas was supposed to feel like; this is what home should feel like.

"Later can we go sledding Mr. Clark?" Jason pressed his face up against the large landscaping window reviling what looked like never-ending winter wonderland.

"Your farm has _so_ much snow, it must take forever to melt away!"

"Sure thing Jason, I even have an old wooden sled I used to use, in the barn."

"Mommy you'll come too right?"

Lois snapped back into reality watching Clarks face eagerly await her answer. "Erm…sure Jason. But first…I need to take a little walk."

"Well it's not hard to find some peace and quiet around here, plenty of acreage for you to roam around on Lois."

She couldn't stay so quiet and locked up shyly for her entire visit. A quick walk to clear her head would fix her up good. She swiftly got up and threw on her winter attire.

"Lois…um...if you want I-I could give you some company…" Clark offered bravely.

She smiled warmly at him. "Thank you Clark but I just need to really be alone right now." She broke gently as his hopeful face fell.

"Just to, clear my head from…everything."

He nodded. "Okay I understand, just don't get lost."

She grinned. "I won't."

As she stepped out the door she heard Mrs. Kent mutter "I think…_someone_ should go talk to her."

* * *

Clark watched the tiny figure down below march through the knee deep snow leaving a trail of footprints as their marked path behind. 

This was a hike that was familiar to his experience. He could recall walking for hours out across the land as a child. Solitude was an emotion well known to him as a teenager.

He listened to Lois's teeth chatter and nose sniffle as soft, white, peaceful snow drifted down around her. He knew by now she'd gotten very cold, but her stubborn pride would refuse to let her turn back until she had every last unsettling thought cleansed.

And _he _could help her to do so. He softly fluttered down behind her and whispered.

"Lois, it's awfully cold outside for you to be wandering out here alone."

She did a half spin half jump around in surprise and grabbed for her heart. "Geez, you scared the hell out of me!"

He gave her a small smile "I'm nothing to be scared of."

She shook her head, almost like pinching herself to wake from a dream. "What are you doing here? How did you know I was here?"

"I--"

"Wait, no, stupid question. Don't answer that." She took a small backtracking step towards him.

"You didn't come see us on Christmas. I wanted to thank you though, for the tree, the supper, the gifts, the--everything."

"I'm very sorry I couldn't see you two. I was sort of busy…and you had company."

"You still should have seen Jason." Her tone sounded somewhat hostile towards him.

But she sighed, "My sister died, she was murdered." Bingo, that's what she was really angry about.

Lois would never just get straight to the point about what was bothering her. But when she did open up, Clark could read her like a book.

"Did you um, happen to…_hear_ her?"

"Actually …no. I didn't really hear much of anything yesterday." She looked away. "I'm sorry I didn't…I wanted to protect you from all of this. Luther must have--"

"It wasn't Luther."

"It…wasn't?"

"I don't think so, I mean…maybe but, I doubt it."

"So you think you know who did do it? I…did hear your friend Clark was arrested for it--"

"Good God no, Clark would never! The man couldn't even kill a spider for me, he had to go gently put it on a piece of paper and walk down nine floors just to put it outside so I wouldn't crush it!" She let out a small smile as she went though these memories but looked back up at him. "Anyway, it wasn't him. I think it might have been…" It appeared hard for her to reveal the suspects name, for finely admitting to herself the painful truth.

"Richard." She finished regretfully.

"Lois…I don't think Richard would go that low. I mean, murder?"

Though Clark knew Richard was perfectly capable of murder, his efforts to comfort Lois were in vain.

She took in a ragged breath. "He has a motive against me, he had Clarks wallet, he even had an emergency key to Lucy's apartment in case she ever got locked out."

"Lois we have to go to the police. You asked me not to last time when Jason disappeared. But someone is dead this time."

"No."

"Lois I know this is hard but-"

"You can't."

"I have to--"

"No Superman, I mean you _can't_!"

Her timidity started to seep away as her temper rose. "I…can't?" He repeated puzzled.

"Well…I suppose you could, but you'd really be screwing over Jason and me…especially poor Jason."

"What do you mean?"

She cleared her throat avoiding his focused gaze. "Richard is aware of Jason's paternity. If you put Richard in jail or frankly, do anything to upset him, all he has to do is say two words to the media."

Damn.

"We can't do anything. He'll tell everyone that your Jason's father.." She whipped her eyes off on her gloves. "He can take Jason away, he can get away with murder and if you try to stop him, he'll tell the entire world about all three of us."

"But…but…"

He couldn't believe it, a dreading feeing took over his body as his mind whizzed around looking for a solution. How could none of this occur to him before? "There must be a way around this."

"There isn't. I've been running it over and over again, there's just no way out." She left him speechless; Richard could do whatever he wanted.

"I won't blame you if you do turn him in. It's your job to put creeps like him away. Jason and I could adjust--"

"Adjust? The entire world would know I have a son. Do you have any idea how much danger I'd be putting you both into?"

She didn't respond but rubbed her arms attempting to warm up.

"But…being outside here in the cold isn't going to help, do you want me to take you back?"

"No, I'm not ready yet."

Silence hung between them before Lois could no longer restrain her burning question. "Where were you exactly on Christmas?"

"Just busy."

"Busy? Is that supposed to reassure me?"

"Reassure you from what?"

"That you didn't spend Christmas at some floozy's house in another country. How many secrete family's do you have?"

He raised his eyebrow. "Where is this coming from?"

"Oh come on, your Superman, we can't be the only family you have. You can do it all, balance out five families at once right?"

"Lois, I swear to you, I am not with anyone else."

"How can I know that? How am I supposed to know I'm not one of twenty women around the world you've knocked up?"

"Lois, I am not _with anyone else_. I would not lie about that."

"You're not supposed to lie at all! But I know you do, everyone dose, and you're a lot more human than you want to admit." Lois dropped her anger and threw down her arms.

"You know I did get _you_ a Christmas present."

He watched her dig around in her deep coat pocket and pull out a small red and green wrapped package.

"Do you always keep presents hidden in your pocket like that?" He said playfully.

"I had to keep it with me, I can't exactly predict when you're going to be…around."

"You don't have to give me anything."

"What? Is Superman too good to accept a measly Christmas present?"

She tossed him the package. "Open it you stubborn buffoon."

His eyes darted up at her anxious face as he carefully unwrapped her gift. Inside he pulled out a golden chain that lead to a tiny locket on the other end, showing a small picture of Lois and Jason.

"I'm sorry if it's too girly or mushy for you. I've just never bought a Superman anything before."

"Lois is so…" He was gratefully mystified at her thought put into his present.

"It's not the best picture of me…god my hair is a mess there. I was hoping that if you did come for Christmas, we could have gotten a more…updated family picture of us." She looked down, doubtful of her gift.

"Lois this is wonderful." He answered sincerely. "I have never gotten anything better."

"Yeah well, you can add it to your collection of stuff from all your other lovers. I just thought this might make me and Jason something a little more special." She was too stubborn to accept the fact of his loyalty, there would be no convincing her today that she was the only women in the universe for him.

"You are something special, you and Jason are one of a kind. You're irreplaceable to me." He knew his words were melting her icy cold heart, so he suggested, "I can take you home now…" He offered his hand.

"No thanks," She said determinedly as she tightened her scarf and folded her arms. "I'd rather walk back."

* * *

**So what did you think? Shorter chapter this time…  
Last chapter made me so sad though, it was actually the longest chapter yet but I received the lowest number of reviews ever : ( Please review? Just so I can know if I'm going in the right direction with this fic or not. I always really appreciate all of your great opinions.  
I /just/ started a "Live journal" So if you want to get to know me, or see up coming previews, ideas, and footnotes on future chapters and such on my work. See my lookup for the link.  
Also give a big huge thanks to _LostSchizophrenic _for the great beta and pointing out all my mistakes (which hopefully I have been able to clear for the good copy for y'all)**

**This chapter title inspired by the song "Who says you can't go home." By Bon Jovi & Sugarland. **


	12. White lie

**Okay big HUUUGGEE thanks and hugs to EVERYONE who reviewed! I was /so/ happy and so inspired when I got more reviews! You guys always make my day!  
And please give Lost schizophrenic a wonderful round of applause for the beta! **

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Chapter 12: White lie**

"Hey Mr. Clark, want a candy cane?" Jason stuck out a sticky limb offering a bright white and red stick of candy.

"No thanks Jason, but you'd better go wash up so we can go tobogganing." Jason shrugged and shoved the cane back into his chocolate covered mouth.

Clark wandered back into the kitchen to find a table completely covered in candies, chocolates, biscuits, cupcakes and other sugary sweets. "You've really been spoiling him haven't you Ma? Lois won't approve of this…"

"Oh lighten up, it's Christmas. She won't mind, I am his grandmother after all. It's my job to spoil him, and besides…I have five years of spoiling to make up for."

"I wish at least you would have known about Jason sooner than I did. I'm sorry you didn't find out until yesterday…"

"Oh Clark, it's water under the bridge, what matters now is that you make sure I get to see my grandson more often."

"I know, don't worry I'll figure out a way…"

"Did you bring Lois back?"

"No, she wanted a little time alone…do you want to see what she gave me?"

He said giddily as he pulled out the tiny locket and placed it in his mother's palm.

"Oh Clark," The chain glimmered and sparkled as she held it up to the light to inspect its beauty.

"Did she really give this to you? When?"

"Just now." He answered proudly.

"Oh…so she didn't give it to you then?"

"Well…no," He admitted as his face fell. "…She gave it to Superman."

Martha pulled out a chair and motioned for him to sit. "Did you talk to her?"

"Yes."

"And?"

"Well…she seems a little upset with me. I did miss Christmas after all."

"When are you going to stop this Clark?" His mother asked in a very disapproving tone.

"Stop what?"

"This charade you keep putting on, you have a child now. You will not be able to keep this a secret forever. When Jason finds out Superman is his father, well that just won't be good enough for him. He needs to know who Superman really is. And I don't think Lois is going to tolerate much more of your silly excuses either."

Clark shifted uneasily; he should have known a lecture like this was coming.

"It's not a surprise she's angry, she has child with a man she doesn't even know or remember doing anything with. I can promise you she's beginning to question her self worth. And don't you think Jason is wondering why he can light Richard's arm on fire?"

"I don't want any of that mom, but if I tell them who I really am it'll just cause more trouble for Lois. I've already dragged them into enough of Superman's problems… Richard is petitioning the courts for custody of Jason."

Confusion and panic imminently swelled up into Martha's eyes. "You can't let him do that Clark, you have to do something."

"I can't! Not without the world finding out that I am Jason's father. Richard knows, and I can't stop him."

Martha sank down into her chair, her face falling slowly while trying to soak up the flood of bad news. "There is…a way you can stop him, without telling everyone the truth."

Her eyes fluttered, while her mind searched for any possible flaw in the plan she seemed to be cooking up.

"There is? What? Tell me Ma, I'll do anything!"

"However you would have to tell Lois and Jason who you are or it just won't work."

"Why? What difference does it make? I don't get it, what do you--"

"Is mommy home yet?"

Both pairs of eyes looked up at the little hobbit that had bounded his way into the kitchen.

"I wanna go sledding soon! When is she coming back?"

"Uh…uh she should be back soon Jason." Clark answered quickly.

"Well how come you don't go fly out and get her?"

"Well because she needed some time to--wha… fly?"

"Yeah, how come you can't go fly out and find her?"

Clark turned around to his mother's puzzled expression.

"Jason," She said curiously. "What exactly do you mean by fly?"

Clark knelt down beside his son, as Jason responded by pointing directly at Clark's chest.

"I know you can fly." He answered innocently. "It's fun, remember when we flew all the way up close to the clouds? Can we do that again!?"

"Jason, I can't fly…"

"Yes you can!" Jason's tiny finger reached out and traced the shape of a giant 'S' across Clark's plaid shirt. "Yes you can, Superman."

Clark's mouth fell open as he heard his mother gasp.

"Clark! I thought you just told me Jason didn't know about your secret?"

"Well he…he doesn't!" He defended himself while Jason's memorized gaze stayed focused on Clark's chest.

"Jason can you see through my shirt? Can you see my…suit?"

"Yeah, can't everybody?"

"Well…no Jason. Can you see through other things too?"

He nodded. "Sometimes. It only happens when I stare really hard at something."

X-ray vision, He concluded. Jason had now proven to have received at least three of Clark's abilities. His mother was right, time was drawing nearer, and Jason would soon have to be told

the truth.

"How long have you been able to do this Jason?"

He shrugged. "Awhile, since daddy went away. But I'm like you though right? You can see through things too! But I thought everybody could…"

How to explain this to a five year old…

"No Jason, you and me are…very special. Only you and I can do these special things, but you have to keep it a secret."

"Is that why you're Mr. Clark sometimes?"

"That's right, I can't ever tell anyone that I'm--Superman." He said at last.

"But your mommy knows your Superman." He tilted his head up at Martha.

"Can I tell my mommy that you're Superman?"

"No, you-"

"What? Why not? Mommy really likes you Superman! And she likes Mr. Clark too so I know she'll love you both as one person." He jumped up eagerly.

"She might like that, but for now you can't say anything to her." He lowered his voice to impose a lasting effect. "You can't tell anyone else either, no matter what. Do you think you can keep our secret?"

"Yes." He nodded confident in his answer. "Maybe I should get special glasses like you!"

Clark smiled as he watched Jason scamper off towards Martha.

"Mrs. Clark's Mommy, do you have any glasses I could borrow?"

* * *

"Wooooow! Mommy this is cooool!" Jason's voice echoed. Clark barely gave him a tap on the back sending him zipping down the steep, snowy hill. "That was so fun!" Jason waved as he came to a halt at the bottom. 

"Climb back up and you can go again!" Lois called down, beaming at Jason's enthusiasm. "I couldn't even tell you how long it's been since I've taken Jason sledding."

"Well I'm glad he's enjoying himself, I remember that my father used to take me down this hill all the time."

"Was it hard growing up without your dad around?"

"Well, I definitely missed him a lot."

She sighed. "I just can't help wondering how growing up without Richard is going to affect Jason later in life."

"Well, isn't his real father around?"

She shrugged. "Not like a real dad should be."

"Wow!" Jason panted dragging up the wooden sled behind him. "Can you push me again?"

"Of course," Clark bent down as Jason planted himself on the wooden seat. "Ready?"

"Yeah, go, go!"

Lois chuckled as Jason once again whizzed down the slop with only a gentle pat.

"You know, you seemed to be enjoying this as much as he is Clark."

"Well Jason is always so cheery and hyper it's hard not to be happy with him."

"Have you ever thought about having your own kids? I mean, if you're this great with Jason, I think you would make a terrific dad."

"Erm, well…before I think about having a child I would have to find the right women to marry first."

He replied shyly, shoving his hands down into his jacket pockets.

"…Okay, Clark….I'm just going to say it."

"Say what Lois?"

She stared up at him with a hint of mischievousness in her face.

"In order for me to get you out of jail so quickly, I had to get my father to pull a few strings. He's a general and I suppose I shouldn't have been misusing his authority but you're my friend." She shifted her feet around in the snow seemingly to be trying to delay her confession. "However, since you were the main suspect of my sister's death, well…frankly my parents wanted nothing to do with you. They wouldn't believe me that you had an alibi. So to convince them to finally believe me, I had to tell a little white lie."

"Okay…what did you say?"

"I told them….that you asked me to-"

"Wooohoo! This is awesome! Push me again Mr. Clark!"

"…Marry you."

* * *

** Shorter chapter again. Pllleeeaaassseeeee review! I love each and every single one of your great inspiring opinions!**


	13. Cold

Wow, it's been what? About 2 weeks? More since I updated? This chapter was very hard to write. I LOVED all the wonderful magnificent reviews! Last time I uploaded by alerts were down /again/ so I am soooooo happy to say that I received the most amount reviews ever on one chapter! Gives you all the "Best reviewers of the year award" If it weren't for /all/ of you and of course **_Lost Schizophrenic _**gives her best Beta of the year award this story would have ended a long time ago. Thanks so much again!

Gives you all wonderful huggles of amazing joy Yay!

Hope you enjoyed for now, please review!: )

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**Chapter 13: Cold**

_It was a fairly warm night; the hot sticky, humid air led Lois not to wear a rain coat. Even though heavy, grey storm clouds loomed over the skyscrapers of Metropolis, but she hadn't been out for too long…_

_"Where are you?" She whispered quietly up at the starless night sky. The streets were silent and empty; she listened carefully as she closed her eyes for anything or **anyone** nearby._

_But there was nothing. Nothing but a rambunctious braking dog in the distance._

_Who was she kidding? Did she expect Superman to just hang around awaiting her call?_

_But where could he have gone? Surely he would come back soon; perhaps he was off in another country these past few days dealing with another emergency._

_Only she hadn't heard of anything involving Superman in days. And she was supposed to be Superman's personal press agent. But there was nothing._

_It was almost as if he'd vanished from the face of the earth._

_Her eyes scanned the skies hopefully, perhaps, if he could just catch a glimpse of him, just to know he was still here…_

_Minutes of searching and waiting, slowly began to evolve into hours. She didn't want to give up yet, though the time was nearing midnight she continued to briskly walk down the deserted city streets._

_"Lois." A whisper flowed through the air._

_What was that? She halted suddenly when the voice reached her ears, yet she saw no one._

_Was it him? Was he somewhere nearby?_

_"Lois Lane..." The voice spoke again, this time much more cold, a chill quickly ran down her spine as she slowly turned around, hoping to see hero at last._

_"Don't scare me like that, I thought that you--" She stopped dead in her tracks as she felt her heart skip a beat._

_It was **not** Superman._

_It was another man, someone she didn't recognize, though most of his distinct features were concealed by the darkness, he was very tall and blended in with her surroundings with his dark clothes._

_Before she could say anything, before she could run, before she could scream, the figure raised his massive fist and smacked the side of her head. A jolt of panic ran through her body as she fell downwards onto the cold wet concrete with a thud. Her thoughts were clouded and drowsy but she felt a pair of freezing cold hands and strong powerful arms lift her up and toss her over his large shoulder._

_"Sup…Super…" Her throat muttered out weakly. Everything was too fuzzy and confusing; her trauma to the head had left her completely defenseless. She was eventually lowered onto the damp pavement somewhere smaller and much narrower._

_Perhaps an ally, her brain tried to piece together. Natural instincts of panic began to take over as she squirmed and wiggled discovering that her hands were by now tightly bound._

_"…Super…man! Somebody, God, help!" She tried to scream out urgently._

_"Shut,** up**!"_

_The figured warned before giving another slug to the head. Terror swelled up inside her heart, she now could just barley struggle to consciousness. But then it came, she felt those two cold hands run themselves up and down her body; she knew the immediate danger she was in._

_"Superman!" She shouted louder this time as a last desperate plea before a final slam against her head silenced her cries._

_After that, she faded in and out of consciousness as the figure did as he pleased with her. She wasn't sure how long she helplessly laid there. Minutes, hours, it made no difference. She saw a bight flicker lightning strike at the corner of her eye as the thunder began to roar overhead, but it was the rain that saved her. The immediate downpour of rain eventually made the figure take his leave._

_"It's been a pleasure Sweetheart."_

_Perhaps the hardest yet, something metal clanged up against her forehead and face. She saw a last glimpse of the man running down the street, probably taking her for dead._

_When she finally realized articles of her clothes were missing, her heart sank._

_Her mind raced, you never expect it to happen to you. She recalled all those girls they did stories on, who were raped and beaten to death. But it hadn't happened often in such a long time—since Superman had arrived._

_It was at that moment, while she lay in a heap, a trickle of blood running down the side of her head, Lois realized that Superman was really gone._

_She couldn't tell the difference between tears and rain anymore. All she could focus on was one thought, one word, one person. She sucked in one enormous breath and used every last ounce of her energy to scream at the top her lungs, "SU-PER-MAN!"_

* * *

"Lois! Lois! Come on, wake up."

There they were again, those two violently shaking hands; "Get away! Don't touch me!" She couldn't stand the thought of those hands again.

"Lois it's okay!"

She immediately shot up out of the covers, breathing hard as a cold sweat ran down her face.

"It's just me, you're fine, and you're at home…" She was so thankful to find Clark hovering over her with an extremely alarmed and worried expression behind those thick black glasses. "You were just having a nightmare."

"Oh…thank God…" She said in a swirl of relief.

"Are you alright? You were…screaming…"

She sobbed quickly and dove close into his arms. "Yes, fine. Just a stupid nightmare…" Her heart raced. She was safe now, in Clark's arms and _his_ apartment.

"What…were you dreaming about?" He asked softy.

"Nothing…just--" She wanted nothing more than to spill out all her terrifying thoughts all over him.

"…Superman?" She looked up at him strangely. "You…were screaming his name…" He satisfied her curious look.

"Oh, sorry I woke you."

"No, no, you sounded very frightened Lois. What…happened?"

_Where did this dream come from? _These nightmares had stopped years ago. For months she had the same reoccurring, horrific dream forcing her to re-experience the worst night of her life over and over again. But it was so long ago now; she thought she'd gotten _over _it.

"I used to have these dreams a lot…right after, I was raped." She confessed slowly.

His soft puppy dog eyes clouded with empathy and compassion, but the last thing she wanted was for _another_ person so to feel sorry of her.

"I--I heard about that…"

"From who?" Fury and shame shuddered through her. Who had revealed her worst pain?

"Uh, Jimmy told me."

"Ugh…" She ducked her head down disgracefully.

"Did…did you ever find out who did it?"

She sighed. "Nope. Whoever it was got away for good. I can't even really remember what he looked like. You know, the worst part of it was that he knew me."

"What?"

She took in a trembling breath. "He knew my name. I don't know how, I thought he was just some random guy who thought he could have some with me. But now I think it's more than that, he knew me after all."

Clark didn't immediately respond, she saw his fists clench and his jaw tighten. He appeared, _angry_, to her. But that was ridiculous, Clark didn't get upset about anything.

"I'm so sorry Lois, I really should have been there for you." His voice was low and soothing, but she smiled, somewhat amused at his concern.

"Clark, you were a million miles away on the other side of the world. You wouldn't have had the slightest idea what was going on."

He didn't seem convinced. "I just can't believe it happened to _you_."

"Huh, that's what I said too. Nobody in Metropolis had ever expected for it to happen again with Sup--" It hurt. A small sting pierced through her heart as she thought about it now. He _didn't come._ "With Superman around." She muttered.

"…Do you have these dreams often now?"

"Not at all, this is the first one I've had in years." She sighed and leaned her head gently on his shoulder. "I guess since he came back, it just brought up old feelings and…_experiences_."

"Do you remember…anything about…what happened?"

"What do you mean?"

"I…mean, were conscious enough to remember…" He placed his hand on hers and stared her straight in the eye. "_Exactly _what he did to you?"

"Oh…" She shivered recalling her haunting past. "I don't know…sort of. I was in and out of consciousness. But I remember how cold everything was. It was in the summer but, he had those freezing cold hands…." She shook her head. "I don't want to talk anymore, sorry. But I just want to forget it."

"Right, I understand Lois. But if you need to, talk. I-I'll be here."

She gave him a very small smirk of appreciation. "Thank you." She turned to the little red digital numbers on her alarm. "It's almost 3:00am, we'd better try and get back to sleep."

"Maybe you should take a few more days off Lois. We just got back from Smallville a few hours ago, I think maybe you could use some more rest-"

"No, no, don't be silly. It was just a dream, and really want to get back to work."

He nodded slowly, as she forced herself to pull away from his warmth. "Alright, but are you _sure_ you'll be okay now?"

Though she felt guilty for these sudden thoughts, she wanted nothing more than to pull him close and tell him how nothing was okay. She didn't want him to leave her in the darkness all alone again. She didn't want to fall asleep, for fear of having to relive that frightening night. "I don't--"

She stopped herself from releasing the bottle of emotions she kept lightly locked up inside. "…I'll be fine by morning."

"Alright, remember I'm only a few steps away. Goodnight Lois."

"Night Clark."

* * *

"My God it's good to be back here," Lois announced to Clark as she stepped out of the elevator doors and into the hustle and bustle of the newsroom. "Sometimes it's like nothing can go wrong here."

"Uh Lois, you do remember that you were _shot _here."

"Oh, that was just a minor incident…"

"Minor? Lois you almost--"

"Congratulations CK!" Jimmy eagerly gave Clark a large slap across the back with a huge cheesy grin plastered on his face.

"I'm so happy for you Clark, honestly I didn't think you had the guts. How come you didn't let me in on it? But I can understand why you wanted to keep it secret. How long were you guys dating for?"

_Oh no. No, no. How…? Who else knew? Oh God…_

"Uh, Jimmy." Clark bravely stuttered out. "W-what are you t…talking about?"

"Ah, no need to keep from me anymore. The whole office is exited for you both. And I'm especially proud of your commitment Clark."

Lois very slowly turned to Clark and hesitantly said. "I don't understand Jimmy…what commitment?"

"Well, you two are engaged aren't you?"

A dreaded feeling of worry settled inside Lois stomach. Her eyes wandered around the room staring at each and every one of her colleagues. All of them had pathetic fixed grins of fake congratulations, a few others gossiped in the corner.

"Who told you that?" Lois asked very assertively as her temper began to boil.

"Perry did, anyway everyone's really eager to know when you guys plan to completely tie the knot."

Lois locked onto her target. _Perry. _She didn't even give Clark a second glance before she stomped across the room and stormed into Perry's office, slamming the door behind her…

* * *

"What the hell did you do!?"

Perhaps this wasn't the most appropriate manner to address her boss, but at this particular moment she couldn't have cared less about proper behaviour.

"What…?" Perry completely stopped dead cold at her explosion.

"What?! I want to know why the entire world suddenly wants to be Clark's best friend!" She pointed out the window where a small mob of people surrounded Clark, showering him with congrats and well wishes.

"Well I suppose they're happy for you both…" Perry replied completely oblivious to her outrage. "You are getting married after all."

"How in the world does everyone know that!?" Ideally, her little fib was supposed to be kept secret. She'd persuaded Clark to play along with their 'engagement.' It was never supposed to become common knowledge.

"_Just for my parents…we just have to keep it up for a little while. Until you're in the clear…"_

"_Uh…o-okay. Are you sure that, this is alright?"_

"_Yes, yes…it should work. I promise this won't get out."_

"I told Jimmy this morning. Then you know, word gets around-"

"How did _you_ know that?"

He sighed. "Well believe it or not, your mother called me this morning."

"M-my…mother?" Of course, her meddling Mother would have something to do with this.

"She asked me if I had seen any strange behavior between you and Richard. I told her you broke it off with him a few weeks ago, but we all figured it was because of Superman. I didn't even dream that it was really Clark you--."

"Clark and I are not-!" Every fiber of her being told her to fight back against this, she literally had to bit down on her tongue to prevent herself from exploding out the truth. This was _not_ supposed to happen, but if she blew it now, Clark could be sent back to jail…

"Not…sure we're quite ready for the entire world to know about…_us_. But I guess that's too late now."

"Look Lois, Richard is my nephew and I am disappointed you two couldn't work things out. But nonetheless I am happy for you and Clark."

"…Where is Richard?"

"I sent him to a journalism seminar last night in Atlanta."

"Oh." Good, at least she wouldn't have to worry about him for a few days.

Perry sighed regretfully. "Another thing Lois…I want you and Clark to take a few days off-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Stop right there Perry, I am not taking more time off. I need to be here, I need a story and I need--"

"Lois--"

"I'm fine!"

"You just broke up with Richard…"

"I'm fine!"

"You've got a bunch of new emotions to deal with, I don't want them interfering with your work-"

"They won't, I'm fine!" At this point she could tell Perry was just looking for an excuse to get her to rest.

"…Your sister just died."

And he found one.

"I'm fi--" Okay, maybe that was one thing she wasn't particularly fine with.

"Uh-huh. That's what I thought. You don't have to have it all together all the time Lois. Now, go save your new fiancé, Jimmy's already planning him a bachelor party."

* * *

"Ugh!" Lois threw down her briefcase as she slammed open the door in utter frustration. "I can't believe Perry did that to us!"

In all of Lois's outrage, Clark chose to be more optimistic. "What can a few more days hurt? At least we won't have to face the rest of the office right away…"

"I'm so sorry about all that. I really didn't mean for it to get out…my mother can just be so damn meddling!" She threw herself down on the couch to sulk. "And now you're mixed up in this, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have lied, or told my mother to keep her mouth shut, or-"

"Lois it's not your fault. If it weren't for you I'd still be in jail right now."

"Oh Clark, you know you have this really dorky way of cheering me up." She covered her mouth when realizing she'd just called him 'dorky' right to his face. "Umm, sorry, that was supposed to be a compliment…."

But he just laughed it off, a goofy grin on his face. "Are you hungry? I think I can whip us up a little something."

She tried to smile politely at him, but it came out more of a smirk. "I wouldn't expect Clark Kent to have any success with cooking…"

"Hey! Now _that's_ an insult!" He responded playfully. "I happen to have more talents than meets the eye." He strolled merrily into the kitchen and within a few minutes he was whistling a cheerful tune while cooking up an extraordinary meal that filled the air with a sweet aroma.

"Let me help-" She offered.

"No, no, you stay seated there. This is your holiday off and I'm not going to make you slave over a hot stove." He insisted she stay confined to utter boredom. Though she did find it terribly sweet of him, she eagerly chewed on her fingernails with an exited grin stuck to her face. She felt ridiculous, like a thirteen year old whose crush asked her to the dance. But she would admit it was a giddy, happy feeling, and she was content with it.

Fatigue from the lack of sleep finally started to take over, her eyelids slowly began to droop as she rest lazily up against the couch. The realm of dreams almost completely took over her mind before she felt a pair of strong, cold hands begin to massage her shoulders.

Her eyes fluttered open. Clark? Was it him? But these hands were _so_ cold… "Clark that feels very good, but you're awfully--"

She looked up over her shoulder at the hovering face the loomed downwards on her. It was _not_ Clark.

"Hello Sweetheart…"

"…Richard?"


	14. Green eyes

**It has been awhile. But I'm still alive, and so is my story!  
Feel free to throw rocks at me for leaving you with a cliff-hanger last time and taking so long to update. Don't worry, expect the next chapter in a day or two.  
Please review! The reviews are what makes the muse! Give all the hugs to _LostSchizophrenic_ for the beta!  
**

* * *

**Chapter 14:** **Green eyes**

Those two eyes. Those two beautiful, sea green eyes. Their enchanting emerald sparkle, _used_ to give her chills of excitement and wonder. She treasured the look of those gorgeous, and charming eyes. His impassioned, loving eyes, _used_ to be enough to take breath away.

Now, as she stared up at those eyes, she found them no longer to be bursting with love, compassion, and mystery. No, what she saw was a cold, lonely, lifeless gaze, staring straight back into her own. She longed to look up and find those past eyes, but they were gone now, probably never to return.

"What are you doing here?"

"I came to get you, Lois."

"How did you get it here?"

"The door was unlocked."

"It was not."

"Lois, we have to get out of here now, I'll take you-"

"You _broke in _here didn't you? You've been waiting here!"

Lois had a whirlwind cyclone of emotions, and questions swirling through her mind.

She started to lift herself off the couch, but Richard's hands threw down an enormous amount of pressure on her shoulders, gluing her to where she sat.

"Please Lois," he spoke calmly but with strict authority. "I need you to be quiet, and listen to me."

She glanced up, disgusted at him for treating her like a child, but she did as she was told.

"I can help you," he began. "I can help you and Jason out of this life. Luthor has very terrible plans for both of you. But if you are willing to cooperate, I can take you somewhere safe."

Lois raised her eyebrows at his proposal. "You can keep us safe?"

The idea sounded even more ridiculous when she repeated it.

"It's _your_ fault Jason and I are in constant danger, _you're _the one who betrayed us to Luthor. _You're _trying to sue me for his custody, _you_ kidnapped him, _you_ tried to kill Superman, _you_ murdered my sister, and you claim you want to keep us _safe_?"

After reading off the long list of Richards brutal acts of betrayal, he took in a deep breath and began to defend his outrageous actions.

"It was all for the best, I have been working for Luthor to find out what he's up to. I've been trying to get Jason away from you, and get him somewhere safe before Luthor could get to him. And for the record," his expression didn't change, but his eyes buzzed around like a bee with unease as he spoke. "I had _nothing _to do with the death of Lucy."

"You always were pathetic at lying to me Richard. You think I didn't know that you had planned a surprise birthday party for me last year?" she swallowed back the small sting of pain that she received from the fact that he'd wasted the happy memory by leaving them. "You were always so easy to read when you weren't telling the truth, like you are now. Don't feed me that crap about wanting to_ help _us." She replied without fear, but the grip around her shoulders started to tighten, sending a slight sense of dread through her heart.

"You didn't take Jason anywhere out of Metropolis, anywhere_ safe_, you drugged him to keep him quiet."

Richard shifted slightly, not removing his guilty gaze.

"Yes, that's right, Richard. Superman told me how you locked Jason up in his bedroom, and how you completely destroyed our living room trying to murder Superman."

Richard didn't say a word, the unsettling silence between them could have been sliced with a butchers knife.

It was then when she noticed Clark's cheery whistling, no longer filled the air. The kitchen was completely quiet. Her head snapped back up at him with alarm. "What did you _do_?"

She watched a sly smirk of satisfaction creep across his lips, as he read her panicked thoughts.

"Don't worry Lois, Clark's being taken care of."

"Uh…Rich?" as if on cue, two other men came out of the kitchen.

"There is nobody else here…" one reported, cautiously, seeming to be fearful of her ex-fiancé.

Confusion and disappointment taking over his voice, Richard replied, "Are you sure? Did you search everywhere?"

"Was it really necessary to bring your own team of henchmen just to pick _me_ up? Were you just planning to wait around here all day until we came home?"

Richard ignored her questions.

"Yeah," the other man responded. "There is no one else here, but her, should we wait for him to come back?"

Richard cast his eyes downwards at Lois before answering, "No, never mind him then. He won't be a problem now," he squeezed her shoulders tightly. "We have got what we came for."

Richard placed his icy hand on her arm and gestured for her to get up.

"I am _not_ going anywhere with you."

He knelt down beside her, "Lois, please for your own safety for Jason's safety… I can take you somewhere Luthor will never be able to hurt you."

If she hadn't known better, she would have bought into his offer, from deep sincerity radiating from his eyes. For only a brief moment, it was as if she'd gone back in time. As if she were looking at the old Richard again, the man that swept her off her feet when Superman wasn't there to.

She wanted the wall of betrayal he'd built between them to crumble, she felt a small feeling of temptation pull her closer to Richard, she wanted to believe him more than anything the world. However, she could never forget the burning expression of hatred in his face when he threw her to the floor in a fit of rage, the night she came back from the hospital after being shot. She would _never_ forgive him for that, she would look past his eyes and see the lies that lay hidden behind.

"I will not go with you." So she stood firm. "And neither will Jason."

"I am not leaving here without you, Luthor knows where you are-"

"Only because _you_ told him."

"Lois look," he said starting to rush, "I know you probably find it hard to believe now, but I still love you and Jason. I always have, that's why I'm doing this."

She shook her head doubtfully. "If you did, you never would have pretended he went missing and you certainly wouldn't have drugged him. And, regardless whether or not you were putting on an act to fool Luthor, if you loved me, you _never_ would have hurt me."

She couldn't put the pieces together. What did Richard really want with her? Was he going to take her to Luthor? What for? Where was Jason now? Had Richard already gotten to him?

"I'll _ask_ you one more time Lois, will you come with me?"

She clenched her fists together nervously when he put such emphasis on the word '_ask_', a small tremor of fear cracked her voice as she answered. "… No."

Richard lost all control over his patience. He grabbed her by the wrist and yanked her up off the couch into his arms. Lois felt her arms being twisted behind her back, Richards tight grip binding them together.

There it was, that horrible sensation of helplessness, the feeling she hated more then anything else in the world. Richard kicked her heels, signaling her to walk forward.

Where was Clark? Did he just disappear? She remained silent as they guided her down the nine flights of stairs.

Lois had no choice but to go along with her captors for now, however she was awfully curious to what Richards true intentions were. Richard inconspicuously led her out onto the streets of Metropolis and ducked her head into a black Corvette parked in front of the building.

She sat uncomfortably in between Richards two bulky muscle men as he began to drive down the streets. At once Lois began to recognize the familiar route she drove every day before heading to work. She bit her lip anxiously, not 10 minutes after the engine came to a halt as Richard removed the keys, Lois tilted her head towards the tainted black windows, and to her horror, they had stopped right outside Jasons school.

_So that's it!_ _They needed me to get Jason out of school without causing a scene._

A twist of panic tied a knot in her stomach. What did Luthor want with Jason?

_Finally! _

She breathed as a blur of blue and red flashed across the windshield.

She watched as Superman ripped off the car door as if it was paper, then grab Richard out of his seat. While the other two men sprang up out of the car, distracted by Superman's scene, Lois abandoned her captors and made a mad dash towards the school doors. She headed straight for Jason's classroom, stumbling over various toys, lunchboxes and sports gear in the hallway.

Jason, as well as the teacher immediately noticed Lois's dramatic arrival as she skidded to a halt at the doorway trying to catch her breath.

"Umm…Jason has…a…a…" she quickly attempted to fabricate a reason to excuse Jason from rest of the day.

_Three men, including his father are trying kidnap and give him to a bald, psycho man to perform sick experiments on. Oh, and by the way, Superman is outside kicking the crap out of them as we speak. _

Lois didn't think that would fly very well with the teacher.

"An appointment?" The young female teacher awkwardly finished for Lois, now that the entire class was either gawking at her messy, curly hair that hung down slobbishly in front of her face, or at Jason's confused and rather embarrassed expression.

"Yes!" Lois exclaimed. "Yes, a doctor's appointment. Last minute or I would've sent a note this morning," she waved forward in Jason's direction, he slowly got up from his seat and hung his head down shamefully, embarrassed that he needed his Mommy at school.

"Come on Jason, we don't want to be late…"Lois rushed as she picked him up into her tight grasp. The teacher called out after her as she took off down the halls once more.

"Don't forget to sign out at the office!

* * *

"Where are they?" 

Lois turned her head in every direction, scanning the playground for any sign of a struggle.

"Gone, for now." Superman assured.

"Mommy, is Superman taking us to the doctor's office? I don't want to go! I don't want to get another needle! Superman, I don't-!"

"No, don't worry sweetheart, we are not going to see the doctor today." Lois stroked Jason's hair, trying to calm him down so she could regain her bearings.

"Mommy, you told Miss. Howard a lie! Supermen, tell mommy that it is very bad to lie!"

"You are right, Jason," Lois gave Superman a disapproving 'where-do-_you_-get-off-telling-me-not-to-lie' glare.

"B-but," Superman accidentally stuttered, automatically shrinking back down into Clark mode under the pressure of Lois's anger. "Your mother was trying to protect you, so she had to… _trick _the teacher."

"Protect me?" Jason frowned, "Protect me from who?"

"From your fa-"

"Let's get out of here," Lois interrupted quickly, not yet wanting to reveal Richard's true intentions to Jason yet. "You look kind of awkward standing around in a primary school playground."

Superman nodded, taking the hint.

"Luthor knows where you are now. You can't go back to that apartment. Where would you like me to take you?"

Lois lowered Jason to the ground, he scurried over toward the swingset leaving the adults to their boring talk.

"I don't know… a hotel for now, I suppose. Then I'll have to start looking for _another _apartment."

"Lois…I've been thinking…" he began cautiously. "Maybe you should leave Metropolis-"

"You stop right there."

"Jason-"

"Will be fine. I'll have to send him to another school, but I am not going to run away and hide."

Superman should have known she was far too stubborn to even consider leaving.

"Neither of you are safe-"

"If I leave now, Richard will chase us for the rest of our lives. Face the fact, we will never be safe no matter where we go."

Superman didn't say anything, knowing what she said was true, he dropped the subject.

Lois, suddenly recalling Clark's quick disappearance back at the apartment, asked, "Where is Clark?"

"He is fine, I snuck him out of the kitchen window when I heard Richard coming up the stairs."

"What took you so long anyway?"

"I followed the car. I wanted to see where they were taking you. I thought they might lead me to Luthor but…"

"He wants Jason. I know that for sure now."

"….Why?"

" I don't know yet. It could one of a million sick, twisted reasons."

Lois shivered and huddled her arms together for warmth.

"I'll take you to a hotel now." Superman said gently, pulling her close.

"What about Clark? Can he stay with us too?"

She didn't like having to _ask_ permission, but she felt obligated to.

"I don't mind, if that's what you mean," he said gently, with complete sincerity.

She lowered her eyes away from his and called for Jason. She couldn't help but let a small smile form across her lips as she watched her son leap up into his father's arms with joy.

"Come on," Superman said softly, as he carefully wrapped his arm around her waist. "Let's go."

* * *

**So? What do you think? Please review!! I /promise/ new chapter up in a day or two.  
-ducks down out of the way for flying rocks- **


	15. Meet the parents…

**  
**

**Alright here is the update. No I have not forgot about this story, I'm actually four chapters ahead of you all.**

**This chapter was completed awhile ago, but was sent to beta. Unfortunately, for the past few weeks she has never responded, and this story has stood still for a pretty long time so I decided to post this chapter. However, this means this chapter has not been betaed. Sorry folks, but I needed to get a move on with it. So, until my beta contacts me again I am in need of a new temporary beta, would anyone like to volunteer? If your interested please just send me a quick e-mail (on my lookup) and I'll send you the next chapters ready.**

**On a lighter note….YAY!! Over 100 reviews at last! THANKYOU!!! -hugs for all-  
Next chapters up as soon as a new beta is found. Once again, sorry this chapter was not betaed and sorry for the spelling and grammar. PLEASE REVIEW!!  
**

* * *

**Chapter 15 Meet the parents… **

Everyone knew Clark had infamous habit of arriving at some of the most awkward of the times. This, was one of those times. Clark had heard Lois's hollering miles away from the _Galaxy Inn_, where the three of them had been staying for the past few nights as Lois searched the city for a new apartment.

Clark, or Superman, had insisted she look for one on the very outskirts of Metropolis, to make it more difficult for Richard to track her down.

Perry had informed Lois that Richard had quit his job at the _Planet _for a job in Atlanta.

Though, Lois had her suspicions that Richard probably hadn't even left Metropolis.

New Year's had came, and went. Now, as Clark turned the knob, leading him into the hotel room, he saw Lois sitting cross-legged in on the bed, cell phone stuck in her ear, facing away from the door, and shrieking into her phone.

"I'm very busy!"

"_You just told me that you had some time off work for awhile_."

"I have to register Jason at a new school, and I have to find a new apartment-"

"_Why did you even leave your old one_?"

"I told you… they had a horrible rat infestation."

"_Well, I'm sure you can make time in your busy schedule to introduce me to Carl._"

"**_Clark_**." Lois corrected.

"_Yes, your father is very anxious to meet him too. He is helping him get out of prison after all. The least you can do these introduced him to us_."

Lois paused for a moment, and sighed. "Fine."

"_Make sure you all have something proper to wear to the funur-_"

"I am not going to that funeral."

"_Lois, she's your sister…_"

"I won't go until I know exactly what happened to her."

Lois still had her suspicions about Richard, but didn't have a shred of evidence.

"_The police are on the case Lois_."

"All the police managed to do is put Clark in jail for Christmas, _I _will find out what happened to Lucy."

"_A funeral is for closure, Lois_-"

"And there will never be any closure for me until I know that her killer is rotting away behind bars."

"…_Do as you wish Lois. I'll see you tomorrow._"

The line went dead, Lois folded up her phone and tossed it across the bed, mumbling and cursing in frustration.

"L-Lois…"Clark hardly whispered.

Lois turned around, "Oh…hi Clark."

"I-is everything alright? I heard you down the hall…"

"Was I really that loud? Sorry,"

Clark examined Lois's hand, clutching her cigarettes and lighter behind her back.

"Listen Clark, I was just speaking to my mother," she shook her head. "My parents…want to meet you."

* * *

"Mommy!" Jason groaned trying to pull away from Lois's constant fussing, tucking in his shirt, combing his hair. 

"You are going to be very good for grandma and grandpa today, right?"

Jason nodded and rolled his eyes. He knew how to say please and thank you, and to never touch any of grandma's special glass figurines.

Jason scurried towards the front porch of the large white Victorian style house, as Lois turned her attention to Clark.

"Hang on," she quickly adjusted his tie.

"Oh…t-thank you…"

"Sorry, it's just that first impressions are very important to the General. If we're going to pull this off, we have got to make sure everything is just perfect."

Lois had always thought her parents were an annoying inconvenience, she would rarely ever bother with these ridiculous family gatherings, however if she wanted the General to help Clark stay away from prison, Lois would have to do whatever possible to make their engagement believable.

"Okay Clark," Lois said, giving him a few last minute pointers as they stood outside the door, joining Jason on the porch "Basically, all you have to do is pretend that you are completely head over heels in love with me. Do you think you can do that?"

"Y-yeah, no problem."

"Good, I'll handle explaining your alibi to the General. If you we're lucky, we'll be in and out of here in a few hours."

Lois gave Clark another quick scan as she bit her lip. "This doesn't look very convincing, we need to give off that '_one big happy family' _feeling."

Jason eagerly pressed the doorbell.

"Come here," Lois placed Jason in between them and scooted closer to Clark "Put your arm around my waist."

"Uh…uh…" Clark was very hesitant, but he did as instructed. Lois had growing doubts that their plan would work.

"Come on, Clark. We're supposed to be getting '_married_' after all! Think of them as your future in-laws."

"Oh…uh-ok…" Though that didn't seem to reassure him.

" Oh, and don't forget to kiss me once in a while."

"W-what!?"

"Lois!" The door swung open as an elderly woman stepped outside to greet them, arms wide open, folding them tightly around Lois. A wide grin spread over the deep lines on her face.

"Your father and I have missed you so much." The grin faded away as quickly as it had come, the old woman's voice filling her grief as she spoke. "We all need to be together at a time like this."

"Hi grandma!"

The women knelt down to Jason's level, "Hello Jason, why don't you run inside? There are some hot cookies waiting on the counter for you."

Jason gasped, and bolted inside the house.

Clark couldn't help but think of his mother, and how she'd missed out on all these moments.

"Well, come on in then you two." She gestured towards the door, finally giving Clark a brief glance of acknowledgement.

Lois's mother led them both into the house and motioned for them to take a seat on the rather large, and expensive looking couch. Clark gazed around the large room.

It had a similar feeling of his mother's house, although it was much fancier, and completely spotless.

Everything around them, on the walls, in the cabinets, all appeared classy and fragile, antiques from various places around the world.

"Is this really where you grew up?" Clark whispered.

"It's only one of many places."

Right. Lois didn't only have one childhood home her entire life like he did. She moved around from city to city, due to her father's military work.

"Hello Carl. It's very nice to finally meet you, I have heard-"

Good things, is what she was supposed to have said, but considering the fact that that the only thing she'd really ever head about him was that he was wanted for her daughters murder, '_good_' was obviously not the word she used.

"-I-interesting….things about you. Since you have asked Lois to marry after all."

Her mother didn't seem very keen on the idea for their '_engagement._'

_Maybe this isn't going to work after all…_

"Can you tell me a few things about yourself Carl?"

"It's _Clark_, mother." Lois corrected.

Clark felt kind of silly and pressured, like he was being interviewed for a job.

"Uh-uh well…"

Not the most promising start.

"I work with Lois at the _Planet_, I'm from Kansas-"

"A good old farm boy, eh? Lois, you've never brought one of those home before."

A rusty, large booming voiced echoed off the walls, as a man with a cigar in one hand and a drink in the other walked into the room.

Both Lois and Clark stood up, Lois giving him a small hug and Clark shaking his hand.

"I hear you have gotten yourself into a little trouble." Clark knew the General was referring to his few days spent in the slammer.

"I…um…well-"

"Oh, there is no need to go into _that_ right away." Lois's mother relived him.

"You two are engaged now, this is time for…" the woman's voice cracked slightly, tears swelling up in her eyes. Clark knew the pain her family must have been put through, with the loss of Lucy. "…celebration." She choked out.

"Clark had _nothing_ to do with Lucy, mother."

Lois took her mother by the arm and led her to the chair.

"But I _am_ going to find out who _did_."

Her mother nodded and took a handkerchief to dab her eyes. "Of course you will Lois."

"Tell me son," The General placed a hand on Clark's shoulder. "How did you get involved with my daughters," The General was clearly not a man who was supposed to show an emotional side very often, but his face seemed to soften as he said. "…murder."

"Clark was framed," Lois answered with complete certainty in her voice.

"A few weeks back, Clark and I were investigating an old warehouse where Lex Luther was suspected to be hiding. Clark and I were attacked by his men, but he…_saved _me."

Clark could tell Lois wasn't just using that for good impression, but was truly grateful.

"But, he misplaced his wallet. We believe whoever killed Lucy was connected to Luther," Lois neglected to mention her prime suspect, Richard. "And they might have found and used Clark's wallet to frame him. But Clark was with me, at the time of Lucy's death. So it was impossible for him to have anything to do with it."

"You…_saved_ Lois, Clark?"

Her mother said, finally bothering to say his name correctly.

"Well…uh s-sorta…"

"Yes he did." Lois smiled. "He was a real hero."

Okay, now he would admit Lois was just laying it on thick.

"Luther's men had tried to kidnap me, but Clark stopped the car and rescued me. He-"

Lois suddenly cut herself of, a growing sense of suspicion welling up in her eyes.

"How _did _you stop that car Clark?"

"Oh…oh I didn't really do much, it just slowed down on its own…m-must have been out of gas or something. All I did was take Lois home-"

"Would you look at that, he's modest too!" The General chuckled slightly, puffing his cigar he asked, "You smoke Clark?"

"No."

"Drink?"

"N-not really."

"Come on Clark, everybody has got at least one little secrete they aren't proud of. Do you cheat? Steal? Deal drugs?"

"No."

"Well, aren't you just the little prince charming! Nice catch, Lois."

Lois seemed to actually blush at the remark.

"…Clark, come sit with me for a few minutes," Lois's mother said, "I've got a few things I would like to show you…"

Mrs. Lane headed out of the room and into the hallway, she came back out again with a large stack of thick, decorated binders.

"This is a good sign," Lois whispered. "She only brings out the photo albums to the people she likes."

Clark spent at least a good hour sitting nest to her mother, laughing and joking at all of her stories and pictures.

But he didn't mind it at all; he hadn't seen all that many pictures from Lois's childhood. Truth be told, Lois had avoided the subject of childhood all together.

"And this picture is Lois's fifth birthday."

Clark grinned at the Polaroid, a little girl in a lacy, bright pink dress, cake smudged all over her face, smiled back up at him.

It was hard to believe Lois was ever a tiny, innocent, Barbie fanatic girl like that.

"Oh and here is her graduation photograph…oh, and this one…" Mrs. Lane trailed off,

handing him the second picture of two teenage girls in long fancy gowns, each clinging onto two teenage boys in suits giving them flowers.

"That was…Lois and Lucy's prom." Lois's mother blew her nose in her handkerchief. Clark realized how hard it must have been for her to look back at all these old memories of Lucy.

The women pulled her together quickly and sighed. "Wait here Clark, I have a picture that you may really like."

She excused herself from the room again, while Lois, who sat across the room feeling rather embarrassed from her mother's ridicules baby stories, began to flip through one of the binders.

Clark could tell she was recalling old memories of her sister when her face softened and she swallowed hard.

"Lois," Clark began slowly. "Maybe…you should to your sister's funeral tomorrow."

"No, I can't. Lucy won't be dead to me until I know what rally happened."

"What about your theory about-" Clark lowered his voice, "Richard?"

"If he rally did do it, then I want to know why and how Lucy got involved. She must have done something to upset Luther."

"Lois, don't you think your sister would want you there?"

"I can't-"

"You can promise her that we will get to the bottom of her murder."

Lois looked up at him when he said '_we.'_

"Besides," He went on. "Don't you think Jason deserves the chance to say goodbye to his aunt?"

Lois bit her nails, pondering over the idea.

"Maybe…for Jason."

Lois's mother came back into the living room with a framed photograph, this time when she handed it to him; Clark felt a little sting go through his heart.

It was a picture of Lois, standing beside a garden of bright beautiful flowers; sun beaming down on her face, Clark's mouth fell open at how beautiful she looked there.

But what made his heart clench, was that this picture was no taken as long ago as the others.

"Five years ago," Mrs. Lane informed. "When Lois was pregnant, as you can see."

It hurt so much to see right in front of him what he had missed.

"Oh mother! You showed him that picture? Look at my maternity clothes, and I must have gained a thousand pounds with that enormous belly."

She inspected it a moment and cleared her throat, "Richard…took that picture. She stared down at the rest of the pictures spread out over the coffee table.

"Maybe that's enough for now mother, I'm sure you've board Clark to death by now."

Lois said as she began to gather up the albums.

"I-I'll put on some coffee for you Clark."

Lois's mother quickly fallowed her into the kitchen.

It wasn't technically eavesdropping, Clark probably would have heard what they were saying without Super-hearing…

"Clark is a very nice man Lois, honestly, I really think he would be a very good father to Jason. But…_why_, Lois?"

"Why what?"

"Why did you break up with Rich-?"

"It just wasn't working mother."

"You have never given me a specific answer. Wasn't working, Lois? You were with the man for five years, he is the father of your son! Did you not even try to fix what whatever was going on? Perhaps marriage counselling?"

"There wasn't really anything to fix. We…just…fell out of love together."

"Lois, that is ridiculous, you don't just throw away a marriage-"

"We weren't married mother."

"-a five year relationship, with a child involved, without even _trying_ to fix it."

"…Then tell that to Richard."Lois muttered under her breath.

"Are you saying Richard was the one who broke it off?"

"Look mom, can we just drop it now?"

Lois said, perhaps a little too hotly.

"It doesn't matter what happened the point is…I…"

Lois swallowed, and he heard the pace of her heart quicken.

"I love _Clark _now." her mother didn't respond. They were both silent for a moment as her mother fiddled with the coffee pot.

"Clark said… he thought it might be a good idea to give Jason a chance to say goodbye to Lucy."

"So… you'll come to the funeral?" her mother asked hopefully.

"… For Jason."

* * *

Lois's mouth was dry, but her eyes were watery. She _promised _herself she wouldn't cry. She'd stay strong for Jason. 

They spent the night at her parent's house, so far their plan had been working perfectly.

The General had been on the phone all night, pulling all the right strings, calling in all the right favours, for Clark.

However, now she stood in the front of a crowd of people gathered around her sisters lowered coffin.

The entire family had shown for this dreary event. Lucy was well loved among the Lanes. Her mother was practically bawling, with the General perhaps close to a tear or two himself.

Jason squeezed her hand. It was his first real experience with death. He didn't quite understand it at first.

"So…Auntie Lucy is up in the sky now?"

Lois tried to give Jason a small explanation before the funeral.

"Yes, and she'll be watching over you."

"How long will she be up there? When will she come back down again?"

"She…she's not coming back down again, Jason."

"What?!" He began to panic. "Never? Can Superman get her down, he flies up in the clouds all the time. Can't he bring her back?"

Unfortunately, out of all Superman's great abilities, this was even beyond his reach.

"No... Sweetheart, he can't."

Jason's lip began to tremble. "Wha…What? So… we'll never ever see Aunt Lucy again?"

Lois didn't get a chance to respond before Jason ran out the door and sobbed.

It wasn't fair for Jason to go through so much pain at such a tender age.

"L-Lois…" a soft voice broke her out of her thoughts.

She didn't bother to turn around, she could feel Clark's warm presence behind her.

"Everyone is leaving now… did you want a few moments alone?"

She nodded, she was thankful Clark joined her family at the funeral, she needed him around at a time like this.

He scooped up Jason into his arms and paused, giving her a sympathetic look before he left her alone with the coffin.

She was shaking, not from the cold icy breeze that stung her nose, but from the mere shock that her sisters, rotting corpse was laying before her.

Lois watched the gentle snowflakes float down from the heavens above, where her sister was watching now.

She took in a sharp breath, she had no intention to speak to Lucy yet. Not until she found the truth. No, right now, she was going to speak with someone else.

"I know you can hear me." She began slowly, her voice barely above a whisper."I can't do this anymore. This isn't fair to Jason. I'm losing everything."

Her eyes stared down at the box six feet below. "... I'm losing every_one_ I care about."

She would never say it out loud, but she'd never been through so much emotional trauma, in her life since Superman came back. She couldn't help but blame him for some of her pain.

"I need some time to figure things out. Jason needs a break from it all."

She knew wherever he was, he would have a hard time swallowing the fact that she'd asked him to stay only for awhile.

"But…It's still nice to know, that you'll always…" her fists clenched, she was sick of hurting him like this. But she needed time to help Clark, time to investigate her sister's murder, time to forget Richard, and time to heal. "… That you'll always be around. And I'm glad you are."

Lois let out a long slow breath, she would have to leave it at that.

She turned back to her sister, and whispered,

"And I hope you always be around watching us too."

* * *

**Once again, pleaaasseee review!!**


	16. Investigate

** Please give your applause to...drum roll..._Ramenism!_**** My new amazing temporary beta! If she hadn't offered to temp for awhile, this story might have been abandoned :( but have no fear! _Ramenism_ saved the day!  
I'm really not sure when my other beta will joining the team again...anyway, please do enjoy chapter sixteen. Next one uploaded soon.  
Oh yeah...Please review! I really do love hearing your thoughts, they always seem to help me with the writing process. I love suggestions too.  
**

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**Chapter 16: Investigate**

"I found it," Jimmy waved Clark over to his desk, as he scrolled down the screen.

"The article made front page news," Jimmy informed him.

"What was so special about it?" Clark asked, a grim line crossing his face.

"It was the first crime to happen in Metropolis since Superman arrived."

The week after the funeral, Lois and Clark returned to their daily duties at the _Planet_, Lois didn't have much of a problem moving into her new apartment, with the help of Superman transporting all of her furniture.

Clark had now asked Jimmy to help him look through the _Planets_ database online in search of a specific article.

Clark glanced on the top of the page; it dated back to five years ago. He read the big bold headline aloud, "Young _Planet_ woman raped, where is Superman?"

Lois must not have been too pleased with that.

"Jimmy, who wrote this?"

"I did."

Clark raised an eyebrow.

"I know, it's not usually my type of story. But Miss Lane asked me to write it. She wanted someone she knew a little better to do it."

"I'm surprised the Chief made her publish it."

"So was I, but it was pretty big news for Metropolis since Superman wasn't around to save the day." Jimmy sighed, "How come you wanted to read it anyway Clark?"

"Oh, no particular reason…I-"

"I guess since you're her fiancé, you have the right to know."

"Uh…yeah."

"You'll probably get more information out of this article than you will from her. She never talks about it to anyone, she pretended it never happened. She saw a shrink for about a month after, but that was it."

Clark scanned the article quickly, "So it happened in Suicide slum, what made her go down there?"

"She told me in the interview, she thought Superman might be down there. After all, that's where most of the crime happens in Metropolis."

"Who found her?"

"Richard."

Clark froze. "What…? How did Richard know where to find her?"

"He didn't, he just happened to be passing by. Actually, that was how they met."

"So he just happened to be passing by at one o'clock in the morning?" Clark said, suspicions growing.

Jimmy shrugged. "He said he was looking for his lost dog, I think…"

Clark wasn't buying it. "Did the police ever arrest any suspects?"

"No, and apparently the description Lois gave the police never came up again. Whoever did it to her did it as a one time thing. The police suspected he went specifically after Lois."

"Do her parents know Richard was the one who found her?"

"Well…no. To keep this between you and me, her parents don't even know what happened."

"What?"

"Lois made Perry keep her name anonymous in the paper, nobody in her entire family knows."

"Why didn't she tell her family?"

Jimmy shrugged again, "Lois isn't the type of women who appreciates sympathy. It really wounded her pride. She already felt bad enough for the entire _Planet_ knowing what happened."

Even though Jimmy said Lois got over what happened, the last few nights she'd woken up screaming from the same terrifying nightmare haunting her dreams.

Lois didn't deserve to suffer like this, and Clark wasn't going to let her. The least he could do was try to track down the rapist and put him behind bars.

"Anyway Clark, I gotta be getting back to work. The Chief assigned me to get some _more_ pictures up Superman. The last ones… didn't turn out very well… but let me know if I can help you find anything else."

Jimmy grabbed his camera bag and head towards in the elevator, leaving Clark to his investigation.

"What do my parents want _now_?" Lois groaned to herself as she reluctantly flipped open her ringing phone, the caller ID reading 'General'

"Hello," she answered with a sigh. "Look, I'm sort of in the middle of something here…"

Lois stood outside the elementary school principal's office, it had been the first day of Jason's new school, and she already got a phone call complaining that he'd set and art easel on fire.

"Really Miss. Lane," the principal began to lecture. "I'm aware that you are currently a single parent and can't keep an eye on your son all the time, but I suggest that you keep your lighter far away from a five year olds reach."

Jason sat miserably in need corner of the office, glaring at the art teacher who yelled at him for bringing a lighter to school.

"This child is a pyromaniac! He didn't just set one art easel on fire; he lit all eight of them on fire at once!" That teacher fumed at Lois. "It was completely irresponsible of you as a parent to let him behave like this!"

Lois didn't hesitate to excuse herself out of the office when her phone rang.

She also made a mental note to speak with Jason's father; his abilities were starting to get out of hand.

"_I'm sorry to interrupt Lois_," the general spoke quickly. "_But it is important. It's about Clark_."

"…Make it quick."

"_I started digging up some background information on him_."

"…And?"

"_Well, you said he took a five-year trip around the world, correct_?"

"Yes."

"_According to my records, Clark Kent has never even been on an airplane befor_e."

"… What do you mean?"

"_There is absolutely no record of Clark, purchasing a plane ticket in his entire life. He doesn't even have a passport. He hasn't renewed his driver's license since he was eighteen years old._"

Lois was silent for a moment, speechless, taking time to register what her father was saying.

"_And according to this, Clark has never even left this country_."

Lois's mouth fell open.

"Miss Lane?" the principle called. Lois quickly put herself back together, as she stammered, "I-I'll have to call you back dad…"

Lois was absolutely steaming with fury as she marched into the _Planet_, fists clenched and a nasty scowl on her face.

"H-hey Lois," Clark approached her nervously. "I found-"

"Not _now_ Clark." She spat at him, making sure it was a harsh enough for him to stay away the rest of the day. He _lied_ to her. Straight to her face, straight to the entire office, even to Perry. She was not going to put up with another lie that spilled out of his mouth.

_Calm down Lane_, she took a few deep breaths. _Or he might get suspicious…_

In all of her anger, Lois forced herself to think clearly. Clark wasn't the type of person to do this. Whatever reason he had for bullshitting everyone, must be a damn good one.

Lois spend the next few hours at her desk, while her father faxed her every document he had found on Clark Kent.

_He's adopted? _Lois added another mystery to her collection. _I never knew that..._

Her stomach lurched, what else did she not know about Clark?

Lois quickly scribbled down a list of her unanswered suspicions about Clark, and tried to come to a reasonable conclusion to each one of them.

_Drivers license… well that's believable, I guess. If he moved to Metropolis, the most common way of transportation is either a cab or a bus._

She checked it off.

_Passport... plane ticket…_ it was painfully obvious that Clark never really did take his soul-searching trip.

_Maybe he is in some sort of trouble with the government and had to go into hiding for a while…_

Lois scanned one of the other documents, apparently this wasn't the first time Clark had been arrested; he was arrested when he was sixteen for arson…

The general also sent a few papers on the Kents.

_Martha Kent had a miscarriage when she was in a car accident, when Clark was about sixteen._

_Jonathan Kent died of a heart attack when Clark was about eighteen._

Clark's teenage years hadn't exactly been the most ordinary.

But the weirdest thing she found yet, was when Clark was eighteen, he was shot in the chest and was pronounced dead at the hospital. But his body disappeared, he was found a few hours later at home by his parents, and didn't even have a scratch.

That settled it, this wasn't normal. Clark had a secret, and she was going to figure out what it was. Lois spent the rest of the day investigating Clark Kent.

* * *

**Note: Some things near the end of this chapter refer to a few episodes of Smallville ( Martha's miscarriage, Clark's 'death' and such...) Sorry if I confused you there...Review please!! You know you wanna...**


	17. Fight

**:) I could not stop smiling when I received those wonderful reviews!:) Thank you so much to who did review, because each and every single one of them really makes my day! THANK YOU! _And _give enormous thanks to _Ramenism _for her hard work betaing my fic. THANK YOU! I really hope you'll enjoy this chapter, please -gets on knees and begs- pleeaaassee leave a review :)**

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**Chapter 17: Fight**

Lois spent the entire week digging up all the dirt on Clark Kent. Although she didn't find much more that particularly stood out. Except, maybe the fact that no matter where she looked, whom she called or what she found, she was unable to find Clark's real parents. Nothing, there was no record of him having any other name than _Kent. _There was absolutely no trace of them, not a blood type, not a country, not even a name.

_What if he's not from this country?_

It was always a possibility, and it certainly would explain a lot...

These and other unsettling worries kept Lois tossing and turning in her sleep. The idea of Clark having all these secrets was playing with her mind.

_I need a new resource, I need help. _She realized and began to consider her options.

The General was already doing as much as he could, Perry wouldn't be much help. He had too much faith in his employees, and would probably never believe Clark could keep a secret.

_I need someone I can trust, but it has to be someone who knows Clark well enough to want to help with my investigation..._

"Good morning Ms. Lane, I got some great new photos to go along with your article on Superman's team work with the community. I even got one of him, pulling a fireman out of a burning building. Want to see?"

Perfect, he was perfect.

"Show me the pictures later Jimmy, right now I want to talk to you about something else..."

* * *

"...Are you sure all of this is real, Lois?"

Jimmy was stunned, his mouth fell open at once when Lois finished showing him the thick brown folder of information she'd collected on Clark.

Jimmy was completely speechless for the first few seconds, trying to absorb everything she was throwing at him.

"I wish it weren't real Jimmy, but it is. I got most of it from my father."

"So... if Clark didn't take his trip for five years... where did he go?"

"That's the million dollar question. That's exactly what I need you to help me figure out."

"... I don't know how much help I can be Miss. Lane..."

"You're pretty close to Clark aren't you?"

"Well, I suppose, but so are you. You're getting married after all, why don't you just ask him?"

"Because I can't guarantee that he'll tell me the truth. If he's been lying all this time he's got no reason to start telling me the truth now."

"I don't know..."

"Look, I need your help. I can't figure out everything on my own. If I tried to get anything out of Clark he could get suspicious and will never know what's going on."

He still didn't look completely convinced.

"Jimmy, he could be in real trouble. He's hiding something big, big enough to make him disappear for five years. Are you going to help me help him, or not?"

He scratched his head and sighed,"... You're right. Okay Miss. Lane, you can count on me."

* * *

"Ready to go Lois?" Clark said, as he pushed his glasses further up onto the bridge of his nose.

"Yeah, I suppose we should go. Jason really hasn't been getting a lot of sleep lately."

Lois made sure she kept a casual and cool relationship with Clark, keeping him close enough to occasionally prod him for information.

"You've certainly been researching your stories thoroughly..." Clark observed, eyeing the large stack of papers stuffed in her brown bursting folder.

She grabbed her purse and Jason's backpack, fumbling with her folder.

"I can carry that for you if you want-"

"No, no I'm fine..." The last thing she wanted was for Clark to get his hands on that folder. "I just need Jason's jacket and then we can-"

To Lois's horror when she reached for Jason's coat, the papers she'd tucked safely under her arm spilled out all over the floor in front of Clark.

She mentally smacked, kicked and beat herself as she tossed everything else aside and scrambled to the floor to gather them up.

Clark bent down to help her, "What are you researching any way-?"

"Don't-!" She started to shout, but it was too late. Clark quickly skimmed a few lines and she watched his curious expression change to deep concern.

"What is this?" It was the darkest tone she'd ever heard him speak.

She looked down, fists clenched at her side as she and him both stood up. When she didn't answer, he repeated "What is _this_?" His voice growing even deeper and his gaze burning intensely at her guilty eyes.

Lois just stared at her feet, she'd been caught.

"Lois, what is this? Where did you get-?"

"You never took your trip." She finally blurted out. Swallowing hard she added, "You haven't even left this country."

It was strange feeling so fearful around Clark. She'd never seen him looking so serious before, and it frightened her. Flashing images of Richard crossed over her mind.

She got up the nerve to look straight up at him, and it was if she saw a quick sense of panic flash through his eyes as he scanned a few more documents.

"You're adopted, you've got no passport, and you don't have a license," Lois went on. "I-I couldn't even find your real birthday-"

"What do you mean _find_? Have you been _looking_ for information on me?"

"It didn't really start out that way," she began to defend herself. "My father had to look up all the information he could find on you. He gave most of what he found to me because what he found was rather...odd."

Clark didn't reply but he stiffened and his jaw tightened, he became tense and wouldn't remove his stare.

"... Are you in some kind of trouble? Is that why you had to disappear? Where did you go? Why did you come back now? What took you so long? Are you okay now?"

For a brief moment, he seemed to crack a very small smile. "You never stop asking questions do you Lois?"

"I just want to help you Clark. If you'll just explain everything-"

"I _can'_t."

"Why not?"

"... I just can't Lois"

"That's not an answer."

"Maybe not all of your questions can be answered."

"This one can, all you have to do is tell me where you went. That's all I really have to know-"

"I can't, even if I want to-"

"I'll eventually find out you know. It would make it a lot easier on both of us if you would just tell me now."

"It's too dangerous-"

"That's a really pathetic excuse Clark," she was starting to lose grip on her patience. "You can't be afraid of-"

"Not for me Lois, for you! If anyone ever found out that you knew... I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if they hurt you."

"Found out I knew what? Listen I can help you, my father can help you, I couldn't care less about the _danger_ I-"

"What about Jason? What if something happened to him?"

"Clark you couldn't seriously have a big enough secrete that any harm could come to me or Jason." _Could you?_

"Lois, you've got to trust me, for Jason's well being as much as your own."

"How am I supposed to trust you?!" She flared; they were lucky enough that newsroom was empty, because she no longer had any control over her temper.

"This is exactly why I can't trust Superman! This is the exact reason I'm not with _him_ right now, I can never trust him because he's got so many damn secrets!"

She paused for a few seconds to catch her breath, and then voice cracking she muttered out "I _knew _you, that's why I'm standing in front of you right now. Because I could trust you, there were no secrets between you and I. God, you even knew about Jason's real paternity-" she suddenly stopped herself dead, a burning suspicion growing in her eyes.

"You... you never did tell me how you found out who Jason's true father is..."

"...Lois, I can't answer your questions. I _can't_. For Jason and for you I can't and I won't. A-and if you can't accept that then... I am sorry."

"That's not good enough for me Clark, if you think I'm just going to drop this-!"

"Mommy...?" Both glances turned their attention to Jason, who wandered out from Perry's office where he had been entertained by a computer game the last few hours.

"Why are you yelling at Mr. Clark?...Are you guys fighting?"

Lois took in a deep breath forcing to cool down, "N-no, Jason we are not fighting, I'm just..."

"Scolding him? Does he have to be grounded now? What did he do wrong?"

"He told Mommy a lie. So now as his punishment," She glared back at him. "Clark gets to take a taxi home all by himself tonight."

Lois gathered up the rest of her papers and took Jason by the hand leading him towards the elevator. But before taking her leave she turned around, staring Clark straight in the eye past his fake lenses and said,

"Make no mistake Clark, I _will_ find out what you're hiding."

* * *

Clark threw himself down on the couch and sighed, it had been a long night. Three fires, two burglaries, four muggings and even an attempted suicide. His nights were never boring, and he even managed to accomplish all of this with the horrible guilty sensation in his stomach that still refused to go away since his feud with Lois.

He didn't have the courage to go back to the apartment with her, so flew directly back to Smallville.

His eyelid's flipped open towards the window to see rising Sun over the snowy fields. Even the beautiful sight couldn't lift his dreary spirits.

"She's going to figure it out soon enough Ma..."

"Of course she's going to figure it out; you've always known that she would. What I think you need to do is tell her before she does."

"... Why? She'll be really upset-"

"Of course she'll be upset, but she'll be a lot less angry if you tell her directly instead of discovering the truth on her own."

"I can't just tell her, there are complications..."

"What's complicated? You love her and she loves you, it's really rather simple."

"There is Richard and Luther to think about, if they ever found out Lois knew who I was... I couldn't imagine what they'd do to her. It's bad enough already that Jason knows."

"But you'll always be there to protect her. Besides, she's a brave woman and knows how to handle herself."

"I just don't want to risk it."

"...Clark, do you like it being this way?"

"What do you mean?"

"Do you like lying to her face and keeping secrets all the time? Do you like not having a relationship with your own son? Do you like being alone?"

"That's just the way things are. I don't _like_ it..."

"Then all you have to do is tell her, I promise you Clark it'll be okay if you just tell her the truth. You can have everything you've ever wanted, all you have to do is tell her."

Clark found himself actually considering his mother's idea. "It's the only way to get Richard to drop the lawsuit against Lois. If you don't do something Richard _will_ get custody of Jason. Take a paternity test under the name of Clark Kent. You can tell Richard that he's _your_ son, and not Superman's. Then all you have to do is to tell Lois."

"You make it all sound so easy..." he shifted uncomfortably. "I'll have to think about it."

"Well don't spend too much time thinking about it, because if Lois finds out first, she won't even give you the time of day to explain yourself..."

* * *

"You _fought_?"

"I just cannot believe him!"

"... What do you mean _fought_?"

"You know he didn't even have the decency to come back to the apartment last night!" Lois paced back and forth beside Jimmy's desk venting on about last night's little episode.

"Since when does Clark _fight_?"

"He's got to have some nerve to stand there and lie straight to my face!"

"... So he actually fought _back_?"

"Jimmy! Yes, okay? He refused to tell me the truth, and then he got all sappy on me by claiming that it's for my protection!"

"Wow," was all Jimmy could say, still in denial that Clark could ever be involved with something so secretive.

"And the worst part about all of this is that we still have no leads whatsoever."

"Uh...well, I found something yesterday that seemed little odd." Jimmy handed her a thick stack of a vibrant colored postcards from various countries around the world. "You said these are from Clark, right?"

"Yeah, he sent them to me during his travels-- well, he said he did anyway."

"Well, this isn't Clark's hand writing." Jimmy handed her a card that was supposedly from Germany.

She inspected it quickly, it looked familiar enough. "Sure it is...?"

"No, it's close though. Look at his signature, Clark doesn't make his _'C'_s' like that. They tend to be a lot curvier, and seeing how the "_N_" and the "_T_" are connected? Clark never does that, he said he always had trouble with the '_T_' connecting with me '_N_', it always looks all jumbled."

"Jimmy," she gave him a rather curious look. "How are you so sure?"

"I have the sort of her weird knack for penmanship; I can recognize almost everyone at the _Planet_'_s_ handwriting. It's a pretty odd talent I know, but it's very useful. How do you think I knew you were the one who wrote that fax when you were aboard the _Gertrude_?"

She was impressed, "I see your point, but what does that mean? Someone else wrote these postcards? Someone else knows where he went? Someone helped him cover up his disappearance?"

"It looks like it. I have no idea who it could be the though..."

"... Perry is always a possibility." She began to brainstorm. "It would make sense; he gave Clark back his job awfully quickly when he got back."

"It could be that chief, but if Clark was in some sort of trouble with the government I don't think Perry wouldn't want anything to do with it. It would be bad for the paper if he got caught."

"Well...Clark isn't the most popular guy around, who else does he really have?"

"His mother."

"Mrs. Kent? No way." Lois dismissed the idea that lonely old widow like Mrs. Kent would have anything to do with something like this.

"I don't know Lois, think about it. She would be perfect... a mother would do anything to protect her son. Gosh knows, you should know that."

She shook her head. "I still don't think she had anything to do with it."

"If Clark was going to vanish off the face of the earth for five years he'd have to tell his mother _something_. And I doubt she would believe he was taking a soul-searching trip, like the rest of us did. Besides, you said she'd had some pretty questionable experiences herself."

"Then what exactly are you suggesting Jimmy?"

"I think… we should take a trip to Smallville..."

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**I hoped you liked it! Please leave a review on your thoughts! Next chapter should be up...soon-ish.  
**


	18. Curiosity killed the cat

**Hugs for _Ramenism! _(AKA:The Queen of Ramen :) ) Even when she was sick, she was still able to come through with the beated chapter. I can't thank her enough! Also thank her for the title name of this chapter when I couldn't think of anything.**

**Enjoy.  
**

* * *

**Chapter 18: Curiosity killed the cat**

Lois and Jimmy developed a plan.

"I have an aunt and uncle that live in Smallville. They're going to Hawaii this week, so we can stay at their place for a day or two."

"What's wrong with a hotel and cab?"

"It's Smallville Lois. I'm not even sure if there is even a motel. And as for a cab, you'll be lucky if there is a horse and carriage."

They both purchased plane tickets for the next flight out to Kansas.

"I don't wanna stay here mommy, I want to come with you!" Lois decided it would be best to leave Jason behind. She wasn't exactly sure how this confrontation with Martha Kent was going to go.

"You'll have fun with Uncle Perry. I won't be gone long."

"Why can't I stay with Mr. Clark?"

"... He's pretty busy, honey..."Clark was the last person on her list that she could trust right now.

"You promise you'll be back soon?"

"I promise."

"We need an excuse for Perry." Jimmy realized.

"... I'll just tell him I'm working on a story. Don't worry about him; I'll get him something on Superman when I come back. That will keep him satisfied."

Everything went exactly according to plan. Lois had barely even looked at Clark let alone give him any reason to suspect what they were up too. Everything was working out perfectly; perhaps they might get down to the bottom of this mystery after all.

* * *

"I am completely lost Jimmy."

"You were supposed to turn left on Miller Street."

"I can't find it; it's not on the map anywhere." Lois hopelessly spun her map around in every direction trying to figure out where she was.

It seemed like she'd been driving past the same pastures and snowy fields of Smallville for hours. And she was in a less than comfortable setting, the heat didn't work, the brakes were worn out, the unpleasant scent of manure filled her nostrils…and Jimmy said his uncle's truck was perfect...

"... It looks like it'll hardly start…"

"It's an old trunk yeah, but it'll do. Besides, you're only going to Mrs. Kent's and back."

Lois decided it would be a much better idea if she confronted Mrs. Kent alone at first, and later bring Jimmy in as reinforcements if she needed to.

So, as she sped along the icy streets of Smallville, Jimmy jabbered away in her ear on her phone trying to give her better directions from his laptop.

"Are you anywhere near a street called Sheffield?"

"I've got no idea where I am Jimmy."

"I thought you said you've been to Mrs. Kent's farm before?"

"I have, but I was more or less...distraught at the time."

"You might as well come back then, if you can't find it-"

"No, I'll keep driving a while longer." She turned left onto the next road and pulled over to take a better look at her map.

"Okay you should be right near what looks like a lake."

She strained to see outside window, but the snow blizzard outside was so thick she would never be able to tell the difference between the ice and ground.

"If it's there it's completely frozen over. I can't really tell... I don't think it's a lake. There is a big barn and farmhouse in the distance."

"Then you must be going the wrong way-" Jimmy's voice by static when the signal was lost on her phone.

_Damn storm._

She could hear the wind howling outside as the snow blew across the windshield.

_Alright,_ she gave in. _I'll just go back..._

She put her key into the ignition of the truck, but it only made a small rumbling noise before it died down again.

_No...no no no no!_

She whined grimly to herself, she tried to turn it again but this time was no better.

_Great, no phone, and no truck._

She shivered and hugged herself for warmth as her breath began to fog the windshield. So what could she do now?

_It's really only about a 10 minute walk..._

She considered, looking longingly at the warm little farmhouse across the pasture. Though the snow was blinding, the chilling icy breeze was beginning to leak in through the truck, she'd probably freeze to death if she waited out the storm...

She grabbed her purse, zipped up her coat and opened the truck door. The bitter cold made her teeth chatter as she began to trudge through the knee deep snow. The wind was sharp and stung her eyes, but she kept clear sight of that distant farmhouse. It matter of minutes, her fingers and toes were already starting to go numb.

She ventured only about halfway across the field before she heard an awful sound through the howling wind that made her heart skip a beat.

_Crack!_

Lois froze in her footsteps. This wasn't a field; she'd been going in the right direction after all. She was standing on a lake...

Even though she was completely motionless the ice continued to crack and break apart below her feet. She felt a small chunk shift underneath her foot.

She started to break into a run, but wasn't quick enough. The ice seemed to swallow her whole as she stepped over a particularly weak patch and plunged into the frigid water.

When she fought her way back up to the surface, she reached up to the side of the ice and grabbed a hold of the ledge, coughing and gasping.

She stretched her arms upwards and tried to pull herself up over the ledge but kept slipping back down into the icy pool. The ice was too thin, and broke when she put too much pressure on the edge.

"H-h-hello!" She shouted shivering, "A-anybody!" Maybe if she was loud enough the people in the farmhouse would notice her…

But they didn't, and she was beginning to lose almost all track of time. She was shivering uncontrollably and growing drowsy, her eyelids drooping shut.

_If I fall asleep I'll drown... _and it occurred to her that she'd probably already gotten hypothermia, almost everything below her shoulders was numb and her vision was getting blurry.

"S-somebody!" She called out weakly. The wind drowned out her voice, there wasn't a chance anyone would hear her. She found every breath she took in was getting harder and harder. She would take anything she could get at this point. Even if _he _were to hear her, she wouldn't complain. Just then, a frightening thought pierced through her heart. At Lucy's funeral she asked him _not _to listen in for a while.

_Oh, no…he won't hear me..._

* * *

Clark stared across the room at Lois's empty desk. Her unusual absents was distracting. He decided to give her the privacy she deserved and chose not to listen in.

"Hiya Mr. Clark!" Jason bounced across the room towards his desk, looking very pleased with himself. "Look what I've got," he opened his palm to reveal a handful of candy. "Uncle Perry said that if I go spend lots of time with you he'll give me even more!"

Perry gave Clark a thumbs-up signal from his office as a sign to keep chatty Jason preoccupied for awhile.

"What are you doing here Jason? I mean... where's your mother?"

He shrugged. "She said she had to go away for a while to investigate something."

"So you're staying with your Uncle?"

Jason nodded "Don't worry, Mr. Clark, mommy isn't mad at you anymore."

"She's not?"

"Yeah, she wants to help you so you don't have to go away."

"I'm not going anywhere."

"Mommy told me you went away for a long time before I was born. Did you..." he cupped his hand over his mouth and whispered, "... _fly _somewhere?"

"Well... I-"

"Kent!" Perry barked. "I'm assigning you the story on Superman's work with the community."

"B-but chief, I thought Lois was working on that article."

"She was, but she's got the weekend off. I want that story on my desk by tomorrow morning-"

"Uh, chief-where did she go?"

Perry made a face, "... She didn't tell her fiancé where she was going?"

Clark only shook his head.

"She and Olsen left for Smallville this morning."

"Mr. Clark..." Jason tugged on Clark's sleeve. "Splashing, I hear a lot of splashing... and coughing."

Clark knelt down to Jason's level, "Splashing?"

Jason groaned "Oh, no it's happening again..."

"What's happening?"

"You know how sometimes I can see through things? Sometimes I can hear strange things too... things that are outside…really far away."

Clark smiled proudly, "Don't worry. It's not a bad thing. I can hear strange things that are far away too."

"Really? Mr. Clark, how come I'm so much like you-?" Jason cut himself off squinting, concentrating on whatever he was hearing. "Wind…I hear the wind! And coughing..."

Clark found it strange how well Jason was able to distinguish each sound. When he first received his Super hearing, all he heard was a bunch of noise jumbled together. Jason on the other hand was able to pick out specific sounds and drown the others out.

"She's shouting, calling for help...Mr. Clark, you gotta be Superman..."Jason lowered his voice." You have to go save the lady."

"What lady?"

"The splashing lady in water! She needs your help-" Jason's eyes suddenly went wide and he gasped. "Mr. Clark its mommy! The lady is mommy! She just said your name!"

Clark's stomach lurched; forget about privacy when it came to her safety. He listened carefully for a moment trying to concentrate on Lois's voice, her heartbeat, her breathing, anything...

Finally, when he did pick up her sound, it was enough to make his heart skyrocket. Lois was drowning.

* * *

Not for a second did Clark take his full concentration off the slow beating heart that echoed through his mind.

_Please, _he prayed silently to himself as he whizzed out of the city, _please just let me get to her in time... _in a matter of seconds the skyscrapers of Metropolis became the wide open pastures of Smallville.

He couldn't pick up an exact location of where she was at first, but followed her raspy breathing and coughing until he spied what looked like a small pool is the middle of a field from his eagle eye point of view. As he got closer he realized it wasn't a field. It was a lake, and he could hear Lois's desperate struggle to reach the surface coming right from underneath the ice. She had been completely swallowed underwater by the time he dove down smashing through the surface of the ice. He frantically searched the murky lake waters, and saw her pale, limp, unconscious body drifting further and further downwards.

In one speedy gesture he scooped her up in his arms and burst to the surface. Her face was as white as a ghost and her lips were an icy blue color.

He placed her across his lap and began to perform C.P.R, she needed air, _now_. Clark tipped her head back pressing and sealing his lips together with hers. He gave her two long, slow breaths of air, hoping to clear out the water that filled her lungs.

When she didn't respond, he gave her two more. "Lois!" He cried, "Wake up!"

But then he didn't hear it, it stopped; the pounding in his ears was no longer beating. Lois's heart had _stopped._

"No!" He began to panic, "Lois, please!"

He placed his hands on top of her chest and pressed down several times, hoping to restart her heartbeat. But his efforts were wasted, nothing happened, she just laid there.

"Lois, wake up!" he locked lips with her again and gave her another huge breath of air, but she still lay motionless.

"Y-you can't leave Jason!" Clark stammered, voice beginning to crack. He pressed down a few more times on her chest, harder and harder each time.

"Wha...what is this!? Some kind of pay back!? I left you, so now you're going to leave me, right?! Well that's very funny Lois, but you _can't _leave me!" He shouted, but he knew he was kidding himself. He would do anything for her to wake up and say "_Hah! Now we're even!" _

"Wake _up _Lois!" He could feel hot tears welling up in his eyes as he pressed her cold forehead against his lips. He cradled her head in his arms, kissing her lightly on her stone cold cheeks.

"Don't you _dare _leave me..."

As a final attempt to restart her heart, he clenched his fist and pounded down on her chest...

At once Lois shot upward meeting his teary gaze, coughing and gagging out streams of water, and Clark heard her weak heartbeat fill his ears once more.

"Lois...thank you..." He wrapped his arms and cape around her shivering body and hugged her tightly against his chest. He was overwhelmed with gratitude and relief; he could feel his own heart in his throat. He almost _lost _her, she almost left him _forever._

Her lip trembled, staring up at his bright blue eyes still swimming with terror.

"Don't you _ever _scare me like again..."

And to his amazement, she cracked a very small grin and barely whispered, "I wouldn't dream of it..."

* * *

"That was downright stupid, Lois!"

"I know..."

"You could have drowned! Or froze to death!"

"I know..."

"Superman would have had my head on a platter if he knew I sent you out there!"

"I know..."

"Why didn't you wait for me? Why didn't you wait out the storm? Why didn't you-"

"I get the point, Jimmy!"

Jimmy paced back and forth along the Lois's hospital bed lecturing her about how foolish her decision to walk across a half frozen lake was. "What would you have done if he hadn't heard you?"

"Well, I wouldn't have to worry about that, I'd be dead! Look...I know it was stupid, and I'm sorry, but I'm fine now."

"Oh yes, your '_fine',_ you know when Superman brought you in here yesterday the doctors diagnosed you with severe hypothermia."

"...Jimmy, are you here to lecture me like I'm five years old again, or tell me what you found out in Smallville?"

Jimmy sighed and gave in, "I went to Mrs. Kent's farmhouse, but..." He paused, as if debating whether or not to give her the news of his discoveries.

"And?" She prompted him on.

"But... she... "A strange look passed over Jimmy's face, while staring her straight in the eyes; he said "She wasn't home..."

"Ugh, great. Well, now we've got nothing to go on."

"Lois... maybe we should just drop this…"

"What?"

"I mean, we really should just leave Clark and his secrets alone."

"What the heck is the matter with you? A few days ago you were analyzing his handwriting for crying out loud! Now you want to just forget about it? What do you think-" She stopped, with a sudden suspicion crossing through her mind as she asked, "Jimmy...are you _sure_ Mrs. Kent wasn't home?"

"Yes...I'm positive..."

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**-Grins- I bet you guys weren't expecting all that. Next chapter up soon...Please review! I would particularly like to hear your thoughts on this chapter. (Well, I love your thoughts on /every/ chapter) Too much cheesiness? What do you think Jimmy seems to be hiding? Any specific line you liked? A part you think could have been improved? I Love all of your thoughts!**


	19. Ten seconds

**Thanks for the beta** **_Ramenism_! And this time also thank _Riffti_, meh old school friend for another beta, for apparently wanting to join the beta team it for some odd reason...**

**-Hugs to you both!-****  
**

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**Chapter 19: Ten seconds  
**

"Mommy! Mommy! Look what I got at school!" Jason bounded across the playground and proudly held up a brightly red and pink colored piece of paper.

"What's that you've got there?"

"A Valentine! A special one too!"

"Oh, yeah? Who is it from?"

"A girl."

Lois's mouth formed a huge grin, "What's her name?"

"Veronica."

_Aww..._ she couldn't help thinking how adorable he was. She'd made sure that the doctors let her out of the hospital just in time for Valentines Day.

"And look, she gave me a chocolate heart too!" Jason eagerly popped the candy in his mouth and grinned.

Lois zipped up his jacket and took his hand down the street.

"... Aren't we taking a taxi?"

"I thought we'd take a little walk today." Jason's new school location proved to be very convenient being so close to the _Planet._

"... I didn't get any other Valentines though..."

Lois did notice how all the other children clutched a tiny paper bag practically bursting with Valentine cards and candy. Jason hadn't really been the most popular kid in school since his incident with the canvases.

"Have you made any other friends yet?"

Jason shook his head sadly, "No. Only Veronica will play with me. But she's a girl and likes Barbie dolls. I wanted to play soccer in the gym today, but nobody would let me..."

"You're still new at school, people will come around eventually and then you'll make lots of friends." But deep down, Lois wasn't sure if Jason would ever really be able to fit in.

They continued their walk, Jason stomping in the puddles of slush and snow, while Lois dug around in the bottom of her purse for her ringing cell phone and flipped open quickly, "Hello?... yes Perry. I've got the Superman story coming; I'll have it on your desk tomorrow morning. Don't worry about it...yes I know it's your job to worry about it...yes I know the deadline was yesterday..."

10 seconds. She only turned her back for 10 seconds. 10 seconds she wished she could take back, 10 seconds was all it took for Jason's Valentine card to blow out of his head and be

carried by the wind right across the busy street...and Superman's arrival was 10 seconds too late...

"Jason!" She was completely petrified when she turned around again; she was in such deep shock she couldn't even move. She could only stand there helplessly as she watched Jason for 10 seconds as he darted across the traffic of Metropolis chasing after his fluttering Valentine. But he didn't make it to the other side.

Lois even heard the impact on her son's body with the taxi that must have been driving twice speed limit, and saw it collide right into Jason's path. She watched half his body be crushed underneath the tires of the cab before it barely screeched to a stop.

After 10 seconds of her paralysis and shock, he came.

The cab driver dove out of the vehicle as Superman lifted up the car tossing it aside onto a cleared sidewalk, revealing a tiny little motionless body underneath.

Finally, when the feeling in her legs came back, Lois sprinted over to Jason's aid, as a crowd began to gather around to watch what was happening.

Superman took Jason's fragile, unconscious body into his arms and inspected him carefully. His face turned from absolute panic, to what looked like relief.

"He...he's fine..." he said softly. Lois, who was weeping uncontrollably at her son's pale face cried, "What do you mean _fine_?! Can't you see he-!"

"Hey, look!" One of the people from the crowd yelled out, pointing directly at Jason's face. Lois looked up at her son and surely enough, his eyes were fluttering open.

"Mommy...? What happened?" He sat up straight on Superman's lap, "Did you save me, Superman?"

Superman mouthed very quietly, making sure no one else would hear. "No...I didn't..."

As Lois's vision became clearer from her blurry tears, her mouth fell open when she saw that Jason really was _fine_. Not a drop of blood, not even a scratch...

She opened her arms wide enough to scoop Jason hastily out of Superman's arms and into her own flooding him with hugs and kisses.

"Jason!" She sobbed his name over and over again hugging him tightly. When she gave Superman a quick glance she could see that he longed to join them and embrace his son with relief. But the crowd kept him at his distance.

"I-I still think we should take him to the hospital."

Superman only nodded briefly before lifting Jason up into the sky.

* * *

"Say ahhh..."

"Ahhhhh..."

"Ms. Lane, this is the strangest thing I've ever seen in my entire career." The doctor reported to Lois, he must have only spent five minutes analyzing Jason before giving her the good news. "There is absolutely nothing wrong with your son. You say he was hit full throttle by a speeding car?"

She nodded.

"The only possible way I could explain this is that if Superman was only _just _able to quickly step in the way in time, and the impact on the car hit him instead of Jason."

She could only agree, but she knew it wasn't true. Superman said it himself, he didn't save Jason.

"I can keep him overnight for observation, if you want to be sure..."

"No...no, that's all right..." She just wanted to get her son safely home.

"Lois..." she turned around to see Clark standing in the doorway of the office.

"... what are _you_ doing here?" She said harshly.

"I-I heard about Jason, I just wanted to see if he was okay..."

"Heya Mr.Clark!" Jason shouted, a red sucker stuck in his mouth from the doctor.

"Golly...he seems...fine."

"You didn't have to-" Lois began, before her cell phone tone interrupted her again. When she glanced at the caller I.D it read, "Richard."

"...I'll be right back." She excused herself into the hallway. "What do you want?" She didn't feel like playing mind games with Richard right now, so tried to get straight to whatever he could possibly want with her now.

"...Since when do you answer your phone like that? So rude Lois..."

"What do you want, Richard?"

"I've finally hired a lawyer Lois; you'll get a phone call next week about the trial date."

"What are you-"

"For Jason. I've mailed you a set of papers in case you decide to make this easier on all of us. All you have to do is sign."

All of the chatter from the patients in the waiting room seemed drown out of the background, a dreading silence hung between them.

"That's right Lois, _mailed._ Don't think I don't know where you are. But I really don't have any interest in causing a scene. All I want is my son."

"He is _not_ your-" She bit down on her tongue. She wouldn't be intimidated by him, and stood her solid ground. "I won't sign, and you won't win Jason."

"Of course I will, I've got the house, the car, I've got access to the savings accounts for Jason's schooling, oh...and I'm sure the judge will take into account that _you're_ the one who cheated on me. Face it, Lois. I've got the upper hand."

_Bastard._

"Just sign the papers and we can-"

"No!"

"...Then I'll see you in court."

The line went dead.

Clark, who was listening in from the office, had his fists clenching and teeth grinding together. He was absolutely _furious _at Richard, but he had to admit it, Richard _did_ have the upper hand, and unless he did something soon Jason would definitely go to Richard.

"Excuse me, Doctor Fallon, is it? Do you know where Lois and I could take Jason to have a paternity test done?"

"Well we can do it right here in this hospital now. It's a very simple test, all you have to do is sign here, and we can get started. You'll get the results back in a few weeks."

The doctor handed Clark a sheet of paper regarding his various health records and allergies which he quickly filled out.

"Oh, and we'll need the mother's signature too."

This was the part he dreaded most. He would have to confront Lois about this plan, and tell her the truth...

Or would he?

Clark opened the door out of the office and saw Lois sitting in the waiting room, mumbling and cursing, trying to cool down her anger at Richard.

_She doesn't even have to know...I can still do this and I won't even have to tell her..._Temptation whispered in his ear, as Clark scribbled down Lois's forged signature.

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**:) Please leave a review if you enjoyed! -Hugs betas again- I couldn't have done it without ya!  
**


	20. Junk mail

**Hey again.**

**I realize it's been awhile. I'm three chapters ahead, you have a lot to look forward to. Thanks for the awesome reviews! They helped get my muse back on track from vacation. I'm loving the helpful feedback! Thanks to a non-user on fan fiction friend who did a quick beta for me!**

**Over the March break I made a quick Superman Returns music video. I think it turned out okay, I used the song "You're beautiful" By James Blunt (My all time favorite song) And I posted it up on you tube. The link is posted on the top of my user profile. I'd really appreciate it if you would, it's been almost a year since I've made a music video.**

**  
Anyway, on with the show… This was uploaded twice.  
**

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**Chapter 20: Junk Mail**

Lois decided to keep to her own business for a little while. She didn't spend as much time obsessing over Clark's secrete. Heck, maybe Jimmy was right, maybe she should just leave him alone. But alone, he would be. She knew, since he never came back to the apartment, that he'd been sleeping at The _Planet_ again, but it didn't disturb her conscience in the least. She was focused on her work, because for once, Perry didn't assign her to a story that had anything to do with Superman.

"How many _'T'_s' are there in...ostentatious?"

Jimmy tossed her a dictionary, and which with horrible aim landed on the floor, "I'm a photographer, Lois. I have no idea how to spell that."

And there it was...when Lois bent down to pick up the dictionary, something gold and glittery dangling out of Clark's pocket, caught her eye.

She looked up directly across the room at Clark, who was busily tapping away at his computer, but it was the shiny, shimmering chain swaying back and forth, that made her freeze.

_Maybe it's a pocket watch..._she tried _so_ hard to convince herself that it did not even somewhat resemble the locket. _His_ locket. _...No, the chain is too thin...it's got to be attached to some form of jewellery..._

She didn't get a long enough look to inspect it more carefully, Clark was suddenly aware that he was being watched, and simply waved at her. She frowned back, too stubborn to get back on speaking terms with him.

Lois turned her attention back to her computer, and attempted to put the locket at the back of her mind, but she couldn't.

She would casually brush by his desk, trying to get a quick peek deeper into his pocket, but could never get close enough. Clark suddenly abandoned his keyboard and handed Jimmy a single piece paper, right before Lois happened to be passing by.

"What's that?" Lois asked, staring down at the sheet Clark had inconspicuously placed in Jimmy's care.

"...Nothing...Clark wanted me to proof his story."

"Can I see it?"

"...He...uh sort of wanted me to look over it first-"

She snatched it out of his hand, and her jaw dropped open at what she found. In giant bold print she read,

_**Young Planet woman raped, where is Superman?**_

"Why is he reading this!?" She fumed at once.

"I don't-"

"Why did you give it to him!?"

"He asked-"

"Who dose he think he is!? God, why can't he just mind his own business!?"

"Oh, and you're one to talk-"

"Shut up, Jimmy!"

She didn't bother to restrain her temper; she marched clear across the newsroom and slammed down the paper on Clark's desk.

"What the hell is this?"

Clark's eyes peeked down, "Well, it looks like an article-"

"Don't you dare play innocent with me, why did you ask Jimmy for this?"

He looked up earnestly at her, "I just wanted to help..."

"Help with _what? _Look, I don't know why you take any sort of interest in this, but I want you to stop!" She'd been humiliated enough, she still remembered the day she walked into the newsroom after the word of her rape and Superman's disappearance had spread through the media like wildfire, she would never forget the look on their faces. Those sick, twisted glances of sympathy and pity. She saw it in Clark's face now, and it made her stomach flip upside-down, it made her feel vulnerable and weak, she would despise him for that.

"That happened a_ long_ time ago, and I would appreciate it if you would keep your nose out of my business!"

Lois seized back the article, crumpled it up quickly and tossed it in the trash. She began to stomp back towards her desk, but turned around instead, "What's in your pocket?" The least he could do was satisfy her restless and curious mind with an answer, so she could refocus herself on her work.

"Hm...?" Clark glanced into his pocket, and Lois watched his eyes widen a little when he saw the chain swinging back and forth.

"Oh...necklace...f-for my mother..." He answered, while swiftly tucking the chain safely back into his jacket.

The two stared quietly for a brief moment, Lois glaring at his suspicious expression until Clark surrendered. "I-I have to go..."

She flashed him an _'I-couldn't-care-any-less'_ sort of look, when he hastily proceeded towards the door. Clark glanced back over his shoulder at her, he opened his mouth to say something, but Lois's ice cold stare discouraged him. Keeping his apologies to himself, he hung his head and stepped into the elevator without another word.

* * *

_Bill...bill...bill...junk...bill...hm, a free sample...junk..._

Jimmy made a mental note to stop giving out his address for those free detergent samples...

Jimmy never got any interesting mail, it was all just junk. He did get the occasional Christmas or Birthday card...maybe a letter or two from his mother, but nothing special.

Until one day he got a particularly odd letter that made him look twice before tossing it out into the garbage.

He inspected it carefully at first, there was no return address. He figured it was just more junk mail, but instead of throwing it into the trash, he decided to open it, and quickly found out, that it wasn't junk mail at all...

* * *

_Crap...crap...crap...bill...crap...major crap..._

Lois made a metal note to stop subscribing to the 'Superman fan monthly newsletter'. She never got any interesting mail, it was all crap. There was of course the odd Christmas or Birthday card, but nothing special.

Until one day she got a particularly odd letter that made her look twice before tossing it out into the garbage with the rest of the junk mail.

It was post marked from the hospital, at first she figured it would be regarding Jason's health, so she opened it...

She wished she hadn't. More than anything in the world, Lois wished she would have ripped it into a thousand tiny pieces and set the remains on fire.

Inside was a scribbled note from Doctor Fallon, Jason's doctor.

_"Dear Ms. Lane,_

_I regret to inform you that Monday's paternity test-"_

She stopped, her heart skipped a beat. _I did **not** take a paternity test..._

The first name that popped up in her mind was,

_Richard._

_That sick, twisted, son of a-!_

_Wait, Richard isn't Jason's father. Oh God, what did they find...?_

She franticly cast her eyes downward again at the letter.

_"-results are not accurate as they were mistakenly mislabelled."_

Translation, they found out Jason wasn't human, and figured something went wrong during the test.

_Thank God..._She let relief flow out of her system with a long, shaky sigh. _They don't suspect anything..._If they did, they certainly wouldn't have invited her back to perform the test again.

Now that she was assured that her sons secrete was still safe, she let herself boil over with rage.

_Who the HELL took this frikin' test!?_

As she searched through the letter once more, her eyes were immediately drawn near the bottom.

_"However, the test does confirm that the two participating subjects were a match,"_

_So...whoever took this test is Jason's father..._she pieced together quickly. _No way, Superman took a paternity test? How? When? Wh-_

_"-but since these results are not completely accurate," _she read on, _"I sincerity apologize for the inconvenience and would like to invite yourself, your son and Mr. Kent-"_

It was as if she forgot to breath. She swore the blood actually froze in her veins. "_Mr. Kent." _She read the same last line over ten times before anything started to register, just to make sure she wasn't going insane. Everything suddenly became so numb, the room was spinning, and the letter slowly slipped out of her fingers as her knees buckled, her eyes closed, and she fainted.

* * *

**:) Want more soon? Please leave a review! -pokes above- Check out meh music video on my user lookup.  
**


	21. Hurt

** I have a lot of people to thank today...  
**

**First, I want to thank everyone who left a review on the last chapter!!!! I was _so_ exited when my mailbox was overflowing with review alerts this morning!! -hugs everyone- You guys have made my week! Also I really want to thank the people who sent me an e-mail reviewing on my music video! -gives you cookies- Thank you so much!  
**

**And last, but certainly not least, Riffti, for the amazing beta job! I think her writing touch has really improved my fic. Thanks Riffti:)**

* * *

**Chapter 21: Hurt **

"H-hey, good morning Lois. I noticed you were looking a little drowsy so…" Clark shyly ducked his head down and placed the steaming cup of coffee on Lois's desk, where she stared blankly at the bright computer screen, pretending to be terribly distracted by randomly clicking away at the mouse.

"That was nice of you." She answered back in a thick monotone, his gesture not particularly appreciated.

"I-I guess I'll just leave you to your work…" He reclined, after a short awkward silence.

Lois realized she could not avoid him forever and would have to confront him sooner or later, the problem was, she didn't quite know _how_…

Option one: Grab him by the tie and drag him out into the elevator, then secretly stab him a million times with Kryptonite. No, though she was very tempted.

Option two: Give him the complete cold shoulder and leave the discussion for later tonight at the apartment where she could really let him have it. Possibly.

Option three: Pretend like nothing is wrong. Like she had never found out, and then she could decide how to react to it later, after she had finished her work professionally.

"Sorry Clark, I'm very busy right now." She forced herself to gaze up and grant him a small smile. It was completely against her will, he didn't deserve to even look at her, let alone be blessed with a smile, but she had to make it convincing.

"Okay, sure. See you...later... "

* * *

Lois poured herself another glass of cheap wine, and placed the bottle within arms reach on the coffee table. She impatiently flicked the channels on the remote as she sipped the sweet nectar, her new best friend; alcohol.

"Why is the news _always_ on? I work for the news, I'm sick of the news. It's the same old crap anyway." She ranted to the television, which of course, wasn't listening.

"_Superman was sighted again in Japan, this time his heroic act of kindness saved the lives of twenty-four Japanese citizens from falling debris due to a recent earthquake_-" The T.V blared, and she flicked the channel again.

"_Man of steel proves himself to be an animal lover today as he put out a forest fire, shielding a mother bear and her two cubs against the_-"

_**Flick.**_

"_No crime too small for our beloved hero today, Superman strikes again. This time seen saving an elderly woman from the likes of a few nasty muggers in_-"

_**Flick.**_

"_He just came out of nowhere! I don__'__t know what we would have done, our farm would have been destroyed from that tornado if Super-__"_

_**Flick.**_

"_Superman_-"

_**Flick. **_

Lois was officially sick of him. She had remained relatively calm since she'd awoken on her kitchen floor in the middle of the night, the last few lines of the letter still swimming through her head.

_How could I have been so dense? How could anyone be so blind? He was right there!_

Lois knew she was only punishing herself by thinking like this, but she couldn't help it. Every single day, he was only a few short steps away. Right across the room, every quick minuscule, insignificant glance she ever gave Clark, she had given to Superman. How could he just sit there and say _nothing_?

She had nothing but resent in her heart for him now, not to mention humiliation. She was disgusted at his nerve to just watch and laugh at all the idiotic little humans, as they were so easily fooled. Lois wanted Superman to suffer, like she did. Maybe it was spiteful and a little heartless, but she didn't care.

"Damn." She muttered under her breath, irritated that his stupid little charade was pushing all her buttons.

"I do hope you're not cursing me…"

That voice, it sent chills of excitement down her spine. But tonight, she would forget those feelings for him.

She didn't even bother too look over towards the balcony window, just kept her eyes directly focused on the television. "No, not you. Stupid cable network."

At the corner of her eye she watched a shade of blue came closer in, through fire escape window.

"Lois, I didn't know you were a fan of Dora the Explorer…"

_**Flick.**_

"There's nothing else on but the news at this time of night." She took another sip of wine.

"Where's Jason?"

"At my mothers for the weekend. I wanted to be with you alone."

"Alone?" He said cautiously.

"Yes."

"What for?"

She shrugged. "Just because."

"Okay...what-"

"You kissed me right?"

A curious look crossed over his face. "What?"

"You kissed me, didn't you? That's how you made me forget."

He didn't say a word, confusion not leaving his eyes as his jaw tightened.

"You remember? That's how you took my memories, right? You kissed me." Lois's glance was still fixed on the TV, as she causally sipped another drink from her glass now half empty, awaiting his response.

"…Yes." He answered at last.

_Good. At least he isn__'__t lying to me. _Her overall intention was to _force_ the truth out of him.

"Humph. Well, thanks for confirming that." _Keep calm Lane. It__'__ll mess with his head_. She found his puzzled expression to be amusing; it gave her a sense of satisfaction. He'd been screwing with her mind all these years, at the least; he owed her the chance to have some fun with his.

He blinked a few times, still utterly bewildered. Lois had had to bite the sides of her cheeks to keep from smirking. Perhaps it was cold, but she was truly enjoying toying with his thoughts. And he deserved it. Revenge was oh, so sweet.

"Lois…where is this…? What are you…?….How…?" He couldn't seem to be able to finish the thought, she watched him struggle to conclude where she was getting all of this information from.

She tipped her head back and drank the last sip of wine, and licked her lips as she reached out for the bottle. She saw Superman's eyes gesture towards the collection of empty glass bottles in the corner of the room.

"Lois, have you been drinking all night?"

"What, those? No, no those aren't from today." She could feel the intensity of his gaze on her face. "They're from yesterday…"

"Lois, there are _seven,_ bottles. You-"

"They gave me quite a hang over too. Oh, I guess I should thank you for the coffee this morning. It really helped clear it up for me."

She finally, tilted her head in his direction. The look on his face was priceless, she wished Jimmy were around with his camera, shooting from every angle.

"Yes I do." She said with a cool calm sigh.

"Wha…?"

"Your face is practically screaming _'does she know?' _So I'm giving you an answer."

She couldn't restrain her amusement any longer; she cracked a smug little grin when his jaw dropped open.

"You...what...how...since when...I..." Lois poured another half glass of wine into her glass and shoved it under Superman's nose. "Are you alright? You look like you need this more than I do." Her smile stretched across her lips so wide her cheeks pinched. But she let it fade slightly, when she saw quick glint of annoyance flash through his eyes. "What's wrong?"

"Alright, I know your angry but-"

"Actually, I'm really not, _Clark_." Speaking his name out loud for the first time since she discovered his secret felt somewhat liberating, but she spat it harshly. "I'm a little hurt, frustrated, stunned, fed-up, embarrassed, heartbroken...the list goes on, but no, no Clarky I am not just angry," She paused for a moment, to reach into her pockets and pull out her lighter and half empty package of cigarettes. "I am...absolutely furious."

"Lois, please, I-"

"Don't you even want to know how I figured it out?" Lois gestured to the envelope on the coffee table placed beside her ashtray.

He carefully removed his gaze off of her and towards the letter; she watched his eyes skimming the note quickly with his X-ray vision. She couldn't help becoming mesmerized at his charming features in the moonlight that shone brightly over his pale face through the window. His expression was so familiar, how could she not notice it before?

_My God, he really _is _Clark_...She'd been partially in denial at first, but she saw it now. He was there, living and breathing in front of her, he'd always been there.

"You...you were _not_ supposed to see that..." He sighed, snapping Lois out of her longing trance.

"I would really appreciate if you would tell me what in the world would ever give you the ridiculous idea to take a paternity test."

"Well, Richard...he was going to take Jason. I-I figured," She could tell he was still in a slight state of shock when he slipped out a stammer. "...that maybe...if Richard thought Jason wasn't Superman's son, but Clark's, then he wouldn't have anything to blackmail you with. We'd have solid evidence, and he'd have no way to swindle the judge into getting custody, because Clark, I mean...I would be the father."

Lois was silent for a moment, the idea rolling around in her mind. She'd have to admit, it was a pretty good plan. Richard wouldn't even have a case if she could prove that Clark was the father.

_Alight, fine. Score one for blue boy_. She praised silently.

He captured back her attention when he lowered his voice, "It was the only way we could have kept Jason safe."

"_We_? What do you mean w_e?_ You mean _you._ You didn't even consult me. What would you have done if the hospital got suspicious? What if they had found something that could link him to you? What would you have done once you had the evidence? Did you think I wouldn't put the pieces together?"

He was slightly taken aback when all these questions were being tossed at him all at once. "I...I don't know..."

"Is that really the best answer you can give me? God, you are so pathetic." Her patience was slowly slipping out of her grasp, as he knelt down beside the couch.

"I'm sorry, Lois. I should have talked to you about it first-"

"I think there are _a lot _of things you should have talked to me about first."

"Listen...I'm sor-"

"_Clark_," she spat sharply again. "I am really not in the mood to listen to your, sappy, half hearted apologies and excuses right now. So unless you've got something to say that's actually worth my time, I want you to get out."

"Please don't-"

"_Out_."

"It's not-"

"_Now_!"

Lois finally stirred up the courage to look him directly into his bright, sky blue eyes. They were not lit up with wonder, and charm, instead they were pools of hurt. She _hurt_ Superman.

"Lois," Clark gazed back miserably over his shoulder, as stepped out onto the balcony, "I truly am sorry, for everything."

Lois stared down at the carpet, ashamed of what she'd said, but she knew he was gone, when the warmth went with him.

* * *

**Well, there you have it. I hope you enjoyed! Please review!!!! **


	22. Gossip

**BIG thanks to Riffti! Riffti, take a bow! Everyone clap! Woot!**

** Enjoy!**

* * *

**Chapter 22: Gossip**

_Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!_ Clark mentally kicked himself.

"_I'm sorry Mr. Kent, but you did not provide us with an address, except that of the child's. Ms. Lane has already been sent a copy of the inaccurate results upon request. If you wish to perform the test again, I will schedule an appointment for you on_-"

"No, that won't be necessary Dr. Fallon. Thank you." Clark hung up the phone with long, heavy sigh. It was his own careless mistake that the paternity results had been sent to Lois instead of his apartment. He had been on the phone all morning discussing the results with Doctor Fallon until he was convinced that the hospital had disposed of the 'inaccurate' results.

"What's the matter, Mr. Clark?" Jason patted Clark on the back kindly. "You look sad."

"Nothing is wrong, but I think your mom is a little angry with me." Clark's eyes darted across the room. Lois had managed to pull herself together nicely, chewing on the end of her pen, skimming over her messy scribbled notes; she sat quietly secluded in the corner.

"But I thought she would be sad too..." Jason said softly.

"Why?"

"Because she will miss you." Jason climbed up on Clark's lap, "I'll miss you too, Mr. Clark."

He blinked a few times, puzzled at Jason's sudden discontent. "What do you mean? Are you...going somewhere?"

"We're leaving soon."

Clark felt his stomach lurch. _Leave? She wouldn't leave...she couldn't be _that_ upset..._He hugged Jason tightly; _she wouldn't take Jason away from me._

"Where are you going?"

Jason tilted his head slightly, "Mommy says I'm not supposed to tell anyone." He bit his lower lip thoughtfully, "but I don't think she would mind if I told _you_…" Jason curved his hands around his mouth and whispered, "We're going to Gotham."

_She's going to Gotham? Why? _Clark knew exactly why she wanted to leave, but the truth made his heart ache.

_She wants to leave the _Planet_, she wants to leave Metropolis, and she wants to leave...me._

"I _know_! Did you hear? I can't believe that she broke up with him!"

"Especially for that dork..."

"Yeah well, that's all she deserves. That slut can't keep her legs together for anybody."

Clark's attention drifted to the corner of the room, where a group of ladies from advertising were huddled together, whispering and snickering. Although, Clark certainly did not need any aid from his Super hearing to pick up every other word. They were giggling and laughing loud enough for even Lois to turn her head in their direction.

"You know, I heard Superman was the one who cheated on her. That's why when he left; she went after Richard so quickly."

"She couldn't keep her panties on long enough for him."

One of the other women grinned crookedly, "Neither could I."

All four them, flew into a fit of giggles. "I have a feeling she was never actually raped," A tall blond women added, "she probably just didn't want anyone to know that she got herself knocked up."

"Well, I feel a little sorry for her kid though. She didn't even have the decency to marry Richard afterwards. Now the poor boy is going to live his life as a bastard."

Clark's jaw tightened, their behavior was that of school children. It was a ridiculous, hearing such repulsive talk amongst people that were supposed to be the _Planet's_ professionals.

He glanced back at Lois, who had stopped chewing on her pen and was staring blankly at the floor. She was listening, she had heard every word those women had to say.

"Oh, but you have to feel at least a little bad for Kent. She led him on for months; she made him think she was in love with him."

"Then the poor guy actually fell for it."

"Did she break off the wedding with him?"

"Obviously. She's been giving him the complete cold shoulder for weeks now."

"Lois and Olsen took off for Smallville a couple of weeks ago. Do you think Kent caught her cheating?"

"I sure wouldn't put it past her."

Clark was used to hearing all the various rude rumors and latest gossip around the office, but for Lois, it must have been devastating to hear her good name trashed like that, and to bring Jason into their disgraceful little gabfest was just _low_.

"Lois, Lois! Do you want a raise...? An office...? A new story…? What do I have to do to get you to stay!?" Perry hollered after her as she slammed the door, marching out of his office. "You can't just quit!"

Clark's mouth dropped open, _She's really going to do it...she's really going to leave. _While he had been distracted by the ignorant circle of chatter, Lois had excused herself into Perry's office where, from what Clark could tell from the bellowing from Perry's outrage; Lois had dropped off her letter of resignation.

She swiftly dodged in between the desks drifting to the opposite side of the room.

"W-wait, Lois!" Clark leapt out of his chair after her and he gently reached out for her arm. "You're not..._really..._"

"Let _go_, Clark." She tugged back slightly, her burning hazel eyes piercing up into his. She wasn't showing any signs of forgiveness at all.

"_Please_ tell me you're not leaving."

"Well, I just gave Perry my two weeks notice."

_Two weeks..._ he had two weeks left with his family.

"What about Jason? You can't just keep dragging him all over the-"

"Who are _you_ to tell me what I can and cannot do with _my_ son?"

"I wasn't trying to... I'm just... you _can'_t leave!"

"I _can't_ stay here!"

"I'll talk to those women and I'll get them to-"

"Oh, we'll you stop it! I don't need you to do anything! And besides, they are not the reason I'm resigning."

"Then what-"

"It's _you_..." her voice dropping low and faint. "I can't stand to come in here and have to stare at you everyday. It hurts too much..."

"Then let me be the one to leave, you shouldn't have to. Your entire life is here, I'll-"

"No, Clark!" She stomped her foot in frustration. "This time, I want to be the one to leave _you_. Now let me _go._"

"Where are you going to go? Where are you going to get a job? What about Richard? He'll find you, Lois!"

She yanked her arm away from his last frantic grasp to hold onto her.

"Lois, don't..." Clark pleaded. "Don't take my son away from me..."

Her face seemed to soften a little, but sill had a hostile tongue. "You can visit him as much as you want. All I ask is that you stay away from _me_."

* * *

**  
**

**I hate gossip. I despise it. My co-workers gossip all the time and I absolutely cannot stand it, anyway, please leave a review!!!! **


	23. Busy birthday

**Beta done by my school friend.**

**Feel free to slap me for taking so long to update. I deserve to be slapped. But I do hope this was worth the wait.**

**Enjoy.**

**Please review!**

* * *

**Chapter 23: Busy birthday**

**Four months later**

_1 cup of flour, 2 cups of sugar, and 4 tablespoons of cocoa..._

Lois quickly skimmed through her mother's old cookbook, which she had dug out from one of the few cardboard boxes left unpacked from the move. It had been hidden away for years, untouched and collecting dust. She never had a need for any family recipes that took hours to cook from scratch, when she could simply pick up the phone and order _Mr. Wong's Chinese take-out_.

But today was different.

_Bake at 350 degrees for approximately forty minutes._

Today, she couldn't just pick up a half frozen, instant ice cream cake from the nearest _Dairy Queen_. Today had to be special, today had to be perfect.

_Balloons... check, streamers... check, vanilla ice cream... check, wrapping paper... check_, Lois reviewed her mental checklist. She smiled to herself as her mind began strolling down memory lane, recalling last year. Jason's fifth birthday party had been a disaster. She had been stuck in traffic for two hours that night, the birthday gifts from relatives were lost in the mail, poor Jason was sick with the chickenpox, and Richard had left the cake and ice cream out of the fridge leaving nothing but a melted, sticky, puddle the next morning.

But this year, she was determined to get things right. This year would require some extra effort.

_Birthday candles... I forgot the candles..._She blinked when she saw the red digital letters on the alarm clock flash to 10 a.m. She yawned, and placed this chocolate cake mix into the oven. She had woken up early on this bright and sunny, summer morning so that she could have everything prepared for when Jason got up.

He had been extremely pleased when the summer holidays came along, but he didn't like the idea of staying cramped inside their new apartment all day.

"What's the point of unpacking?" Jason crossed his arms solemnly. "We're just going to move again anyway."

"You're right; we won't be here for very long. You and I will buy a new house soon."

"I don't want a new house, Mommy. I want to go back to the old house."

"Well that's all the way back in Metropolis, and besides, that's daddy's house now."

"Can we visit him?"

"Not today, he's very busy."

Jason groaned and rolled his eyes, "He's always busy."

Lois used same excuse over and over again, "He's on a business trip," she would say, but Jason

was clever, and these silly excuses were no longer very effective. She'd been avoiding the _official_

confrontation about Richard for months now, but she knew it was coming. Every day, Jason grew more and more curious about the truth of Richard's whereabouts.

But the fact was, she didn't really have any idea where could be. She hadn't spoken to him since the phone call in the hospital, more than four months ago. She secretly hoped that perhaps Richard would finally leave them alone, perhaps now she'd finally be able to live in peace.

Lois stacked the brightly coloured packages onto the dining table. She gazed around the room with a glint of satisfaction in her eye. Blue and red streamers, and balloons were hanging from the ceiling; a small banner was stretched across the kitchen doorway that read "Happy Birthday Jason" in big, bold letters. Everything was perfect. She grinned with pride when Jason, still half asleep and rubbing away at his eyes in his blue Power Ranger's pyjamas, wandered into the kitchen.

"Good morning sweetheart,"

Jason's eyes lit up with amazement at all the colourful decorations "Wow!" He bounced up onto her lap and stretched, "I'm six years old today." He beamed, "So how many more years are there until I can drive a car?"

"You're still about ten years away from even touching the steering wheel, kiddo."

"Oh well..." He sighed, and leaned his head on her chest. "Can we go to the park?"

"We can do whatever you like today. You're the special birthday boy, so you get to choose."

The excited little smile that was beginning to grow on his face, quickly faded when his eyes rested upon the seven extra, little paper birthday hat's in the corner.

"So...are you sure they aren't coming?"

Lois frowned. Jason had given out seven birthday invitations to his classmates, and not even one had shown up.

"I'm sorry Jason, but most people go away in the summer."

He slightly hung his head.

"But we'll still have fun, you go get dressed, and then we can decide what you'd like to do. We

could see a movie, go get ice cream-"

"Strawberry ice cream!" His spirits were easily lifted and he hoped off her knee. Before scurrying

off to his bedroom, he turned around and asked with the slightest bit of hope in his voice, "Is

daddy going to visit today?"

She bit her lower lip pensively, "We'll see." Was her usual response, but she knew she couldn't

wiggle her way out of the question this time. She couldn't lie to her son on his birthday.

"No," She immediately saw his rosy face fall. "I'm sorry Jason, he's still...busy."

He stared blankly out of the window, "Everyone is too busy for me."

* * *

Lois froze. She had just finished wrapping the final gift, when she heard the startling knock at the door.

She stared directly at the handle, which didn't move. Her heart pounded, she'd been extremely cautious since they moved to Gotham. She never gave out her phone number or address to anyone. She almost completely cut off all connections with her old life. She wanted to keep her way of life subtle and ordinary. She wanted to keep Jason safe.

So when this sudden unexpected visitor came to the door she immediately became anxious. No one was supposed to know where they were.

_It__'__s not the landlord…_ she skimmed over the possibilities of who the stranger could be, struggling to calm herself down. _I already paid the rent this month…_

She decided she would try to ignore it, but the knock came again, and again, harder and harder

with each tap.

Whoever was at the door was very far too persistent. They knew she was home.

The knock came once more, _If it were Richard_, she considered reasonably to herself, _He wouldn__'__t _

_have bothered to knock…_

She swallowed, this was stupid. Lois Lane didn't hide from anyone. She looked quickly over her shoulder, making sure Jason was safe in his room. She edged forward to the door apprehensively. She gripped the cold, brass knob tightly and twisted it open…

"H-hi."

Her jaw dropped open and she motioned to slam it shut again,

"Wait!"

She left the wooden door open just a sliver, so she could still see the black trim of a pair of thick glasses.

"What are you doing here?" Her tongue demanded with hostility.

"I wanted to... I thought…" The vivid, sky blue eyes hidden behind the glasses glanced downwards at a package wrapped up in a bright, red bow. "I was just wondering, if you could give this to…to Jason."

Lois slightly thinned the crack of the open door.

"You don't have to tell him who it's from, I would just really appreciate it if you-"

"Leave it outside." She squeezed the handle tighter. His presence made her tense and uncomfortable.

"Oh…okay…"

"Mommy, who's at the door? Is it daddy? Is it grandma and grandpa? Is it-"

Jason's enthusiasm got the better of him as he pushed passed Lois and swung the door wide open.

"Mr. Clark!" His eyes widened, Lois watched her son leap into Clark's arms.

"Did you know it was my birthday today?"

"I did, and I brought you a present."

Jason's smile was priceless as he cuddled Clark close. "Thank you so much! I missed you a lot. Why didn't you come to visit more?"

Lois hadn't seen Jason so thrilled about anything in months. Yet Clark's simple company was enough to bring out cheerfulness in him that she thought would never come back.

"I've been…busy." He beamed warmly back at Jason.

"Are you busy today?"

"Nope, I wanted to come and wish you a happy birthday."

"Are you going to visit all day? Will you stay for my party?"

"Well…" Clark glanced nervously up at Lois. "I'd really love to, Jason. But-"

"Clark is busy," Lois said firmly. "He's leaving now."

"What? Why? He is not! He came to see us!" Jason protested confidently. "Right, Mr. Clark? You came here to stay with us."

Lois crossly folded her arms. She didn't need Clark to make her son happy. She didn't need him

at all. For four months she lived in peace, untouched by all of his feelings and bothersome

responsibilities. She finally had the simple life. The life she had before he came back and wrecked it all. At this moment, if she didn't put a stop to this now, he would wreck it again.

"He can't, Jason." She gazed back down at Clark, whose eyes were practically begging her to stay.

"Why are you making him leave!?" Jason raised his voice. "He's not busy! You said I could choose what I wanted for my birthday," Jason wrapped his arms around Clark's waist, "I want Mr. Clark to stay."

_If I left him stay here now, it__'__ll encourage him to come back_, she dejected the idea after a silent moment. _He__'__ll wreck it…_A little voice rang through her head, _He__'__ll wreck everything I__'__ve worked so hard for._

"Jason," She said steadily, "Please, go to your room and wait for me."

"No."

"Now," Her tone commanded.

"No! Why do you make everybody go away? You made daddy go away! It's your fault he can't come to my birthday party! Now you're making Mr. Clark go away too!" Jason's eyes were swelling with frustrated tears. "I want him to _stay!_"

Jason kicked the door with all his might, and to her amazement, the wooden door she had clutched so securely, was ripped of the hinges and sent crashing across the room.

There was a look of horror that passed over her son's face that she had never seen before. When he realized what he'd done, his tears overflowed and dripped down his cheeks.

He gazed hopelessly up at his mother, confused, and then turned back to the disaster that he'd created in the living room. "I'm sorry mommy." He whispered softly through the panting of his sobs, and suddenly dashed back into the apartment.

"Well, there you go," Lois turned to Clark and let her arms drop to her sides. "You did it. You wrecked it again."

"You have to let me talk to him."

"That's the last thing you're going to do. He was fine this morning."

"He needs to know that it wasn't his fault-"

"I can handle it."

"You can't-"

"Leave us alone, Clark."

His face fell, "You...you said I could visit. How am I going to teach him about-?"

"You're not going to teach him anything."

"Then how is he going to learn how to use his abilities-"

"I don't want him to learn how to use them, because I don't want him to be like you!"

She was shaking with anger. "I know what you go through, Clark. I know what danger you get into. I know what Luthor has done to you. I don't want Jason to have that life."

Clark shook his head slowly, "Lois, did you think that if I stayed away, Jason wouldn't develop his

abilities?"

She clenched her fists. It sounded so stupid when he said it out load. "I was just trying to protect him." She looked the other way at the catastrophe that lay in her living room.

"I know he's going to get them, I just don't want him to use them the same way you do."

Clark stepped forward and dared to place his hand lightly on her shoulder. "Lois, you know I believe you can do anything. But you can not raise Jason on your _own_. You need help."

Her eyes were still fixed on the broken shambles of the door. She knew he was right, she knew she needed his help.

"I do..." She began slowly, "I do want you to be a part of his life." She paused, and then added, "But not yet."

Clark shifted, "Then when-"

"I don't know. Just not yet. You need to go away now."

"Just let me speak to him. I'll give you as much time as you need, I promise. Just let me see him for a minute-"

"Go away," She sniffed, "Please."

Clark's heart broke, she could see the disappointment glistening in his eyes. He stepped back, he didn't speak, he didn't need to. His eyes said it all.

Lois went back into the kitchen, listing to Jason's muffled sobs from his bedroom. She bent down to look inside the oven, she had missed the timer. She was now staring a giant, crispy, charcoal pastry.

Just like the perfect day she had planned all month, Jason's special birthday cake, was ruined.

* * *

**To be updated next week! I promise!**

**Please review!!! They are more appreciated than anything else!!**


	24. Guardian angel

**This chapter was uploaded twice.**

**Enjoy.**

* * *

**Chapter 24:** **Guardian angel**

_"We can expect some high winds in Kansas throughout the rest of the day. Residents are warned to stay away from windows and keep a flashlight nearby in case of a power outage." _

"Morning C.K," Jimmy strolled by Clark's desk with an unusual spring in his step.

He plopped down in his swivel chair and spun around twice with a large lopsided grin on his spread across face.

"What's got you in such a giddy mood today?" Clark pushed his glasses onto the bridge on his nose.

"I met someone last night," Jimmy did another full rotation in his chair. "A girl. Well, an old friend. We dated back in college and I hadn't seen her in yeas."

"That's...good." Clark choked. Jimmy came into work with enough spunk to do a back flip, while Clark had watched his own love life flush down the toilet. "Is she nice?"

"She's great! I can't wait for you to meet her."

"...Meet her?"

"Yeah, she starts work here in a couple of weeks."

"So, she's a journalist?"

Jimmy nodded quickly, "Perry hired her to replace Loi-" He bit back his tongue when he saw Clark's face fall. "Um...well, anyway. I'll let you watch the..." He stared up at the television hanging above the desk that Clark had been watching so intently.

"Weather...network..."

Jimmy cleared his throat, and left Clark alone with the dull, droning report from the weatherman.

* * *

Martha peered out the dusty kitchen window and pulled back the ragged, blue plaid curtain.

"It's going to be a rough night," Ben Hubbard joined her at the window.

She winced, listening to the roar of the thunder and cracking whip of the lightning. The dark, looming clouds rolled swiftly across the plains. There was a powerful stream of wind that shook the rickety foundations of the old farmhouse. The wooden floorboards creaked and squeaked under their feet, "I don't know if the roof can take it," She sighed, staring up at the rotting wood and dripping, leaky ceiling. "You'd better get moving Ben. I don't want you getting caught in the storm on the way home."

"You're sure you'll be alright on your own tonight, Martha? I could wait it out here. The weather channel said it shouldn't be long."

"Nonsense Ben, you get on home. I'm fine, these walls have seen much worse over the years."

"I suppose I should get the cattle in before the rain." He stretched and made his way towards the door. "I'll see you tomorrow. You won't beat me again." He promised, and gave her a wink.

"Scrabble isn't really your game," She smiled warmly back at her old companion. "Perhaps you'd have more luck with cards."

"Shall we try old maid next time?" He chuckled, and she slapped him lightly on the shoulder.

"_Get_, and don't come late. It's not polite to keep a lady waiting."

Ben reached out for her well aged, skinny arm placed a gentle kiss on her hand.

"Until tomorrow," He nodded his head and stepped out onto the porch. He staggered backwards from the powerful blow of the wind. The door flung to the sideways and Martha raced to lock it shut again.

The fuzzy radio became clear for a brief moment before cutting short to the static again. "_The state of Kansas has issued a tornado alert for Smallville. Lock all doors and windows. In case of emergencies_-"

The shaggy, liver-coloured flat-coated retriever sleeping in the corner of the kitchen raised its head towards the window and gave a low growl.

"Shh, Shelby." Martha stroked the dog lightly on the head, "It's just the wind."

* * *

"_Pa! Close the window_!"

"_Get outside to the_-"

"_Pa!" _The little girl screamed for her father in terror. "_The water! I'm trapped!" _Clark heard the deadly shattering of glass, and the rushing of running water.

He flew faster and arrived on the grassy plain just in time to see the house come crashing down on the family of two. He heard the horrified, trembling girl cry for help again.

Clark concentrated on listening for any sign of her guardian. He focused his hearing past the roaring wind, past the dozens of other cries for help, past the yelling little helpless girl, and listened to the beating of her father's heart. He wasn't breathing, and his heart had a slow unsteady pace.

Clark drove himself through one of the broken windows and into what must had been a living room at one point. There was no light; it was a pitch black disaster. The roof had already fallen and everywhere he stepped there shattered glass, pieces of drywall, and even drops of blood.

"Hello!" Clark cried out into the wreckage. He followed the weak sound of heartbeat into a bathroom. He glanced up at part of the ceiling that had managed to withstand the storm. There was a flashing blue spark cable hanging only inches away from the floor which was flooded with water. Clark strained to see into the darkness and he saw the faint outline of a figure on the floor. He edged closer and realized it was the man. His face was engulfed in the puddle of water.

"Please God, send me an angel. Please protect all my friends from the storm."

Clark peered through the tattered white shower curtain and saw the little curled up in a ball hugging her knees and praying silently to herself.

"And please keep my daddy safe in heaven. And please let him be with mommy, and grandpa." Her tears stung Clark's heart. "Please send me an angel."

"Hello." Clark said meekly and the blond little girl's head shot up in alarm. She was immediately frightened of the large intimidating, dark man standing in her bathroom doorway.

"Don't worry," He reassured her in a deep, calm voice. "I'm here to help you. What's your name?" He knew he was running out of time, but the girl began to retreat backwards; still apprehensive about his intentions. He needed her to trust him, so he could carry herself and her father out quickly.

"Lisa." She whispered quietly.

"Lisa," He repeated. "It's okay," Clark reached out his arm passed the now violently shaking spark cable.

"Are you hurt, Lisa?"

She timidly shook her head. "No."

"That's good, because I need you to help me. I am going to hold this cord up really high, and when I say '_go_' I need you to crawl out of the bathtub and grab my hand."

Clark made out the brilliant brown eyes shyly analyzing her surroundings with uncertainty.

"Do you think you can do that for me?"

"I can't..." She whined shaking at the sight of the sparking cord and slippery cold water. "You're going to be alright. But I need you to do this Lisa. I know you can be a brave girl, it will only be for a second or two."

"What about Papa?" She sobbed, gazing down grimly at her father's motionless body. "I don't want to leave him here."

"I'll get your father, but I need you to come to me first. I need you to do as I say. I promise I will get him right after you come out."

Lisa took only a few seconds to make her decision before she agreed. "Okay..."

Clark lifted the cord high above his head and out of reach of the water that had began flowing like a stream out of the pipes.

"Are you ready?"

"Y-yes." She stammered uneasily.

"Okay. One...two...three...go!"

Lisa dipped her toe into the freezing water hesitantly, but then suddenly abandoned the safety of the bathtub and dashed across the room to Clark's side and gripped his hand tightly.

"Good job," He praised her quick obedience and courage. "Now, I need you to take two giant steps backwards."

Lisa did as she was instructed. Clark, very, very gently, blew a stream of icy cold breath onto the end to cap the sparking end of the cable. He lowered it again and stepped forward hastily and grabbed the man out of the water. He rushed back to where Lisa was standing and quickly scooped her up onto his back and hovered outside towards the lawn. He looked down at the little blond ten year old girl who trembled in his arms. It was only when they reached the light did Lisa recognize the familiar emblem on his chest. "Superman..." And a very small, shaken smile formed across her lips.

"God did send me an angel, after all."

* * *

After six long, agonizing hours, Clark was mentally exhausted. He hovered amongst the dreary clouds for a brief moment to catch his breath, so to speak. They were still crying. There were so many people; he couldn't catch up with all the damage the tornado left in its destructive path. All he could do was move from one victim to the next. Most cases had been like the first. The people were trapped their collapsed little farmhouses or buried under the layers of rumble. And he could only do so much at one time.

_Three..._Clark counted miserably to himself;_ I__'__ve already lost three..._

Three innocent lives were sacrificed to the storm. One, that particularly outstood the rest in his restless mind, was a twelve year old boy that, Clark later found out was named Brian.

He had been paralyzed from the waist three years ago down due to his bike colliding with a drunken truck driver. This was an accident that Clark _should_ have been there to prevent.

His wheel chair crashed down the staircase in his panicked attempt to join his family in securely locked cellar.

Clark had heard the terrorizing screams from Brian's mother as she shouted her child's name. The twisted column of wind, without hesitation, smashed through the walls and sucked up the shingles that had been shielding Brain from the debris. At the same time, Clark also heard the painful snap of Brian's arm bending backwards.

The remaining walls gave way on top of him. Brian frightfully pleaded for his life, but the storm would not allow it. By the time Clark had managed to release four other civilians trapped in a stable, they boy had died quickly from lack of oxygen. Brian had buried alive under tones of rubble and debris.

Clark squinted to see further ahead in the distance.

He had the long, spinning, black pillar of wind in view. A clanking, old rusty truck sped down the asphalt highway with tornado not far behind, almost as if it were chasing after the driver. He figured it was another team of those bothersome 'tornado chasers,' who were foolish enough to get too near the powerful column of wind for the sake of video footage.

Clark saw the driver make a fatal mistake out of panic. He swerved to the side, losing control of the vehicle, and before Clark could swoop out of the clouds the truck flipped upside down onto the edge of the road.

He raced out of the sky towards the scene and quickly scanned the inside of the overturned tuck for any sign of movement. There was a long, dragged groan from the driver, so Clark didn't waste another second. He wrapped his hands around the top of the truck and felt his fingers grinding into the metal as he gained a firm grip.

He carried it a few feet above ground before placing down gently out into the middle of a nearby pasture and out of the tornado's pathway.

He flew around to the side of the vehicle and in one swift gesture he tore off the door. His eyes widened, slightly taken aback at the familiar face of the half conscious man still tightly locked in the safety of his twisted seatbelt.

_Ben Hubbard..._

There was a giant purple bruise on the right side of his forehead from where he had smacked it off the cracked window shield.

A trickle of blood leaked out of his mouth, his eyes were closed but the dark red stained lips were muttering.

"Sir, can you hear me?" Clark spoke deep and commanding tone, but Ben didn't respond. He continued to mumble senseless sounds and gibberish that Clark could not make into words.

"I'm going to take you to the hospital," Clark knew his reassurance fell on deaf ears but he still rose his voice, hoping to capture the attention of the semi conscious old man.

As he reached inside and ripped the thick material of the seatbelt in two, his ears took notice of a soft spoken hush of breath from Ben, which Clark's keen hearing recognized as a single familiar name, "Martha..."

* * *

"Mom!" Clark struggled through the debris, the shattered remains that were once his home.

"Where are you!?" Clark searched frantically in the ruins for any sign of movement.

_I should have got here sooner..._ He let the butterflies of guilt flutter around his stomach.

Clark suddenly took notice of a sharp yelp, followed by a few clawing sounds coming from further within the house.

"Shelby!" Clark called out, when he saw the shaggy, limping dog trying to dig through the rubble. "Here boy,"

Shelby lifted his head slightly in Clark's direction and barked twice. Clark crawled cautiously forward, afraid he might cause more of the house to crumble with any sudden movements.

"Clark..." There was a soft muffled reply out of the darkness, "Here."

"Mom!" Clark seized the giant pieces of wood and glass that Shelby had been clawing away at and a figure began to edge her way out of the dark hole in the ground.

"Are you alright?" Clark lifted his mother out of the cellar when she didn't respond.

Shelby commanded Clark's attention with another bark. He turned around, wagging his tail and lead them to what once was a familiar kitchen. Sunlight leaked through the holes and Clark pushed himself off the ground and in one swift movement he broke through the wall.

As he took off into the clouds, he looked down below him to see the farmhouse in shambles. The place that he had held most sacred to his heart, the place that contained all his childhood memories, his home, was destroyed.

* * *

Clark drew in a deep breath. The sight of his peacefully sleeping mother allowed him to relax.

He set aside the yellow bouquet of tulips on the night table beside the hospital bed.

The last few hours had been chaos. He rushed both Ben and his mother to the hospital, but wasn't able to stay there for very long.

More desperate cries filled the air, and Clark didn't intend to just sit back and ignore them. But now, finally, after all his hard work, Clark was able to be at his mother's side and rest.

Martha suddenly woke with a start as Clark took his seat; her eyes fluttered open in confusion, but were aware of her son's presence.

"Clark..."She lifted her head up off the pillow slowly.

"I'm here mom," he squeezed her hand lightly.

"What-"

"There was another storm." He dimmed her confusion. "A big one."

His eyes glanced shamefully downwards, "I'm sorry." He apologized immediately. "I should

have there much sooner. I should have-"

"Don't you dare start with me, Clark." Martha scolded softly, staring him straight in the eye.

"You have nothing to be sorry about."

"But-"

"Hush," She put a finger to her lips.

Clark lowered his voice, "I-if I hadn't found Ben Hubbard on the side of the road I-"

"Ben?" She inquired curiously. "What happened? Is he alright?"

Clark tightened his grasp on her hand. "He's in pretty bad shape, actually."

Martha chewed her bottom lip thoughtfully and landed back again on her pillow. Her anxious eyes glanced upwards at the ceiling tiles of the roof. They were glazed over with worry and Clark could tell she was troubled.

"I'm sorr-"

"You know," She exhaled drowsily. "The buyers won't take the house like that."

"I'll fix it," He promised. Clark had been always against the very idea of his mother selling his childhood farm in the first place, but it wasn't his decision to make.

"Don't worry. I'll take care of it all."

He gave her a comforting little half smile.

"Clark," Martha beamed warmly up at her son. "How did I ever manage five years without you?"

She began to drift back into a deep restful slumber as Clark stood up to take his leave. But before he began down the hallways, he heard the quiet, low whisper from his mother,

"My guardian angel."

* * *

**Well, how was that? I needed a little break from all the romantic stuff.**

**I'll be blunt. I really have no idea when this will be updated next. I have exams all week and am very busily working on a Clois one-shot that I hope you'll enjoy. It won't be too long, but I'm sorry to say you're all in for a little wait until exams are over.**

**But don't fret, after that, I'll have the entire summer to write :)**

**So to keep your minds thinking, who do you suppose Jimmy's new girl is? -wink-_ Smallville _fans may be able to guess...**

**I want to give a HUGE double thanks to my beta _Riffti_!!!!!!! This story wouldn't be possible without her!**

**I also want to thank _sportchick359 _and _Elliesmeow_, who gave me some wonderful reviews, but I think they were lost, as this fic was uploaded twice to fix a minor error.  
**

**You're reviews are very much appreciated!!!! Please leave a review??!**


	25. Darkness

** So, here we are! One year later! That's right, I've been writing this story for a year now! YAY!  
I want to thank all of my readers, and especially the ones who take the time to leave a review. Without you all, this wouldn't have been possible. I've learned a lot from writing this fic, and I've taken into account every single little suggestion you all have given me. Thank you for helping me become a better writer.**

* * *

**Chapter 25: Darkness**

Jimmy Olsen hated the dark.

When he was young, Jimmy would sleep with a tiny, plastic nightlight in the shape of a clown, until he was fifteen years old. He would never go camping when he was a child, and he was probably the only little boy in all of Metropolis who hated the darkness, and everything else that was spooky about Halloween.

So now, tapping his foot anxiously against the pavement, Jimmy crossed his arms impatiently and tried to distract himself by focusing his eyes upward and staring at the bright, bleached white marble hanging in the sky. He was eager to retreat back into the comforts of his little one bedroom apartment on the seventh floor, and out of the dark, dingy little alleyway he so nervously paced back and forth in.

_This was a stupid idea..._The wise voice of common sense whispered at the back of his mind. _If I meet them, they'll kill me. If I avoid them, they'll kill Clark, Lois, Chloe and _then _kill me._

Jimmy shifted uneasily, his eyes beginning to adjust to the darkness.

_I should have just told Clark._ Jimmy reasoned with himself. _He would have known exactly what to do._

A dreaded knot of anticipation twisted around in his stomach. _Too late now._

He clutched the long, wrinkled, manila envelope tightly against his chest. What lay concealed inside this envelope was to be blamed for his secretive, nightly errand this evening.

It contained several black and white photographs that Jimmy had received along with the rest of his bills and junk mail. The four enlarged, color drained photos had confirmed all of his suspicions.

Jimmy had first become aware of Clark's peculiar need for secrecy the day Lois approached him with her large, thick folder, stacked with documents revealing Clark's unusual personal history.

The odd amount of questionable evidence that Lois had been able to gather was enough to strike Jimmy with a lightning bolt of curiosity towards his oblivious, mild mannered friend.

_And look what a mess my curiosity has got me into._

For the first time in his life, Jimmy regretted the day he decided to make photographer his chosen career path. He could have been a stockbroker, a fireman, a teacher, heck, he'd even take garbage man right now.

"Why did you mail these to _me_?"

It didn't make any sense to him. What good would it do to send these photographs to anyone but Clark?

"You are a photographer at the _Daily Planet_, correct?"

Jimmy didn't respond, his silence made up for an obvious answer.

He was sick of these ridiculous phone calls and threatening letters. He hated having to think that around every corner he turned, someone could be waiting for him. He hated having to watch every move he made, knowing that there was a possibility of being watched.

And he hated, most of all, the idea that the master manipulator behind all of his worries was using _his _camera to spy on the people around him, including innocent people, like Chloe.

The first few strange calls, Jimmy had brushed off as a prank or a wrong number.

Then, he began to receive the letters, but he would roll his eyes at someone's idea of a good joke and toss them into the trash without another thought.

But finally, he opened the manila envelope, and with one glance at the photographs, Jimmy decided to speak with the voice on the other end of the phone line.

"Who better to send them to than a man on the inside? You, Mr. Olsen, have the power of the press within your palms."

Jimmy carefully inspected each one of the pictures.

_How could anyone have ever taken something like this without Clark noticing?_

The first photograph was rather simple, a scene often found at the _Daily Planet_. Clark, working quietly at his desk and minding his own business, with Jason sitting contently on his lap.

Jimmy had pondered over this photo the most, specifically because there was nothing particularly out of the ordinary with the simple setting.

The second was a little more unusual. The photo captivated a clear picture of Superman, but not like Jimmy had ever seen him. Superman was smiling. Not the triumphant, heroic smile that Jimmy and the rest of Metropolis were accustomed to. No, this smile was filled with warmth, and kindness. This smile was clearly not just handed out to anyone. Superman was leaning over what appeared to be a hospital bed, one that a sleeping Lois Lane took rest in. Her eyes were closed; she was laying peacefully in the comforts of her dreams, while Superman smiled down at her, a hint of pride at how beautiful she looked, in his face.

_This must have been taken not long after Lois was shot._ Jimmy concluded silently.

The third photo made Jimmy blink several times in confusion. This picture was focused on both Superman and Lois. They were embracing each other with such a sweet passion even Jimmy could appreciate the tender moment between the couple.

It was now perfectly obvious to Jimmy that someone had been spying on them.

However, these three pictures were very private moments, how would anyone been able to take these photos without Superman noticing? That was the question that had boggled around in Jimmy's mind for the last few months. Jimmy had always intended to tell Clark what he knew. Perhaps if he had, some of the mind twisting questions would have been resolved with a few explanations. But when Lois left, Clark had enough on his mind to worry about. Jimmy didn't want to become a part of his troubles.

_But I should have warned him,_ He twitched when a sick pang of guilt passed through his stomach. _I should have warned both of them._

The final photo enclosed in the envelope, didn't come of as much of a shock to Jimmy as he would have expected. This picture, unlike the others, was in color. This photograph was focused on only one person, yet at the same time, focused on another.

There they stood, together as one man. The yellow and red emblem on his chest was almost unrecognizable, half of it was concealed by Clark Kent's white office shirt and tie. His glasses were swept off of his face and dangled carelessly in his right hand. His concentrated expression led Jimmy to suppose that he was listening far off into distance.

A devious smirk appeared across Jimmy's lips. He felt proud to finally be sure that his suspicions about Clark Kent were certain. But he knew that having this knowledge would come with a price. Jimmy knew that he would have to be extremely careful now. There was a reason Clark never told anyone about who he was. It was dangerous, Jimmy knew that. And he also knew that Clark would be counting him to keep his secret safe.

"What exactly is it that you want from me?" Jimmy had spat harshly into the phone to the voice on the other end.

"Isn't it obvious?" The voice crackled. "I want you to expose him."

Jimmy's mouth fell open as he pressed the phone closer to his ear.

"You would be paid handsomely of course."

Jimmy was outraged by the very idea, "If you think that you can bribe me into betraying Clark Kent, then you can go to-"

"Mr. Olsen, I had no intention on using bribery alone to change your way of thinking."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

The voice on the end of the line clicked off. Jimmy stared blankly at the phone. Stunned, when he realized what he had been sucked into.

One week later after his conversation, Jimmy found another letter, with another photo in his mailbox. It was not of Superman, or Clark, or Lois, but of a young bright, blond woman.

At first glance, Jimmy didn't recognize the women at all. She was about his age, perhaps a little younger. She was walking innocently down the street with a long, flowing skirt touching her ankles. Her shoulder length, blond hair shimmered in the sunlight and whisked back in the gentle breeze.

After a minute or two of staring at the picture, a familiar name began to appear out of Jimmy's memories.

It was her, it had to be. The same hair, the same eyes, the same expression,

_Chloe Sullivan._

Jimmy flipped over the photograph. Written in on the other side in black permanent marker, he read,

**It means blackmail.**

Jimmy felt his fists clench together in anger and disgust.

"Why don't you just do it yourself?" He had asked the voice before hanging up, "Why do you need me?"

"There are certain...complications, which do not permit me to release this information out on my own."

_Complications...as if._

Jimmy tapped his shoe harder against the ground.

_I'm not going to do it. I won't betray Lois and Clark._

Now, it had been several months since he received the photographs that he pressed so firmly to his chest.

He never did show anyone the photographs, and he certainly didn't give them to the _Planet_. So, when there was no headline released at the _Planet_ titled_, Superman Exposed_, Jimmy found himself opening a final mysterious letter.

**14th Street**

**Saturday**

**3:00am**

**Alleyway**

**Be there.**

Jimmy shuttered. He wasn't stupid. He knew why this alley was chosen.

Because this wasn't just any alleyway.

Jimmy was very familiar with this alley. So was most of the entire staff at the _Planet_. Everyone knew what happened down here. Everyone knew that the crime committed, happened right on the cold, stone pavement that Jimmy stood so uneasily upon now. Everyone knew, the unfortunate incident that occurred in this alleyway, destroyed Lois Lane as they knew her. Jimmy suspected that whoever may be behind the lens that captured these photos, may have been linked to the man who decided to have his way with Lois in this alley, five years ago.

All Jimmy could do now, was wait.

And when the time finally came for the shady, muscular figure to creep out of the darkness, fashionably late, Jimmy was unprepared for the attack.

Jimmy stumbled backwards, a sudden shadow flashing at the corner of his eye. He turned every which way in a frenzy of panic. His breaths were heavy, a surge of adrenalin pumping through his veins. The shadow began to multiply, moving all along the walls. His brain commanded his feet to run, but they didn't listen. He was too afraid to run. Jimmy stayed fixed to the ground. His eyes buzzed this way and that, searching for the figure concealed within the shadows. His imagination was running wild, and beginning to get the better of him. An eerie silence dawned upon the alley. No roaring traffic or howling dog in the distance. His ears could only pick up the intense sound of his own racing heart, and the rushing of footsteps amongst the darkness.

"Who's there?" Jimmy's frantic cry out of panic echoed off the towering walls of the alley.

The footsteps grew louder; the shadows flashed quicker, his heart pounded harder.

Jimmy didn't have time to brace himself when a large, powerful arm reached over his head and wrapped itself securely around his throat.

"What's your problem, Olsen?" A hot rush of air blew into his ear, and a sleek, velvet voice whispered, "Were you scared? Was that it? Did you think he would come after you? Why didn't you print the photos, _Olsen_?"

The binding grasp tightened around Jimmy's neck. The one arm alone overpowered his struggling. He strained to breath, choking on his own saliva.

"I have your money right here, Olsen. You could have been rich. You wouldn't have had to work another day in your life."

Jimmy could feel the air deflating from his lungs.

"All you had to do was print the photos. You would have been famous, you would have been known as the photographer who unmasked the man of steel."

His vision blurred, he felt his consciousness fading away. He let the manila envelope slip from his fingers.

"But you just had to go and ruin all that for yourself," The voice mocked, "It's too late to go back. Not only are you going to print those photos, but you're also going to give all the credit to _me_."

Jimmy's head began to spin. He began falling into darkness, when he felt a sharp, razor edge pierce through his flesh. His eyes went wide, a fire of streaming pain ripped through his side. He bit down on his tongue to avoid a scream. A faint grunt of shock escaped his lips. The death grip around his throat was finally released. Jimmy's trembling knees gave way as he dropped to the pavement. He sucked in a desperately desired gasp of air. His eyes tightly closed, he placed his hand on the wound. He felt the blood seeping through his shirt.

"Next week, when I pick up a copy of the _Planet_, I better see a more _interesting_ headline." The figured bent down, and leaning over Jimmy's ear he whispered, "Or I won't be so kind next time."

Jimmy couldn't keep his agonizing pain bottled up any longer. He moaned, when the figure wrapped his hand around the handle of the blade, and tore it from his flesh. The figure held the sharp metal blade up towards the sky, so that Jimmy could see his own blood shimmering in the pale moonlight.

"You have one week."

The figure snatch the manila envelope, he removed one of the photos and placed it in front of Jimmy's face on the ground. Jimmy stared longingly at the photo, as he watched the shadow place the blade squarely across the picture of Chloe.

"And so does she."

Jimmy lay helplessly on the ground, a trickle of blood leaking from his mouth when the figure left a lasting impression, and kicked him twice in his stomach and face. He strained to see through the sweat stinging his eyes. He squinted, focusing on the outline of the dark figure, which cautiously crept through the shadows of the alley. The figure made his way out of the cloak of darkness and stepped out onto the road. For a brief moment, the streaming, gold glimmer from the street light cast a dim glow over the figure's face. The light revealed the aggressor for a split second, before he vanished back into the shadows. Jimmy drew in a sharp breath when his memories took him back several months ago, and he was able recognize and identify his attacker.

_Richard._

* * *

**So now, you're all caught up with Jimmy. I hope this chapter has cleared a few things up for you. Please leave a review, as I stated before, it helps me along with the writing process.This beta was done by one of my school friends, who is slowly getting sucked into Superman!Thanks, Lilly! **


	26. Chloe

**I feel so guilty for having to make you wait for long. I'm still writing this fic, and I intend to take it much farther. I've been blessed with so many new ideas for this fic. I just hope I haven't lost any of my readers... **

**Please let me know you're still out there! Leave a review? **

**Huge thanks to my beta, Lilly!**

**Another hug for _Riffti_ ( for not yelling at me, Riff...)  
**

* * *

**Chapter 26: Chloe**

_Smallville_, Lois chewed her bottom lip anxiously awaiting the images, about to appear across her television screen, from the wreckage left by the tornado that tore through Smallville, several days ago.

_No..._Her heart sank. A wave of disappointment washed away her hope when the news report flashed the picture of the familiar little farmhouse in ruins. The rusty, red mailbox painted with the dark, black letters spelling out _Kent, _lay before the debris of the house, the pole snapped in three places.

Lois felt a sharp pang of pity. _His home...it's gone._

"Mommy," A tiny voice peeped.

Lois peeled her attentive stare from the picture and refocused it towards Jason.

His eyes were half open, and he dragged along tattered, shabby, brown teddy bear he had received at birth, across the carpet. His head was tilted to the side curiously, and the light brown mop on the top of his head was a shaggy, bed head of hair. "I'm hearing it again,"

_Again..._Lois sighed to herself. "Is it loud like last time?"

Lois had recently been faced with the challenge of Super-hearing. All of Jason's new abilities were becoming more and more a part of everyday life. His hearing was developing more rapidly than the others, and Jason had awoken several times in the night crying and shouting in the pain.

Jason shook his head. "No. It's different."

The blank expression on her son's face was unmistakeable. It was distant, and haunting. It was _his _look. It was concentrated, and perhaps a little puzzled. She knew Jason was becoming more familiar with his powers. But he had questions, questions that Lois couldn't answer. His loneliness became apparent to her when his Super-hearing kicked into hyper drive. Everyday he became a little more isolated. He didn't want to draw pictures anymore. He didn't want to play outside, and he didn't want to watch television. He just wanted to be alone in a trace with his thoughts and the rest of the world echoing in his ears.

Lois would never admit it to herself, but she was overwhelmed with uncertainty. She didn't know exactly what Jason was going to be put through everyday, and she had no idea how to help him.

Although she did do the best she could. She would try to help his focus on only listening to one particular sound at a time. But her efforts had relatively no effect when it came to his strength. His sudden outburst of emotions caused frequent tantrums, resulting in many more shattered pieces of broken furniture.

Jason wandered closer and joined her on the sofa; he didn't remove his intense, day dreamy gaze from the window.

"What do you hear?" She asked calmly, putting her arms around his tense muscles.

He hesitated before responding, to be sure of his answer, "Two people." He nodded to himself confidently.

"Men or women?" Lois would occasionally ask for specific details on what he was hearing. She thought perhaps there was some come kind of pattern, linking together every sound Jason picked up on.

It was only a theory, she wasn't aware of the details involved with Super abilities. But it hadn't played out well. He heard animals, vehicles, people speaking other languages, even the high winds from the tornado that hit Smallville. Lois failed to find any connection between the sounds.

"Men." He answered without a doubt. "They're grown ups."

"Where do you think they are?"

Jason squinted, "I'm not sure, but they're talking about...photographs." He frowned, "One of them is really angry. I think I recognize his voice."

Lois stiffened, "You do?" She rubbed her gentle hand around his back. "Who does it sound like?"

Jason took almost a full minute to respond, he would open his mouth to answer, but close it again, confused and unsure of what to say. Lois let him take his time.

"I think..." Jason said carefully, his voice hardly above a whisper. He spoke very seriously, and almost frightfully with his answer, "I think it's Daddy."

Her jaw tightened, her heart began to skyrocket, and questions soared through her mind. Was Richard nearby?

_Why was he angry? Why was he speaking to someone about photographs? What should I do? Should I stay here? Should I take Jason and leave now?_

She was determined not to worry Jason. She gave him a cool, steady reaction and said slowly, "Are you sure?"

Jason nodded, "Yes. It's daddy."

"Does it sound like he might be close?"

"I don't...think so. He's talking about where you worked before. The_ Daily Planet_."

_Is he in Metropolis? Is he looking for us?  
_

"Mommy!" Jason suddenly drew in a sharp breath, "I can hear auntie Chloe!"

* * *

"You're an idiot. You know that, right?" Chloe Sullivan tightened her grip on Jimmy's hand.

"You shouldn't have let me talk you into going into that alley. Not alone." Chloe stroked his hand softly. A small smile formed across her lips. She couldn't help but enjoy being in Jimmy's company again. She hadn't seen him a few years, but she still felt like she knew him better than anyone.

In her left hand, she crumpled the tatty, wrinkled letter that Jimmy had received in the mail, instructing him to go to the alley.

When Jimmy had contacted her again warning her about the photograph of herself, and the others, it became intriguing to her. She was, after all, one of the most prestigious reporters at the _Gotham Gazette_.Now taking a job at the _Daily Planet_, Chloe was more than eager to start her first story.

"We need to find out who's behind this, Jimmy." She explained to him breathlessly. "This will make a fantastic story."

"Wait," Jimmy had brought her back down to earth, "You're not actually considering...printing the photos."

"No! No, not Superman!" Chloe reassured him quickly. "_You_, Jimmy. You're the story. You're being stalked and sent creepy photographs, blackmailing you into betraying your closest friend." A broad grin spread across her face. "What could be more exciting than that?"

"I let my enthusiasm get the better of me, Jimmy. I'm sorry." Chloe's gaze traveled from her firm clasp on his hand and up toward his peaceful expression, while he slept contently in his dreams. Her smile grew bigger as she let her fingers gently flow through his brilliant, blaze of red hair.

Chloe couldn't help but let the blame for Jimmy's injury rest on her shoulders. She had insisted that he go to the alley, and try to find out more about what was going on. Jimmy was _supposed _to phone her as soon as it was over. He never did. She decided to casually drive by the alleyway to check up on him, and that's when she saw his cold, limp body lying in his own puddle of blood.

Chloe felt a violent vibration shake inside her pocket, jolting her back into the present. She gathered herself together quickly. Wiping her eyes and stepping out into the florescent hospital hallway, she flipped open her cell phone.

"Hello, Chloe Sullivan."

"_Chloe, it__'__s me, Lois_."

"Hey, Lo-"

"_Where are you, Chloe? Is Richard around? Are you okay?_"

Chloe blinked. "Uh, I-I'm at the hospital. I haven't seen Richard." She heard her cousin's heavy breaths on the other end of the line, "Are you alright, Lois?"

"_Why are you at the hospital_?"

Chloe began to pace back and forth nervously along the hallway. Lois's frantic tone was alarming enough to put a knot in her stomach. "I'm here with Jimmy Olsen." She answered, brushing her dirty blond hair out of her eyes.

Her cousin was silent for a few seconds before replying, "_Why is Jimmy in the hospital?_"

Chloe bit down on the bottom of her lip thoughtfully, "It's a long story. He was stabbed on the way home from work, but he should be okay."

When Lois didn't reply Chloe became anxious, peeking cautiously around the corner of the hallway before going around, "What's wrong, Lois?"

Chloe heard her cousin breath a long, weary sigh, "_Just call if you see Richard, alright? Don__'__t talk to him. Just call me.__"_

"What's this abou-"

Chloe was cut off by the irritating drone of the dead line. She stared at her phone, muddled and confused about Lois's unusual behaviour. She could only shrug it off for now. She decided that when Jimmy came around, she would ask him more about it later.

Chloe was eager to get back to Jimmy's side, when she felt a light tap on her shoulder. Her slight case of paranoia caused her to jump.

"Chloe," At the sound of her name, she began turned around slowly.

"Clark?"

* * *

"I can't believe that I didn't hear him." Clark gawked, open mouthed, at his best friend lying unconscious in the next room.

"It's not your fault." Chloe assured him while taking her seat back beside his bed.

"But it's..." Clark could hardly grasp the idea of Jimmy getting so violently attacked. "It's _Jimmy_."

He was the last person Clark would have expected to get involved with his enemies.

"Yeah well, Jimmy was the one who was foolish enough to keep this from you." Chloe fumbled around insider her purse until she came to the crinkled, manila envelope with a large crease down the middle. "He found these in his mailbox. I don't think the photo of me is particularly flattering at all."

She handed the envelope to Clark, who only took a few seconds to inspect the contents with his specialized vision, before his felt his heart jump into his throat.

"He was being blackmailed." She informed with an uneasy tone, "But I know that he would easily give up his life, rather than betray you." Chloe sat perfectly still, hands folded and her voice speaking only as faint as an echo. "Jimmy knows your secret, Clark."

* * *

**Again, please let me know I stil have my wonderful readers. Leave a review? Many more chapters to come:)**


	27. Therapeutic talk

**Thanks to Lilly my beta!**

**Thanks to everyone who left a review, you guys gave me a new burst of inspiration:)**

* * *

**Chapter 27: Therapeutic talk**

"You have more clothes than Paris Hilton." Lois rolled her eyes as she folded _another _lime green tank top and carelessly stuffed it into a dark brown cardboard box.

"I like having options when I get dressed." Chloe retorted in her defense. With a sly grin, she scanned Lois disdainfully, "It wouldn't kill you to take a trip to the mall once in awhile either."

Lois tossed her another one of Chloe's silky, bright purple pairs of underwear. "You know, when you asked me to help you pack up your apartment, I didn't know it was because you were moving to Metropolis to take _my_ job."

"I did not know that it was your job when I applied. I thought it would be fun; you and I would be working together again. Just like old times." Chloe carefully wrapped up a golden, embroidered plate from her china cabinet, in endless layers of bubble-wrap. "Besides, you never told me that you moved to Gotham and have practically been living down the street from me for the past four months."

"That's because it was on a need-to-know basis. You didn't need to know." Lois unscrewed the lid from a thick, black marker and scribbled _Chloe's collection of bad style_, on the outside of the box that contained her clothing.

"Oh, that's right. I'm just, you know, you're closest cousin who is practically your sister. Why would I need to know anything about your life when I can just pick up a newspaper, flip to the gossip column and find your name in big bold print and read all about your latest act of _desperation _to be with Big Blue?"

Lois's lip curled when Chloe put so much emphasis on _desperation_. "You just won't let that go will you, Chloe?"

"Let what go?" Chloe ripped off a piece of wide, dark packing tape with her teeth.

"Oh, you know, _I Spent the Night with Superman._" The words from her headline practically burned her mouth as they tumbled out of Lois's lips. "You're just jealous that I scooped you first."

"Oh, please." Chloe flipped her hair back with confidence, "Trust me, Lois. When it comes to Superman, I scooped you a _long _time ago."

Normally, Lois wouldn't let her cousin's words get the better of her. But there was a smug hint of self-satisfied pleasure in her voice that Lois simply could not ignore. "What is that supposed to mean?"

She expected Chloe to shrug it off, with nothing better to say, while Lois muddled through her endless piles of clothing.

"It means," Chloe began deviously, "That I already covered the whole Super-scene way back in high school."

Lois's brow furrowed curiously at Chloe's arrogant little smile. _Is she playing mind games with me?_

"Okay," She said coolly, pinning one of Chloe's blue blouses to herself in the mirror. "So do tell, how have you managed to scoop me?"

"By going to high school with him." Chloe replied casually; placing another bubble-wrapped tea cup in the box. She didn't look at Lois, she didn't even blink.

_On the other hand..._Lois considered. _Chloe grew up in Smallville, like Clark..._

Chloe finally did look up at Lois, with a wicked grin smiling back at her.

_Does she..._

Lois felt her heart pounding hard in her chest, a twist of anxious dread twirling around in her stomach.

_She can't know. She can't. How...why?_

"Who is Superman?" Lois spat bluntly, trying to get the truth out in open.

Her cousin tilted her head, "I think you want to rephrase that question." She said without hesitation. "I think you meant to ask, who is Clark Kent."

Lois felt the color drain away from her face. An instant ripple of hurt traveled throughout her veins.

"_You._" Lois whispered pathetically, "He told _you?_"

Chloe's smug little grin faded away quickly when she saw her cousin's pained expression. "He didn't _tell _me. I found out on my own, when he threw a car like a beach ball."

Lois, stunned at the fact that her cousin would keep such a vital piece of information from her for all these years, was remarkably lost for words. "And...and...you...have known? A-all this time?" She stuttered.

Chloe shifted uncomfortably, "Well...yeah."

"_You!_" Lois suddenly flared, tossing her blouse on the carpet. "He has _no _problem with trusting his high school sweetheart with all his lovely secrets! But when it comes to the mother of his child, forget it!"

"You-- wait what?"

"I can't believe him! Just when I think he can stoop no lower!"

"You mean...Jason is...?"

"Yeah! His kid! Surprised?" Lois raged on. "I sure as heck was!"

Chloe blinked, "Wow. That is..._wow_."

"Who else can he possibly tell!?"

"Actually, Jimmy-"

"Oh, God!" Lois marched back and forth, tromping all over Chloe's clothes. "Why doesn't he just announce it to the entire world!?"

"To clarify one thing," Chloe added quietly, "I was not his high school sweetheart." She tilted her head, searching through her memories, "But Clark did take me to prom-"

"I can't believe you didn't tell me!" Chloe winced as Lois stomped on her designer, two hundred dollar jacket. "You're my cousin! We were so close back than, why didn't you tell me?"

"To be honest," Chloe began bravely. "It wasn't really any of my business who he chose to tell."

"You're a reporter! It's your job to reveal all of the skeletons hidden in the closet!"

"Don't blame me, Lois. I am not the bad guy here."

"How can I know that? How do I know your not here on his behalf? I haven't seen or talked to you in almost two years, Chloe!"

"Hey, that is not true. I came to Lucy's funeral-" She bit down on her tongue, regretting the words instantly when she saw Lois's face fall. Lois seemed to let go of all of her anger at the sound of her sister's name. She stopped pacing, and let her arms fall gently to her sides. She stared back at Chloe, her eyes shinning with grief.

"I'm sorry," Chloe rushed to Lois's side, a pit of guilt welling up in her stomach. "I shouldn't have...brought her into this."

Lois shook her head but didn't say anything.

"Look," Chloe took Lois by the arm and lead her toward the plastic preserved couch. Her body was tense and stiff, and giving Chloe a cold stare she reluctantly sat down.

"I'm on your side, Lois. Clark keeping this secret from you, especially since Jason's birth, was wrong." Chloe's voice was low and steady. Lois's muscles began to relax. It was just Chloe after all. They had been close for years, but they let they're careers and life get ahead of them.

_Of course I can trust her. She's my cousin._

"_But_," Chloe added, her eyes shifted to Lois's stubborn expression. "If Clark had good intentions, which he did, you should be able to forgive him. He wanted nothing more than to protect you and Jason. He didn't do this to hurt you." Chloe's harsh words took a few silent moments to sink in. These were the same words Lois had been debating with herself for the past few months. To finally hear it coming from someone else was like a blow of reality smashing over her head.

When Lois didn't respond Chloe continued, "When I first found out about Clark, I didn't tell anyone. I kept it to myself for almost a year. Suddenly, everything made sense. His quick exits, and his lame excuses. Sure, I was a little offended that he didn't trust me enough to tell me. But I understood that he had his reasons. Over time, more and more people were sent to Summer Hold, because they knew Clark's secret and they couldn't cope."

"Summer Hold..." Lois uttered the familiar name of the establishment. "That's the mental institution. That's where your mother-"

"Yeah," Chloe cut her off sharply, "The point is, that the year I spent trying to hide Clark's secret, was the worst year of my life." Chloe paused when Lois peeked her head up with interest. "I had to be _so _careful all the time. I had no one to share it with; I had to carry it by myself. I had never felt so alone in my entire life."

Lois stared hard at her cousin, who continued to make her point, "So, if I couldn't even keep his secret alone for one year, it really makes me wonder how he can do it every single day." Chloe's fingers began to fiddle with the bubble-wrap, popping it thoughtfully she concluded, "He is probably the loneliest man on the entire planet."

Lois said nothing. There wasn't anything she could say. Chloe was right. But how could she force herself to put all those feelings of hate and anger toward him at the back of her mind? She couldn't just simply forget everything he had put her through.

"But...that's his choice, Chloe. Just like...when he _chose_ to leave. He's choosing to do this to himself. I didn't choose to hurt him-"

"No," Chloe sighed, "But you did choose to leave him."

Lois swallowed hard. Chloe was saying all the things that she didn't want to hear. A sharp pang hit her heart."But... it hurt so much when he left." Lois tried to stifle a small sob from escaping. "Why should I be the one suffer?"

"You don't have to, not anymore. And he shouldn't either. When he told me you that knew about his secret, do you know where I ran into him?" Chloe squeezed Lois's arm with a sense of comfort. "At the hospital. He's practically been spending all of his time there. Clark's mother has broken arm and collar bone." Chloe paused, "Ben Hubbard, a close friend of his family, is also in the hospital and has taken a turn for the worst. Clark's house is _gone_. His childhood home collapsed into a pile of rubble. His best friend..." Chloe nearly chocked on her words when she spoke his name, "Jimmy, is...well, he lost a lot of blood that night. And he hasn't woken up yet..."Her voice seemed to trail off as she recalled seeing Jimmy lying so peacefully. "And you left him. You took Jason and _left_. He misses you more than you can imagine, Lois. He's got nothing else to hold on to."

Lois's left hand clenched firmly into a tight fist. She knew Clark never deserved all that pain. Yes, she was furious about his lies, his choice to leave, his choice to steal her memories, but Lois would never wish all that pain upon him.

"If you ask me," Chloe exhaled softly, "Clark has suffered more than enough for the both of you. And it's not fair to punish Jason either. He deserves to see his...f-father." Chloe stuttered, still trying to wrap her mind around the fact that Clark had a child. "I think you should talk to Clark."

Lois sat in silence for a moment. She knew that she couldn't avoid Clark forever. And she knew how much she was hurting Jason. It wasn't fair.

She turned her head to see a playful grin tugging at the corner of Chloe's lips, "Now if you don't agree that he has suffered enough, than you go dig up the Kryptonite, and I'll hold him down."

Lois shot back an amused smile, "Way to go all Dr. Phil on me, Chloe."

"Oh, trust me if you were talking to Dr. Phil, he would be giving you hell right now." Chloe stood up from the couch and dug through her purse, "Besides, you _needed _that therapeutic talk." She finally revealed two narrow strips of paper. "I got you these." She said handing them to Lois. "They're tickets."

Lois raised her eyebrow curiously, "Tickets to see Dr. Phil?"

"No," Chloe rolled her eyes, "They're two train tickets to Metropolis. You and Jason, are going home."

* * *

**Good old Chloe was finally able to talk some sense into Lois. Leave a review?**

**Next chapter coming soon.**


	28. Surprise

**I had **_**SO **_**much fun writing this chapter. I really hope you all like it. Thanks for the feedback on the last chapter. I would really appreciate it if you would leave a review especially on this chapter because I worked particularly hard on it. And you can look forward to the next one after this, because I think you'll like it even more :)**

**Thanks for the beta Lilly! (By the way, Lilly could always use some help. Anyone else want to beta for awhile?)  
**

* * *

**_Chapter 28: Surprise_ **

"Mommy, which toy should I bring to show Mr. Clark? My model train or my ninja action figure?"

Jason held up both toys to Lois's face, his mind debating carefully which special toy out of the collection he should pack for Metropolis.

"Whichever one you want to bring is fine, sweetheart." Lois replied slightly distracted, tending to her overstuffed little, black suitcase in the corner. _Two days..._She assured herself confidently. _Three days maximum. I go in, I talk to Clark, and I get out. Maybe even pay Jimmy a little visit in the hospital. It's easy._ She nodded slowly, trying to convince herself that speaking with Clark was the right thing to do._I have to do it for Jason. We'll arrange some sort of agreement so that Jason can see Clark more often. Maybe he can come pick him on weekends or something..._

It had taken Chloe nearly a full hour to persuade Lois to take the train tickets back to Metropolis.  
"I paid for these tickets, and they are non-refundable! You are_ going_ to Metropolis! You are _going_ to talk to Clark! And you are _going_ to fix your life, weather you like it or not!" Chloe could be very persuasive when she was angry.

Lois knew she was doing the right thing, but she couldn't help the nervous butterflies that flew around in her stomach. What would he say? Would he want to speak with her? Would he be glad to see them again?

_Of course he will. It's just Clark after all. _But that was the thought that made Lois queasy. He wasn't just Clark anymore. He was that tall, dark, handsome and charming pillar of strength that she had fallen head-over-heels in love with. He wasn't just that the goofy, bumbling idiot that she could always count on for a laugh anymore. He was her knight in shining armor. He was Superman now. The Clark that she had always known and trusted, was now gone.

Jason gave her a solemn frown, as if she wasn't being much help. "I think Mr. Clark would like to see the train." While Lois was trembling on the edge of an anxiety attack, Jason was quite the opposite.

The moment Lois told Jason that they were going to visit Clark, Jason's face lit up with pure delight. He was excited and thrilled to be heading back to Metropolis.

"Mommy, how come we don't just call him?"

"I don't have his number anymore." Lois replied dryly. It was one of those useless items that had ended up in the trash because of her temper. She honestly didn't think she would need it anymore.

"No, Mommy I mean _call_ for him. I bet he would hear you. He could fly here really fast and we wouldn't have to go on a silly, old train."

Lois packed her toothbrush in the side pocket of her suitcase and zippered it up tight, "I thought it would be nice if we made it a surprise."

"Surprise, Mr. Clark? Yeah!" He immediately loved the idea. "He'll be so happy to see us again!" Jason clapped his hands together eagerly, "Maybe he'll even take us flying!"

Lois smirked a cunning little grin. _Yes, I want to surprise him. I want to catch him off guard. I want him to know that I have the upper hand. He needs to understand that it was my decision to speak with him on my own terms, and when I decided I was ready._

Jason, now overwhelmed with glee, bounded out of the door in search of his favourite toys to show Clark. But not before spinning around at Lois and giving her a hard stare, "Mommy," He began slowly, "I know Mr. Clark told you a bad lie. I know it made you sad. But he said he was sorry, are you going to forgive him now? Is that why we're going to visit him?"

Lois blinked and inhaled a long, uncertain breath, gazing straight back into her son's eyes truthfully she replied, "We'll see." It was the best and most honest answer she could give. And Jason seemed to accept the answer happily with a brief nod of his head. For in the world of children, the phrase _we'll see,_ was always code for a most definite _yes._

* * *

The sun dipped below the clouds as Clark drifted gently over the soft, pastel colors of the sunset. He gazed down below at the most famous, leaning, freestanding tower of Pisa in Italy. The tourists below swarmed together at the base of the tower and pointed enthusiastically at his dark, maroon cape fluttering in the breeze around him. He waved politely at the cheering and whistling crowed before taking his dramatic leave, and whizzing off again in the blazing rays of the sinking celestial sun. 

The Cathedral next to the tower had caught on fire due to a careless cigarette left on the front lawn. After he had made quick work of the blaze with his breath, he gave his little spiel to the crowed about the importance of discarding cigarettes with care, in Italian. Then of course he quickly reminded them that it wasn't healthy to pick up the habit in the first place.

Now, Clark drew in a well deserved, relaxing breath of fresh air as he took in the beautiful scenery of Italy.

He hadn't had a moments rest in weeks. Any spare moment of free time was chewed away by his job and his pathetic, half-hearted articles the Perry had been more than disappointed with. Then there were his daily hospital rounds, visiting his mother, Ben Hubbard and Jimmy. The icing on the cake was that there had been sudden rush of disasters this week, giving him little time for sleep when the desperate cries of the world called for his aid again.

And then of course, there was the dark, empty hole in his heart that he simply could not fill no matter how many fires he extinguished, no matter how many crooks he arrested and no matter how many headlines he had, nothing could fill that hollow space of loneliness. He did his very best to keep his mind side tracked with his duties for Perry and for the rest of the world. But distracting himself with minuscule tasks for the day could never make him forget that dark and hateful look that still haunted him. He would never forget the hurt and anger that swelled up into Lois's eyes when he tried to visit Jason on his birthday.

_I do want you to be a part of his life...but not yet._

Those few words from Lois that day were the only shreds of hope he had left to hold on to. That perhaps one day she would open her heart again and be able to forgive him. Perhaps one day he would be able to have a semi-normal relationship with his son. But these dreams were like fairy tales to him, and beyond his reach. All he could do was be patient and wait.

* * *

Jason squirmed impatiently in his seat. "Are we there yet?" He asked for about the tenth time since the train left the station, exactly forty-two minutes ago, by the look of her watch. 

Lois tore her gaze away from the window with the millions of bright, yellow lights from the city buzzing by.

She smiled tolerantly. She was glad that Jason was so excited. She wished she could have been so enthusiastic. The butterflies of worry flew faster in her stomach. She was fidgety and couldn't seem to keep calm. The more she thought about seeing Clark, the more upset she became. There was a tingling feeling of dread that shivered down her spine. Her mind was focused on what she should say. Should she apologize? Her pride probably wouldn't allow it. But how do you break the ice with the father of your child, who you tried to cut out of your life forever?

She had been lost in the mist of thought for most of the journey on the train. It had been a relatively peaceful ride, besides Jason's constant badgering, and the endless tapping of her nervous foot.

"No, not yet Jason."

She couldn't help but feel the least bit sorry for Clark. He had been completely alone for five long years.

_I don't think I could do that._ _I couldn't handle becoming so isolated from everyone for so long._

She shook her head, knowing that it was his foolish decision to leave in the first place. _I could never choose to leave_. _It would be too hard. _And then the thought stuck her, _It must have been terribly difficult for him to leave._ A tinge of sympathy for him ached from her heart. _He risked everything by leaving. He put all of his hopes on finding something still alive from Krypton. From his home. _Lois leaned her head up against the window. _He went all that way and lost those five years, and for what? For nothing. He found nothing but a graveyard._

She knew that must have hurt more than she could ever possibly imagine. She couldn't bear to think of his disappointment. It was then that she realized how much Clark really had suffered. _I sure didn't make it any easier for him when he came back. I suppose he might not have deserved _everything_ that I did._

Jason laid back into his seat and sighed, "It smells funny on this train. I don't like it. And it's boring." He complained restlessly, "How much longer until we get to Mr. Clark's?"

"I'm don't know-"

Lois's sentence was cut short when she was jolted back in her seat. She felt an enormous amount of pressure slam down on her chest. She instinctively reached over to Jason's seat and grabbed his hand. She heard an ear-pricing screech from the train as she was thrown forward again. The lights flickered out, and Jason's panicked cries rose above the others.

"Mommy! Mommy, help! It's dark!"

Before Lois could respond, the train echoed again with screams when she was jerked to the side. She squeezed her eyes tight shut when she heard the dreadful shattering of glass, bracing herself for the razor sharp shards that flew into her face. Her body was twisted to the side, when she and the rest of the passengers were flipped off of the tracks and scraped along the ground. Lois gripped the seat ahead of her, while her other hand was glued to Jason's tiny fingers. "Mommy!" Jason's cries broke her heart. Everything was happening too fast. She couldn't breath. There was a large chunk of crushed metal pinning her helplessly to her seat. She couldn't see anything that was going on. The darkness was blinding and the screaming grew loader.

_Oh God, _Lois gasped for air. She felt the spiral shape of metal starting to sink into her stomach, _Jason._

His tiny grip had slipped from her fingers. She turned her head looking for the faint outline of her son. The splinters of glass had settled deep into her cheeks as she was pressed up against the remains of the broken window.

"Fire!" A terrified voice hollered out from the pitch black chaos. "Fire! Get out!"

"Help..." Lois could hardly breathe in enough air for a whisper. "Jason..." She called for him breathlessly.

She could see it at the corner of her eye. The vibrant orange and red flames seethed closer to where she was trapped. She moaned weakly, using all of what was left of her energy to try and lift up the large chunk of debris that restrained her to the seat. It didn't move, but she cried out in agony as it fell back down into her flesh.

_I can't go out like this, _She reminded herself with a spark of determination lighting up in her chest. _I didn't get to tell him. _She wheezed faintly with another moan of pain,_ I didn't get to tell Clark that I was sorry._

* * *

"What is it, Clark?" Martha frowned with concern when Clark put down the book that he had been reading out loud while she lie bedridden with a solid white cast wrapped firmly around her arm. Clark wasn't with her anymore, at least his thoughts weren't. They were off somewhere distant, wherever his ears would take him. She could identify that far-off, foggy look with pride, knowing that he was about to take his leave and save another soul from their gloomy fate. 

"Train crash," Clark replied darkly, "A big one."

Martha waved him off with her good left arm, "Then what are you waiting for?"

Clark stood up from his chair and gestured to the book, "I'll finish it later," Martha nodded her head quickly at his apologetic expression, "Go!"

* * *

Clark hurried through the clouds towards the outskirts of Metropolis where his hearing was focused on the pandemonium coming from the passengers. The train had toppled over off the tracks and was now laying upside-down as a blazing inferno. The bright orange flames licked the sides of the silver metal tracks. There was thick, black smoke rushing out of the broken glass windows. A team of three fire trucks raced to the scene while two ambulances followed close behind. 

Clark cringed as he focused his acute hearing towards the disaster. There were so many people trapped in the boxcars. Some were praying, some were crying, some took in their last breaths as they were either engulfed in the flames or crushed under large chunks of metal from the collapsing boxcars.

He was too _late. _He didn't waste another second. He immediately filled his lungs with the crisp night air, and exhaled powerfully as he glided just overhead of the train. His frosty breath vanquished the flames and began to clear away the smoke. He landed swiftly on the ground where he met the Metropolis fire-chief, monitoring the situation and shouting out orders at the others.

"How many passengers?" Clark spoke hurriedly.

"One hundred and twelve." He reported grimly, "My team has already pulled out three. A few have made it out on their own. But it's not looking good."

Clark nodded his head before dashing off in a blur of speed towards the train. The front two boxcars had remained on the tracks, but the people were in a panicked frenzy from the fire and shock. Clark yanked off the metal door at both ends and escorted them swiftly off the train and into the care of the paramedics.

He then rushed to attend to the other boxcars that were flipped upside-down. He ripped off the doors with ease, but with a dreaded feeling of disappointment settling in his stomach, he saw that most of the people were trapped under the twisted collapsing metal. Of course it would be simple enough to remove all of the debris with one swift gesture, but the people were tangled up in the mess. He would have to take extra care when removing pieces to be sure of not accidentally hurting the passengers. And this would take time, which was a luxury he knew he didn't have from the frantic cries in the other cars.

The other paramedics fallowed close behind Clark has he attempted to rescue every single passenger crushed beneath the rubble...

* * *

"Is that everyone?" Clark spoke quickly to one of the weary paramedics attending one of victims that appeared to have a broken leg. The other team of paramedics carried what seemed to appear as every passenger in the last boxcar out on a stretcher. Clark had worked as quickly and as carefully as he could. But he couldn't help but feel guilty about the elderly couple that had died from their severe injuries. 

"All except for a woman trapped near the back. None of us can get to her, I don't she would make it anyway."

"I'll go-"

"Superman!"

The paramedic went back to his duties as Clark turned around to the little cry of despair from behind him.

_Jason,_ His breath was taken away when he saw his son standing feebly amongst the scrambling people around him. Tears poured down his cheeks. He was frightened and shaking. Clark was amazed when he looked around at all of the victims, almost everyone was injured quite seriously, but his tiny little son didn't even have a scratch on him. Clark wanted nothing more than scoop Jason up into his arms and sob with relief. But he knew he could never risk being so familiar with the child in public.

"Jason," Clark bent down to Jason's height and placed his hand warmly on his shoulder. He was the last person Clark would have expected to see here. "What are you doing-?"

"Superman, the firemen took me out of the train," Jason rushed, "But they couldn't get to Mommy! Please Superman you've got to save Mommy!" Jason pleaded desperately, his eyes drowning in terrified tears.

Clark felt his heart race into overdrive with alarm. He didn't dare waste another second and walked Jason over to the care of one of the paramedics.

"You stay here," He warned Jason firmly. "Do not move until I come back to get you, alright?"

Jason nodded obediently and sniffed, "Hurry."

* * *

When Clark franticly struggled through the debris in the last boxcar, the first thing he came to was a lifeless limb. Lois's foot was the only part of her body that wasn't buried underneath layers of rubble. 

Clark's heart jumped into his throat when he saw her. "Lois!" He cried hysterically, "Lois!"

_Why didn't I hear her? Why didn't I come to her first? Why was she on the train? _ _Was she...was she coming back?_

He continued to dig through the wreckage, finally there was only one shred of metal that remained pinning her to the ground.

"Oh, Lois..." His knees gave way at the sight of her mangled body. He was thankful that she was still conscious. She took in long, raspy breaths. Her eyes fluttered open as Clark ran his fingers across the cuts on her face.

"Clark," Lois moaned feebly, no louder than a hushed whisper. "You're here..." She trailed off, choking on her words.

"Shh," Clark's heart ached when he was how deep the large chunk of debris had sunk down into her stomach. "I want you to save your strength. I'm going to get you out of here, okay?"

Lois didn't respond, her eyes drooping closed as her breaths became weaker.

"L-Lois," Clark stuttered, taking her cold, limp hand into his own. "I need you to stay awake, alright? Do not fall asleep." Clark wrapped his hand around the piece of metal, "Lois, I'm sorry. This is going to hurt a little bit..." He hardly moved the hunk of debris half an inch out of her stomach before she shouted out in pain. It stung his heart to listen to her screams.

"Clark, it hurts..."

"I know, but I've got to get it out so I can get you to the hospital. I promise it will all be over in a few minutes, okay?"

Clark could see a slow nod of her head. Her left hand squeezed his tightly, bracing herself for the pain.

"Clark, I'm sorry. For everything..."

He shook his head, "You have nothing to be sorry for." He assured her quickly, "I need you to be strong for me now, Lois. And for Jason."

"Okay," She answered shakily.

Clark concentrated carefully on the depth of the metal. He could rip it out in one clean swipe, but he would have to be especially careful not to cause anymore damage to her wound.

"Ready?"

Lois nodded, coughing up a spew of blood in her mouth. She couldn't wait any longer. It was now or never.

Clark removed the chunk of metal from her stomach in a swift but cautious gesture. Her screaming was almost unbearable

"Lois!" He took her bloody body into his arms. "It's over, it's okay! You're safe now."

* * *

It was just as Clark had expected. Lois's internal bleeding wounds were serious. 

"Is Mommy going to be okay, Mr. Clark?"

Clark peered straight through his glasses staring gravely at his son's concerned expression.

"I..." Clark opened his mouth to respond. Jason deserved the truth. No more lies. "I don't know, Jason."

They had been sitting patiently in the hospital waiting room for hours. Jason had said almost nothing since arriving. He didn't need to. Clark could tell how worried he was about his mother by his silence. He didn't fidget, he didn't complain, he just sat quietly gazing straight ahead at the operating room Lois had been rushed into hours before.

"I think..." Jason finally uttered, "I think it's my fault." He ended his thought with a long trembling sigh.

"What?" Clark collected the sobbing little boy into his lap. "What do you mean?"

"It's my fault Mommy is hurt! I wanted to come see you! I was bad! I whined and complained for her to take me to see you. So she tried to make me happy, and now she's hurt!"

"Oh, Jason." Clark rubbed his arm soothingly around his back. "Look at me." He instructed sternly, gazing straight into his son's tearful eyes. "It is _not _your fault for what happened to your mother." Clark was determined to raise Jason right. He wanted to make sure that Jason did not grow up blaming himself for everything that went wrong. It wasn't fair to him.  
"What happened on the train was an accident." He added softly. "You had nothing to do with her getting hurt."

Jason sniffed, clinging tightly around Clark's neck. "I'm sorry, Mr. Clark. It was supposed to be a surprise...for you."

* * *

**So, what do you think? Plleease leave a review! I would very much love to hear what you all think of this chapter! I promise that if you didn't like this one that you will love the next :)**


	29. Waking up

**Sorry to keep you all waiting for so long.**

**I've also been writing a one-shot that is supposed to be like a mini-series for this fic. It is supposed to occur between chapters 14-15. It is focused on Lois's rape. So if you're interested in finding out some more background info on the incident, you may want to check it out. I'll give you a quick summary here...**

_**Lois's secret, tragic past is finally catching up with her. Just after Superman left, she was raped. Now she's having strange nightmares about it. A woman has gone missing and it's up to Lois and Clark to find her. But Lois will have to pay the price when she encounters her rapist again...**_

**So I hope you will go read it since is considered part of this fic. You can find it on my user profile. Anyway, enjoy this chapter. PLEASE, leave a review! I miss reading all of your reviews SO much.**

**Thanks so much for the beta Lilly! **

* * *

**Chapter 29: Waking up****  
**  
There was nothing but darkness. Nothing, but the endless pitch black tunnel lay ahead of her. A splinter of fear touched her heart. She drifted softly into the cold, desolate waves of darkness. It wasn't painful, exactly, but it was almost dead. Everything seemed so lifeless, so isolated, so lost. There was nothing but fear. No happiness, no sadness, just fear. It was like drowning, suffocating, using all her strength to struggle to the surface toward the light. Only there was no surface to burst through, because there was no light, only more darkness. She was trapped in her own ocean of terror. She couldn't even scream. She couldn't make a sound. There was an aura of eerie silence that thrived in this numb realm of darkness. Her desperate cries for salvation were drowned out by the waves. She had lost complete control in her body. She could only drift powerlessly through the thrashing waves. She tumbled and churned helplessly through the aggressive current. 

_Why am I here?_ Thoughts of confusion flowed through her mind as she gave up her feeble fight against the darkness. It had defeated her; she could only pray slightly that she would be rescued from the frozen hands of the dark.

_The train..._She recalled weakly, her memories nothing more than a swirling disaster in her mind. _I saw him. He saved me from the train...did I...did I die? _Fear's icy, threatening grasp around her heart squeezed harder. A stream of shock and alarm traveled through her. _No. I can't die. Not after everything...I can't be dead. I can't leave Jason. _

The chilling grip was crushing her heart. _What do I do?!_ She wanted to scream. _This can't be it. This can't be the end. _

She suddenly became vaguely aware of a faint source of warmth. The source was somewhere far off in the distance, the warmth focused directly where her right hand should be. Every few seconds the warmth grew stronger.

_What is that? _Lois strained to reach closer to the patch heat. _It's so soft..._ She could sense that the source was not with her. It wasn't trapped in the domain of engulfing darkness like she was. But then where was it coming from? Lois almost seemed to grab onto the soft spot of warmth like a fishing line. She refused to let go. Whatever it was, it was safe.

_"I don't know if you can hear me..."_

A startling sense of alarm snatched her attention away from soft blow of heat massaging her body.

_What was that? A voice? Here? _

It was such a faint whisper she could hardly make out the words. She concentrated every single ounce of energy into searching for the soft murmur echoing throughout the dark.

"_They say that sometimes when people are..."_ The voice trailed off, Lois was lost for thought. It was so tender and so kind; where was it coming from? She frantically squirmed and twisted in every direction, desperate for a sign from the voice again._"...that they can hear you."_

_It's him! _Lois wanted to shout. _Clark, I'm here! _

He was there. He was the warmth. His gentle voice was filled with affection, and a tinge of grief. _Clark, please help me! _She knew that he would never hear her cries. But he was nearby, and that was more than enough to ignite a new spark of determination within her heart.

"_I know that when I was..." _He seemed to choke on his words, _"I heard you, Lois. I heard your voice, I felt your touch...you brought me out of the darkness."_

Lois could easily recall the day that he fell from the sky. The image of his peaceful yet lifeless face, burned in her brain still haunted her thoughts. She would never forget it. And she wouldn't forget the pain that she felt, knowing that there was the possibility that he would never hear her, and that he would never wake up.

_Is that where I am? Am I...in the hospital? _Never had she been so absorbed by the darkness of unconsciousness. Never could she recall falling so close to death.

_Clark, _She begged silently, _How do I wake up? Please help me._

"_I know you're in there, Lois. And...you can hear me. I-I know you can..."_ She could hear the hurt in the voice, and it was chipping away at her heart. _"It's been three days since the train accident. It's time to wake up, Lois. I-I know that you...are probably sill upset with me. But if you won't do it for me, please do it for Jason. He's terribly worried about you." _She heard Clark pause, as if he was gathering up the strength to speak, _"Please wake up, Lois."_

His voice was becoming louder. The soft touch of his hand grew warmer. Lois felt her heart nearly explode with relief when she saw a faint pinhole of light beginning to form up ahead of her. As she struggled to move forward against the current of darkness, the light grew larger and more powerful. It fought away the foggy haze of the dark until Lois found herself staring straight ahead into a mist of shapes and figures.

_I'm almost out! _She wanted to yell with delight, desperately trying to focus her smear of outlined figures into solid images. _Where are you, Clark?_

When the numbing sensation throughout her body finally seemed to fade away, Lois slowly tilted her head and rested her hazy gaze on the outline of a figure sitting hunched over at her side. She blinked a few times, the blurry blend of color beginning to morph back into solid objects. Her throat tightened, as the figure's features became clearer into focus. It was him, unmistakable. His rich, dark hair was combed neatly to the side and his head was tipped downward, studying her hand hopefully. Lois squinted, the bright florescent light from the ceiling beaming down into her sensitive eyelids.

"I know that I've caused you a lot of pain. And I'm sorry for that. I should have told you everything a long time ago." Clark went on, as Lois took a moment to take in her surroundings. The first thing she noticed was a plastic respiratory mask set awkwardly overtop of her mouth and nose. She was tempted to remove it from her face, but the pain in the right side of her wrist drew her attention to the white and gray material wrapped tightly around her arm. Other than the dark purple and blue bruises and the deep red gashes scattered amongst her flesh, her body _seemed _like it was in relatively good condition, considering what it was put through.

"But that's not really what your angry at, is it?" Clark mused, his gaze still concentrated bleakly on her motionless hand. He chuckled half heartedly, "You know, I think you knew about me even before I took the paternity test. I think you've known for awhile. It's been buried in your subconscious, but I think...you knew in your heart who I was. I think deep down, you never really forgot."

Lois blinked, taking a moment to let his thoughts sink into her. _I knew? I didn't have a clue! I..._She stopped when Clark's grip tightened slightly on her own. _Forgot? That's right. I did know...but he...he took my memories. _A sharp prickle of anger swelled up in her heart. _What else did he take from me?_

"And I'm sorry that I've caused you so much pain, Lois." Clark spoke softly, as if reading her thoughts. "That was not my intention." Lois swallowed hard. She could tell by the tone of his deep and weary voice that he was completely sincere

_You should be able to forgive him. He wanted nothing more than to protect you and Jason. He didn't do this to hurt you. _Chloe's words floated to the top of her mind._Clark has suffered more than enough for the both of you._

"But I think..." Clark pressed on, "You're really angry at me because...I left."

_Bingo._ Lois thought bleakly.

"I can sit here and apologize a hundred times, but that will never make up for the time that I've lost. And how much I hurt you."

Her body was so weak, and felt exhausted from the pain. But Clark's kindness had an energizing effect on her heart. She mustered up the strength to squeeze his hand back tenderly.

The moment Clark recognized the signal of movement from her hand his gaze shot up in alarm. His eyes were glistening with amazement as he stared at her face.

"Lois," He muttered breathlessly. "I knew you heard me. I knew that you would wake up." His face lit up as he stroked her hand gently. He gazed at her longingly. She had forgotten how much she missed his kindness. He lowered his eyes slightly, seemingly embarrassed. "I'm sorry. I suppose I'm really the last person you want to see right now-" He started to stand up and take his leave but Lois squeezed his hand harder. Her eyes pleaded for him to stay. She attempted to remove the respiratory mask from her mouth, but Clark motioned for her to leave it. "You need to keep that on, Lois. I won't leave."

Lois removed her gaze scanned her body curiously. Clark immediately recognized her inquisitive expression and swallowed, "You suffered severe head trauma, class 3 hemorrhage wounds, a broken wrist and...quite a few stitches on your stomach." Clark brushed his finger softly against her cheek, "And exactly nine stitches for all the cuts on your face."

_Gee...I think that's a record._ Lois shifted restlessly, hating the fact that she knew she would be bound to the hospital bed for the next few, long days ahead of her.

"I should have got to you sooner. I'm sorry. I didn't hear you. I-I had no idea that you were on that train. I never imaged that you would..." Clark trailed off, purposely avoiding her gaze. "I missed you."

Lois smiled at him, _I missed you too, Clark. More than you'll ever know._ She squeezed his hand harder.

Clark was practically beaming with joy as he squeezed back. "Would you like to see Jason now?"

Lois nodded. Clark let go of the grip on her hand. "I'll be right back." Before he stood up, he leaned over her body and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. Lois could only smile back up at him. As he walked out of the room she took the chance to embrace the silence.

_I was so busy being angry. I forget how much I really missed him. _Lois stiffened; suddenly irritated at the fact that she may have been missing someone who wasn't even real. _What if he's a totally different person from both Superman and Clark? What if _everything _he told me was a lie? What if all of his kindness and love wasn't even real? _Lois was about to fall into a pool of doubts when an image from the back of her mind drifted to the surface. The sincerity and love in his face when he pulled her out of the car that day at the warehouse. She was about be taken hostage to god only knows where, when suddenly the car had jerked backwards, and Clark appeared in the doorway with that look on his face. She remembered it because it was a look she'd never seen before. It was a blend of Clark and Superman mixed together. She couldn't distinguish which side it came from, but it was filled with nothing but love and concern for her. She had seen the same look a few times since. It appeared again on Superman when he had pulled her out of the lake in Smallville. Her heart was filled with warmth when she saw that look.

_He cares about me. He loves me. How cold I ever doubt that? _She recalled that same expression for a final time just recently when she had been trapped under the large debris of metal from the train crash. _It's still him. He's still the same caring and strong man that I fell in love with. He's still Clark._ She reassured herself confidently._ He's still my Clarky._

"Mommy!"

Lois stirred from her thoughts when the bright little munchkin came bounding through the door, arms outstretched and a wide grin overtaking his face.

_Jason._

"Mr. Clark," He stared up at Clark who followed Jason back into the room, "Can I hug her?"

Lois felt the sharp prick of tears beginning to well up into her eyes when Jason softly touched her hand. "I don't want to hurt her."

Clark nodded, "Just be gentle."

Jason edged closer towards her face. He waved and simply smiled, "Hi Mommy." Lois lifted her hand and placed it on her son's cheek. "I'm sorry that I got you hurt." Jason's voice cracked as spoke about the train wreck. "I knew we shouldn't have gone on that silly train. I'm sorry that I made you take me to see Mr. Clark."

Lois shook her head. _It's not your fault, Jason. _She wanted to comfort him. She wanted to wrap her arms around her son and never let go.

"I want you to get better soon, okay? So that you and me, and Mr. Clark can live together again." Jason wiped his nose on his sleeve and sighed, "And I know that you were really angry at Mr. Clark." Jason sniffed as Clark crouched down and put his hand on Jason's shoulder. "But...did you forgive him?"

Lois stared back hard at her son. She raised her head slightly, and motioned for Clark to move closer.

She slowly rose her hand up towards his face. She rested her finger on the thick, black rim of his glasses and slowly slid them down the bridge of his nose. Clark didn't attempt to stop her. He swallowed hard as she carefully removed his glasses completely from his face. She handed them to her son, who was beaming back at her as she slowly nodded. _Yes, Clark. I forgive you. For everything. And I'm sorry too._

She gazed longingly up at Clark, wishing that she had the strength to tell him how she felt.

But the warm smile that spread across his lips, told her that she didn't need to say anything.

She knew he understood. He lowered his lips to her ear and whispered, "I love you, Lois."

She raised her hand and gave him a thumb up in agreement.

"Look, Mr. Clark! See, Mommy loves you too."

Lois smiled, and nodded. She watched her son place his arms around Clark's neck grinning happily.

_This is my family now, _She squeezed Clark's hand affectionately, _I'm awake now._

* * *

**Once again, please leave a review! They always make my day a little brighter in history class when I sit on the computer, ignoring my teacher, and checking my email. ;) Hope you also enjoy the oneshot "Alley!"**_  
_


	30. Relieved

**Chapter 30: Relieved**

"What the _hell _are _these_!?" Lois tore through the manila envelope, scattering the black and white photos over her blankets. "_How!?_ How could somebody take these photos without us noticing!?" She glared maliciously up at Clark, who simply shrugged his shoulders and sighed, "I really have no idea."

"And _you,_" Lois aimed her hostile glare directly at Chloe, who leaned securely against the hospital room door. "You should have told us about these photos _much _sooner! I have the right to know if I'm being stalked!"

"Shh," Chloe scolded harshly, "Keep your voice down, Lois."

Lois plonked her head back onto her flat, itchy pillow. "I want to know who took these photos. I want to know who had the _nerve_ to take pictures of my family." She reached for the colorless image that revealed a very private kiss between herself and Superman. "And I want to know why he sent _this _to Jimmy."

"Jimmy was being blackmailed, Lois. He received these photos in the mail. He tried to meet with the sender in the alley to discuss-"

"What alley?" Lois shot up in alarm.

Chloe tilted her head thoughtfully, "The alley on 14th street. Why does it matter?"

Lois felt her mouth run dry. _That's not just a coincidence is it? That's the alley where I was raped..._

Her gaze wandered up towards Clark who squeezed her hand, understanding that he was to say nothing about the alley. Lois had worked so hard to keep her incident a secret from her family. She couldn't voice her suspicions to Chloe, because she couldn't stand the idea of seeing that dreaded look of sympathy in her cousin's eyes for the rest of her life.

"It doesn't." Lois replied flatly. "Did Jimmy happen to get a clear look at the guy in the alley?"

"I don't know yet, Lois." Chloe responded, slightly irritated. "It's been nearly a week and he hasn't woken up yet."

"How is he doing?" Clark peeped up with a touch of concern in his voice.

"They refuse to tell me. They can't give me any other information on his status until they inform his family first. And his mother is vacationing in Hawaii." Chloe wrapped her arms around her chest and stared hard at the ground. "But when he does wake up, we'll find out exactly what went on down there." Chloe reached for the photo of herself with a stain of blood smeared across the image. "But we do know one thing,"

Chloe bit the bottom of her lip pensively, "Whoever was blackmailing Jimmy, knew about our past relationship. Not a lot of people do." She held up the photo of herself and waved it at Lois.

"So?" Lois shrugged, "What does that mean?"

"It means," Chloe began slowly. "Whoever sent him these photos would have probably found out about us through Jimmy himself."

"And?" Lois prompted her on.

"It means, whoever took these pictures, is probably somebody we know."

* * *

"How are you doing, Lois?" 

Lois blinked. Staring blankly up at the hundreds of square white tiles of the ceiling she replied in a monotone, "My blankets are scratchy, my head is killing me, the food is revolting, everyone on staff is completely idiotic, we have no leads on our stalker, and I'm board out of my mind." She lifted her head and glared fiercely at Clark as if he were a moron, "How do you _think_ I'm doing?"

"Okay," Clark sat down on the stool beside her bed, "So the hospital isn't exactly a four star hotel. It's only for a couple more days."

Lois was about to continue her moaning about her long, agonizing forty-two hour experience bound to a hospital bed, until a glittery, gold sparkle caught her eye. "What's that?" She motioned towards the glistening chain dangling from his pocket. Clark looked down and revealed the tiny heart-shaped locket that he had received as a Christmas present from her. "You still have that?" She grinned.

"Of course,"

Lois fixed her gaze on the locket curiously. "It feels sort of strange. I gave that to Superman, you, but it still feels odd seeing you hold it."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean," She began with a sigh, "Even after four months, I'm still trying to wrap my mind around the fact that you're..."She trailed off as she watched his face fall with disappointment.

"It's still me, Lois."

"I know." She nodded, continuing to make her point, "And I'm glad. But to tell you the truth, when I first found out about you, there was this other part of me that was sort of...relieved."

"Relieved? How?"

"Do you remember when I told you...Superman...that I was in love with Clark...you?"

"Yes I do." He couldn't help but smile a little as he recalled the memory, "But you felt so guilty."

"Exactly. I felt guilty because I had already replaced Richard with Superman, and I felt like I was doing it again by replacing Superman with Clark. But it was different. Superman was the father of my child. I felt like I was betraying him by falling in love with Clark." When Clark didn't respond, she went on, "And when I found out that you were both the same, kind and loving person, I felt relieved that I didn't have to choose. And that I didn't have to betray either one of you." Lois paused, and stared straight through his glasses, "You know that when I said that I loved you, I meant it. And I still do mean it."

A priceless expression of joy spread across his face, "And I mean it too."

Lois gripped his hand firmly. _Everything is going to be different now. Everything is going to be so much better with him. _She couldn't restrain the giggly grin tugging at the corner of her lips, _Jason loves Clark. _

_He should be able to adjust pretty well. Maybe if it all works out, I'll be able to move back to Metropolis. Maybe we can all start again._

"And you know, it sure did explain a lot once I found about you." Lois reflected aloud. "Your fake glasses, your strange allergic reaction to that kryptonite energy drink of Perry's and how you knew about Jason's paternity."

"Wow," Clark raised his eyebrows, slightly surprised. "You had a lot more on me than I thought."

"Yes well, I never really suspected that you would have anything to do with Superman let alone..."

Lois trailed off when she noticed that Clark's distracted gaze. She smiled patiently, "I guess I'm going to have to get used to that."

Clark's eyes drifted back towards her stare, "I'm sorry, Lois."

She shook her head, "Don't let me keep you." She waved him off quickly.

Before he stood up to leave, he kissed her tenderly on her hand. "I won't be too long."

"Clark," She called after him as he headed for the doorway, "Just...be careful, okay?"

Clark tilted his head with peculiar look, "Okay, sure..."

She pulled the covers over her shoulders as she continued to stare up at the ceiling and count the tiles,

_Please be careful, Clark. Until we find out who's taking these pictures, we all have to be very careful._

* * *

**Alright, so I realize that this chapter was pretty short. But I figured you all needed a breather before the pace picked up again. So I hoped you enjoyed. I wrote most of this entire chapter during biology this morning...I rally should start paying attention.**

**Thanks for the beta Lilly! Please leave a review!? I was SO inspired by all of the WONDERFUL reviews I received from the last chapter. That's probably why this one came so quickly. The next chapter will be up very soon!**


	31. Blame

**Thanks so much for all the wonderful reviews:) They always make my day! I hope you enjoy this chapter.**

**Thanks for the beta, Lilly!**

* * *

**Chapter 31: Blame**

_Thump._

Lois's eyelids reluctantly fluttered open. She raised her head slightly above her pillow, scanning the dim, gloomy shadows running across the dark walls of the tiny square hospital room. She restlessly twisted and turned in her sheets. She had only just began to fall into the light, calm serenity of sleep when she was disturbed by an uneasy thud. _What was that? _

"Code blue, room 302 in the North Wing."

The shadows of the hospital staff moved swiftly past her room, shouting various instructions at each other as they're rushed down the hallway.

_Room 302,_ Lois groggily recalled. _Jimmy..._

_Thump._

Lois pushed herself forward to sit up straight. _What is that noise? _She winced as a sharp sting shot through her fractured wrist.

_Thump._

"Clark?" She called out to the still silence of the dark. "Is that you?"

_Thump._

"Cla-" Lois suddenly felt a firm grasp creep around to the front of her face and tightly secure it against her mouth.

"Hello, sweetheart."

Her eyes widened at the eerie whisper. _He's here._

The grip against her mouth pressed down. Her head was jerked back against her pillow as she struggled to breathe. A figure slid into view at the corner of her eye. She squinted, the florescent lights on the ceiling in the hallway beamed onto his face, reliving his dark features.

_Richard?_

Richard didn't waste any time. For a brief moment, he released his firm hold on her mouth lunging for the door. The thin beam of light disappeared as he swiftly pushed it closed. Lois felt her heart pumping widely, practically prepared to explode out of her chest. Knowing she was alone in the pitch, black abyss with her sister's killer made her sick with terror.

"What are-" She barely mumbled before she felt his frozen grip press against her face again. She could sense that he was desperate for her to stay silent. Even a few muffled sounds could draw Superman's attention.

She frantically squirmed and stuck violently at the darkness, hoping to fend off Richard in anyway possible.

"Shh," He hissed in her ear softly. Blinded by the darkness, Lois could do nothing but wince as he placed his chilling fingers around her fractured wrist. He twisted it backwards and applied pressure against her mouth when she yelped out in pain.

"What's the matter, Lois?" Richard's venomous murmur filled her heart with panic. "Didn't you miss me?"

Lois turned away as a hot rush of breath sailed up her neck. The cold brush of his lips against her cheek sent alarming shiver down her spine.

"I'm here to protect you...I'm going to take you somewhere safe." Richard's silky, sinister voice grazed through the thick, bleak darkness. "You and Jason and I will begin a whole new life together. I can protect you, Lois." She felt his fingers slither from her wrist and twirl themselves delicately in her curls. "I can take you away from all that pain he caused you. You remember, right? You remember all of those night you would cry on me? You felt so rejected and so lost. I was there for you when he couldn't be. Don't you remember what we had?"

A sharp sting of tears pricked the surface of her eyes. A rushing wave of memories flooded her mind.

Christmas...birthdays...Jason's birth...even the simplest tender moments she spent with him at the_Planet _washed through her body. She had spent five, beautiful years with this man. Five years that she would never forget.

_I'm sorry, Richard._ She wanted so desperately to apologize. _I'm sorry that after everything we have been through, you had to throw it all away. _She could easily blame Richard and his violent behaviour for their broken relationship. _I never asked him to leave. He kidnapped Jason, he tried to kill Superman, and he killed my sister. I didn't do anything wrong...did I?_

And yet, there was this restless sense of guilt that lay dormant in the depths of her heart. If Richard had never done all of these terrible things, would she have still left him for Clark? If Richard had continued to be the charming, and gentle man that he had once been, would she have been able to forget about Superman? To reject Clark? Or would she have still left Richard anyway?

_It doesn't matter_, she would tell herself confidently. _Richard's actions are unforgivable. He's not the same man. His kindness and his love are gone._

"Do you _remember?_" The piercing stream of pain that shot through her wrist brought her back down to reality. _How can he do that?_ Lois moaned as his dry, clammy hand pushed down on her lips. _How can he say that he wants to protect us, but cause Jason and I so much pain...?_

Lois cringed as she was suddenly jolted sideways and dragged off of her bed by her fractured wrist.

Richard slid her out of the tangled mad of sheets and onto the cold tiled floor. She kicked furiously trying to escape his grasp.

He hauled her across the ground towards the sliver of light that poured through the cracks of the door.

"Please, Lois." He begged for her silent cooperation, "Please, don't make me hurt you more than I have to."

She didn't listen. She thrashed her legs about wildly still focusing all her effort into resisting.

"_Lois,_" He scolded sternly. When Richard removed his hand from her mouth and placed it on the metal door Lois tore herself away from grasp on her wrist. She didn't scream, she didn't call for him, instead she feebly whispered, "Why did you turn around?" She took in a ragged breath, "That day, on the seaplane. I asked you to turn around for Superman. You knew if you left him that he would die. He would have been out of your way, he would have been dead. Why did you turn back-?"

"Because you would have blamed me!" Richard finally lost his patience and hollered, "If I hadn't turned back, you would have blamed me for his death. In your eyes it would have been my fault. I knew that you would never forgive me."

"Blame?" Lois replied weakly. "You've done more than enough to let me blame you-"

"You think I didn't try to avoid those things!? You think I didn't try to win you back? But you gave me no choice, Lois. I tried so hard. I thought he would die in the hospital. I thought if I took you to see him, and you would have some closure." Richard kicked the door in frustration, clearly no longer caring who heard them. "Superman was_supposed _to die!"

Lois flung her left arm over her head, shielding herself from the door that had suddenly sprung open from the other side. She cautiously squinted up towards the doorway where stood the silhouette of a large, overpowering figure with a long, flowing cape trailing behind. Lois struggled to quickly push herself out towards the door as Superman whizzed past her. She crawled frantically, leaning against the beam of the doorway she rested her tearful gaze on Richard, the bright light from the hallway beaming down on his frantic expression. Her eyes glazed down from his face to his fist. He tightly clutched a thin, silver cylinder. She narrowed her eyes on the long tube as Richard fumbled to unscrew the lid.

_Is that a thermos?_ _What is he...?_ Her eyes widened when she saw the sickly green, glow of radioactive fluid swishing around in the cylinder.

"Superman! He's got-!" Lois's cries were drowned out by the sharp clanging of metal.

Superman lunged forward. Richard scrambled backwards into the I.V equipment as Superman maliciously reached out to grab him by the shoulders. Richard didn't put up much of a fight. He didn't need to. The liquid Kryptonite was doing most of fighting for him. There was a low rumbled, the ground almost seemed to tremble when Superman thrashed Richard against the wall. The dim, green radiance illuminating from the thermos was shoved into Superman's chest. Even in the shadows Lois could see that he was shaking, but his binding grip on Richard's shoulders didn't weaken in the slightest. The fierce look of determination on his face refused to allow Richard to escape again. Neither of them dared to say word, their burning gaze of hatred locked on one another.

Lois pushed herself out of the doorway and into the hall. She spotted only one elderly nurse who remained plastered against the wall. A petrified expression frozen on her face, still stunned from Superman's urgent arrival and his sudden brutal attack on Richard.

"Call security!" Lois snapped.

The nurse merely stuttered in protest, "B-but...why is h-he-" Her bewildered, mumbled whispers were cut off by a startling groan of pain. She had only torn her intense stare at the brawl for a split second, but that was just enough time for Richard to jolt forward, splashing a few droplets of the liquid up into Superman's face. His eyes were squeezed tight shut. Richard took this as his golden opportunity to escape.

He didn't hesitate to shove Superman's grasp away from his shoulders. His free hand clenched into a fist and he in one swift swing his hand collided with Superman's stomach. Lois half expected Richard's fist to have nothing but a tickle effect on Superman. Her jaw dropped open when instead, Superman was knocked off his feet and sent crashing to the floor.

_But it's only the littlest bit of Kryptonite...how could he-? _She stopped. As Richard walked forward a few paces into the light she noticed the glimmering, green hunk of meteor rock welded in the shape of a ring, attached to Richard's fist. _It's like he's got an endless supply of meteor rock...where is he getting it from?_

She watched helplessly as Richard tilted the thermos over-top of Superman, pouring the liquid meteorite toxin over his body. Richard's head snapped up in her direction. A foul sneer of disgust on his face as he stepped over Superman's body, who twisted and turned on the ground in agony.

_Clark..._Her heart ached as she watched him desperately struggling to his feet. She turned her attention towards Richard again. _What happened to you?_ Lois found herself speechless. There was nothing she could say to Richard that would take away all of the hurt he'd caused. _He's right. He was there for me when Superman wasn't. He was wonderful. Our life was wonderful. How could he wreck it?__Was it my fault? Did I make him do all these things?_

"It didn't have to be this way, Lois." Richard whispered in a dark and spiteful tone, "And _I_ blame _you_."

"Stop! Put your hands in the air!" Two security guards came rushing down the hall. Richard shot her a last hateful glance before he sprinted around the corner and out the door, onto the streets of Metropolis again.

* * *

"How long did you say you were engaged?" 

Lois felt a thick lump well up in her throat, "Five years. Almost six." She sat quietly back in the comforts of her scratchy covers, hands folded and vacant stare fixed on the shiny, polished boots of two intimidating policemen and a bulky security guard.

"Ms. Lane, has Mr. White done anything violent like this to you before?"

Lois swallowed hard, twiddling her fingers and fidgeting nervously. It was the worst thing that could have happened. Lois had done everything to keep the police uninvolved with Richard.

She didn't want them prying their noses into her life. Clark was already in enough trouble with the law. The attention from the police was discomforting. She couldn't risk exposing all of their secrets.

_Clark's secret is not just his anymore. It's Jimmy's, it's Chloe's, it's Jason's and it's mine. We are all responsible for protecting it. _

"No." She answered without hesitation, her fits clenching nervously. She knew that Clark wouldn't approve of her lies, not like he was one to talk. He wanted her to go to the police the day that Richard kidnapped Jason, but she refused. Richard knew that Superman was Jason's father. Richard would use that information to his advantage, but she wanted to do everything she could to prevent it. To keep him quiet. But it was too late for that now. Richard had brought the law down on himself. She didn't do anything wrong._ Did I?_

"You said Mr.White had threatened to take you to court over the custody rights of your son?" The policeman's low, steady grumble shook her out of her thoughts. "Yes, that's right."

"And he is your son's father, correct?"

Lois felt her mouth run dry. Her tongue swelled up like a balloon in her mouth. "Umm...w-well," She stuttered hopelessly, _What should I say?_ "It is sort...sort of c-complicated-"

"No, he is not."

Lois looked up, with a glint of relief rippling through her heart when she saw Clark standing meekly

in the doorway. "I am."

"You can't come in here sir," One of the security guards barked.

Lois smiled when he began to swiftly stride towards her bed. Ignoring the protests from the police, Clark folded his arms securely around her shoulders. It was as if the entire world around them had disappeared. What was only seconds felt like hours in his arms. She could have stayed like this forever. In his world. In their world, where there was no Richard, no Luthor, no photographs, everything was perfect.

Her hopes had been so high for the chance to start over with him, to make things right again. But she knew that would never happen now. They would always be in danger, always afraid, and never left alone.

_But it's worth it,_ She smiled, burying her face against his soft, flannel shirt. _Just for little moments. Just like this. It's all worth it._

Clark pulled away gently. Pushing his dark glasses back up the bridge of his nose he spoke faintly, "Are you alright?" He looked down massaging her wrist tenderly, "Did he hurt you?"

She shook her head. "But...Superman," She grasped his hand anxiously. "Is _he_ okay?"

Once Richard had bolted down the hall, Lois helped Superman to his feet. She guided him towards the door, dabbing furiously at the thick, green ooze of liquid over his body.Weakly, he took off towards the clouds where he could bathe in the sun's soothing rays.

"Yeah," Clark flashed a brief smile, "He's just fine."

"Alright this is quite enough," Lois tilted her head as an elderly man confidently strode into the room, waving at the police in annoyance. "Ms. Lane has been through enough for one day and she needs her rest."

His pleasant green eyes were fixed on her wrist. Lois blinked when she recognized Dr. Fallon from her regular appointments with Jason. "I assume you officers have asked all of your questions by now, so I will have to ask that you leave Ms. Lane in our care until she is well enough to make an official statement-"

"I'm not staying here." Lois replied forcefully. "I appreciate your concern Dr. Fallon. Thank you, officers."

She wanted them gone. She wanted to be alone with Clark. No more police, no more scratchy sheets, and no more decisions being made for her. "You said that I could be released tomorrow but I want to go home now."

"Nonsense, Ms. Lane. You have just been through a traumatic ordeal. There is no way that you can expect me to release you-"

"Dr. Fallon," Clark lowered his voice and placed his hand reassuringly on her shoulder. "I think it is best that Lois spends the night in the comforts of her own home. I doubt that she would get any decent rest now anyway. I will take her home," He gestured towards the policemen in the corner, "And I'll bring her to the station to make an official statement tomorrow."

Dr. Fallon shifted, his jaw tightening impatiently, "Fine. Ms. Lane, I have a few forms for you to sign before you leave."

* * *

Clark didn't waste any time getting Lois as far away from that hospital as he could. He flew her back to her apartment quickly, hoping to spend some time scouting the skies for any sign of Richard. "I don't think that Richard has figured out that you moved to Gotham. You'll be safe here." He made sure she was settled comfortably back into her apartment before heading out into the crisp, night air on the balcony. 

"Where are you going?" Lois hugged her chest for warmth as she approached him wearily. "Does somebody need you?"

"No," He shook his head. "But I was going to try and look for Richard before he-"

"You shouldn't." Lois bit her lip and stared hard at the ground. "Clark, he's got _so _much Kryptonite. You saw it. Luthor is preparing him. He's welding it into rings and bullets, melting it into liquid, who knows what he's going to create next."

"I can't let that stop me from trying. He can't get away with everything he's done."

"But...he might leave us alone now. You told the police that you...Clark, are the father of Jason. Which, I might add was a pretty foolish thing to do."

"But it's okay now. I took the paternity test and it _proves_ that Richard is not his father."

Lois shifted uneasily, "In any case, Richard didn't start behaving this way until I told him that Superman was Jason's father. I think...maybe now, Richard might not come after us anymore. I think he wanted Jason. And he was angry at me."

"That doesn't make it right, Lois. Richard has to pay."

Lois swallowed, her fists clenching tightly. "Is it my fault, Clark?"

Clark narrowed his eyes and tilted his head, "Is what your fault?"

"Richard didn't used to be like this you know. He used to be so kind, and compassionate. He was there for me when you-" Lois stopped and let her eyes drop to the floor. "When you were not. He was a wonderful father to Jason. Even when you came back, he turned back to save you on the seaplane. He took me to see you in the hospital. And it just sickens me that he can turn around and spit in my face." A tense ball of anxiety knotted in her chest. "So...I was just thinking that maybe I did something-"

"Lois," Clark cut her off sharply, "You have done nothing wrong. You did not ask Richard to leave. You did not make Richard commit all of those crimes. It was his decision. You are in no way to blame for anything that has happened." When Lois didn't respond Clark walked forward and wrapped his arms around her, "It's all going to work out now. Richard has no power over us anymore. We'll find out who is taking these pictures and stop them too. And then one day you and I and Jason, Chloe and Jimmy-"

"Jimmy!" She suddenly exploded. "Just before Richard came in I heard the staff running towards his room. I think something went wrong."

Clark stepped back onto the balcony, "I'll go back and find out what happened."

"Alright, but please Clark," Lois whispered faintly. "Don't go looking for Richard tonight."

With a moment of hesitation Clark nodded before he took off into the velvet sky again.

Lois shivered and pulled her jacket over her shoulders. _I hope it's true, Richard. I hope I'm really not to blame for what you've done. _As she slid her hands down deeper into her pockets, her fingers fished out something long and hard at the bottom. Lois held the strange object up to the moonlight where she could inspect it properly. It appeared to be a computer memory stick She bit the bottom of her lip curiously, _This isn't mine. _She didn't hesitate to head back inside and pop the plastic stick of data into her laptop.

Her fingers tapped on her desk nervously as a folder popped up. When she clicked on the folder, an image appeared across the screen that took her breath away.

It was a close up picture of herself and Clark embracing in the hospital. No more than a few minutes after Richard had already escaped. She scrolled down the page. Underneath the photo was a big, bold text that sent a chill down her spine. _You're sick._ A stream of fury pulsed through her veins. He was mocking her with these words. This one simple phrase was enough give her a burning sensation of hatred for the photographer behind this camera.

_**He's always around, sweetheart.**_

* * *

**Like? Not like? Please leave a review!!!!**

**More to come very soon! **_**  
**_


	32. Facing reality

**SMALLVILLE SEASON 6 SPOILER WARNING:**

**This chapter contains spoilers for the finale of Smallville Season 6, regarding Chloe's powers.**

**Please leave a review! They are always appreciated! Great job with the beta, Lilly! Thanks! **

* * *

**Chapter 32: Facing reality**

Chloe sniffed and hugged her knees tightly against her chest. There was a slight tingling sensation in her left pocket. Her cell phone had been vibrating for the past twenty minutes; probably Lois wanting to know what was going on. But Chloe didn't have the courage to bring herself to speak to her. To say it out loud would make it real.

_It's not real, it's not true. _Chloe buried her face between her knees. She didn't care if anybody saw her. She didn't want to move. She sat curled up against the wall in the hallway and didn't want to budge until Jimmy woke up. Her whole body was numb. The shock was like a lightning bolt rattling through her brain.

_"It could be days, weeks, or months, Ms. Sullivan." _Those few words from Jimmy's doctor wouldn't leave her alone. They echoed throughout her mind. They almost didn't seem to make sense to her. She couldn't grasp the idea of Jimmy laying in that bed for the rest of his life. He felt so close, like he was just sleeping. She didn't understand. Jimmy didn't deserve this. _"Or never at all."_

"Chloe." She felt a light brush against her arm. She didn't bother to look up, and hugged her knees tighter. "Why are you on the floor? What happened?" There was a slight crack in his voice, as if he already knew the answer.

"I feel so helpless, Clark." Chloe mumbled. "But I know what I_should_ do."

"What did they say, Chloe?" Clark crouched down beside her, "How is Jimmy?"

Chloe finally lifted her blurry face from her knees. She stared straight ahead at the other side of the hall. She didn't have the will to look him in the eye.

_Once I tell him, it'll be real._ Part of her wanted to keep her mouth closed and pinch herself awake from this bad nightmare. The other part wanted to scream it out loud and let everything out.

"In the middle of the night," Chloe began softly, "Jimmy's oxygen was cut off. He stopped breathing and went into cardiac arrest." The words were so painful to say. It felt wrong to be talking about him like this. It felt wrong to think that poor Jimmy was the one to suffer. "At the same time," She pushed herself on. "Jimmy suffered at massive head injury. A blood clot formed in his brain." She couldn't hold it in any longer. She sobbed and let the tears roll down her cheeks. "Clark, Jimmy slipped into a coma." _There. I said it. It's real. He's really gone._

Chloe turned her head and gazed longingly at her friend. For a long moment, Clark said nothing. He was speechless. There was a ghostly flash that passed through Clark's eyes. He knew as well as she did that Jimmy was the last person who deserved this.

"H-how?" Clark stuttered faintly. "Head injuries? How? I mean...if he was here-"

"I spoke with the police," She leaned her head against the wall, "They told me what happened to Lois. They told me Richard was here..."

_Richard. That son of a bitch. _Chloe had only met the man a few times. Grandmother's 70th birthday, Jason's birth, a new year's eve party and Lucy's wedding anniversary. He was pleasant, handsome, and had a bright smile that lit up the room. He was one of those picture perfect, nine to five guys that still had time to coach the junior soccer league on the weekend. She thought Lois had found a real prince charming.

But now, even the sound of his name made her sick. "The only way Jimmy's oxygen could have been cut off, is if somebody unplugged the tube. His brain injuries, they can't explain. But they found the vase and flowers that I brought him smashed on the ground. Jimmy's blood was all over the glass." Chloe closed her eyes, praying that she would wake up now. "I guess Richard doesn't know how to clean up after himself." There was a tightening in her chest, like she couldn't breathe. A tremor shook in her voice as she whispered, "I know what I have to do."

Clark suddenly shot out of his trace, "You mean...use your-"

"I can heal him, Clark!" She grabbed him by the shoulders narrowed her eyes on his glasses, "I can wake him up. You know I can. All I have to do is walk in there and-"

"You can not risk that. You _know _what happens every time you try to use them. You ended up in a morgue, Chloe-"

"That was just the first time. The effects haven't been that extreme since."

"You've only done it a few times. You don't know what could happen-"

"Clark, this is Jimmy's life we're talking about!" Her eyes were ablaze. Every fibre in her body was screaming at her to run to Jimmy and bathe him in a pool of her tears. She wanted somebody to say that it was the right thing to do. She was scared, and wanted her friend to support her. "I _can't _let him lay there forever."

Clark's disapproving stare dimmed. She knew that Clark wanted to help Jimmy just as much as she did. But he shook his head, "Just give him some time. Maybe he'll wake up on his own."

"And maybe he _won't._ What am I supposed to do?" She was looking for something in his eyes that wasn't there. She wanted reassurance. When they were growing up, Clark was the one she looked to for help. He was always there. A true friend that always knew exactly what to say. But he didn't say anything this time. He stared at her, just as confused and as hurt as she was.

Her stomach did a number of back flips as she lowered her gaze." There's more..."

Clark exhaled tiredly, as if he was bracing himself for Chloe's next baring of bad news. "Ben Hubbard passed away about two hours ago." His anxious face fell. His mouth dropped open as he backed up against the wall and sunk down, joining her on the floor.Chloe swallowed and placed her hand affectionately on his shoulder, "I'm sorry you had to find out through me. You're mother...she's devastated."

Clark didn't reply. He didn't even blink. He just stared vacantly at the ceiling. Chloe bit the bottom of her lip thoughtfully. "I know this is a lot to take in at once." She reached for his hand gently. "But I really think you should be with your mother right now."

Clark shook his head and continued to stare at the ceiling, "I should be with her, and you, and Jimmy, and Lois. All of you have been through so much tonight. And I..." Clark trailed off swallowing hard, "I can't do anything to help."

Chloe leaned her head against his shoulder, "Clark, sometimes you don't really have to do anything. You don't have to be a hero to help. Believe it or not, sometimes just being there for someone is more than enough."

Chloe's eyes lit up when Clark smiled down at her. "You're a good friend, Chloe." His face was filled with pride. "Thank you."

Chloe patted his hand lightly, "You are very welcome. Now, go visit your mother."

"What about you?" Clark's eyes shifted towards Jimmy's room.

"I'm going to stay with him for awhile."

"Chloe, don't use your-"

"I won't." She raised her hand in the air, "Scout's honor. I'll give him time."

Clark stood up quickly. "Jimmy _will _pull through this," He reassured her with a confident nod of his head, "He will wake up."

Chloe couldn't do anything but smile in agreement. She reluctantly pushed herself up off the floor. _It's real now. _She took a deep breath and stepped into Jimmy room._ You'd better be right, Clark._ The second her eyes rested on Jimmy's motionless body she felt her heart break into a million pieces. Her face flushed and her eye's became blurry._Because these tears won't wait forever._

* * *

**SMALLVILLE SPOILER WARNING: For those of you who don't know, Chloe's tears have healing powers. But when she uses them, they can kill her or weaken her very badly. This was seen in the Smallville season 6 finale. Just thought I should let you know if you were confused during this chapter.**

**Pretty short chapter again. Please leave a review! I love them! The next chapter is going to finally reveal some of your burning questions...**


	33. Putting the pieces together

**Chapter 33: Putting the pieces together**

"Shelby!" Jason dropped his red Crayola pencil crayon and bolted away from the table. "Hi boy! I missed you." He fell to his knees on the carpet and wrapped his little arms around Shelby's shaggy, golden pelt. The dog gave Jason a few quick licks on his cheek as Jason giggled with delight.

"Hey, what about me?" Clark lowered his head, pretending to be hurt as he walked in the door. "Don't I get a hug too?"

"Mr. Clark," Jason chuckled as Shelby circled him curiously. Prodding his nose at his stomach and sniffing fiercely. "Shelby's tickling me."

A small smile tugged at the corner of Clark's lips. Seeing Jason so carelessly joyful with his dog was a sight for sore eyes. He was pleased to see that someone could still smile with everything that had happened over the last few days.

_Thank goodness for you, Jason._

Ben Hubbard's death took a hard toll on his mother. Clark hadn't seen her so upset since his father died. Coming home after a long, painful talk with his mother was a relief.

"Why did you bring Shelby here? Don't you want him anymore?"

Clark crouched down and stroked the top of Shelby's head. "Well, Shelby is sort of homeless right now. My apartment doesn't allow dogs. I thought you would like to look after him for awhile."

Jason's eyes widened and his face beamed back at Clark, "Really!? Thank you, Mr. Clark! I'll feed him, and walk him, and bathe him, and brush him, and play with him, and-"

"But," Clark interrupted sternly, "Only if your mother says it's okay."

Jason's grin faded, "I was never allowed to have a dog before because of allergies."

Clark's eyes narrowed, "Are you allergic to dogs, Jason?"

"No," He chimed pleasantly. "Mommy is a little bit allergic. She sneezes a lot. But Daddy is the one who is _really_ allergic to dogs." Jason snickered, "One time, we went to my Auntie Lucy's house and she had a huge black dog that was even bigger than me! _This _wide!" Jason extended his arms to dramatize the size. "Daddy didn't even touch the dog and his face went red and puffy like a balloon. He had to go to the hospital..." Jason bit his lip impishly, "But I thought he looked pretty funny."

Clark blinked hard. "But that can't be..." He mused aloud. _Richard _can't _be allergic to dogs..._

"He's_ deathly_ allergic," Jason clarified. "So, Mommy said no dog's allowed. But I think she'll let us keep Shelby now."

"Where is your mother now?" There was a restless suspicion stirring in Clark's mind.

Jason only shrugged his shoulders lamely, "I think she is sleeping."

"Tell her I'll be back later, okay?"

"Where are you going? You just got here!"

"I'll be back soon," He promised. "Then we'll play catch with Shelby."

"Okay," Jason grumbled. "But be quick."

* * *

_Snap._

That was the forth pencil Clark had snapped in half in the last hour.

He was doing everything in his power to keep from picking up the computer and hurling it across the newsroom. His vicious gaze was fixed on the police file across screen. A fiery, surge of hatred seized through his veins.

"One day I am going to get caught hacking these police records." Chloe sighed, pulling up a chair beside his desk.

Clark didn't remove his glare from the screen, "Did you know that Richard has been charged twice with violent assault?"

Chloe raised her eyebrow, "I did not."

"Both times it was against Marie St. Clair and Natalie Bain. I spoke with Perry. Both of them were his ex-girlfriends."

"Well at this point," Chloe began, eyeing Richard's records maliciously. "I wouldn't put anything past him."

"Well, guess what," Clark's jaw tightened. "There women were raped and murdered in the alley on 14th street over the course of five years. Two of them were Marie and Natalie."

Chloe's gaze shifted, "14th street? That's the same alley Jimmy met our mysterious photographer in."

Clark nodded. _It's also the same alley that Lois was raped in._

"So, what made you so suspicious of Richard all of a sudden? Besides the fact that I have officially declared that _he_ is the root of all evil."

Clark handed her a copy of the article Jimmy wrote five years ago about Lois's incident. "Richard is allergic to dogs."

"So?" Chloe lowered her eyes on the article and read aloud, "Planet_ women raped, where is Superman_?" She gasped. "No way! Somebody here was raped? Who?"

Clark swallowed the large lump of guilt welling up in is throat. "It's not exactly my place to tell you. But I can't track him down without your help. Read it." He watched Chloe's eyes skim the first few lines of the column.

"_Superman is still nowhere to be found, even when the _Daily Planet's _own star reporter, Lois Lane_-"

Chloe stopped. Her eyes widened as she covered her mouth and read on silently. The color drained away from her face and she took in a sharp breath. "Lois," She whispered faintly. "How...why...why didn't she tell me?"

"If you were in her position, would you go spreading that kind of news around?" Clark muttered darkly.

"But I'm her cousin! Why didn't she tell anyone? How could this happen? How could _you_ let it-" Chloe bit her tongue. Her eyes fell on his glasses, "I forgot you were away. You weren't here."

"And if I hadn't left, it never would have happened."

Chloe turned back to Richard's profile. "So," She spoke softly, "What does this have anything to do with Richard's canine allergy?"

Clark swivelled around in his chair to face the monitor and waved for her to continue, "Keep reading." There was about thirty seconds of silence before Chloe's mouth fell open. "_At approximately three in the morning_," Her voice shook as she mumbled out loud, "_Richard White stumbled upon Lane's unconscious body in the alleyway while searching for his missing dog_." Chloe closed her eyes. "Oh my god, how could anyone have_ missed _that?"

"You'd be surprised what people tend to neglect." His voice was practically dripping with irony. "Richard made up that entire story. According to Jason, Richard can't get anywhere near a dog let alone own one."

"That's pretty low. Even for him." Chloe crumpled up the article and aimed for the trash can.

"I've found a lot more," He motioned Chloe towards the computer. "24 Burton drive, Gotham." Clark moved his cursor to highlight the address, "At the time Lois was raped, Richard didn't even live in Metropolis. Even if he tried to get away with explaining that the dog was somebody else's, there is no way it would have ran across Gotham and into Metropolis in that amount of time."

Chloe's eyes were practically popping out of their sockets, "Why don't the police know anything about-"

"They do. They know it all. I spoke with the inspector Martin, the detective that was handling Lois's case five years ago. They connected the dots. But they had no way to prove Richard had anything to do with what happened that night." Clark spoke quickly, his voice growing deeper. The more he thought about Richard, the more his body shook with anger. "Richard had an air tight alibi. Apparently, his two friends had been with Richard that night, the entire time Lois would have been raped. Inspector Martin informed me that they had been looking for his dog, but decided to call it a night. They were on their way to a late dinner and cut through the alley, where they stumbled upon Lois. Conveniently, the other two men didn't want to get involved. So that left Richard to be the gallant hero, coming to Lois's rescue." Clark paused, shifting to the screen. "So even though the police weren't completely buying that story, they still didn't find any hard evidence that pointed towards Richard." He clicked the tab on the toolbar below. Two more police profiles popped up, "But," Clark began slowly, "I did some digging on the other two men that were supposedly with Richard that night." His cursor rotated around their photos, "Brutus Stark and Stanford Collins. Both of them worked for Lex Luthor. Brutus was killed on the ship by the piano, and Stanford on New Krypton."

"Of course!" Chloe finally exclaimed. "If Richard and the other two were all working for Lex, they would come together to protect one another. To create a fake alibi."

"Exactly," Clark heaved a long sigh, "All the pieces fit perfectly together."

Chloe rubbed her temple, "So what is it exactly that you're trying to prove here? That Richard had something to do with Lois's rape?"

A dark shadow flashed across Clark's expression, "I think he had everything to do with it. I think...I _know_ he was the one who followed her down the street and dragged her into that alley. Richard raped her, Chloe."

Chloe sunk down in her chair. A overwhelming look of shock took over her face. "It makes perfect sense. He had a violent history with the other two women, and they ended up dead in that alleyway. Lois was lucky enough to survive. Once he raped her, he went back to make sure she was dead. She wasn't...and," Chloe stopped, trying to fit the remainder of the puzzle together, "And there were probably some people looking down from their apartment. There were too many people around, Richard couldn't finish her off. So he took her to the hospital."

Clark felt as if his blood was boiling though his system, "When she was in the hospital with Richard, she found out she was pregnant. Richard must have automatically assumed the child was his."

"So he jumped at the chance to take advantage of them both and start over. In a sick and twisted way, he created his family. His second chance." Chloe shyly gazed up at Clark, "And when Superman came back after all those years, he must have cracked. Now knowing that Jason wasn't his must have destroyed him. He tried to be this picture perfect prince for five years but went crawling back to Luthor when you showed up."

"And after all that, there is still no hard core evidence to prove it." Clark's firm grip on his pencil tightened, shattering it into a hundred splinters. "He got away with everything."

A severe pang of hate for Richard passed through his body. Clark was accustomed to dealing with the low-life scum of the human race on a daily basis. But the rest of the evil in the world couldn't even compare with what Richard had done. At the heart of every crime was a reason. That reason was almost always drugs, money or sex. But this was a lot more. This was carefully planned and thought out. Richard had thought of everything. An innocent man, only looking for his lost dog was so simple it was perfect. Even brilliant. This wasn't about the desperate acts of a druggie looking for his next fix, it wasn't about the thousands of dollars Luthor was paying him to carry out his dirty work, and it wasn't even about a few moments pleasure with unsuspecting women in the alley. No, this was about entertainment. This was about Luthor's sheer delight, knowing that the one person in the entire world that could bring Superman to his knees, was dieing in the alleyway. This was about Luthor having fun.

"What are you going to do now?" Chloe eyed him carefully. "Track down Richard?"

Clark was hesitant with his answer, "I will. But I think first...Lois deserves to know the truth about that night."

Chloe tilted her head sympathetically, "Yes she does. Even if Richard doesn't get out locked up for her rape, we can still get him for his outbursts on Lois and attempted murder on Jimmy."

"But how can I do that to her, Chloe? It'll destroy her." Clark's pleading eyes stared up at her, "How can I tell her that the man she was engaged to for five years is the same man who cornered her down in that alley?"

* * *

**So I know that chapter was a lot to swallow. Please leave a review! I would really like to hear your reactions on this chapter! Thanks for the beta, Lilly!  
**

**Alright, so I have a question for you readers. I saw Superman II for the first time ever yesterday. I loved it! Just as much as I loved the first one! Now, I've never seen the third or the fourth Superman. I've read some things on the internet and I am a little bit confused. A lot of people say they didn't like Superman three or four. My question is...why? What makes it so different from the first two? As I said, I've read a few different things on the internet, and one of the things I read was that Lois Lane is not in Superman three and four. Is that true? Please tell me that's not true. Depending on what you readers have to say will determine weather I bother to rent Superman three and four, or not. So please leave a review! I'd really like to know what you think of this chapter and Superman three and four!**


	34. Closure

_**Chapter 34: Closure **_

"Fetch, Shelby!" Jason tossed the soppy, tattered baseball across the lush, green field of grass stretched out before him. "Go get the ball!" He giddily clapped his hands together as Shelby ripped across the park and leaped into the air. The dog's jaw clamped firmly around the ball. He bounded back to Jason as his tail eagerly waved back and forth in delight. Shelby dropped the drippy ball of saliva into Jason's palms and nudged his cold, wet nose at his waist.

"Good job, boy." Jason praised as he ran his hand soothingly along the dog's golden pelt. "Hey, Mommy! Watch this!"

Lois waved back at Jason, as he turned to Shelby and commanded him to roller over. The dog did exactly as instructed and Lois's lips formed into a small smirk when Jason jumped up and down in amusement.

_You're late. _Lois twisted her wrist glancing at the slow, ticking face of her watch. The slightest tinge of annoyance tingled down her spine when the alarming shriek from a siren echoed throughout the city. A white and red ambulance whizzed down the street in a blur.

She couldn't repress an irritated sigh, _And now you're going to be even later. _Clark had promised Jason that he would take him to _Chuck E Cheese _arcade in Metropolis for the day.

Lois leaned against the back of the bench and closed her eyes. She stretched her arms up and tilted her head towards the bright blue sky. She bathed in sunlight, soaking in the last few days of the summer weather.

"Okay, now sit boy." She watched Jason crouch down on the grass. The afternoon sunlight was glistening down in his fair, tangled hair. "He's good, isn't he Mommy? Mr. Clark trained him well. When Daddy comes to visit we can show him all the tricks Shelby can do."

Lois chewed her lower lip, and nodded discreetly. Jason still hadn't given up hope that Richard would come back. _Of course he hasn't. I haven't had the nerve to tell him that Richard isn't even is father._

She didn't have the heart to break it to him. Jason had so much faith in Richard and he still loved him.

_I'll tell him one day. _She promised herself. _But not yet..._

"Are you sure you should be out here by yourself, Lois?" She felt a soft weight fall down onto her shoulders. "We don't know where Richard is, and we don't know who's taking these pictures. You need to be careful."

"It's not like we had a choice. We waited at the train station, but_ somebody _was busy." Lois sighed, staring up at Clark who massaged her shoulders in a smooth rhythmic motion. "I'm sorry I'm late. There was a car accident."

"Well, as you can see, you can't _always _be around. And I can't keep Jason cooped up forever. Besides," Her eyes narrowed as she glanced down uneasily at her twiddling fingers. "I was thinking about...trying to get in touch with Richard." She didn't need remove her gaze to know that Clark's jaw had practically fell open to the ground. Averting his intense stare of dismay she added, "I thought it might be a good idea. I mean, I wouldn't speak to him. I thought about writing a letter to my..._his_house. He probably still goes there once in awhile so maybe he would see it and..." She trailed off, regretting any mention of the idea at all. She knew it was a stupid and foolish thing to even think about. So idiotic, that it almost seemed to make perfect sense to her. She was looking for something, and she knew that Richard was the only one that could give it to her. "It would just be a harmless little note." She shrugged uncertainly. "He was angry. I want him to know that I'm sorry if I hurt him. He's never really given me that opportunity in any face to face confrontation we've had..." She could practically feel the heat from Clark's burning gaze. His lips parted as if they were trying to compel some sort of response.

"You_ know _you can't do that."

A hint of annoyance rippled through her face when he dismissed her idea so quickly, "Why not?" She stiffened, "It's not going to do any harm. In fact, it might make him feel better. He might even-"

"Lois, stop." She could tell where this was going. "You can not risk engaging in any immediate form of contact with that man. I don't have to tell you that." His gaze wandered out towards the field and rested on Jason, "Please, tell me you haven't already sent it-"

"I haven't, Clark." She retorted defensively. "I don't need you to tell me that it's just downright stupid. I have the guilty little voice nattering in the back of my mind for that." Her fists clenched into tight balls as she drew in a sharp breath, "Richard didn't start acting differently until I told him that Jason wasn't his son. I don't think it was Superman that was bothering him at all. He took me to see you in the hospital."

There was a discomforting chill that drifted up her spine, "But I don't understand why Jason's real paternity would make him destroy everything we had. It just doesn't make any _sense_."

_There had to have been something else. I must have done something. _She shook her head at a loss for any explanation, "I just want to find some sort of closure..."

Clark said nothing for a moment. He stared blankly across the park through his glasses. His shoulders rose high as he heaved a heavy sigh. "I think...there's something you should know about Richard."

* * *

A watery, ghost like haze seemed to cloud over Lois's hypnotized stare down the long, narrow passageway before her. Her knees were quaking violently. She stumbled forward, leaning against the crumbling red bricks like a crutch. A numb tingling sensation spread through her veins. There was a swirling, gut wrenching storm brewing in the pit of her stomach. 

_He's lying._ She reminded herself confidently,_Clark is a liar._

The alley spun around her, and the stretch of pavement seemed to be a never-ending path of darkness.

"_I've been doing some research, Lois." Clark's morbid tone bounced off the walls of her mind. "Into...what happened to you five years ago...in the alley." _

_Lois felt the color drain away from her face. "I told you," she muttered through gritted teeth. "Not to go snooping around. It happened a long time ago. I'm over it. I just-"_

"_I know who did it." Clark cut her off sharply with a whisper._

_Lois froze. She let her gaze flow apprehensively up at Clark's sympathetic expression. She didn't reply._

_For years, she had picture this moment. The moment when the truth would finally bubble to the surface. The moment that she would no longer have to hang her head in shame. The moment that the identity of the masked man in the shadows, who caused her so much pain and disgrace, would finally be revealed to her._

_Part of her wanted to grab Clark by the shoulders and shake the living daylights out of him until he spoke the name. That part of her wanted justice, and closure. Maybe even a little of her dignity restored._

_The other part of her wanted to ignore it. As if it never happened. Ignorance is bliss, and Lois was already forced to carry that night like a giant scare across her face for the rest of her life. She didn't want to have to carry a name too._

She staggered a few paces forward before her knees jiggling like jelly finally gave way and let her collapse.

She winced when she hit the pavement._ He's wrong. _She wanted to scream to the world._Richard didn't do it. He couldn't have._But the harsh and cruel facts had been neatly presented before her. Clark let the truth come tumbling out of his mouth. A wave of shock washed over her like an icy chill. Richard could have easily pulled it off. _"He lived in Gotham, Lois. He was deathly allergic to dogs. There's just no way he could have possibly found you by chance in that alleyway...He knew you were there, because he _put _you there."_

It all seemed so obvious to her now. The dark clouds of mystery that hovered over her head, fogging the truth for the last five years cleared away at last. _This is the truth, Lane. Now matter how terrible it is, this is the truth. This is what you have dedicated your life to. You live for the truth. You work for the truth..._

Lois hated to admit it, but her insatiable curiosity had been eating away at her for years, wondering what kind of person would have the nerve to ignore her pleading cries, and then toss her away like a piece of trash. _Now why can't you accept it? Your fiancé...your Richard, did this to you. _But now that she did finally feel that weight of pain and mystery lifted off of her shoulders, a whole new block of despair took its place._How could he do that to me? I gave him everything. _Never would she have dreamed that the man she gave her heart so willingly to, would be responsible for her haunting night of terror.

A lurching bulge formed up in her stomach. She tipped her head forward on her hands and knees. Her face squinted and eyes closed when a slimy sensation slithered up into her throat. _I'm going to be sick._

She leaned forward and let the thick, spew of vomit pour out of her mouth and splash onto the blacktop.

_This is it,_ She threw herself up against the wall and wiped her sleeve against her mouth, _I've finally hit rock bottom._

Disgusted with herself, Lois didn't bother to brush away the tears that dripped down her pale cheeks.

"_He's been playing you," _She closed her eyes and let her mind drift back to Clark's cruel weight of reality crushing down on top of her. _"Chloe and I are trying to figure out how to prove it, but there doesn't seem to be any hard core evidence that the police don't already-"_

"_Chloe?" Lois whimpered weakly. Now Chloe knew. That ruined everything. She wanted nothing more than to keep her night of shame a secret from her family. And now her cousin, who was practically her sister, would never look at her the same way. Lois would never be able to look at her again without that dreadful expression of pity reflecting in her cousin's eyes. "Why did you tell her, Clark?"_

"_I needed her help. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do any harm but I had to-"_

"_Don't." She raised her hand to silence him. She blinked as she stared across the park at Jason, who sprinted across the grass with Shelby bounding behind. "Just watch him. I have to go..."_

_She left Clark on the bench stammering after her. She let her racing heart guide her swiftly across the park and down the street. The people that she passed were only a blur, her mind only focused on one destination. Almost as if something were pulling her down the sidewalk several blocks away from the park. She hadn't been down the streets of Metropolis in almost six months. There were too many memories and Gotham was a much safer city for her now. But she would never forget the exact route she needed to take to 14th street._

_Lois stopped and drew in a sudden breath of panic when she came to the entrance. Her eyes only gazed down the thin passageway for a brief moment before a rushing stream of adrenaline pumped through her heart. She watched helplessly as the images of that night that had been burned into her brain forever flashed across the ground before her eyes._

It had taken every ounce of her energy just to breathe. It even hurt to move. And now, as she lay collapsed on the ground in her pool of vomit, a shiver of fear rippled through her. There was a distinct sense of darkness that lingered between the walls. A thick, and almost evil like aura radiated from the pavement.

And yet, even with its dreary characteristics there was something about this alley that she liked. A somewhat twisted sense of contentment was gained when she let her fingers brush against the rough textured bricks.

_I shouldn't be here._ A voice of common sense rang in her ears. But she didn't move. She didn't think that she had anything inside that was strong enough to lift her from the cold, hard blacktop. _Everything I have ever done with Richard has been fake. My life has been a lie. _Her blurry, hollow gaze scanned her body with disdain. _I'm a fraud. He's never even felt a pinch of remorse. _So many times now she had confronted Richard after they separated. She never even found a glint of regret in his deep, green depths. Richard wasn't like everyone else. He didn't look down on her because of that night. And Lois could not deny that she appreciated him for that. _But it's only because he didn't even care. He's not even sorry. He doesn't regret what he did to me._

_But why should he be? _Another echo of reason whispered, _He got everything because of that night. He got a family two for one deal all at my expense._

Richard dared to place his arms around her and kiss her every single night. He had the courage to lay next to her without a guilty conscious haunting his dreams. And he had the nerve to try and become the father of _her _son.

_I let him near Jason..._Another sickly ball welled up in her stomach. _Oh God, what if he did something to Jason? How could I have let them even be alone in the same room together? How could I not see?_

Twice she had let a man deceive her of what was right before her eyes. She'd gone all these years letting Clark deceive her, and now it was repeating through Richard.

She folded her trembling arms around her chest and pulled her knees close. _I led Richard to everyone. He murdered my sister. He put Jimmy in a coma..._She sniffed and her shoulders heaved up and down as she sobbed aloud, "It's my fault."

"No," A stern and confident voice snapped her attention away from the walls. "It's not."

Her eyes shot open and she turned her stare toward the entrance. Her heart seemed to lift a little when she saw a faint outline standing tall and proud between the walls. She knew it would only be a short matter of time before he came for her. _Her_ hero. The only one she could depend on to rescue her from the depths of hell and back, stood before her, spectacles and all.

"Where's Jason?" She inquired in a weary, hoarse voice. Clark stepped towards her, "I took him to my mother's apartment." He reassured her, "I thought you might need a day or two to..." He trailed off as she motioned for him to come closer.

"Let it all sink in?" She finished.

Clark swallowed, seemingly unsure of what to say. He shifted uncomfortably for a moment, and decided to say nothing. He knelt down to her level and placed his back firmly against the brick wall beside her. He gracefully took her hand and decided to let her do the talking.

"You know," She began softly with a sob, "I don't think I've ever felt so defeated in my entire life," She sniffed, and locked her fingers in between his. "After everything he's done, there is still a part of me that loves him." She glanced up at Clark, her eyes glimmering with tears, "Is that wrong?"

Clark didn't hesitate to comfort her with a solid and heartfelt, "No, Lois," His bright blue eyes were piercing through his glasses.

Lois drank in his gentle touch as he brushed away a few of her tears. "All I want from him is an apology."

She let her head rest against his shoulder, "I thought... if I could just get him to stop and think, even for a moment... he might apologize. I'll probably never forgive him. But I want to try. I want to try so that I don't have to completely regret the last five years of my life." As if every nerve in her body high suddenly gone slack, she let herself fall into Clark's warm, open arms. She held him tightly as if it were the only layer of protection that Richard could never break through. She was tired, and her eyes burned from her salty tears. She hated what Richard had done, but she loved what he had created for her. "But he'll never give that to me. I'm a going to carry around those five years for the rest of my life."

Clark stroked his fingers rhythmically through her curls calming her sobs. "So will I." He muttered faintly.

Lois lifted her chin out of his shirt for a moment. Just long enough to see a flicker of off hurt pass through his eyes. "You don't have to regret those five years at all. You can remember him for what he was. You can love him and the precious memories he gave you. You can be thankful for his efforts. He _really_ did try to change, Lois. I truly believe that."

There was a vibrant, earnest expression on his face. He took in a deep breath and pressed on, "You can appreciate those five years. You can treasure what he gave to Jason. The person you knew Richard to be really was a good man. I was thankful to know that you and Jason had been in such good hands."

Lois listened intently, drinking in every word of comfort and console and he was willing to give.

"But..." He brushed away a single tear down her soft, pasty white cheek. "He's gone now. He's become someone else. Someone that I'm sure he isn't proud of. He's dangerous now, and what he did to you..."

Clark choked on his words and he pulled her closer. She saw a brief shadow of loathing cross his face as searched for the right words. "It was horrible, and I can't imagine what it must feel like for you right now. He... doesn't deserve any forgiveness for it. But you don't have to forgive him. The only thing that you have to do is realize that he's gone, but you'll always have the special moments you spent with him to remember him by."

Lois felt as if her heart were about to burst. Clark had put every ounce of sincerity into his words. "One day, you'll be able to write all of the letters you want to Richard," Clark rested his chin on the top of her head and quietly added, "When he's behind bars."

Lois squeezed her eyes tight shut. His voice washed through her, cleansing her heart of all of the pain she s had suffered from the night in the alley. "Thank you," She mouthed silently. She would have smiled up at him if her tears of relief hadn't completely overpowered her. She didn't have to love Richard, and she didn't have to hate him. What she had with him had been wonderful, and now it was over. And Clark was never going to let him hurt her again. "I think...I'm ready to go home now."

He kissed her forehead lightly and prepared to lift her from the ground when he suddenly froze. His body turned stiff and solid.

"What is it?" She swallowed sharply.

"Stay here," He instructed forcefully, "Don't leave until I come back for you."

"Wait, no, Clark-"

She let his hand escape from her tight grasp and watched him sprint out of the alley around the corner.

She crawled forward a few paces and stood up shakily with a sense of determination welling in her chest.

_I can't lay here forever. _

She narrowed her eyes on the entrance only a few steps away. _Once I walk out of here, I can let it all go._

She sighed deeply and gathered up her pride and marched out of the alley with a triumphant sense of dignity finally starting to pump through her veins again. _It's all over. He can't hurt me anymore._

"Why were you following her?" Her head spun around when she and half of the other pedestrians stopped and stared down the street.

"Clark, what are you _doing_?"

Her jaw dropped in surprise when she saw him firmly pinning a teenage boy, maybe about eighteen, up against the wall. He seized the boy's shoulders firmly as a hostile glare overtook his face.

"What is _this?_" He shoved a thin, jet black cell phone under the boy's nose.

The teenager only replied with a few simple stutters of confusion before Clark slammed him into the wall again. "Why are you taking pictures of her?"

"Chill out, man." The boy responded faintly, "S-some old dude paid me fifty bucks to take a picture of that chick in the alley and text it to that number." He gestured to the phone.

"That's my number." Lois said softly.

"What did he look like?" Clark pressed on, his fingers digging into the boy's shoulders.

"Uh...uh, he was maybe sixty years old. White hair...uh...he had on a green jacket. I don't know..._dude_," The boy cringed as Clark pushed him harder against the wall. "You're killing me, man."

Clark released his grip on the teenager's shoulders and stepped back, "Sorry." He grumbled under his breath.

"Can I go?" The kid shrugged innocently at Clark, pulling a gray hood over his head.

"He didn't say anything else?" Lois piped up.

"Nope. Except that knew you'd be there. Oh...wait..." The boy's eyes buzzed around searching through his brain. "He told me to text you...code 99. Whatever that means..." He trailed off, shoving his hands into his pockets.

Lois sucked in a sharp breath, "That's a military code." Her eyes widened.

"What does it mean?" Clark tossed the teen back his cell phone.

"...It's a bomb threat."

* * *

**I'm so sorry this chapter took me SO long to write. Thanks for the beta, Lilly!**

**I was very surprised to see all of the negative feelings towards Superman 3 and 4. Although I do understand what you meant now. I saw part of third movie and it was just so...cheap. I might sit down and watch them one day. But probably not for a **_**very**_** long time. I would like to say thank you very much for sharing your opinions with me, they cleared up at a lot of questions I had. And thank you for waiting so patiently for this update. I don't know why this one took such a long time.**

**Please leave a review! I am very, very pleased to say that I received the most responses from the last chapter. Thank you for being such wonderful, loyal readers! I'll post the chapter soon.**


	35. A Just cause

**Chapter 35: A Just cause**

Richard White's wary footsteps filled the silent darkness with a soft echo. With a click of the door closing behind him, he dug down into the depths of his pockets for a light. He blinked impatiently while his eyes adjusted to the empty, bleak stillness of the room. His nimble fingers fumbled with a lighter he fished from the bottom of his bleached white lab coat. A tiny flame ignited from the metal cylinder that Richard stretched out in front of him, scanning the contents of the diminutive little dorm. Cobwebs infested every corner and the thick stench of rotting food and mold lingered behind the drywall. The thin, bare walls isolated him from rest of the world. Enclosing him in his own twisted dimension. His warped, cruel thoughts and desires haunting his infected mind. The room was small. Pathetic even. He'd fallen so far from the top. From everything that had sustained him with joy over the last five years. He let it all slip from his fingers. He let her get away. And this was his punishment. Confined to this dark chamber of seclusion. He might as well be in prison. His life had spiralled down from the corner office of the _Daily Planet_, to the corner of the old basement supply room of Metropolis General Hospital. It was cramped, and it was hell trying to get any sleep at night with screaming of sirens blaring several levels above him, but it was enough.

Richard let his gaze rest on his tatty, yellow sleeping bag scrunched up against the side of the wall. The glimmer of a gold handle peeking out towards the light glowing from his pitiful little ember. He let his tongue run across his dry, chapped lips as he took several steps towards the sleeping bag.

_Idiot_, He scolded Aaron's incompetence with a sneer. The handle of the dark, leather briefcase remained exposed for the world to uncover. _I ask him to do one simple thing. Deliver the briefcase to me. He can't even get that right. How the hell does he even manage to tie his shoes every morning?_

Richard knelt down to pull the material over the handle and keep his dirty little masterminding away from the public. At least until channel eight showed up. The tips of his fingers only touched the cold brass handle of the case and he felt a surge of excitement flow through his arm. His heart began to race as he glided his hand along the leather coating of the case. There was something liberating about all of this. That moment of exhilaration would be an experience worth waiting a lifetime for. The mere click of a button would bring half the city to it's knees.

"So, you're still going to go through with it?"

Richard's eyes stretched wide. He felt his heart jump up into his throat in surprise, but he didn't flinch.

"Why wouldn't I?" He replied vaguely, as he listened to the creaking of cautious footsteps sneak forward behind him. "Aaron, if you're here to try and persuade me to-"

"I am not here to persuade you to do anything. I am simply here to present you with the facts." Aaron's calm and collective voice cut through the silence. "But with any luck, I may trigger your conscious. You know, that little voice in the back of your mind that tells you _not _to kill innocent people."

Richard rolled his eyes and reluctantly removed his hypnotized stare away form the briefcase. The orange spark from the lighter cast a dim light on a ripple of deep wrinkles cutting into the face of poorly aging little man who glared sullenly back down at him.

"Say what you want to say, Aaron, but I've already made up my mind."

"I'm here to provide you with a final word of reason, White. There are other ways of doing this."

"This is my way. I've let you do things your way for the past eight months. Look where it's got us. A rat infested cellar. I don't have time for this."

"You'll have nothing but time if you end up in prison. This is an act of irrational impatience, White. You're fully aware of what you're doing, right? You've got a bomb rolled up in you're sleeping bag. You're going to kill thousands of people. You're going to end up behind bars."

"Thank you for that blunt summarization of reality, Doctor." Richard stood up swiftly brushing past the salt and pepper haired elderly man in front of the door. "I let you have your chance. I let you take your pictures. I even got rid of Olsen for you. It's got us nowhere._This_," Richard gestured to the case wrapped up securely in the sleeping bag, "This is what's going to keep me out of jail."

"You should be grateful for this room, White. You are now a wanted fugitive. My career, my life, my family are all on the line. But I'm letting you stay here. You risked _everything_ by going up there and attacking Ms. Lane. Now you're on security camera, and the police are on the look out for you. That was stupid."

"That was necessary. Olsen didn't give the photos to Perry. He needed to be dealt with. And Lois," Richard hesitated while Aaron leaned against the wall, waiting and expecting piteous answer. "I thought she would come with me," Richard swallowed. "I still owe a lot to Luthor. He is my only source of Kryptonite so I need to keep on good terms with him And what Luthor wants is this bomb set off in New Troy and...Jason."

A satisfied smirk of disdain creased the deep lines in the old man's face. "You don't honestly think you have the nerve to just hand over you're family on a silver platter, do you?"

Richard stiffened. His teeth grinding together in annoyance as Aaron's toothy grin grew wider. "They aren't my family anymore." Richard responded coolly, "They never really were. Jason isn't mine. And Lois didn't even have the will to marry me. I don't care what Luthor does to them anymore. I tried to save them. I warned her that he would come after Jason. They aren't my problem anymore."

Aaron shrugged lamely, "Can you blame her? You raped her. You kidnapped her son. You murdered her sister-"

"Lucy Lane's death was a priority. Look, after I took Jason, Lois told Lucy. Everything. Lois didn't want to go to the police yet. Why? I don't know. I suppose she wasn't ready to give up on us yet. Lucy, on the other hand threatened to go to the police unless I turned myself in. I couldn't let her do that."

Aaron nodded, "You told me that you planted a wallet in her apartment. You told me you wiped the place down, White." Aaron lowered his voice, "You told me that you eliminated every shred of evidence that would connect you to Lucy Lane's murder. It was eight months ago, why wasn't the wallet taken into consideration by the police?"

"It was," Richard wiped away a few beads of the sweat dripping down his forehead. "The wallet belonged to an old co-worker of mine at the_ Planet_. He dropped it outside of the warehouse Luthor was stationed in last October. I thought he would be perfect. He was a pretty quiet guy. No one knew very much about him. So I figured he would have spent Christmas alone. No one could have testified otherwise."

"But," Aaron crossed his arms as Richard took in a weary breath.

"But Kent had an airtight alibi. Apparently he spent Christmas with Lois and Jason. I wasn't expecting _that_. So he was cleared of all charges a few months ago."

"Tsk, tsk, White. You're getting sloppy." Richard blinked glassily as he watched Aaron shake his head slowly. "All those years you spent working for Luthor, all those things he taught you, they're finally starting to fade. The past five years with Ms. Lane has weakened your cold heart of stone."

Richard crossed his arms in displeasure. Aaron seemed to be finding his whole predicament amusing.

"Lucy Lane is the least of my troubles now. The police are back on my tail because Kent figured out that Luthor paid me to rape Lois five years ago. They have no proof, but they can get me for-"

"That little performance of yours at the hospital. And the only reason Kent found the trail was because of your allergy, right?" Aaron snorted derisively. "You _had_ to know that story wouldn't fly by the police. That was a foolish mistake on your part, White."

"The only thing you and I can do now is keep a low profile at this hospital for awhile. I'm not ready to go to jail, Aaron."

Aaron chuckled. Mocking his irony , "And you think setting off a bomb in New Troy is going to help you with that? Jesus, White. They're not going to put you in prison they're going to put you in an insane asylum."

"And what will happen to you?" Richard shot back in a sudden blaze. "Someone that has a personal vendetta against Superman won't swing well with the judges either."

Aaron tipped his head slightly, his eyes fixed on Richard with a cold stare. "I'm not like you, White. I still have general consideration for the good of the citizens of Metropolis. New Troy is the largest financial borough in Metropolis. Do you have any idea how many innocent people you're going to kill? I wouldn't set off that bomb if you gave me an entire mountain of Kryptonite. Amanda's death would be in vain if I killed anyone without a just cause."

"Amanda was four, hardly even old enough to know what death is. She's gone, Aaron. And you-"

"That car crash destroyed my family. My son-in-law and daughter are now devoiced, and my grandson is in foster care. The one time that I have ever prayed for anything in my entire life, was to Superman. He should have saved my granddaughter. He didn't. He let us down. He's giving so many people around the world false hope."

Richard shook his head, "And this is what you call a _just cause_? You expected your prayers to be answered, but you put your faith in the wrong person." Richard hurriedly straightened his tie and placed his hand on the door knob. "Superman is not a god."

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**Okay, pretty short chapter. But I'm actually hoping this chapter will clear up a few questions you may have had...or maybe I just made it even more confusing for you? Please let me know!**

**Thanks for my beta Lilly for such a great job! And thank the bad weather! Because we had a snow day today and I probably wouldn't have finished this chapter for a few more days if we hadn't got such a wonderful snow storm!**

**PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW:)!**


	36. Additions

**Grr. This chapter took me forever to type out. I've had it written in my notebook for a week and couldn't find the time to sit down and type! Gr! Actually...I was feeling so guilty and frustrated that I hadn't updated in such a long time, I skipped the entire day of school today to type. XD, okay, call me crazy but school is pretty slow since it's almost the holidays. I wasn't missing much.**

**Anyway...Thanks for the beta job Lilly! Thank you for the WONDERFUL reviews! They're always much loved! I'll try and schedule a time for typing so the updates will be more frequent. Please leave another great review!**

** Edit:This chapter was uploaded twice...Gr. **

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**Chapter 36: Additions**

"_So, you have no idea who could be threatening to detonate this bomb_?"

"No..."

"_And you don't know when this is supposed to happen_?"

"No..."

"_And I don't suppose you happen to know where it's going to go off_?"

"Well...no."

Lois cradled the phone between her neck and shoulder, leafing through the thin pages of the latest issue of the _Gotham Gazette._

"_Look, Ms Lane_," The raspy, impatient, to say the least, male voice of the Metropolis police Chief let out a long sigh. "_We get a lot of tips like this every single day. Now, sine you can't even provide any specific information I'm afraid all we can do is keep an ear open for any other related calls involving this threat."_

"Can't you put a call into the bomb squad? The Mayor? Somebody?"

"_And say what? Do you have any idea how many phoney threats are called in every hour? If we issued a security warning for every single, sick prank the city would be in a constant state of panic. Don't hesitate to call back with more information, but please make sure it's something that may provide assistance to an investigation._"

"But I can-"

"_Good day, Ms. Lane_."

Lois groaned when the line went dead. She threw herself on the couch and let the newspapers scatter on the floor. She slammed her palm down on the snooze button on the blaring little alarm clock.

_6:00am_, the blinking red digital numbers flashed tauntingly. She'd been up since two. With a grand total of exactly three and a half hours of sleep, on and off. But she couldn't expect herself t rest. Not with anxious ball of dread rolling around in the pit of her stomach. She was restless, and the disturbing premonition of a bomb threat was gnawing away at her thoughts. The police certainly didn't give her much comfort. Although, she would admit that her lack of information about the threat wasn't particularly beneficial. She couldn't help but feel the sharpest tinge of guilt. She was tucked away nicely in the middle of Gotham and out of target range.

_There must be something we can _do.

Clark had spent the last few hours searching the city for any sign of suspicion. But even his keen senses weren't picking up anything out of the ordinary.

"It's no good," He had reported glumly several hours earlier, "Whoever sent that message is either a mute, or has locked themselves away in a sound-proof, lead walled room.

_There has got to be something we're _missing_ here..._

Lois crossed her arms sullenly and leaned her head against the dusty, glass window of her apartment. Her eyes peeked out between the thin blinds as a golden ray of the early morning sunrise beamed down on the city.

_If someone was going to set off a bomb why would they tell me about it ahead of time? If this was just some sick prank, why bother with a military code?_

Lois tapped the end of her pen against her teeth pensively. She scribbled down a few drabbles about what they had found.

_Code 99_

_Lead and sound proof room_

_Time of message received 2:23_

_Elderly man_

_White hair_

Things just weren't adding up. There weren't enough pieces yet. She needed more.

Lois's head shot up in alarm when an alarming thump on her door caught her attention. She put down her notebook and cautiously approached the newly replaced door, since Jason's little accident.

She hesitated before turning the door knob while pressing her ear against the wood. "Who is it?" She called warily.

"Lois, is that you?" Came a low mumbled response.

"Uh..." She mumbled anxiously. "Who's there-?"

"Just open the damn door, Lane."

There was something oddly familiar about the impatient, gruff grunt from the other side of door.

_No way..._She recalled in a moment of disbelief._Oh, crap._

There was an unbearable tugging at the corner of her mouth. Her lips formed into a crooked smile. With a pinch of amusement and hint of surprise, she grabbed a hold of the door knob. Throwing her hesitance aside, Lois swung the door open and was greeted with a very sullen, petulant expression.

"Perry," Her eyes widened slightly. She hadn't seen him in nearly six months but he was almost unrecognizable. It was as if he was a whole different person.

There was a thin solemn frown creasing the deep lines on his face. A weary, faded, shallow hint of blue colored his sorrowful eyes. He looked as if he had aged another twenty years. His face was a ghostly, colorless pale, as if he hadn't seen the sun all summer. His arms were slumped to his sides and his shoulders hunched down drearily. This was a side of Perry White she had never seen before. He appeared as a defeated old man that had lost everything. And she was completely lost for words.

"H-hi," She stammered quietly while still scanning Perry's distasteful, electric blue windbreaker with astonishment. "What are you doing here-?"

"Kent," Perry uttered in a faint whisper. "Told me everything, Lois. Everything."

She narrowed her eyes hesitantly for a moment, "_Everything?"_She repeated carefully. Unsure of what Perry's definition of what everything was.

"About you and Richard," Perry helped her along, "And about...your...uh-" He shifted uncomfortably before Lois stepped aside and guided him by one arm to her living room. "Well, about what happened to you in the alley." Perry lowered his voice, "About what Richard did to you."

Lois froze. _That's _why Perry seemed so uncharacteristically distraught. He'd just found out that Richard, his nephew, had committed so many brutal acts of cruelty on his family.

"My little Rich," Perry choked on his words, "He's a kidnapper, he's a rapist and he's a murderer."

He took her hands and clutched them tightly, "Lois, I am so sorry for what he's done. I-I just..."

Perry trailed off, sinking down into her couch when his legs almost seemed to crumple underneath him. Still grasping her hands warmly he added, "If I had known...what he did...if I had known that he was harming you and Jason I would have done something. I would have-"

Lois shook her head and interrupted, "It's nobody's fault, Perry. Nobody would have seen through Richard. You couldn't have done anything."

Perry nodded in agreement, but not completely convinced. "I didn't believe it at first. But it's all pretty obvious isn't it? Kent said that I deserved to know, and he showed me everything he gathered on Richard. Told me what he did to you and Olsen in the hospital." He let out a disgusted scoff, "There's no hard evidence on him yet? In the alley?"

"No," Lois answered bluntly, letting her hands fall from Perry's grip, "Not yet anyway."

"How's Jason taking all of this?" Perry inclined with deep concern in his voice.

"I haven't exactly...I mean, Jason doesn't..."

"You haven't told him? Doesn't he ask questions?"

Lois bit her lower lip hesitantly. It felt so strange and awkward talking about all of this with Perry. There was still a strong part of her that pretended as if it were all just a bad dream. Talking about it made it real.

"I think there's a part of Jason that already knows that Richard isn't coming back." She explained slowly, "I think he'll be alright thought. Clark is here."

She cast her eyes downwards when Perry studied her face curiously.

"Since when does Kent find the time to get all the way out to Gotham?"

"Uh..." Her mind frantically searched for an answer, "He comes down on the train on weekends." This was a little harder than she thought. Their stories would always have to be in sync. And right now she prayed that Clark didn't put in a lot of extra hours at the _Planet _on weekends.

"Oh, I see." Perry nodded dismissively. "You and Kent...you're not still engaged or...whatnot?"

"No," She didn't hesitate to answer, "We are sort of...taking it slow...I think."

Lois hadn't really had time to even think about her relationship status. She knew she loved Clark, and she knew he loved her back, but that was pretty much it. She'd been too overwhelmed to let anything serious re-kindle between them.

"Anyway," She was eager to get past the subject. "How are things at the _Planet_?"

"A fine lot better than you." Perry let his eyes wander freely along the walls of the cramped, little sitting area. "I can't imagine you must be very comfortable here, Lois. This isn't exactly Buckingham palace."

"I'm sort of...job hunting," She smiled back weakly.

"Uh-huh, and you couldn't get a job at the _Gotham Gazette_? I bet they would hire you in a snap."

"They did," Lois couldn't stifle a low grumble. "But the first question they asked me during the interview, after seeing my name was, _'So, how is your relationship with Superman going?'_ All they saw in me was a big fat _S _taped to my forehead. Nobody would hire me unless I was willing to write about Superman."

"And that's a problem?"

She glared back at him, "Well it was then," But slowly tilted her head, pondering the subject carefully, "I suppose it's not so much now. But I don't feel like a real reporter anymore, Perry. I feel like a groupie writing a monthly fan club newsletter when I write about him." She sighed, and rolled her eyes at Perry's cunning little grin. The more she complained the wider it spread until he was practically beaming ear-to-ear with delight.

"Don't look at me like that," She shot back a cold, rebellious glare as if she could read his mind, "I'm perfectly happy in my...simple and peaceful little environment." She defended herself confidently. "Besides, I do have something to pay the bills."

"Oh really," Perry let a satisfied smirk cross his lips. "What have you been doing?"

"Freelancing," She replied with a little too much pride in her voice.

"Freelancing?" Perry mocked with a chuckle.

"Yes. Under a different name for the _Gazette _and_ Metropolis Star_. It's...enjoyable."

"And I'm sure you'll sore to high places in the freelancing business," Perry couldn't help but chuckle a little harder. "But you know, I'm here. And willing to put another offer on the table."

"Oh," Lois crossed her arms as if she still had some dignity left to cling on to. "And what would that be?"

"You, come back to the _Planet_, for the same salary and still write about Superman."

"That is not an-"

"But," Perry held up his hand to keep her quiet, "I will make an effort to give you a broader range of other non-super related topics every so often. How's that sound?"

Lois said nothing for a moment. There was a glint of satisfaction in Perry's eyes again. The one that Lois could only recognize as the spark of victory. "It's completely up to you. You can stay here, rotting away in your apartment, freelancing under a name like Eleanor Wong and never have the opportunity to even dream of a Pulitzer again. Or, you can be one of the best damn reporters in Metropolis."

Perry stood up slowly and put his hands on his hips as if he had already decided for her, "What's it going to be?"

* * *

"Wow," Lois tilted her head, "It's...really not all _that_ bad." 

"It looks like a giant took a bite out of the roof!" Jason let go of his mother's hand and bounded towards the barn, the only building on the Kent farm still standing solid. At least, more so than the house.

"Well," Lois placed her hand on Clark's shoulder to offer some sort of comfort. "It looked far worse on the news. At least half of the house seems okay. I mean look...the kitchen is still there..."

Clark lightly kicked at the debris from the storm. The entire plot was a massive disaster zone that he had once called home.

"I managed to dig out a lot of my dad's old photos. But as for my mother's good china...and my entire bedroom..."

"Couldn't you rebuild it?" Lois suggested with a shrug.

"I could," Clark answered while still staring at the rubble. "But then I would have to explain why the house magically rebuilt itself overnight." He shook his head, "Nope, this time I think I'll just leave it to the professionals."

"What about your mother?"

"She'll stay in Metropolis for while. She's having a pretty hard time though. Especially since Ben's funeral last week."

Lois fell silent. There before her feet was an endless pile of shattered remains that once formed the walls of a well aged and traditional country cottage. The Kent's house. What was once a sturdy, solid structure filled with warmth and memories was now a rickety, crumbling shack on a heap of glass and drywall.

"This house has been in my family for generations," Clark mused aloud, his bright blue eyes scanning the little hovel as if he were looking through a lifetime of memories. "My mother can't sell it now. I don't think she ever really wanted to in the first place."

"Well, with a little paint, and a few more walls," Lois chirped with an overly optimistic tone, "It wouldn't be so bad. In fact, maybe it would be the perfect opportunity to make a few more...modern improvements."

"Improvements," Clark nodded with a small smile, "I don't know. I was thinking more along the lines of...additions."

"Well, whatever. I just think that maybe your mother would like a new..." Lois trailed off. She gazed up at Clark with a peculiar eye when his smile grew wider. "Wait," Her buoyant frame of mind faded, "What do you mean by _additions_?"

"I think I'm going to buy the farm from my mother." Clark clarified, as if he'd already made up his mind. "Wouldn't you like Jason to have his own one-hundred acre backyard to play on?"

"J-Jason," She stuttered uncertainly. "Do you mean...you want us to...?"

"You could move here." Clark finished meekly.

_Move in with him? _Lois let her eyes stretch wide, slightly taken aback. "Clark," She said his name slowly. Somewhat unsure of how to respond. "That's a very...generous and wonderful offer..._but_," She watched his hopeful face fall and his eyes suddenly drop to the ground. She couldn't help but suddenly feel a slight tug of temptation in her heart. "But I just think it may be a little too soon. I mean...we haven't even..." She trailed off as her face started to feel hot and her eyes darted about anxiously. "_You know_."

"Oh," Clark clued in suddenly. "Lois, you don't have to think of it that way. I just thought since you took your job back at the _Planet_, and you don't exactly have anywhere to go...and Jason has been put through so much. I thought you might want to stay out in the open...with...me...for awhile." There it was. That shy, bashful side sneaking past his confident exterior. It took every ounce in her body to resist from throwing herself into his arms.

"You would be willing to take us back and froth everyday from work, and school and groceries, and sick days...and forgotten lunches, and whatever?"

Clark shrugged. "Why not? This area is very private. I thought that it would be good for Jason to grow up on. There's so much open space. It would be perfect for him to develop his abilities here." He lowered his head in embarrassment, but Lois could only grin back.

_I have to move on. _She let herself take several steps forward and wrap her arms around his torso. _ It's my turn to make the next move. I have to be willing to let it happen._

"I suppose," She whispered quietly, not wanting to break the fragile moment between them. "That Jason really will need a lot of room for you to teach him everything. It would make things easier..."

She watched his face brighten with delight. "Really? I mean...I don't want to put any pressure on you, Lois...if you feel uncomfortable with it then-"

She stood up on her tip toes and planted a soft kiss on his lips to silence him.

_I want to make this work. _

"Lois," Clark pulled away suddenly, loosing his gentle hold around her waist. His face went dark as he raised his head up towards the sky. "It's happening." He muttered quietly. A quick sense of urgency flowed through his voice.

"What? Do you hear the..." She felt her heart beginning to pound hard in her chest. "The bomb? Where?"

"Metropolis. In the middle of New Troy."

Lois mentally kicked herself.

_New Troy! Of course! The largest business borough in Metropolis!_

She knew that at this time of day there would be thousands of people down there. Another bolt of shock rattled through her body when she recalled the conversation she'd had earlier that day with the General.

"Clark, there is a G-8 meeting in New Troy today." She told him breathlessly. "Some of the leaders from the most powerful countries in the world will be there!'

Clark's eyes widened in horror. "I'll be back for you. There's a farmhouse a couple of minutes down the road. Take Jason and phone the police."

"I want to go too!" She protested firmly. "If the person doing this responsible for all of the photographs then I want to-"

Clark shook his head, "I am _not_ taking you there." He replied assertively. She watched him take off into the sky without another word. His clothes sprawled across the green grass. Lois let out an irritated groan to the clouds.

_Maybe, this is going to be a little harder than I thought._

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**So, what do you think of Perry's reaction to Richard? Like the idea of Lois and Clark moving in to the old Kent house? Please leave a review and let me know!**


	37. Temptation

**So did everyone have a Happy Holiday? Christmas was awesome! I was very happy to get Lois and Clark Season 2! Yay! New Year's was great too. In case anyone is interested, I wrote a New Year's Eve Clois Oneshot "Here comes the sun." I posted it, so go read when your done this chapter :) Please leave a review!**

**Thanks for the great beta work, Lilly!**

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**Chapter 37: Temptation**

Richard White's pair of emerald green eyes floated up and down the sea of raging traffic ahead of the cab.

The hot, sticky late summer air mixed with the downtown New Troy clouds of vile toxins spilling out from the dozens of fuming exhaust pipes poisoned the city with a thick, foggy brown haze.

Mid-day, downtown in the largest financial borough in Metropolis. The city was at it's peak. Hundreds of the most well respected, intelligent minds of the city walked carelessly along the streets with a cell phone stuck in one ear, an earphone stuck in another. They filled the giant, looming skyscrapers towering above, conducting all sorts of productive business deals both over and under the table. Some of them were even in the next car, shouting and cursing impatiently at the vehicles ahead, their blood pressure rising at an immense speed. Anyone that could afford to send three kids off to Harvard, pay for a five star hotel while on vacation in Hawaii, and own a second white picked fence, Victorian style mansion in Tuscany, was here.

Everyone that mattered to the city was here.

It was all too perfect. Too perfect to assume that he would get away with it. He probably wouldn't. It was just too easy.

Losing half of the population of Metropolis was only a dent compared to what kind of utter chaos he was about to unleash on the rest of the world, thanks to the G-8 meeting. Eight of the most powerful and influential countries of the world were about to loose eight of the most valued and intelligent leaders all in one shot. This tiny half a handful of people would cause shock, and crises in the event of their deaths. If even one were lost, the media would chew on the story like candy. Richard couldn't even imagine what it would be like if eight were lost all in one swift moment of time. This would go down in history as one of the most tragic events in world. This would be printed in textbooks for high school students to learn and reflect upon seventy years from now. If he was caught, his name would be forever tarnished and despised.

But it didn't matter. Luthor had planned this so perfectly that it seemed to be flawless

Richard's hands trembled uncontrollably. It was all so twisted and sick, yet there was something exhilarating about the whole idea. There was a constant battle of nerves, and morality duking it out against excitement and greed. Whether it was right or wrong didn't matter. It wouldn't affect him as long as he stuck to the plan.

Richard looked down at the chocolate brown, leather case weighing down heavily on his lap. His tense, pale and twitching fingers fiddled anxiously with the sparkling, golden handle that reflected a sharp glare of the afternoon sun back into his eyes. This was his package. This was the deadly case that was going to be responsible for so much damage. This was going to kill thousands of people. And it was small enough to bundle up in a common inanimate everyday briefcase. Only he knew of the sweltering streak of hell that would soon be let loose the on innocent, unsuspecting citizens of Metropolis once activated.

The worst thing about Luthor's plan was how suspiciously simple it was. Nobody would stop him. Nobody would even check him. He wouldn't even need to face security. The blast would be big enough so that he didn't even need to be in the same building with the other executive politicians filing up the stairs and being swept into the everlasting luxuries of one of golden towers of Metropolis. The Emperor building.

"The heat finally starting to get to you?"

Richard's head shot up. The crooked, coffee-stained toothy grin of the cab driver greeted him. As Richard wiped away what seemed like a river of sweat dripping down his forehead, he gave the driver a brief nod and turned his gaze out the filthy, dusty window.

"I don't know why you big business people insist on wearing those monkey suits." The driver focused his attention back on the sluggish, pace of the traffic ahead. "No offence, but I don't think a black suit makes them look anymore intelligent or whatnot. All it does is set up a target panel for the sun. Seriously, you ought to make a complaint. You're sweating buckets, man."

As the driver continued to make snide remarks about his suit, Richard slowly slipped the briefcase down to his feet. _It's now or never._ He was quick to make sure the driver was still preoccupied with the traffic ahead. He laid the briefcase flat on the floor and nudged it discreetly under the seat ahead of him.

After he was sure that the driver hadn't noticed any change, he slipped a thin black cell phone out of his jacket pocket and flipped it open. His fingers were almost entirely out of his control with panic. He was tempted to let them tremble away from the key panel and close the phone again. This was the point of no return. Once he hit those keys, the timer on the bomb would begin. He would have exactly ten minutes to get out of New Troy if he wanted to escape with his life.

_Just do it. You'll be fine. The helicopter isn't far. If you don't do this, you'll be hiding for the rest of your life. If you want immunity, you have to be willing to fight for it..._

He closed his eyes tightly, and clicked the keys _G8._ He had ten precious minutes.

The first part of the plan was complete. Just too easy.

"You can pull in here," Richard croaked. There was a swelling lump in his throat that made his voice go hoarse. They were right outside the Emperor building. The media were swarmed around the outskirts of the building. The security men were completely distracted with the mob of bloodthirsty reporters. No one would notice him. Not if he moved quickly. He handed the driver a few bills and promised, "I will be back in five minutes. Wait for me and they'll be a huge tip in it for you."

The driver nodded at his instructions, "No problem."

Richard climbed out of the car with haste. Every second counted. He stepped lightly, hurrying towards the building across the street. Eight minutes and counting, he glanced at his watch. Plenty of time.

Luthor's men had set up a helicopter on top of the Metropolis WGBS-TV station. It was simple. Get in, flash the press pass, and get to the roof. All in eight minutes.

Richard could feel his heart fluttering wildly in his chest. He thought as though he might collapse in the street. But he could see the doors ahead, only steps away. Every organ in his quivering body protested, but he strode on. _Get it together, White. It's almost over._

He halted outside the doors of the T.V station to straighten himself out. It was all about confidence. If he looked the part, he'd have no problem.

Richard grabbed a hold of the handle on the door and felt the cool rush of the air conditioned lobby refresh his senses. Seven minutes. He treaded across the lobby to the circular, mahogany desk of a young looking woman wrestling with the curly, spiralling of a landline telephone in one hand and a cell phone in the other. Richard couldn't have asked for anyone better.

"Uh...y-your name please, Sir?" The woman must have been new. She took both phones away for her for a moment to address him.

"Richard White." He gave her a brief glance at his fake Atlantic City press pass, "I'm here for the job interview with John Byrne." Patient grin plastered on his face, press pass, snazzy suit, there was no doubt she would buy it.

"Oh...right." The woman seemed flustered with the voices shirking out of both telephones. She gave him a wave after inspecting his pass for a moment, "Just go on up." She gestured to the elevator before returning to both phones, "Ninth floor."

"Thank you." He flashed her another smile. The elevator was already open, waiting for him to step inside. He gave the button with the number 40 a quick push. The highest floor. The elevator doors closed with a swoosh.

Richard snuck another quick peek at his watch. Six minutes. All he had to do was get to the copter and take off.

_You did it. _Richard praised himself with silent congratulations. There was nothing that could stop him now. He was in. And the deal he struck with Luthor was met. Luthor would keep him out of jail. Keep him safe. And with all the millions of dollars in cash needed for his every whim.

When the elevator doors finally slid open Richard was met with an empty storage room. He quickly jogged across the carpet, past the shelves and shelves of camera equipment to the flight of stairs on the other side. His feet moved quicker with every step and his heart was ready to explode. He threw all of his weight against the large metal doors that separated him from the helicopter waiting to take him to freedom at last. _Thank God it's all over._

Richard felt the sigh of relief flow out between his lips as if someone had hit the release switch on him.

Everything was going to be perfect from now on.

Richard only took a few steps forward out into the sunlight again. His feet pounded against the pavement of the landing pad as he came to a sudden halt. There was no intense wind from the copter hitting his face. There were no voices of relief shouting at him to climb aboard. Richard gasped sharply. A sick sense of horror took over his excitement. There was no helicopter.

Instead, out in the middle of the landing pad, the sunlight streamed down onto the vibrant set of primary colors that the world could only recognize as a quick flash of hope dashing over the bright blue sky. But to Richard, these colors sent a shivering chill of dread down his spine. Superman, stood tall and proud with the skyscrapers surrounding the landing pad, waiting for Richard's next move.

* * *

Clark narrowed his eyes on Richard. The man seemed stiff with shock. Frozen to the spot. He'd been beaten. He'd lost and now he was going to pay. 

Clark was relieved that the bomb could be easily taken care of now. But somewhat disappointed. He wouldn't have guessed that Richard could have fallen so far. Quick flashes of memories soared through Clark's mind. Jason's kidnapping, Lucy's murder, Jimmy's coma, Lois's rape, the man responsible for so much of the pain in their lives was standing right before him now. Practically begging to be hurled off the roof. There was searing anger welling up inside Clark's chest that he had never felt before. Richard had managed to do so much damage around him, to the people that he loved most. For so many months, Clark could only sit helplessly with guilt as everyone suffered under Richard's violent crimes. All of them have risked their lives to protect Clark and his secret.

Clark could stand it no longer. This was going to end _now._

He marched forward towards Richard. He watched Richard spin around and head back for the doors. Clark took in mighty breath and before Richard could grab the handle, they had been frozen shut by the icy blast.

Richard didn't give up. He pounded and kicked the doors, shouting and pleading for help. He didn't dare turn to face Clark. He knew that he was in trouble. Clark gave him a quick scan and searched his suit for any trace of the radioactive, glow of green. Richard didn't even have a shard.

"There's nowhere to go, Richard."

Richard stopped beating at the doors. His shoulders heaved up and down as he took in long, heavy breaths of panic. There was something infuriating just watching Richard. Clark felt the whispers of temptation in his mind. Richard was just standing there. Just waiting to be attacked. Clark was using every fibre in his body to resisted doing just that.

Clark didn't have the time to speak with Richard. He knew the only way he was going to get the location of the bomb out of Richard was with sheer force. Just as Richard began to turn around to face his opponent, Clark lunged at Richard and threw him up against the icy metal doors. He held Richard firmly. He winced as Clark pressed down on his shoulders. It would be so easy to just finish him off here. No one would know. No one would care. Richard was a threat to the city. A threat to the President of the United States. Surely the rest of the world would understand why Superman was faced with no other choice...

Clark's grip tightened around Richards arms; he could feel the bone beginning to crack under the pressure. The more he squeezed, and the longer he stared into Richard's cold, selfish, eyes of greed, the more he was tempted to just keep crushing. This man, Richard White, Jason's adoptive father, Lois's fiancé, was at Clark's mercy. He thought of all of the people Richard had betrayed, all the people he hurt. He thought of Jimmy, lying helplessly in the hospital, unlikely to ever even wake up again. He thought of Jason, the innocent little boy that he cared so for so much, until one day he was abandoned. He shattered Jason's world. Jason was never going to see his father again.

But what sickened Clark most, was the thought of Lois, pinned to the ground in the alleyway, kicking and shouting for Superman. She did_ nothing _to deserve that. None of them did.

"You listened to her screams," Clark's voice shook with fury as he spoke, "You ignored her. You just kept going. You had the nerve to raise her child, you had the nerve to come into her house every night and act like you deserved it. Act like you loved her." Clark knew he was on the brink of time. Another minute and New Troy would be nothing but a pile of ash and rubble. "_You_ had the family that I was _supposed_ to have. Do you have any idea what I would have given for that?" Richard's vacant expression didn't change. This man didn't even have a conscious. He was staring at death in the eye and he didn't feel an ounce of remorse for what he'd done to them. He didn't even appreciate the family that Clark would have done anything for. He didn't deserve them. He didn't deserve to even waste another precious breath of air. He wanted so much to deny him from that. The temptation was almost too much for him. "Give me _one_ good reason why I should let you live?"

Richard's lips parted slowly, he was shaking and sweating, he struggled to take in a ragged breath under the crushing weight Clark compressed down onto his chest. "If you kill me," Richard began to choke out before he gasped for another stinging breath, "She'll _hate _you."

Clark's hard stare became locked with Richard's. He wanted so much to take all of the pain away from her, away from Jimmy and Jason. No matter how much he hated to admit it to himself, Richard was right. It would only give them all more pain. Lois would never forgive him. She had suffered long enough with a murderer. Long enough with evil. Clark wasn't going to be the one to do that to her again. Richard's death would only bring more agony for her.

"You tell me where that bomb is, or you _will_ die here along with the rest of New Troy, under your own foolish actions, not mine."

Beads of sweat poured down Richard's face like it was raining. He struggled for air, his face was turning pale, and he knew he was pressed for time. The bomb would go off any second.

"The taxi," Richard whispered dryly.

Clark didn't remove his burning stare. He knew he didn't have any time left to decide whether or not Richard was telling the truth. He reluctantly released his fierce death grip on Richard's shoulder's and against his chest. Richard fell into a crumpled heap on the ground, desperately gasping for air. He wasn't going anywhere. He'd be back for Richard later.

Clark didn't waste another second. He raced to the edge of the rooftop and gazed down at the street, scanning for anything that he _couldn't_ see through.

Bingo. The bright yellow taxi, parked on the curb below was unknowingly carrying a solid square package, outlined with led. Richard's wasn't completely stupid after all.

He dived down towards the cab. He swung open the back door while the driver spun around in his seat and shouted in protest. Clark reached under the seat and clutched the gold handle. He yanked the briefcase out it's hiding place. A few people gawked and stared at his sudden appearance. But he didn't have time to explain. This bomb had seconds. He tucked the briefcase safely under his arm and bolted up into the sky without a single word.

* * *

**Well, I know a lot of you have been waiting for Richard to finally get caught. What do you think? Please leave a review!**


	38. Scrabble

**:) Thanks for all the wonderful reviews! They make my day! I'm not entirely sure how long it will be until I update again because of exams next week. But I'll keep working on it in my head at least. I'm glad you all liked the last chapter so much. I've got tons of new ideas and surprises for you guys in this fic, so keep checking in ;)**

**Thanks for the beta, Lilly!**

* * *

_**Chapter 38: Scrabble**_

"Right this way, Ms. Lane." Warden Brown's deep voice was like a violent rumble through Lois's dark thoughts. The moment she'd drove in through the tall, intimidating coiled rail fences of the New Troy Metropolis prison gates, her thoughts had been spiralling down into a shadowy frame of mind.

Warden Brown gestured for her to follow. Lois treaded meekly behind him down the gloomy, narrow corridor with the flickering fluorescent lights barely radiating a faint glow down the passage.

"You have ten minutes." The Warden grunted as he escorted her into the confided space at the end of the hall. She stepped tentatively into the room, scanning the grimy surrounding walls. There was an icy chill that slithered up her spine. The room was cold and empty. There was nothing but a cool, steel table located in the center of the room accompanied by two chairs, placed at both ends. A sliver of uncertainty stabbed at her nerves. As she slowly sunk down into the freezing, steel chair and collected her bearings, she noticed a solid, heavy door on the opposite wall. She stared hard at it as a tickle of fear feathered her heart. At any moment, Richard White was going to walk through that door.

There was a part of her that wanted to take the easy way out and deliver her message through a letter, a phone call or some other means of communication that didn't require her to have to gaze back into his familiar green eyes without screaming. But she needed to do this for herself. She knew that only a face to face confrontation with this man would be the only way to deliver the news.

_Oh God, please let him buy this. _She prayed silently as she rolled her fist into a tight ball, a single sheet of paper folded unevenly into a tatty, crinkled square clenched in the palm of her firm clasp.

Richard had carelessly thrown away whatever affection she had left for him after she watched Clark, drag Richard down from the Emperor building with cell phone detonator in hand, on television. The police raced him into custody. Richard's name was plastered on every newsstand across the country. His face was on every television network in the world. In only one week, Richard's name had become infamous in every country on the earth. Notorious, for his attempt to blow up the Emperor building, The President of the United States, seven other world leaders, and half of Metropolis. He was locked away in prison at the drop of a hat. His case wouldn't go to court for three more months. Superman had already agreed to testify. Richard was going away for life. She knew that, but still somehow managed to find an ounce of pity for him. He was never going to see Jason again, and after today, he wouldn't see her again either. It was her duty to deliver the results. After everything he'd done, Lois believed that even he still deserved to know the hard, cruel truth.

"When the guard said I had a visitor, I thought it would be my lawyer."

Lois closed her eyes for a brief second. Once she opened them, she knew that Richard would never be the same man to her again. The envision of the sweet, irresistible prince charming that he once was, would be lost to her forever.

She listened to the scrape of the chair legs against the floor as Richard pulled out his seat to join her. She could only listen to the rattle of his cuffs clanging together as he folded his hands on the table before her.

There was nothing separating them. There was nothing to protect him from the harsh, paining words that she knew he was going to spit at her. There was no shield to hide behind. Only the table. Her sister's killer, the man in the shadows stalking her in the alleyway, her rapist, was sitting right across the table.

She at last found the strength to open her eyes. She didn't have any expectations of what she would see. Just a broken man with nothing else to give her. His face was stiff, and his eyes were empty. He was dressed in the formal orange jumpsuit that unified him with the other criminals. He was pale, and there were dark drooping black bags weighing down his eyes. His appearance was ragged and worn, Lois actually found herself trying to suppress a tinge of sympathy back down her throat with a hard swallow. There was still something restless about him. A certain ray of hope fell from his expression. There was no guilt, no remorse, no sense of shame, just hope. As if he knew something she didn't. As if the harsh reality that he was never going to see the light of day again still hadn't settled in yet.

"Do you have something to say to me, Lois?" Richard inquired with a tolerant sigh after only a few seconds of the uneasy silence that divided the two sides of the room in half.

"I came to ask you something." Lois forced her lips to move, not entirely sure of what she was saying. "I wanted to know if my sister had said anything to you before you murdered her.'

Richard seemed taken aback at the question, "You still think I had anything to do with Lucy?"

He shook his head, still playing with his startled act of surprise, "What reason would I have to-"

"I don't know." Lois shot hotly. "And I don't care why you did it. I just want to know if she said anything to you." Lois found herself beginning to tremble with rage, "There's no use playing this game with me, Richard. You can deny it all you want to the rest of the world. I don't care. I just want to know what she said."

His solemn exterior did not change. "I don't know, Lois. But..." Richard curled his finger motioning her to lean in to the middle of the table. "If I were in her position, I _probably_ would have been begging for my life." His lips hissed the words in her ear slowly, "She _probably_ would have screamed for help, she _probably_ would have raced to the door, she _probably_ would have fell down on her knees and plead to be spared, she_ probably_ would have confessed that she knew the identity of her sister's rapist, and she_ probably_-"

"_Stop_ it," Lois pulled away quickly before Richard could utter another dark word. "That's why you killed her?" Lois felt hot tears welling up in her eyes. "She knew you did it? She found proof, didn't she? She found the evidence that would have convicted you of rape." Her lower lip trembled at the thought of her sister on the ground at Richard's feet, just screaming for help. Just hoping that a miracle man might fly through her window, just like for her big sister. "_My_ rape."

Richard fell back against his chair, "_You_ asked." He shrugged.

"Did Luthor pay you to rape me? Did he pay you to invade my life and pretend that you cared for five years? Did he pay you to go to Jason's piano recitals? Did he pay you to come after Jason and I on the _Gertrude_? Did he pay you to drive me to the hospital to see Superman?!" Lois was practically screaming by the time she finished her sentence. She was fuming, with tears dripping down her cheeks like a fountain. Why couldn't he just show something? Some amount of remorse. Just to know that he missed what they had created. Just to know that it all just wasn't an act.

"Do you really want to know that, Lois?" Richard replied barely above a whisper.

That was her answer. Her heart sank. She could hardly see his hunched over outline anymore. Her tears smudged the bright colors of his jumpsuit with the icy, steel table. "No," She answered finally, "I guess I don't." She refused to let him take the handful of wonderful memories that she did have away. It was all she had left of her life. He didn't have the right to wreck that too.

"I have something for you," She raised her fist across the table and released her grip around the crumpled little fold of paper. "Read it."

Richard's jaw tightened. He shifted in his chair while inspecting the paper uneasily for a moment. "No."

"Why not?" Lois spat harshly, "Are you afraid that I might have a little power to destroy your life too?"

"I don't care, Lois. I'm only here because-"

"It's the paternity test results." She cut him off sharply. No more of his cruel tactics. It was her turn.

"You took a paternity test?" Richard scoffed with an amused smile, "Why in the-"

"He's not Superman's son." Lois was pleased when she saw Richard's grin fade. Instead his face fell back into a stone mould.

"You're lying...he's not _my_..." He reached forward and snatched up the paper. He scrambled to unfold it while Lois continued.

"No. He's not yours either." _Be brave, Lane. He'll buy it. _She told herself confidently. "He's Clark's."

Richard suddenly became mesmerized by the paper. His mouth fell open when his own eyes were able to confirm the results. "As in _Kent_?" Richard's pierced back into her own. "That's a lie-"

"It's the truth Richard." Lois could practically feel the heat from his intense stare.

"You _told _me that Jason threw the piano. You _told_ me that he-"

"I was wrong." Lois felt her body turn rigid. This wasn't going to be easy. "We hit some rough water on the _Gertrude_. The piano wasn't secured properly to the floor. When the waves hit, the piano broke loose and slid into the Luthor's man."

Richard's skin had turned to a ghostly white, "That is bull. I saw Jason use heat vision. He lit my arm on fire-"

"It wasn't Jason." Lois shook her head. "It was Superman."

"You're lying. I can-"

"_Think_ about it, Richard! Did you really _see _Jason use heat vision? Are you _sure_ it couldn't have been Superman?"

Richard was speechless. He tripped over his tongue for the right words, unable to come to a reasonable conclusion. "B-but you...and Clark?"

"Before he left on his trip." She nodded slowly. "It was just a stupid mistake-"

"This is bullshit!" Richard flared. She braced herself and took in a sharp breath when Richard suddenly rose from his chair in a rage. "Lois, you are nothing but dirty little-"

"I'm_sorry_, Richard! I really am! But you..." Lois stopped. She found it odd that Richard never reacted so strongly to anything else she said. Not about Lucy, not about the alley, only about Jason. Why would he care that Jason wasn't Superman's son?

Because he was planning on exposing it to the world. Claiming that he knew Jason's true Kryptonian

heritage. He planned on telling the media, and maybe that might influence his trail. Maybe he thought he could strike up some sort of deal for the information. But now that Lois had proof that Jason wasn't Superman's, thanks to _Photoshop _editing, he would only sound like a crazy lunatic spouting off. That was the only reasonable conclusion she could come to, anyway.

"We're done here." Richard took his anger out on the table with a swift kick, "Don't come back, Lois. Just leave me alone."

Lois couldn't restrain a soft sob, "Was it worth it? Was it worth giving up on us?"

Richard scanned her with a disgusted snare, "I'm not the one who threw it away, Lois. You did. The moment you decided your flying fantasy was more important that your family."

* * *

"_P-L-A-N-E-T_! Planet!" Jason beamed back proudly as he placed the final _T _letter tile on the pink double world score square on the game board. "Just like the _Daily Planet, _right, Mr. Clark?" 

"That's right," Clark tipped his head while staring at his own set of letters, still not quite sure what word he could make with _X,U,Y,A,S, O _and _Z. _"How many points do you have?"

"Forty-two." Jason replied with a snicker, "Don't worry, Mr. Clark. You might catch up...at least you have more points than Mommy usually gets."

"I don't think _Scrabble_ would be her favorite game." Clark agreed slowly.

"No," Jason shook his head and grinned, "She's _terrible_."

"Ah-ha," Clark triumphantly placed his _Y _tile underneath the letters _T _and _O._ "Now how many points did _Toy _earn me?"

Jason paused to the count out six more points on his fingers. "Twelve."

As Jason began to inspect his tiles carefully for his next turn, Clark diverted his attention away from the _Scrabble_ board for a moment. His ears picked up a soft sob and a frustrated groan as he pictured Lois standing outside the door, fumbling furiously with her set of jingling keys. Her breaths were short and raspy. The conversation with Richard must not have gone very well, as he expected.

"You're Mom is home now, Jason. I'm going to go let her in. You keep trying to figure out what we can put beside that _Y _tile on the end."

Clark stood up from the couch and left Jason puzzling over his set of scrambled letters at the coffee table. He walked past a mountain of boxes piled up to the ceiling with labels like, _Jason's toys_, _Lois's clothes_, _Good China (Clark, if you break this, I'll kill you). _He and Lois had spent the last few days loading up boxes with her delicate possessions. The apartment back in Metropolis was going to be awfully crowded. At least, until all the repairs were finished on the _Kent_ farm house in a few months. Lois was to report at the _Daily Planet _in one week, and she still hadn't finished packing.

When he opened the door from her apartment and into the hallway, he found Lois sitting down at the top of the stairs. She'd given up on the keys, her head leaned against the banister. Her fingers fiddled with the straps on her purse, occasionally brushing away a tear or two that crept out of her red, blotchy eyes. Richard had succeeded in making a fine mess out of her again. Even behind bars, he somehow managed to keep a strangling hold on her life.

"Richard didn't take it very well did he?"

Lois didn't move. Her eyes were fixed on the crumbling apartment wall across from her. Clark stepped forward several paces and slowly bent down to her level and joined her on the stairs. "What did he say?"

After several seconds of silence, watching Lois stumble around in her mind at a loss for words, she simply replied. "Nothing." Her curls bounced around her sopping wet face as she shook her head still in disbelief. "Nothing important anyway. He doesn't even _care_, Clark."

Clark edged closer to her on the stairs. He wasn't entirely sure what to say. He knew this would happen. He knew that she was only walking into more heartbreak to meet with him. He had begged her not to go. But she insisted that he know Jason's paternity so that he couldn't go spreading around the news. She just wanted to protect her son.

"What about the paternity test? Did he buy it?"

Lois tilted her head slightly. Her brow furrowed curiously as if she was fumbling around with the thoughts in her mind. "He did, but...I don't think he was upset that Jason was _Clark's_. He was more concerned with the idea that Jason _wasn't Superman's_. It was just strange." She quickly dismissed the thought with a shake of her curls, "But I guess it doesn't even matter. I still have to go in there and tell Jason that Daddy's never coming home again."

Clark reached for her hand. "You don't have to tell him yet, if you're not ready."

"Of course I do. Richard's face is plastered on every news network in the city. You think he won't figure it out?" Her hand clenched firmly around his as she hissed through gritted teeth. "I would rather tell him now, than have some stuck up, know-it-all kid at school tell him that his Father has gone to jail for the rest of his life." Her words were trembling with fury. Clark could see the pools of rage boiling in the depths of her eyes. There was nothing left for Richard but hatred.

"I could tell him for you." Clark's thumb began to circle around on her hand in a soothing motion. "O-or maybe," He stammered cautiously, prepared for Lois to jump up and attack him with the very idea, "Maybe...it would be easier on Jason to know that...Richard really isn't his Father."

Clark knew this was a sensitive time to bring up the subject. But he honestly thought it would be a true comfort to Jason to know the truth. He had prepared himself for Lois to lunge at the suggestion bitterly.

Instead she only exhaled deeply and forced herself to turn her head in his direction. Her eyes rested on his reassuring grip.

"I _know _how much you want to tell him." She whispered lightly, "I see it every time you look at him. I can tell how much _you _want to be called Daddy."

Clark lowered his head with a sad little smile in spite of himself, "Is it that obvious?"

"I want to tell him too. But I just don't think that-"

"Did Mr. Clark take Daddy away?"

Clark froze when Lois was cut off by a tiny peep from behind. Clark turned around just in time to see Jason timidly tip-toeing out of the door. His fingers played nervously with a handful of _Scrabble _tiles as he approached them both curiously,

"You did, didn't you? The lady on T.V said Superman took Daddy to prison. Why? And why are you lying, Mommy?" The gloomy little expression on Jason's face was enough to break Clark's heart in two. This wasn't going to be easy.

"I'm not lying, sweetheart." Lois replied after a moment of Jason's eyes dancing back and forth on them.

"Yes you are." Jason nodded without a doubt, "You just said you were going to tell me that Daddy isn't coming home. I heard you. Why were you going to lie to me, Mommy?"

Clark's gaze traveled from Jason's anxious waddle forward to Lois's frantic expression. He watched her open her mouth to reply but close it again with uncertainty. She probably didn't even have the slightest idea of what to say.

"You're Mother wasn't going to lie to you, Jason." Clark stepped in bravely. He could hardly believe the words were leaving his mouth. He wanted to tell Jason for so long now. Though, this wasn't quite the way he envisioned it. "I did take Richard away. But only because he was going to hurt a lot of people if I didn't."

Jason only shook his head. "My Daddy doesn't hurt people...he just..." He had begun to protest until he suddenly trailed off. His eyes wandered down over Clark. Scanning him carefully as if he was deciding whether or not to believe him. "Daddy _did_ try to hurt you once." Jason recalled quickly. The memory of Superman lying in his own puddle of blood on their living room floor played over in Jason's mind. "He had that green stuff. Just like the bald man on the boat did."

There was a helpless look of horror forming across Jason's face as he put the puzzle pieces together. His fingers rattled with the tiles around in his palms. "Why did Mommy say that you're my Daddy? Is that why I can do all the things like you? Like hearing really loud and make fire?"

Clark nodded slowly. "Yes. But...I had to go away for a long time, so Richard..."

"Pretended to be my Daddy? So Mommy wouldn't be lonely?" Jason finished thoughtfully.

"Uh..." Clark's eyes shifted towards Lois for approval, who simply shrugged and nodded her head in agreement. "Yes, Jason. He was there for awhile, and he took care of you both. But I'm back now and I won't leave again."

Jason bit his lower lip pensively as he soaked up the information. "So...you're going to be my new Daddy now right, Mr. Clark? Are you going to stay with us? And play catch with me? And help me with my spell long words with _Scrabble_? And watch me play piano?"

Clark rested a calming hand on his son's shoulder and looked him directly in the eye, "I am going to be with you ever single day, Jason. I'll teach you how to hit a home run, I'll teach you how to spell_ catastrophic_ without any _F'_s," Clark tilted his head and gave Lois a wink, "And I will hear every single note you play at every single piano recital until your fingers fall off...does that work for you?"

Clark watched proudly as a soft, hopeful expression lit up over Jason's face as he leaped into Clark's arms.

"Look," Jason opened his palm to reveal a few hidden _Scrabble_ tiles. "I made a word with the _Y_ tile at the end." Jason rearranged the tiles to spell a single three letter word. "Can you also teach me how to _F-L-Y_?"

* * *

**Clark is officially **_**Daddy. **_**Like it? You think Richard still has something up his sleeve? I had fun writing the **_**Scrabble **_**scene...I've been playing that game every night for the last week with my family...I haven't won yet...**

**Note: Uh. Okay. Yes I know it would probably be a LOT longer than three months before Richard's trial. But for the sake of time in my story, I'm going to bend reality a little. :)**

**PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW:P!**


	39. Planet

_**Chapter 39: Planet**_

"_Oh, thank God_!" Lois exclaimed as she fell back in her chair, stretching her arms to the heavens with enthusiasm.

"Somebody's in a good mood." Clark treaded towards her desk and delivered a steaming hot mug of stimulating liquid caffeine.

She beamed back up at him and eagerly snatched up the mug. "I haven't felt so alive in _months_. I'm chaining my ankle to this desk and never leaving again." She said, trying to suppress a yawn. "Although, I haven't had to get up so early for months either."

Lois let her eyes wander around the hectic, bustling environment surrounding her desk. People were rushing back and forth, papers and documents were scattered chaotically on the ground, fingers were tapping furiously away at keyboards, Mariah Carry, and Led Zeppelin ring tones were tinkling in the background waiting to be answered. The_ Planet _was a disaster zone. A disordered, frantic, permanent state of cluttered commotion. Just the way she liked it.

"Six months." Lois mused after a desperately needed swallow of caffeine. "And the _Daily Planet _hasn't even experienced the slightest inkling of change."

"I don't know about that," Clark's gaze floated across the frantic pandemonium to the other side of the room. His face fell when he rested his eyes on a deserted, chair and an uncharacteristically tidy mahogany desk isolated in the corner. "Jimmy hasn't woken up."

Lois's brief sudden burst of upbeat optimism suddenly vanished. The thought of never seeing that happy-go-lucky grin of the young, spirited photographer, ever again was finally starting to sink in.

"It's been about two months now, hasn't it?" Lois let her hand, with an inconspicuous attempt, slide overtop of his to offer some sort of comfort. "Clark, you know that he might not-"

"He will." He spoke with a heavy tone of confidence in his voice. "Chloe visits him everyday. He'll wake for her."

Lois didn't know how to respond. She knew as well as Clark did that Jimmy's chance of ever regaining consciousness was slim, and slipping further away with each day. She didn't press the matter. They didn't need to come to terms with anything just yet. As long as they had the slightest bit of hope, Jimmy still had a chance.

"So," Clark cleared his throat quickly and glanced down over her shoulder onto her screen. "Perry's got you working on something already?"

"It's just a small piece. Nothing in the world seems to matter expect for the bomb attempt. Richard White is the focal point right now." Lois lifted her head and reached across her desk for a slim stack of brightly colored papers. "And that got me thinking..." She began with uncertainty, "Perry is getting a lot of attention right now because of his family ties. I want to try to keep Jason away from that." She handed Clark the vibrant colored registration papers, "Those are for Jason's new school. He'll be starting the first grade and I don't want him to feel any pressure from the other kids about his relationship to Richard. I don't want him to use the White name anymore."

Clark's gaze skimmed down the page briefly until he came to the dotted line. "Jason _Kent_?" His mouth fell open as he gawked down at the page in bewilderment. "Really?"

Lois shrugged her shoulders. "If that's alright with you, I'll go make it official this afternoon."

Clark was immediately overwhelmed with pride. Jason Kent. There was a satisfying ring to it. Clark beamed down at the name with warm ball of joy swelling up in his chest. It was perfect.

"Lane!"

Clark watched Lois practically leap out of her chair at Perry's command. She met him with a smile and replied in a sort of sing-song voice, "_Coming!_"

* * *

Lois couldn't help but burst through Perry's office with a small skip. Chloe was leaning against the wall; her arms folded patiently seemingly waiting for her arrival. Perry's eyes were glued to his desk as he sat sullenly flipping through his morning mail. Both seemed rather dreary, not nearly floating as high on happiness as Lois was. She met them with a bright toothy greeting and chirped, "Mornin' Chief," 

She saw Chloe's expression twist into an awkward gawp, probably surprised at Lois's unusual morning buoyancy. "How many cups of coffee have you _had_?"

"Just one." Lois replied with a wink as she strode gracefully to the edge of Perry's desk. "What can I do for you, Mr. White?"

Perry tilted his head slowly up at her, his face giving her the same awkward look of suspicion as her cousin. But he didn't question her. He knew better than to mess with a good thing. As long as Lois wasn't whining, he was satisfied.

"You've got mail," Perry grunted as he revealed a long manila envelop that had been hidden under the scattered mess of paper swathing his desk.

Lois's eyes widened as she felt a swift sting of alarm shoot through her veins. Her smile vanished.

_More pictures? How could he? Richard is in jail? Maybe it's _not_ Richard? Is it from someone else?_

Lois immediately snatched up the envelope and scanned it quickly before ripping it open. _What has Perry seen?_

Her name was cursive written neatly on the front with a thin black marker. Probably written by a woman, but Jimmy would have known better...

She shook the envelope until a slender plastic case slipped out into her hand.

"That came for you about a week ago." Perry informed, satisfying only a fraction of her curiosity, "It's a DVD."

Lois's heart fluttered madly in her chest. Whatever was on that disk probably contained something that had to do with Clark. "Did you watch it?" She swallowed thickly.

"Yes, so did Sullivan." Perry gestured to Chloe in the corner, who gave Lois a hard stare of assurance. Her deep green eyes were blazing, as if to give Lois a message of significance.

"So...what is it?" Lois spoke carefully after a moment of unexpected silence between the three.

"It's an account of Lex Luthor's actions that incriminate him for the blackout last year. Also for his plans for New Krypton...and Superman's murder."

Lois froze in mid-breath. "W-what do you mean...murder?"

"Attempted murder, obviously. On New Krypton. That man can take one hell of a beating."

Lois tilted her head with curiosity, not really understanding what Perry meant. "And why haven't you given it to the police?" She inquired harshly.

"Because it's addressed to _you_." Perry gestured a finger at Chloe, "You and Sullivan are going to do a piece on this disk and _everything _on it."

"B-but you don't even know who it's from. It could all just be a farce, Chief! I don't think that-"

"That's why _you _are going to find the source. Find out who sent it, and get it on the front page."

"Perry, this is ridiculous." Lois let her arms fall to her sides. "I wouldn't even know where to start. Luthor had been missing since last year. I don't even know-"

"I'm sure you'll have no trouble narrowing it down, Lois."

"This is evidence to a police investigation! You have to-"

"Less talking, more typing." Perry gave her a gentle nudge towards the door. "The sooner you watch it, the sooner I can take it in."

Lois gave the Chief a fiery glare. He had pushed a needle through her delicate bubble of bliss. The weight of reality tumbled back down onto her shoulders as she fiddled agitatedly with the disk. " You _know_ this is probably a fake, Perry. You _know_ what people can do with today's technology."

There was a slight twitch of an amusement on Perry's lips. "I don't know, Lois." He narrowed his eyes sharply and added, "You looked pretty real to me."

* * *

**Note: Okay. I bet you're all wondering about this DVD. Think back to the movie, remember that guy with the video camera? One of Luthor's men practically video taped the entire plan. So let's play into the whole 'what if' world and say that the video tape somehow survived the ordeal on New Krypton. Don't understand? Don't worry, I'll explain how it may have been able to in the next chapter. You'll get it soon, I promise :)**

**Please leave a review! I PROMISE to update within the next week. I feel SO horribly bad for making you all wait for long. (Exams were hell) I am very pleased and thankful for all of the sudden new readers that have joined in, I hope you enjoyed this short little chapter. The nest one will be longer.**

**Thanks for the beta, Lilly! **


	40. Replay

**Sheesh! This took me forever to write! But I hope it was worth the wait! I think you'll finally understand more about the video tape here...**

**In case you're interested, I also wrote a Valentines Superman Returns Oneshot for the livejournal community **_**12daysofClois**_** and a short Smallville oneshot for Clark's Birthday and posted them both on fanfiction. Hope you enjoy :).**

**Thanks for the beta, Lilly!**

* * *

_**Chapter 40: Replay **_

_"What do you know about crystals?"_

_"...They make great chandeliers."_

Lois tapped her fingers on her desk impatiently and glaring fiercely at the computer monitor. _I can't believe this got on tape. I can't believe he got _me _on tape._

She shook her head and inhaled a long weary breath. How could she have_ missed _the camera? Luthor wasn't stupid enough to leave it in plain sight. He probably had it hidden in the corner or in the walls or the bookcase or something...

To be frank, the idea of Luthor secretly videotaping her every move, just pissed her right off_. Okay_, she reasoned with herself coolly, S_o maybe it was my fault for walking straight onto that boat in the first place, but come on! He didn't need to tape the whole thing!_

She'd been painfully suffering through what seemed like hours of Perry's mysterious disk. It was nearly ten; most of the staff had already left. Listening to Luthor's dreadful monologue all over again was like slowly shoving sharp pencils in her eyes.

_"You're...building an island?"_

_"You're not seeing the big picture here, Ms. Lane! Let me enlarge it for you..." _Luthor almost seemed to skip across the screen. _"Not just an island, an entirely new continent-"_

"Hey Cuz'," Lois reached for the volume dial on her speaker and tuned out Luthor's irritating little echo as Chloe peeked over the monitor with a cheerful spring in her step. "I'm going to grab a cheeseburger. Want anything? Some popcorn to go along with your four star flick? Or are you more of a candy kind of girl-?"

"_No_." Lois raised her glare, dampening Chloe's spirit. "I can't believe Perry is making me sit through this."

"Yeah, Luthor's plans were pretty twisted." Chloe agreed simply. "It's actually pretty mundane. You should fast forward through all the monologuing. Oh, but you should definitely watch the part where he launches the Kryptonite into the ocean. I think that's probably how New Krypton was formed."

_"But millions of people will die."_

_"BILLIONS! Once again, the press underestimates me. This is front page news."_

Lois chewed her lower lip. A growing agitation welling up in the pit of her stomach. "I'm not sure how much more of this cue ball I can take."

Chloe shrugged. "Watch whatever you think you need to. I've seen it all so I'll go into detail with it if we really must."

Lois let some of her aggravation fade away at Chloe's unexpected thoughtfulness. This was the first assignment she'd worked on with her cousin in years. She couldn't help but appreciate Chloe's helpful heart. That was one of the things she always admired in her cousin. Besides her exceptional journalism talent, Chloe was always willing to share the load so you never felt like you were alone. In a way she was kind of like Clark, always right there when you needed her. And even Lois's pessimistic late-night nature was brightened by her cousin's ray of optimism.

"Anyway, a cheeseburger and french-fries are calling me. Be back in a jiffy." Chloe gathered her purse and sprung towards the elevator in a swift hurry. Before Lois reluctantly gave her attention back to her computer, Chloe turned around and spoke her name in a less joyful tone, "Lois," She watched Chloe narrow her eyes, making sure she had Lois's full attention before going on. "I have to warn you, there is a part of that DVD that you should not watch."

Lois furrowed her brow in immediate interest. "Why not?"

"Because the last scene on the tape is...well, let's just say that it's not pretty." Chloe lowered her voice. Lois got the hint, knowing Chloe probably didn't want to risk speaking Clark's name aloud when referring to the tape. That was smart. Lois had forgotten how much more experience Chloe had when it came to keeping Clark's secret on the down-low.

Nevertheless, she brushed off Chloe's concern carelessly, "I think I can handle anything Luthor can dish out, Chloe." A hint of a smile tugged at the corner of her lips, "I'm a big girl now."

The stern frown on her cousin's face did not fade at Lois's light humor. "Just don't watch it." She instructed firmly. "We're _not _putting that scene in the story anyway, so don't waste your time. Take Jason and go home." Chloe gestured to the tiny little lump hidden amongst the coats and jackets on the swivel chair. Jason's lower half was buried in the comforts of autumn fashion outer -where, sound asleep. The grave solemnity in Chloe's expression grew fainter at the sight of Jason's contentment, "You might want to think about bringing a sleeping bag for the munchkin if you plan on pulling another one of these all-nighters."

With that, Chloe turned away again as the elevator doors slid open with a_ ding_. Lois waited for the doors to seal again before she forced herself to turn to the computer. Chloe was kind, but a little overprotective. Lois was more than confident that nothing on this disk could set her off more than Luthor's raving mad ambitions. She turned up the volume on her speaker again just as Luthor's voice erupted.

"_Come on, let me hear you say it, just once_."

"_You're insane_."

"_No! Not that, the other thing. Come on I know it's just dangling off the tip of your tongue. Let me hear it just once, please?"_

"_Superman will never_-"

"_WRONG!"_

_Alright, _Lois scoffed in disgust. _ I've had enough of this. _She hit the pause button with her mouse. He _was_ insane. And this _was_ a waste of her life.

She was about gather her purse and Jason's backpack and call it a night when she stopped. Maybe it was her insatiable curiosity that was preventing her from just leaving the rest of the disk to her imagination, or maybe it was her reporter's instincts that made her want to follow it through. But there was unsatisfied pit of annoyance in her chest. It wasn't finished until it was in print. That's what she had lived by. To suddenly put all of her values to the side for one psychotic mad-man would bug her for the rest of the night.

She let out an irritated groan and cursed her curiosity. _Freakin' hairless lunatic is going to keep me up all night._

Then again, Chloe was right. She didn't need to watch the _entire_ disk. And that was more than enough to persuade her to click the fast forward button on the tool bar at the bottom of her screen. She leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms while watching the images whiz around on screen. Finally when the DVD proceeded to show her something worth while she tapped the play button. Luthor was standing at the bow of his smoothly swindled billion dollar yacht that he _inherited_. The camera shook violently behind him.

Lois watched intently as Luthor slid one of the crystals from the fortress in between the thick cylinder of sickly green Kryptonite.

_That bastard._ She should have known. Superman's crystal was the source of New Krypton. She watched as it was launched into the ocean. _That's what must have caused that earthquake in Metropolis._

Lois clicked the fast forward button again. There wasn't anything particularly interesting after that. There was bit of static that screwed up the screen for a few seconds, probably because the guy videotaping dropped the camera. She was about to give up, when finally the camera flashed onto a new scene that Lois didn't recognize.

The camera was still, set aside on a flat, stable surface. It was in an awkward position. Playing cards and a thick, smoking cigar were shuffled off to the sides. Luthor probably didn't even know the camera had been switched on. There were a few smudges of watery of blurs on the screen, but no rain. Just scattered pools of water on the ground. There were no particular shapes she could make out. The environment was dark and cloudy. A bright flicker of lightning would occasionally strike in the distance and a drumming boom of thunder would roar above.

Lois was suddenly deeply intrigued. The environment was so unique. It was almost similar in structure to Superman's fortress, but much darker. Much more... lonely. Almost if the island itself was wicked. Long jagged spear shaped crystals with razor pointed tips stuck out of the ground giving shape to the towering serrated, uneven walls that loomed down over the rough, puddled terrain. _Could this be...New Krypton? _

"_See anything familiar?" _A quick jolt of alarm shot through Lois's heart as Luthor's booming voice seemed to come out of nowhere.

"_I see an old man's sick joke_." Her jaw fell open. Her heart began to race as she watched Superman appear across the left side of the screen pacing forward..._slowly._

_Oh God,_ Lois felt a twisted ball of dread well up in her stomach. _Is this what Chloe was talking about?_

"_Really? Because I see my new apartment."_

Three other men who Lois recognized from other parts of the tape edged out from behind the sharp, razor shapes sticking out of the ground, forming the entire structure.

"_And a place for Kitty, one for my friends and that place over there I'll rent out_."

Superman had begun to climb up a rough layer of overlapping rocks that appeared almost like stairs leading up to the flat platform that Luthor stood so tall and proud on.

Lois narrowed her eyes, focusing her intense gaze underneath the blade edged rocks and rubble. There was a faint green glow radiating from the ground. And it was _everywhere_.

"_But you know, maybe you're right. Maybe it is a little cold. It's--what's the word I'm searching for? It's a little...alien. It lacks that human touch_."

As Luthor rambled on, Superman had proceeded to climb. He met Luthor dead center in the middle of the platform. Only inches apart from each other, his bright blue eyes gunned down on Luthor like an icy blast.

"_You have something that belongs to me." _Superman spoke sternly, but Lois detected a hint of worry in his voice. Almost as if he knew what he was walking into. Luthor stared directly back. The two stood motionless for a matter of seconds. A deathly silence hung between them. Lois's heart was nearly bursting out of her chest with fear. She knew that Superman had _somehow_ ended up in the ocean with the razor blade of Kryptonite pierced through his side. Barley clinging to life when she pulled him from the raging sea, Clark had narrowly escaped with his life. Although Lois hadn't been prepared to actually _watch_ what kind of torture he suffered through on camera. _What did Luthor do to him?  
_

Lois gasped. Superman had suddenly been hurled across the screen, tumbling down the rocky stairway and into a pool of green with only one swift strike from Luthor's bundled fist.

_"__Krrrrryptonite!"_

Hardly even exposed to the Kryptonite, she watched Superman struggle just to get back onto his knees. Even from her limited image, she could see him shaking.

_"You're asking yourself __**how?**_" Luthor stepped down off his platform after Superman. Lois nearly leaped out of her chair in alarm as Luthor began to lash out at Superman with a few vicious thuds of his boot. _"Didn't your Dad ever teach you to __**look before you leap**__?"_

Luthor leaned down, hovering only inches away from Superman's painful screaming expression. _"Crystals. They're amazing aren't they? They inherit the traits of the minerals around them. Kind of like a son, inheriting the traits of his __**father**__!"_ Luthor gave Superman another hurried kick in the jaw. Lois could now feel the sharp pricking of tears beginning to well up in her eyes.

_"You took away five years of my life. I'm just returning the favor!"_ Luthor moved in for another kick. Superman was ready for it this time. He held up his hands and caught Luthor's boot. For a foolish moment she thought Superman might have it in him to fight back. Her heart sunk when one of the three men surrounding the scene joined in. Lois winced as he was dragged away from Luthor, kicking and screaming through the mud. He hollered hopeless pleas and mumbled screams that Lois couldn't make out into words. She was literally sitting on the edge of her seat, nerves tense and mouth dry, Lois clung tightly to the arms of her chair with sweaty palms. Everything seemed to drown out around her. Nothing but the fuzzy image of the monitor was in eye sight. It almost seemed like it was happening. And she could do nothing but watch. Only the sound of her own pounding heart, and Superman's endless chilling cries filled her ears.

She watched Superman crawl feebly through the sludge and the mucky puddles desperately trying to get away. Luthor's men caught up with him. Lois cupped her hands over her mouth to keep from screaming. She let the hot tears drip down her cheeks without brushing them away. _ Just let him go. _She pleaded silently. She continued to weep as she watched Luthor's men kick and hit and beat Superman until he could crawl no further. All three of them lifted him up for a brief moment and Lois winced as one socked him hard in the stomach. He fell back down to his knees and collapsed onto the ground again in exhaustion.

_Just stop! _He didn't deserve this kind of brutal torture. _How could Luthor have done that to him? How could anyone hurt him like that? _Clark was the sweetest and gentlest man the world would ever know. How could someone be so twisted as to hurt _him?_

She sobbed as one of the tall, skinny men grabbed fistfuls of Superman's hair and yanked his neck down, drowning his face in the murky pools of water. Luthor paced forward in the background, drifting dangerously close to Superman's flailing motions.

_This is it, _Lois realized with a bundle of fright welling up in her chest. _Clark got that Kryptonite stuck in his side somehow...this is it._

The other three men backed off immediately at Luthor's approach. Superman lifted his head out of the pool, sputtering out mouthfuls of water. He struggled forward, frantically making his final attempt to crawl away. He coughed and choked out more dribbles of water as he inched himself towards the edge of the island, reaching out for a final grasp of salvation from his suffering. But he didn't make it.

Luthor bent down to his height and wrapped his arm tightly around Superman's neck, forcing him up to his knees again. Superman let out a faint moan of anguish and a last gasp for air. It was as if he knew what was coming and was utterly helpless to do anything about it.

Lois turned away, but not before catching a faint green glimmer in Luthor's tight grip. She closed her eyes and only listened. There was a sudden deafening scream of agony that echoed throughout the malicious walls of the dark fortress. It sent chills down her spine. She desperately wanted to reach through the screen and shelter him from all of the streaming pain that made him let out such distressful, thunderous cry.

She opened her teary eyes and gazed through her blurry slits. The jagged, razor tip of the green glowing blade had pierced straight through Superman's suit and dug in through his flesh. Lois could hear his wheezing gasps of shock.

"_Now fly." _Luthor commanded and released his lock around Superman's neck. Superman fell to the ground once more with a thud. Lois felt her heart skip a beat at the sight of his limp, lifeless body.

_Get up! _She prayed._ Just get up! Just fly away!_

She let out a loud teary sob. It hurt so much to see him like this. And the fact that it was it was on tape was enough to form a twisted knot of worry in her stomach. If whoever had the original copy of this DVD made this public, it would be free to circulate throughout the entire world._ Myspace, Youtube_, the whole world would be able to view it on any internet video site on the web. Getting it out in print was one thing, but the actual video was quite another. Everyone would be able to see the world's greatest hero at his worst. To see him fail. To see him at the mercy of the one of the world's most loathed and despised criminal masterminds of all time. To see him fall to his knees at Lex Luthor's feet. She couldn't even imagine the shame and disgrace Clark would be put through. It would destroy him.

"Lois?"

Lois was rattled out of her grim and dreary thoughts as a gentle hand placed itself softly on her shoulder.

_No! No, no!_ She mentally began to panic when she felt a sudden faint feeling of warmth approach from behind. _He can't see this! It'll hurt him too much! _She frantically scrambled to search for the _stop _button on the screen, but hit the _pause _instead. Frozen on the screen was the image of her exhausted fallen hero, stumbling backwards towards the edge of the cliff that was only steps behind him.

"Lois, I heard you crying." Lois followed Clark's gentle voice and met his concerned gaze with a quick swivel of her chair. "What's wrong?" He seemed taken aback by her red puffy eyes and streaming tears flowing down her rosy red cheeks. "Hey," Clark knelt down and brushed away a few of her tears and gave her comforting smile. "Whatever it is, it can't be _that_ bad."

She didn't say anything. She waited for his eyes to wander from her quivering lips to the computer. His smile fell like a plummeting rock. His mouth dropped open and his eyes went wide. The color drained away from his face and was replaced by a ghostly white. Lois winced as she fought off the urge to just wrap her arms around his neck and shield him from Luthor's endless cruelty and the disk that now played the horrific event before his eyes.

"Where...d-did you get this?" Clark stammered with a tremor in his voice. She could see the shame radiating from his eyes. This wasn't how he wanted her to see him. He didn't want her to see the nightmare he went through on New Krypton.

Lois could see a hint of fear in his expression. Fear that any respect she had for him was gone. That she would never put him back on his pedestal of glory again.

Clark leaned forward and embraced her sobbing and trembling body. She clutched the soft material of his jacket in her fingers tightly. Never wanting to let go. "Why didn't you tell me?" She muttered between hysterical sobs. "Why didn't you _tell_ me what he did to you?"

Clark swallowed hard. Trying to gather the right words. "I didn't want you to see me like that. I didn't want you to see me as a...failure." Clark admitted uneasily.

"But you're _not_!" She pulled him closer, trying to reassure his doubt. "I could never see you as a failure! You're the most amazing person I know, Clark! You're caring and generous, and kind. You're...you're_ perfect_-!"

"I'm not." Clark shook his head. "Everybody thinks I am. They expect me to never disappoint. Everyone thinks Superman can do no wrong and it's _not _true. I was afraid you thought that way and now I've disappointed you. I have flaws and problems just like everyone else-"

"That's_ not _what I meant. I don't expect anything from you. I know you have faults and weaknesses. You're _not_ invincible and I don't want you to be. I didn't mean that you were some kind of God, Clark. I meant that you were perfect _for me_."

Clark pulled away slightly. She saw an unexpected look of surprise of his face. He could only stare speechlessly at her. Touched by her words and so grateful for her understanding.

She sniffed and met his stare with proud beam, "You couldn't disappoint me even if you _tried_."

* * *

**So, who sent the tape? You'll find out in the next chapter! Please feel free to give me a kick in the butt for taking so long to update. Lot's more to come!**

**Please leave another wonderful review:)**


	41. The real truth

**Chapter 41: The real truth**

"What do you mean you _don't know!_?"

"I..._don't know_."

"Why didn't you track her down!?"

"I didn't think-"

"That's right you didn't _think! _She's a criminal, Clark! She should be rotting away in cell!"

"She didn't really do anything _wrong_, Lois."

"My _foot_." Lois spat bitterly as she stormed through the elevator doors of the_ Planet. _Clark treaded timidly behind her rather conspicuous march across the bullpen. "I saw her on the disk. She stood there and _watched _Luthor beat the living crap out of you." Lois suddenly came to a halt and spun around on her heel keeping her voice to a harsh whisper. "She _knew_ it was wrong and did _nothing_ to stop him." She dumped her purse and her notes on her desk and glared at Clark with a disapproving frown. "You said that Kitty Kowalski-"

"_Katherine_." Clark corrected with the hint of a smug smile.

Lois narrowed her eyes, snapping her jaw shut with short tolerance for Clark's twisted amusement. "Alright, _Katherine_ Kowalski, was the only person who survived on New Krypton besides Luthor. So she is the only one who would have access to the disk. And you're saying she's gone _AWOL_ on us, and you don't have the slightest clue where she could be?"

Clark blinked. It all sounded so pathetic when she said like _that_. "...Yes." He answered lamely after a long apprehensive delay.

"So _why_ do we need to find her again?"

"Because she might have some idea where my crystals are. Unless Luthor still has them..." Clark cleared his throat and looked away. "And because Perry told us too..."

Lois shot him a scowl and she began shovelling through the scattered mess of paper on her desk. "Perry White and his Sunday Magazine exposes...this is so _yesterday's_ news. It happened over a year ago. You think he could get us on something more important-"

"Katrina Kowalski." Clark glanced up and watched as Chloe put Lois's rambling mouth to a halt and waved a folded piece of paper in her face. "Is the closest living relative of Katherine Kowalski. She's her sister. I found the address. She might know where Katherine is."

"Great." Lois took the address from Chloe with an eager swipe. "I just can't wait to give that snivelling little wench a real piece of my mind-"

"Actually," Clark piped up quickly. "I thought...maybe it would be better if I went to talk to her alone, Lois."

"_What?"_ Lois's expression turned to stone. "Why?"

"I think it would be...more helpful if Superman talked to her." Clark suggested carefully. "Katherine seems to have a certain..._admiration_ for Superman."

Lois's face twisted into a jealous, sour glare. "Well I have plenty of _admiration_ for him too."

"I know you do." Clark smiled and took her hand. "But I don't think your sensational charm will be as effective on her as Superman's."

Lois's fierce stare began to soften as she toyed with the idea in her mind. "But Superman...only has that certain _admiration _for me, right?"

Clark mentally breathed a sigh of relief as she stared up at him playfully. "Yes." He gathered her lightly into his arms and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. A few people looked up from their desks and glared disapprovingly at Clark's sudden embrace. He didn't care. He was happy that Lois wanted to make their relationship public, even in the newsroom. He didn't care what they thought or how they compared him to Richard. He just wanted this to _finally_ work.

"_Ahem." _Chloe folded her arms while a cheeky grin tugged the corners of her lips as she stared at the affectionate couple. "Perry wants our article by tonight, Lois."

Lois reluctantly pulled herself away. "Well what are you still doing here, Kent? We need an interview and we need it _now_."

* * *

Lois's fingers ran wildly across her keyboard furiously tapping the last few letters of her latest puff piece on the health risks of public smoking. Maybe Perry was just trying to ease her back into the world of fast paced mass media but this was _ridiculous_...

But she couldn't really complain. It was better than nothing. Keeping her mind focused on her work gave her less time to be distracted by a certain unsettling sense of annoyance in the back of her thoughts.

_2 hours! What could they possibly be doing that would keep him there for 2 freakin' hours!_

As she stared down at the taunting digital clock in the corner of her screen she chewed the inside of her lip agitatedly. This had been two hours of torture. What was taking him so long? Couldn't Clark just _beat_ it out of her?

_Just relax, Lane. He probably just got sidetracked with another emergency after dealing with Kitty..._She shook her head and turned her attention back to her screen and read silently. _Smoking is the number one cause of lung cancer...bla, bla bla...contains additives such as __Acetylpyrazine, Aconitic Acid, Citric acid... more words I can't pronounce, bla, bla, bla...is likely to cause cancer, heart disease, emphysema...bla, bla, bla..._

_Ding._

Lois's head snapped up in attention as the elevator doors swung open and she watched Clark stroll casually towards her desk, still fiddling with his tie.

"Hi, Loi-"

"What took you so _long_?" She stood up from her desk and glared at him with a sour expression.

"I was with-"

"Katherine? Yeah, for _two hours_!" Lois snatched the end of his tie out of his fumbling fingers and roughly began to straighten it for him. "Where is she living? Is she miserable?"

"No, not miserable exactly-"

"Never mind. Did she send the disk?" She gruffly wrapped the long green strand of material around his neck.

"Yes...Lois that's kind of tight-"

"How does she have the nerve to wait an entire year before sending it to us? And why me? Why not the police?"

"I'll tell you if you just let me-"

"I bet she had your crystals, didn't she? When they lock up that two faced witch they just better throw away the key or I might not be able to resist from strangling that-"

"Lois! I understand that you're upset, but please don't take your frustration out on my tie."

Lois looked down, realizing that her fingers were wrapped firmly around a thick knot of material yanked up to his neck. "Oh," She let go and softened her stare. "Sorry."

Clark undid the knotted bundle on his chest as Lois threw herself back down in her chair trying to grasp the final strands of her patience. "So...she _did _send the disk?"

"Yes." He nodded. "She told me that before she and Lex left New Krypton she slipped the disk into her pocket. I guess Luthor didn't notice. She sent it to you because she figured you should have been the first one to see it, since Superman had no mailing address."

Lois opened her mouth to ask another question but Clark answered before she could make a sound. "She waited all of this time because she wanted all of the hype about Luthor and New Krypton to die down a little so it wouldn't look suspicious. She was just trying to protect herself."

Lois rolled her eyes. "I still think we should turn her in. She might know where Luthor is-"

"She doesn't." Clark shook his head with a stern confidence in his voice. "She wouldn't be living in a two story bungalow in the suburbs with her sister if she did. She's trying to keep a low profile right now."

Lois let out a long sigh. "Fine." She said, still not completely convinced. "Can Chloe and I use any of this for our article?"

"She said you could but it has to remain anonymous...Perry won't like it but it's better than nothing."

Lois was already punching in Chloe's cell number on her phone when Clark motioned for her to put the receiver down.

"There's something else." He lowered his voice as Lois suddenly clued in. "Oh! Right, your crystals. Did she have them?"

"No." Clark's tone grew deeper as his expression turned solemn. "She...threw them out of the helicopter at the last minute." Clark paused, waiting to see if Lois would put it together. When she didn't Clark took in a long breath, "They're on New Krypton."

"Oh," Her face fell. She knew how important those crystals were to him, and how angry he was when he returned to find that they were gone. Even after Luthor stole them, she knew that he had hoped that he would get them back somehow. Now that he knew that there was no hope, she saw a glimmer look of disappointment in his eyes. "_Oh_, Clark, I'm so sorry."

Clark stiffened and looked away. "They were all I had left of my..." His voice broke as he spoke. Lois had rarely ever heard him speak about Krypton. It wasn't something that he liked to talk about. "Of my home..." He choked out finally. It was things like this that reminded Lois that Clark was different. Sure, there was the flying and the heat vision and all of his other remarkable abilities that separated him from everyone else in the world. But it was more than that. Lois found herself often forgetting how different he really was. That he was actually..._alien_. That he was _alone_. And that no matter how much she loved him she knew that she would never be able to completely understand that feeling.

"I could have taught Jason about Krypton." Clark mused out loud. "I could have shown him everything."

"You still can." Lois assured. "You can still tell him everything. And you can show him the fortress. He'll understand, Clark, he'll-"

"It's not the same." Clark shook his head. "Lois, I think..." He began hesitantly with a look of uncertainty in his eyes, "I think I should go get them."

Lois froze. _Go get them?_ _On New Krypton?_ "Clark...that entire island is made of Kryptonite." Lois muttered with disbelief. He wasn't really thinking of going back there, was he? The last time he was there...she'd nearly lost him.

She sill remembered it quite clearly. The whole city would remember it for a long time. He seemed so small. She remembered staring outside the window of the sea plane. Just watching him, she didn't dare let her eyes wander even for a moment. He was like a tiny speck in the distance, dropping straight down from the clouds. He fell _so _far down. She'd never forget how hard her heart pumped in those few seconds of intense memorization. Her blood had stopped pumping. There was this sick, icy chill that filled her stomach with despair. It was only when she could no longer see his limp, lifeless body plummeting down back down to earth, when she realized she had forgot to breathe. Everything was so still in that moment. Everything she had hated about him was suddenly gone. It drained away with rest of her unsettling emotions of doubt and anger. Nothing else mattered. There was only one thought echoing off the walls of her mind.

_Just fly._

She closed her eyes and waited. Waited for Richard to tell her he was okay. Waiting for Jason to bound up and cheer. She waited for _anything _that would tell her he was alright. That he flew.

Then she heard it. But it wasn't what she wanted. She felt her heart fall into her stomach when there was a sudden rumble through the air. It was like ten thousand tons slamming down on concrete. It could be heard all through Metropolis.

He landed.

"No," Lois shook her head breathlessly. "No you can't, Clark."

"Lois...please try to understand-"

"No!" Lois felt her heart began to race at the thought. "I won't let you go back there, Clark. Those crystals aren't worth risking your life for!"

"I know that." Clark spoke softly. He understood her outrage but he wasn't ready to let it go. "But they are all I've got left of my family-"

"And what am _I_, Clark!? What about Jason!? What about Martha?! If we are not your family then who is-?"

"You know that's not what I meant, Lois." Clark lowered his voice. "You know that you all mean more to me than anything else-"

"Then why are you so determined to leave us!?" Lois stood up from her chair and shot an accusing glare down at him. "You left us all for five years! You were willing to lose us as long as it meant that you could get back to Krypton!"

Clark stared up at her with wide eyes. "That's...that's not true."

"It is." Lois felt her anger starting to cool when she stared down at Clark's hurt expression. It wasn't her intention to hurt him but she couldn't help it. "Deep down, you would have traded a life with us for a life on Krypton."

Lois swallowed thickly, not removing her stare from his face. The room fell silent for a moment as she waited for a reply but he said nothing. She wanted him to deny it. She wanted him to wrap his arms around her and tell her it was foolish of her to think that way. She wanted him to tell her that they were the only family he truly loved.

Instead he said nothing. Her heart broke. "It's true...isn't it, Clark? That's how you really feel..."

He raised his heavy stare and he opened his mouth to speak. "I-"

Clark was suddenly interrupted by a ringing chime from Lois's purse. She lowered her blurry gaze away from Clark's and fished around until she found it. The name on the screen read _Chloe_.

Lois flipped open her phone and walked to the other side of the room. It didn't matter if Clark heard them or not but she just couldn't bear to look at him any longer. "Hello?"

"_Lois, it's me_."

"Hi...Chloe. Listen...this really isn't the best time-"

"_I'm at the hospital. You have to come quick_."

"The hospital?" Lois's eyes wandered over towards Clark, who pretended to be watching the television screen above. "Why? What's the matter? Are you alright?"

"_It's Jimmy. I...I don't know what to do..." _Chloe informed in a frantic tone. "_Look I can't explain right now but please just get here. Bring Clark too_."

"We're coming, Chloe. Just wait there."

When Lois flipped her phone shut Clark looked down from the screen. "Come on." She motioned him towards the door as she gathered her purse. "Chloe needs our help."

* * *

**So Lois has definitely had got some unresolved feelings about Clark's five year absence. I know I took forever to write this, but my muse fainted on me. But it's alive and running now. I've already got half of the next chapter done. Thanks for the beta, Lilly! I'll update soon. I know I don't deserve it but plllease leave a review? Pretty please? -Puppy dog eyes-**


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